Baby Steps

Life can be so simple sometimes, like the talk they had in that coffee shop that day but unfortunately it never stays that way. Things have been hectic for both of them so their next meeting was one week later in Lexas apartment, to make things easier for the brunette.Going out still wasn't something that she liked so the decision was easy.

Clarke had a rough couple of days, many accidents one harder than the other so she her mood wasn't particularly good and she longed for a few relaxing hours with her...girlfriend? They still had to talk about that part but as promised the blonde tried to take it easy.

She finds herself on Lexas couch with ordered pizza and beer for her and a coke for the brunette.

Lexa was nervous the whole day, but she wanted to show Clarke that she could do this. It took her a couple of minutes talking herself into it but she managed to get some beer for the other woman. All she had in her fridge was coke and well chocolate milk….so not really suitable for a date. Afterwards while she was cleaning her place she looked around, her eyes stopping at the most precious things she owned lined up in a shelve. There were a few lightsabers, the helmet of Darth Vader, her letter from hogwarts including the books list and some sweets - all a gift from Anya - books and magazines on true crime, Lord of the Rings, Star Wars and so on. Her eyes glide to the various movie posters on the walls, god this place really looks like a child lives here. Should she maybe hide something? Make it look more adult? No, she is tired of hiding the things that make her Lexa, Clarke will have to have to deal with it.

Next step, pick an outfit for tonight. It needs to be something presentable. She wished she would feel comfortable in jeans but she can't stand the fabric, its itchy. At home she almost always wears her sweatpants but as Anya once told her it's usually frowned upon in public. One shopping trip later and her sister introduced her to the wonder of leggins. Soft and comfortable but still good for the public eye.

She picks her favourite kind, soft socks with christmas pattern on it - she loves Christmas, it makes her happy. A quick look through her t shirts and hoodies, all of them with either a Star Wars, Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter theme. Okay well...dang even those are not very adult but okay, she picks her favourite hoodie. There is the sign of Assassin's Creed printed on it, but it could be mistaken for something else so there.

At first Lexa thought about cooking something for Clarke but she remembers the last incident. She mixed up some spices as she tried to cook some spaghetti with tomato sauce...she had to throw her meal away and her stomach hurt for three days so the idea is quickly dismissed and she decides on ordering pizza. There's nothing that could go wrong with pizza.

Clarke stares at the door of Lexa's apartment for a couple of minutes now. She knows it's just a casual evening but still she cant help and be nervous. Okay girl, get yourself together. Just ring the bell, she is probably as nervous as you are.

Clarke could already feel her tension melt away as the door to the apartment opened, Lexa in the doorframe looking sinful good in leggins and a hoodie. The blonde would never admit it to anyone but she looked up a few things Lexa mentioned on the internet. First of all to have a clue about the brunette was talking about and well to impress her. The knows the symbol on the black hoodie but needs a moment to remember it.

"Hey you, thanks for the invite. I missed you."

A blush coats Lexa's cheeks as she opens the door to let her guest in.

"I missed you too. Please come in."

There they are, standing awkwardly next to the closed door, neither of them knows how they should greet each other probably. Clarke is the first one to move and pulls Lexa in a hug, slowly and carefully so the girl has some time to know what's coming and to prepare herself for it. The brunette tenses at first, like she did in the coffee shop but feels her body relaxing quickly. As they part Clarke takes a moment to take in the apartment, it's as cute as she expected it and then some. Everywhere a posters and cute little nick nacks, a shit ton of books and it's so Lexa. She feels at home immediately.

"I like your place, it's very you. So cute and cosy."

Lexa still doesn't know how to react to compliments, so she just settles for a smile and guides Clarke to the couch in the living room.

"I thought we could order pizza, I'm not really good with cooking well anything so."

"That sounds lovely. There's nothing better than a relaxing evening with a gorgeous woman and pizza."

That earns Clarke a quick kiss to the cheek. Bevor she can react Lexa already vanished from the living room only to return a few moments later with a cold beer in her hand.

"Here I bought this for you. Thought it would help you relax some more."

"God can you get any more perfect than this?"

Clarke takes the bottle out of the brunettes hands, puts it on the table and pulls her beside her.

"Thanks for that, you really are perfect. I'm going to kiss you now okay? Is that okay?"

Lexa's heart stops for a second before pounding in her chest. She closes her eyes, hoping Clarke takes it as the go signal.

Their lips meet, Clarke really tried to make it brief but damn the brunettes lips are so soft so she grabs Lexa's neck and starts kissing her harder. It's one of the best kisses that Clarke shared with someone in her young life but it's shattered when she feels two hands pushing her away. She needs a few moments to compose herself, as she does she wants to ask Lexa what happened but is met with the sight of the brunette rocking back and forth, her arms slung around her knees that are drawn to her chest. Okay something went wrong,really wrong. Clarke knows that this is what a overstimulation looks like but she is at loss at what to do. They never talked about what Lexa would need in this situation but she knows better than to touch her. She read online that often makes things even worse.

Clarke has an idea, it's risky and she is unsure whether it will work or not but it's worth a try. In her research of all things that Lexa likes she stumbled upon the soundtrack of one of the girls all time favorite movies, Lord of the Rings. She spent a few hours of listening to the soundtracks as they're surprisingly good. There is this song, right at the beginning of the first movie "Concerning Hobbits" and she starts to hum the melody, hoping to pull Lexa out of her head.

It takes a few repeats of the song but then Lexa's body starts to relax till she's curled up on the couch. An overstimulation always makes her tired and she longs for a short nap. She knows Clarke probably blames herself and she wants to reassure the blonde that everything is alright, it was just too much at once but she needs a few moments to calm herself. When she's ready Lexa sits up, she considers taking Clarke's hand but the woman has been silent the last minutes and has put as much space between them as the couch allows.

"I know you probably think I'm a freak and I get it you know. It's okay if you want to leave now, I wouldn't hold it against you."

Of all the things Clarke thought that Lexa would say this definitely wasn't on her mind. She knows that she should have been more careful, that she did too much too quickly without giving the brunette time to adjust. The fault is on her and even now Lexa blames herself.

"Oh honey no, it was my fault. I should have stopped but I didn't and it was too much. I'm really sorry."

Lexa looks at Clarke as though she's grown a second head. This woman really is something else and a warm feeling spreads through her body but there is still a part of her that is weary. Costia was understanding too at the beginning but over time she got annoyed with the slow pace of their relationship.

"Clarke, I know that it's hard being with someone like me, you don't have to sugarcoat it."

"Listen to me and listen to me good. Yeah sure it may be difficult at times but for me it's more important how you make me feel and you make me really happy. I want to explore this relationship between us and I don't give a damn about slow we do this okay? Now how about I make you some hot chocolate and you show me the first movie of Lord of the Rings?"

And just like that things were okay. They both know everything's fresh but if they trust each other and more importantly talk to each other, things could really be okay.

Lexa shows her beautiful smile and even touches Clarke's hand for a second.

"That would be lovely thank you. And you know we could maybe work on the whole touching thing. I just need to get used to it, so you know.."

"Lexa Woods, I like the way you think."

With that Clarke gets up and Lexa follows her into the kitchen for a round of hot chocolate.