Chapter 4 - Dreams

[Talent: Golden Voice]

[Your voice has been blessed by the divine. Passively increases Voice by 70%. On command, allows the singer to activate the Talent: Golden Voice. When active; increases Voice and Charisma by 400%; reduces vocal interference by 50%; increases singing stability by 70%. WARNING! Activating Golden Voice rapidly drains Endurance and Fortitude. Purchasing this Talent unlocks the Voi Stat.]

[Cost: 400 Streamer Points]

I stare long and hard at the screen. A battle rages in my head.

One side is desperately trying to pull me away from buying it. Why do you even need this, it asks. You're not a singer. Focus on something else. Buy a Talent that actually makes you better, it pleads.

The other side is reminded of my old dream. Of when I wanted to be a musician of any sort, but just didn't have the talent. Of how crushed I felt when I realized that there wasn't a single musical bone in my body. It was the first time I learnt not to hope, lest I open myself to be poisoned.

Well,

The choice was clear from the start.

...

"Hey everyone, I'm back."

Machigako: Hello Aiko-chan!

Kurusu-kun: Good evening!

Neko11137: Aiko pretty today too

Lelolelolelo: *kiraaaaaaaa*

Palieko: Hail Aiko-sama!

John4_4: What're we doing today?

I smile. Seeing the chat fill up so quickly—it's something I could've never imagined months before. "We don't have a plan today, John-san." I hum. "We could do a game of Minecraft. Or some Osu maybe? Or," I grin. "We can do something else today?"

Neko11137: Aiko special?

Lelolelolelo: Yes yes yes yes

Machigako: Aiko special, one serving pls!

I smile. "Seems like everyone wants to try something else." I make a show of pulling out a small stack of paper from the side. "You see, I was looking through some stuff when I stumbled on some music from the West." I lean forward, my smile excited yet nervous. "I want to try singing them today."

Machigako: Aiko-chan's singing!?

Kurusu-kun: Sing!!!!

Neko11137: Aiko gonna sing?

Lelolelolelo: Awesomeeeeeeee

Palieko: Aiko-sama will grace us with her voice today!?

John4_4: YEEEESSSSS

The chat turns into a blur as hundreds of agreements flood through in seconds. I laugh. "It won't be anything special. It'll just be me singing with some karaoke I pulled from Utube."

I set up a randomizer to pick what songs I'll be singing. Funnily enough, the first one that gets chosen is Country Roads. Which-, well, it's the first song I've ever sang myself. Didn't do all that great. Although maybe I'm just remembering it wrong—I sang it when I was five or something.

But it'll be a good test.

Today will be a test of how much impact Golden Voice will have. Passively increasing my singing ability by 70% sounds grandiose enough. But the active portion of the Talent sounds insane.

I'll be saving the latter for the final songs, though. I have no plan on collapsing mid-stream.

A Utube video is played, and the slow guitar begins to play as I take a breath. 

The first note comes, and I sing.

I don't look at the chat. Nor do I look at the lyrics on the video. I close my eyes, and everything else fades but the guitar and my own voice. 

Minutes pass. I sing along to the guitar strings. I feel my throat straining from the unusual tones I'm making, but I push through. 

Then, the strings die down. The Utube video ends, and all is silent as I open my eyes. And the chat-

Machigako: Aiko-chan's so good!

Kurusu-kun: More!

Neko11137: Aiko sing good

Lelolelolelo: Yoooooooooo

John4_4: THAT WAS SO GOOD

It takes all my willpower not to break down and cry at that point. It's dumb—I'm getting validation about my singing ability from people on the internet, a Talent I purchased from some invisible force capable of granting me abilities beyond human comprehension, all the while living in a seemingly magical world.

But the dream of that young me is slowly being fulfilled, and the warmth is almost overwhelming.

I droop slightly. "Thank you for the kind words, everyone." I smile. "Let's continue on, yeah?"

More songs are picked. Fancy, I Hope You Dance, All I Want for Christmas Is You—most of the songs I picked are old songs, just in case I get slapped with copyright or whatever. They might be foreign songs, but Japan is notoriously cagey about any intellectual property.

Through it all, Golden Voice is there to guide me. Even without its active ability, it's like there's some unseen force guiding my voice, helping me keep stable even as my chest goes tight from panic. 

And then, the last song from the randomizer is done. A tired breath is taken, but my chest is still tight.

The chat is filled with viewers asking for an encore, and with a somewhat tired smile, I type in one last song into the list.

Inochi no Kiraware Teiru. Hated by Life Itself. I didn't pick this song at first—it just isn't my style.

But I found the song stored in the computer, tucked between a few other songs. 

I realized that this was a song Aiko liked. 

And I'm not one to psycho-analyze Aiko from just this song alone, but knowing the untimely fate the girl felt, the past she'd undergone, the memories she left behind—the picture it paints isn't kind.

I take a breath. "This one's a little different." I admit. "I had a…friend once. She liked this song, I think." The chat slows, as if enraptured. I take a breath to calm my growing panic. "This is an ode to her."

