Be Aggressive (Part One)

"It's okay, Bellamy."

It was all I was told when I got back. First from Cyclops, then from Colossus. Even Miss Frost said it, and the thought of that woman finding it in her to try and be understanding to me, of all people, made me feel ill.

I was pissed - obviously.

I was pissed because we failed.

These weirdos who came out of nowhere got away from us and took Quire. What they wanted him for, I didn't know, nor did I care. It was the fact they got him at all that irked me.

I was pissed because Sofia got hurt on my watch.

Her injuries weren't severe, thankfully. Josh had been able to heal her on the spot, but that wasn't the point. I was fine with me getting hurt, seeing as how it was always my stupid plans we were enacting. This time, Sofia had gotten hurt specifically because I'd sent her off to get Jay back by herself.

More than anything else though, I was pissed because for the third goddamn time, we got fucked over by Jay.

Two previous times, his bullshit nearly got me and/or people close to me killed, and I'd let it slide. He'd always come off as thoughtful and a bit sullen. But in hindsight, it didn't seem like he held much stock in the people around him, even those on his team. He always kept to himself, even when they tried to include him. He acted like he was alone against the world, when I knew for a fact his friends had done their best to respect his reclusiveness, yet make sure he knew that he was always welcome.

He'd had so many to rely on at school. He had a brother and sister on the senior staff. Another sister was a younger student. The entire New Mutants student squad supported him, as well as their advisor Dani Moonstar. He had Sooraya as well, who went out of her way to try and reach him.

And what did he do? When he started questioning God's will, and his place in the world, he turned to a known anti-mutant leader; a known mutant-killer. All because he fed Jay's sense of self-loathing. Why? Because he was a reverend and they had religion in common? Nightcrawler was a literal fucking priest!

And after his little association with Stryker got a bunch of students killed, he ran! He ran and got himself caught by some doctor who got him hooked on some green crap that made him super-strong and gave him delusions of grandeur. He then fled back into the arms of his captor for another fix, and left his 'friends' at the mercy of some bad guys

I tried to do it Sooraya's way, the peaceful way, because I understood. I personally might have had an issue with Jay after his first fuckup, but she forgave. David, Sofia, Nori, Josh, and Laurie all forgave him. They just wanted their friend to be okay. None of them would have been okay with using force on him, even if I'd ordered it. That was fine. That just meant the next time I went after him; they weren't along for the ride. If we ever got another crack at him, I was going to bring the most no-nonsense, callous members of the team with me that I could, because from there on out, it was on-sight.

Three strikes, and you're out. Whether it was right or wrong to be so angry at him, I couldn't help it. It was a good thing Jay had fantastic healing abilities, because the next time I saw him they were going to get a fucking workout.

I stayed in a foul mood all through classes the next day. By the time I sat down at my table during lunch, I had run through all the ways I would beat the piss out of Jay if I could get my hands on him. So engrossed was I, that I'd forgotten to get any food.

While all of my friends present had noticed, Cessily was the first to point it out, "Uh, Bel? Laura says you haven't eaten since yesterday," She said, pointing out my lack of a meal.

I let out a grunt, preferring to nourish myself with thoughts of vengeance, "Don't need to eat, Cess. Sunlight works just fine."

"What are you, a fucking ficus?" Julian remarked. A sharp look shut down his attempt to start any static for frivolity's sake, "Jesus. Okay, Marcher. Are you really that pissed about yesterday?"

Seeing as how I had been able to feel the depths of the scowl on my face since we'd flown back to school, the answer should have been obvious.

"I'm surprised you're not more pissed about yesterday," I said, "My call almost got Sofia hurt," The last time I checked, Julian was dating her.

The cocky telekinetic scoffed, "Sof can take care of herself. If I'm pissed about anything, it's about you not putting me on the team," He said with a smug grin.

He had a point. Then again, I'd tried to do things the nice way, more carrot than stick. Well, from here on out, it was going to be all stick with Jay and his new buddies.

"Well, the next time around, you're in," I told Julian. There wasn't going to be much diplomacy after the last time we tried being understanding and passive. I turned my attention to the one at the table my decision likely affected the most, "I'm sorry, Sooraya. I know you tried, but..."

"It is alright, Bellamy," Sooraya replied. Her body language seemed defeated by the reminder of how everything transpired, "You let me try. I just... couldn't reach him."

And she'd tried. The New Mutants had tried. Sam Guthrie had tried. So many people had tried. They made a real effort. They cared about Jay. That, maybe, was what pissed me off the most.

I wanted to reach out to her and put a hand on her, but she was pretty traditional in her beliefs, and wasn't much for being touched by dudes, "No one could. You didn't do anything wrong."

Seriously, what more could I have asked for, other than her clocking him in the head right off the bat? And even if we had, we still would have had to fight to get Jay and Quire's container out of there anyway. Pretty much nothing would have changed.

Santo let out a grunt as he chewed his food. For some reason, despite not needing to eat, he and Cessily often got food for themselves, "So there's more freaks to deal with, just like that Fault Zone girl and that Brigade monster," He said with his mouth full.

Cessily sighed and leaned her cheek onto her hand, "I don't think any of us have the high ground to call anyone a freak, Santo."

"You weren't out there to see, Cess," Santo argued in return, "And Marcher and Soo ran into three more of 'em. I don't even want to know what those guys were like."