What Is Life.

Everything starts somewhere.

Nobody avoids a beginning. It doesn't matter how rich you are, how much luck you have, or how much you try to avoid change. 

Amaia learned from an early age that change was inevitable.

There was no use running from forces you couldn't stop. You adapted, you changed, and you did everything possible to survive. 

It was a rainy day.

Rare for California and Amaia knew the good omen would turn bad quickly.

She had a gut-wrenching, thought gripping, feeling.

"Emory, Leo wake up, we're going to be late", she weakly whispered as she extended her left arm to shake and ruffle them, however, it did little to rouse them from their sleep. The heat they emitted provided a deep sense of comfort, the kind you got from a shared bond of trust that made you feel like you could do anything, be anything. 

She walked off the bed and tripped over the two idiots on the floor. It was a recurring problem- waking up and having her idiotic friends on her floor, thinking it was a good idea to sleep at the bottom of the bed.

"Goddamn it guys, this happens every single time. Learn to, like, critically think". 

The two bodies barely shifted. They simply leaned back into each other and continued to snuggle. 

"Liam, Kato wake the fuck up! How did I become the mom of the group? The fact I'm the responsible one should be a warning you're all beyond saving", exasperation was present in her voice but the undertone of fondness followed. 

The sound of the door across from her room opening caused Amaia to get back up. She jumped over the two on the floor and ran to open her door.

She smiled at Maren as she ran past her to the bathroom. Maren winked back as Amaia reached the bathroom door and covered her ears.

5 seconds later, an air horn was blown. 

Shouts and curses were heard as the rest of the household finally woke up. 

Amaia wasted no time in hopping in the shower. The house was a 'fixer-upper' and required a lot of work. 1.5 bathrooms were present for the 7 people that lived there. Mornings were a modern-day hunger game consisting of blackmail, threats, and bribes in order to get to the shower- and hot water first.

Hopping into the shower, Amaia lamented on the new day. It was raining after months of drought so she had to pull out her winter clothes from the bottom of her drawer. She had an exam that the professor had set up to ensure every student in the class failed, had to force Liam to fix the leaky ceiling in her room and get Elian to actually leave his room today. 

At this point, she felt like she was the 'mom' of the group. Dubiously concerning considering the fact she had homicidal tendencies- on a good day.

And her intrusive thoughts manifested into reality more often than they should've. 

"Amaia get out of the shower, at this rate there's going to be no hot water left for the rest of us!", Maren shouted as she banged against the door.

"I'm coming! I'm coming! These showers are never long enough".

Maren swung the door open and nodded her head in agreement.

"I know right? 5 minutes isn't enough time to masturbate. Like I need at least 10 minutes and a good smutty scene vivid in my mind"

"Filter Maren. Filter! I don't need to know everything about you so please for the love of everything good and holy don't tell me how you desecrate our SHARED shower."

Maren rolled her eyes as she walked into the bathroom. 

"It's a natural process. I live with 6 hot people that refuse to acknowledge their feelings for each other but still continue to exlude sexual tension.

"None of us like each other like that Maren. We're all fucked up enough that we can relate to each other on shit other people usually can't. We have familial love, that's it. Trauma bonding and all that."

"Ah, denial. Every single one of you guys are in denial. Whatever, I'll just be here waiting until you guys realize you're all stupid."

"Maren, go take your shower. It's too early to deal with you".

Maren cackled as Amaia closed the door and breathed out a sigh of exasperation. 

Reaching her room, she noticed only Emory and Liam remained. 

"You guys should be getting ready. We are not going to be late again. Do you know how awkward it is to walk into a lecture room while the professor is already talking?"

"Yeah, yeah poor Amaia can't deal with attention".

"Fuck off Emory."

"Love you too."

Amaia flipped her off as she brushed past. Emory only laughed and glided out, pleased she was capable of making Amaia annoyed.

"Are you staying to watch me get dressed?"

Pink tickled Liam's cheeks as Amaia's brown eyes weighed him down. 

"No-"

Amaia didn't let him finish his sentence. She dropped her towel and walked to her dresser. A black band tee and cargo pants were the prepped choice. Lazy but cute. The big puffy jacket she had to pull out was at the back of someone's closet. She just had to figure out who's.

Liam's head was tilted torward the ceilings. The pink had faded into red and he was muttering quietly under his breath.

"I'm done. You can look now. Your eyes are saved from my unholiness".

Looking back down, his green eyes seemed to bear into her. Almost as if he was making sure she was there?

As quick as his gaze came, it disappeared. He smiled and tried to sound contrite.

"Maia, you have got to stop tainting my delicate eyes. How will I ever get anywhere if I'm marked by the sin of lust".

"Doesn't seem that bad", Amaia answered, going along with his play. 

"Ha, on the contrary. Foster homes 2 and 5 really emphasized the importance of living sinless".

As he talked he walked toward her, not stopping until he was close enough to hug her. 

Tentatively, he reached out and embraced her in his arms.

They stood there, basking in their shared silence. 

"Are you ok", he whispered into her ear, not noticing how she slightly shivered as his breath fanned around her neck

"I'm better than yesterday, but worse off than last week. Years off from getting off suicide watch"

"Don't joke about that Amaia, please as far as your jokes can go, don't venture into a topic that hits us that close"

"I'm sorry its just-"

"Hitting you more today?'

"Yeah", she muttered, but it was muffled into Liam's hoodie. 

"We could always-"

"No"

"Ok", he quietly said. He wanted to say more, but he knew not to push, especially when she was not feeling her best. 

"Get ready", Amaia muttered as she pulled away. The moment was gone as she moved around and refused to make eye contact.

"I am ready", Liam said as he looked himself up and down

"Dude you're in pajama pants and a hoodie."

"Yea like I said I'm ready."

He smiled at her and gave one last worrying glance before walking out. 

The silence that stayed spoke of volumes better left unsaid.