Suzuki Aiko is not my friend. We never got the chance to meet. But, with no question, I know her better than anyone I've ever known in my life.

The slow piano plays. 

My eyes close.

Golden Voice activates.

And I sing.

Immediately I can feel my voice change. It becomes richer, more stable, and notes I thought were impossible to reach are suddenly attainable with only a little strain. I can also feel the exhaustion pile onto me like there is no tomorrow. It almost feels like someone's choking me as I sing.

But my voice doesn't falter. The notes come clear. 

And when the last line comes, I put in what energy I have left to belt out the final notes of the song. It's a melody more beautiful than anything I've ever heard before, and it almost feels wrong to realize that I'm the one that's singing.

Then the song ends. 

I open my eyes slowly. Everything is blurry, and I can barely see the chat explode with hundreds of comments. "I'm a little tired now," I smile. "Thank you for listening everyone. I'm-, I'm gonna go sleep now."

I end the stream, and I fall unconscious right after.

...

"That was…"

"Amazing, wasn't it?" Tanigo Motoaki—better known as Yagoo by his employees—smiles as the stream ends. "She's an incredible talent," He laughs. "And an untrained one."

A-chan nods. She lifts her glasses as she wipes her eyes. "That last song was incredible." She frowns. "So, you think she is like us?"

"I can't be sure, but I think so."

A-chan smiles. "Is it your famed intuition again?"

Yagoo laughs. "Perhaps.

...

Kson laughs as she chugs down another can of beer.

"Aa, that was so good!" She grins as she leans back into her couch. "You're really cool, Aiko-chan."

She sighs. A small trail of smoke rises from the ashtray on the table she's resting her legs on. The wisps rise and twist and spin as they disappear. Only the dull sizzling punctuates through the silence.

"Really cool."

Her chest hurts. Nearly a month before, when she took Aiko-chan out for a little date to an izakaya she often went to—she'd felt more alive than she had in months. Just going out with another Streamer, eating and drinking; it'd been a while since she last did that.

And to now watch Aiko-chan belt out in front of thousand of viewers, to see someone she now called a friend show just how talented she is-

Kson smiles. "I think you'll like her, Kanata-chan."

...

"You look like you need a day off."

I scoff. "Oh, do I?" The can hisses as I crack it open. "What gives that away?"

She raises her hand in defeat. "Chill, girl, chill. Tuck that sarcasm for another day, yeah?" Her elbow gives me a playful nudge. "Come on! We're going to relax today. Watch some Vtubers and stuff!"

"Vtubers…?" My thoughts stall for a good moment. "Ah, that anime thing you got into last month?"

"They're not anime, it's-, ugh." She rolls her eyes. "They're real people. They just use avatars and stuff."

"Uhuh." The television lights up. "So, like, what do they do?"

"Oh, a bunch of stuff. They play games, they talk, they sing—you know, all the good stuff."

My smile strains for a moment. Playing games, talking, singing-

"Sounds like a pretty good life." I admit. "I mean, compared to the shit we do everyday…"

"Mm, I'm not sure about that. Being so open on yourself, putting yourself out as a product for people to consume-" She turns to me, and her smile looks almost teasing. "I mean, you know how that feels, don't you, Jo-"

My eyes snap open.

I groan as I sit up. I…don't feel too good. My throat hurts, and my head hurts even more. It almost feels like I just got my face smashed in by a jackhammer or something.

I frown. I feel like I'm forgetting something, though I don't know what.

I shake my head. 

[Today's Stream Rating: S!]

[Tallying Stream Points:

+10 (Stream Rating: S)

+5 (Amazing Stream!)

+5 (Karaoke Stream!)

+10 (Emotional Stream!)

+1 (Stream Duration: +1 hours)

+4 (Added new 'Lore' to the Streamer's Character)

+1 (New Viewer)

+4 (10 New Viewers)

+8 (50 New Viewers)

+10 (>1000 Concurrent Viewers!)

+5 (Streamer branched into new Community: Vocaloid Fans)

+5 (Streamer branched into new Community: Doujin Circle Fans)

Total Stream Points: 68]

"...wow." An awkward smile lifts my lips. "Those are some insane numbers."

I mean, like, damn. Over a thousand concurrent viewers, a Rating of S, two new communities I got introduced into—it's no wonder why this stream's pay-out is nearly thrice my usual pay.

I'm not sure I'll be doing something like this again in a while, though. Karaoke streams are fine, but using Golden Voice literally caused me to black out. Until I've raised my End and For enough, I won't be using Golden Voice for anything but ending a stream.

I give the Streamer Store a quick scroll. I don't have many Streamer Points at the moment—just over a hundred—but I'm sure there's something I can purchase to bolster my For. 

I don't find anything. Even the cheapest Talent that increases my For in any way is over 200 Points.

…Oh well.

I look at the time. It's 4:42 a.m.; a good few hours before I'd normally wake up. It's barely sunrise outside, with only the barest threads of orange painted over the dark sky.

You know what, I think I'll take a jog for once. 

Yeah. Let's do that.