A white lie

"Nothing worth mentioning I guess"? I took a deep breath and smiled nonchalantly at Esha. The thing was that the three of us were not particularly fans of confrontations and fights but at the same time we did not cower away from showing people what happened when they messed with us. How do I explain it?

My peace of mind overshadowed my need to prove my point. I despised explaining myself to people just so I could get into their good books. If someone didn't like me I could not care less and I was more than happy to let them think of me as a bad person. Sometimes, I felt like I had some ulterior hatred for people where I could not stand them but then I also had two friends whom I trusted and loved to a very considerable extent.

Ajwad was the most mature and sensible out of the three of us. He had chocolate brown eyes and jet black hair which gave off a very delinquent look but he was the opposite of a troublemaker. I mean, the guy was studious and intelligent and you could guess that I am not the brightest of the crayons so I thanked God that I had a friend who was always good at studies. Esha was extremely good with the numbers and sometimes I did ask God, how come I became friends with two geniuses. The combination of subjects that we had to study were terrible. I mean, who the hell studies Literature and Law in Engineering? If that's the case then where is the painting class? That made zero sense to me but then again, Our College Principal's ramble about how "Art is necessary" for engineers and doctors also flew above my head. I am sure Art includes painting too Mr. Roy.

I was only good at painting and eating off people's brains. I didn't understand why I had to read about Shakespeare's awful poetry and note that Romeo and Juliet was the most horrible play ever. Ajwad and Esha would disagree with me on this.

But then they also disagreed with me when I said Friends' was a legendary show and nothing could ever match up to its level. Whenever, we used to watch it together they would start their commentary on how i met your mother deserved more hype than this tasteless show.

I mean, How I met your mother was another one of my favorites but let's not get to the part where the ending was a shit show. Some people did like the ending but I am certainly not one of them.

"Are you guys sure?" Esha narrowed her eyes in a very motherly way and looked at us with worry etched on her beautiful face.

Ajwad laughed in a rich voice and ruffled her hair, "When will you let go of your motherly instincts?" He was right, If Ajwad was the most mature then Esha was the most caring and sensitive out of us.

She just could not stand people walking all over her friends. I mean, did I just tell you how angelic my friends are? I hope it isn't the thousandth time I'm saying that.

We were still standing like fools outside her class when one of the guys from our class whose name was Edward came near us and fist bumped Ajwad and nodded at Esha and me. "Yo bro, you up for a game of football with us"? He gestured back to the pack of his friends who hooted wolfishly at Ajwad.

"I don't think now is the-

Esha and I cut him mid-sentence, "No, he isn't actually, Edward Cullen" After saying this we both looked at each other in amazement because oh boy the synchronization was pretty brilliant.

He looked at us with a horrifying expression on his face, "I hate Robert Pattinson!" His friends started laughing hysterically and Ajwad just shook his head as if this didn't amuse him.

"We have plans today, maybe take a rain check?" Esha chimed in and hooked her arms with ours before dragging us away from there. Ajwad just smiled at Edward in a very apologetic manner before letting Esha take us with her.

"I think we should energize ourselves by eating something before the mid exams"? Ajwad said with a serious tone and rotated us to the direction of the cafeteria. Esha made a disappointing face, "I thought we were going to watch Spider-man: No way home today?"

Did I tell you that she was an enthusiastic fan of Tom Holland and her room was filled with pictures of him. She made it her mission to watch every YouTube video which had the name "tom holland" in its title.

"I'm not really in the mood to eat greasy burgers or watch a movie whose ending I can predict before even watching" I said to both of them.

Ajwad frowned at me, "Is everything okay?" No, I wanted to scream that nothing was okay. My world was falling apart and there was not even a single thing I could do to avoid that but there were no words inside me. There were only screams and I was afraid I would not stop screaming if I opened up to them so I bottled up everything inside me like always.

"Yeah, I just have to go to the administration office before I go home" I smiled at them. Esha looked at me in a very caring way, "Looks like I won't get to see tommy today. It's okay we can watch it at home next weekend"

Ajwad laughed, "That's such a horrible nickname for him. It's like you are naming your dog" So she had a habit of giving her crushes nicknames. Finn Wolfhard was Finny and Timothee Chamalet was Timmy.

I shook my head and hugged them both, "See you losers tomorrow"

Ajwad looked at his watch, "How will you come back if you are not taking the bus now"? Oh, damn yes.

Both of my friends knew how to drive so they brought their own cars. I did have one too but I had an irrational fear of driving. Let's not get into the details of this.

"We'll wait for you" Esha said caringly. I knew she had to get home and help out her sister Huda for her exams. They were really close and Esha considered it her responsibility to take care of her. I couldn't ask her to stay, that would be selfish.

I also knew that Ajwad had to go home and study for the upcoming exams, "I will call my brother as soon as I get free. You both shoo away to your homes" I told them with finality.

Ajwad shook his head, "Last time when you gave this excuse you ended up having a concussion" He was talking about our high school farewell. At that day I very proudly told my friends that they didn't have to worry about me as my brother must have been on his way to pick me up. I mean, he did promise me that he would pick me up as soon as he gets freed from his football practice. I kept calling him and the call went to voicemail.

I was the only one left in college and my clothes didn't help me at all as I was dressed as a princess and my dress was awfully glittery and I am sure I looked like a clown.

I decided to go home by foot without giving thought to the fact that I had no sense of directions and the only thing I knew was that it was 45 minutes away.

The security guard gave me a pitiful glance and went back to eating oranges. I mean, he could've offered me one instead of giving me his sympathy. I loved oranges, they were just so delicious. I made sure to give him my furious glance before stomping away.

The minute I stepped outside the gate I fell face down and do not ask me why I have a deviated septum now.

"He forgot last time and I promise I'll go on uber this time if he doesn't respond" I was very sure that he wouldn't answer.

They both looked at me as if they didn't believe a thing I just said but they didn't insist any further. Thank God.

After a lot of reassurance that I would get home safely they decided to leave me alone. To be very honest, I did not have any work in the administration office. Today, I had an appointment with my college psychologist. I had been avoiding this for what feels like an eternity but now I felt like I had to get help otherwise I would go mad.