Whispered Moments

It's been a year since I left Los Angeles. A year since I tried to close the door on everything—on him. Liam. I tell myself I'm over it. Over him. I've built a new life here with Jia, my best friend, and even made some new friends. Minho and his twin brother, Haruto. Twins. Cool, right? Life feels normal… almost.

But the nightmares haven't stopped. If anything, they've gotten worse.

Last night, I saw it again. My biological father, on his knees, begging Liam for his life. Swearing. Crying. And then Liam… Liam ended it. And me? I locked myself in a room, feeling… relieved. No, more than that. I was happy. Like some kind of psychopath.

I hated my father. I hated what he did to me. But I never thought his death would make me feel… free. The memory disgusts me. Not because of Liam, but because of me. How could I feel that way? How could I be so selfish? So cruel? I hate myself for it.

I woke up gasping, tears streaming down my face, the weight of the dream crushing me. My lungs burned as I searched for air, my body trembling. And then… his name escaped my lips in a whisper.

"Liam."

I wanted to scream. I wanted to hate myself more than I already did. Why couldn't I let go? Why did he still have this hold on me? Even after everything he did, after everything I told myself, I still loved him. And I hated that I did.

When the sun rose, I forced myself out of bed, trying to shake off the remnants of the nightmare. Dad was leaving for work when I walked into the kitchen. He owned a small restaurant nearby, serving lunch and dinner.

"Good morning, kiddo," he said, leaning down to kiss my forehead. "See you tonight. Bye."

"Good morning. See you later," I replied, my voice steadier than I expected. He left, and Grandma handed me a bowl of rice with side dishes she'd prepared.

"Eat up, Surin. You'll need your energy for school."

I nodded, eating quickly before heading out. The cool morning air helped clear my mind, but not entirely. By the time I reached university, Minho was already there. He always was. Leaning against a wall near the entrance, he looked up and waved as I approached.

"Hi," I said, trying to sound cheerful.

"Hey," he replied, his eyes narrowing slightly as he studied me. "You look tired."

I paused, forcing a smile onto my face. "I slept late last night."

He didn't press further, for which I was grateful. We walked into class together, and the day passed in a blur. Lecture after lecture, notes scribbled hastily, conversations I barely processed. Before I knew it, the sun was dipping low, and the campus began to empty.

I found Jia sitting alone on a bench near the long plum tree in the courtyard. Her shoulders were hunched, her head bowed. As I approached, I noticed her eyes glistening. She'd been crying. My chest tightened.

"Jia?" I asked softly, sitting beside her. She quickly wiped her eyes, forcing a shaky smile onto her face.

"Hey," she said, her voice light but brittle.

"What happened?"

"Nothing," she replied too quickly, shaking her head. "I'm fine."

She wasn't fine. I could see it. I could feel it. And I couldn't ignore it. So, I did the one thing I promised myself I wouldn't do unless absolutely necessary. I read her mind.

The images hit me instantly. Words. Laughter. Cruel, mocking faces. The teasing had gone too far, and the others joined in. It was too much. Jia didn't deserve that.

Anger bubbled in my chest. I clenched my fists, trying to keep my voice steady. "Jia, I…"

She looked at me, her smile faltering. "Really, I'm okay," she said, her voice breaking slightly.

But she wasn't. And neither was I.