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Starling_

Starling_

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Hi! I wrote The Last Storm exactly two years ago and have decided to finish the long winded novel.

2021-03-21 JointGlobal
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  • Starling_
    Starling_3 years ago
    Répondu à HaracasAye

    A little bullying can drive a boy to enact mass extinction.

    Ce livre a été supprimé.
  • Starling_
    Starling_3 years ago
    Répondu à Shadowwolf123987

    Its a long progressive novel, but if you're looking for a good action scene, then I suggest waiting until the main part ( The Weight Of Expectations ) is released. It won't be long, and thanks for reading!

    Ce livre a été supprimé.
  • Starling_
    Starling_3 years ago
    Répondu à Shadowwolf123987

    The storm doesn't always come directly after ten thousand years, but more around that time ( the reason is given much later ). Thats why the villagers are always so scared, because they are never sure when it'll arrive. Thanks for reading :)

    Ce livre a été supprimé.
  • Starling_
    Starling_3 years ago
    Répondu à Mr_Jahee_Elie

    Thank you! The story is a slow burner, but if you want to stick around then enjoy the ride :)

    Ce livre a été supprimé.
  • Starling_
    Starling_3 years ago
    Posté

    So far so good. I have never read cyberpunk before, but this seems true to the genre. There's a few hiccups with the grammatical errors, but this can be tackled with something like Grammarly. So far, it has potential. The dialogues are well written and the book is easy to read through. Keep going!

  • Starling_
    Starling_3 years ago
    Posté

    Top notch style. This doesn’t read like most fanfics would expect to, it has a feeling of originality. At first, I thought this was based on marvel, as I haven’t watched any of the shows, but this was proven false quickly. Having never watched the anime, so I can only assume the authors devotion to the series in order to produce a well-developing story like this. No bad Grammer or style mistakes from what I can make out, and the characters are well defined in first meeting. The novel gives the feeling that something big is going to happen soon, though I am yet to get to that part. Added to my library

  • Starling_
    Starling_3 years ago
    Répondu à Maryam_Zahoor

    When I’m on my pc a little later, I’ll comment under the chapters with the strange dialogue tags and tense switches. Otherwise, your Grammar is quite good. Right now, the beginning was just a lot to take in. To make the story flow better, I would suggest spacing them out, and using more conjunctions ( although, which, but ). Hope this helps

  • Starling_
    Starling_3 years ago
    Posté

    Honest opinion, this story is an open book. The opening chapters don’t seem to flow very well, especially with the dialogues swapping from “ to : every so often. The tenses also become mixed up, and too many characters are show at once, creating confusion. Otherwise, the plot of the novel is being unpacked fast and I like how the author has gone on to address the sci-if genre. It’s good if you ignore the punctuation and style errors.

  • Starling_
    Starling_3 years ago
    Répondu à JoJ

    Ah thanks! Ill make sure to edit this

    Ce livre a été supprimé.
  • Starling_
    Starling_3 years ago
    Posté

    A nice little gem. The premise is intriguing enough to pull you in, and I’ve read far enough to realise that this story is very large. The location mentions along with the empires are thrilling to read through, and give a vibe of the culture. The characters especially are sensible to their role, and act well in the action and motor scenes. The Mc is likeable, along with the band of other side characters. There are a few mistakes here and there, mostly having to do with the punctuation and tense mixup, but this doesn’t disturb the flow of the story. Otherwise, the world seems large and the premise is interesting. This book is going places!