BorbMeatball
Écriture
de la lecture
60
Lire des livres
Badges
6Moments
6
BorbMeatball9mthRépondu à BattleTracsThe Devil is a Part-Timer
Kana did not draw her sword. She only stood there looking at the instructor, who was now sweating buckets. He couldn't understand why the hero of Rural was being so petty! He did apologize, and the girl did not get hurt, so he really could not understand why he was being punished!- BorbMeatball1yrRépondu à Homelander69
Yup, Ama is a shapeshifter. When not being a villain, Ama uses a female form.
"I don't think I've ever seen you without Ama, Struan. Where is she?" Eir asks, helping Struan settle in and putting me on the floor of the bedroom. - BorbMeatball1yrRépondu à Zenith_Requiem
Ehh... It's more like the MC transcend the limitations of a definite form as a shapeshifter.
Eir's usual color palette of blue and white is almost the opposite of my red and black one, along with her usual choice of casual clothes contrasting with my more formal and elegant ones. Moreover, my wavy brown hair is about twice as long as hers, as it reaches past my knees in female form, but is short, blonde, and slicked back as a male. - BorbMeatball1yrRépondu à Madeie_Nines
It does seem like that, doesn't it? There's a bit of a backstory to it that I intend to cover
I desperately hope that someday, in the distant future, we will still be able to walk side by side; but by that point, if or when things go wrong, it will be much too late to talk. By then, he won't have much say. Even now, I do my best not to sway him, but there's only one way to be sure of what he truly thinks and feels. - BorbMeatball1yrPosté
Fun story! I am interested in finding out how the two souls thing works out! The take on magic is a bit more unique than other novels as well, which I like. The story is well paced and isn't rushed. I like how the MC advances at a fairly realistic pace given his gifts. However, I would like to see more of how the other characters experience the changes in the MC/Rudra through their reactions, rather than stating how they feel about it. The characters would also benefit from each having a more distinct 'voice' of their own; as right now, they all sound fairly similar in speech. Additionally, a bit more context and comparison for how strong the various warriors and mages are at each rank would help give more meaning to the ranking system. Though, I do like the numerical style as it makes comparison easy. Finally, the style and grammar could be improved. For instance, more imaginative language would help immerse the reader in the story (like in the first chapter, describe Yama and what makes him so scary instead of simply saying he terrified others). Keep it up, author!