The famous dark bridge in the city.

My mom stood up from her chair holding her chest with her right hand while holding the chair with her left hand. She looked so pale that I thought she might faint any moment now.

"Y-you're what-"

"GAY. Yeah, you heard it right. I. AM. G-"

Before I could complete my sentence, mom slapped me right across the face.

"Aaagh!" It was so damn painful.

The second I looked straight at mom's eyes, I turned and lowered my head in fear. Her eyes looked like they were about to pop out from her eye sockets.

I've never seen my mom that angry ever in my life before. I still kept my cool and acted like the slap didn't bother me at all but deep down I was scared to the core of my back bone.

She might blame me, shout at me a lot but she had never raised her hand at me before. 'Wow I really pissed her off this time, huh?..'

"I-I can't, oh my lord, why..." After taking some heavy breaths, she heaved a long sigh and turned her back on me and talked with my brother.

He had been standing there while the whole thing happened but he didn't seem to be surprised at all.

"Lucy, go to your room." She said, while taking heavy breaths.

While mom had her back turned on me, I took heavy loud steps and stormed off to my room angrily because I didn't want to make things worse.

_________________________

I closed the door shut with a loud thud and dropped on the bed like a dead fly. I hugged my side pillow and tears started to flow down from my cheeks to the pillow.

It was normal for me to cry a lot in this household. Mom always made me feel miserable. School used to be my happy place but not anymore.

Recently, a rumor had started about me all because I helped one of my friends thinking that she was a good person. Turns out, she is a snake who stabbed me behind my back.

Because of the rumor, everyone at school is giving me the 'bOmBAstiC siDE eYE' and glares at me looking like they are disgusted by my presence.

I didn't even want to go to school anymore but I knew mom would never let me stay at home. After crying for several minutes, I just laid on the bed and stared at an empty space.

'For how long am I gonna have to bear all this pain? No one cares about me. My brother always makes me insecure and feel like I'm worthless and he is better than me.

Mom on the other hand, is using me for HER ambitions, she wants me to fulfil her dreams, she doesn't even know what MY ambition is.

She doesn't know my favourite colour, she doesn't know my favourite food, she doesn't know anything about me nor she cares about me.

She makes me feel like I'm a failure and a mistake she didn't expect. She makes me feel like I'm the worst and that I should have never be born to be her child.'

I flinched when I heard loud bangs on the door and my brother yelling at me to come out. I quickly wiped all my tears and opened the door to see him glaring at me as always.

"What do you want?" I asked and he shook his head vigorously saying, "What can I even get from you? You are useless. I'm ashamed to even call you my sister, YUCK!"

"Is that why you're here? To remind me I'm garbage?"

"No, I don't want to insult the trash cans. Shut up and come with me downstairs, mom and DAD is waiting for you."

"WHAT!" My eyes widened. "Oh.My.God. Did you tell him that I'm gay!?"

"I didn't but I don't know about mom. Let's go."

Saying that, he grabbed my arm and dragged me downstairs. As we went down, I could see mom wasn't even looking at me. Dad on the other hand, was smiling warmly as always.

He was the only one that made me feel good. He was the only one in this world, who made me feel loved and cared about.

I guessed mom hadn't told him anything. Inside my mind, I thanked her A LOT for that. The four of us, me, my brother, mom and dad sat around the dinner table.

We had salad, chicken and a some sort of luxurious soup. When we just started to eat, everyone was silent unlike usual.

Dad noticed that there was something wrong and looked confused for a second before talking.

"Guys? Children? What's going on? what's wrong? why is everyone so silent??"

He then turned to mom and asked while holding her hand, "Honey, what's wrong?" Mom turned her back on dad before uttering, "Nothing.."

'Please mom, don't tell him, I'll do anything just don't tell dad at least not now. Oh god, please don't, just don't.' I prayed and prayed.

By now I could see none of us were eating except my brother, he was like that always. He didn't care about anything that happened around him. I had lost my appetite by now.

As my dad kept pleading for an answer, my mom kept her back turned to dad.

"DAD! Don't force her, it's nothing. We're all fin-"

"Gay."

Suddenly, my mom blurted out, cutting me off and making my eyes widen again.

'NO..'

"What, honey? I- I think I, misheard you."

To my absolute horror, mom turned to dad with tears in her eyes and said in a loud voice, "GAY! Your daughter, Lucy is, GAY." She then started to sob while burying her head in her palms.

"N-no, dad I- no.."

Dad's gaze fell upon me and the look of horror in my dad's eyes made me want to throw up and cry and scream.

"Is this true, Lucy?"

"No, dad listen, I-"

"LUCY. Are you gay? yes or no?"

Dad has never raised his voice at me ever before. I never lied to him. Even if I lied, how long can I keep lying.. one day, I have to tell him.

I let that one day be today so I stopped running anymore and faced my fear. I took a heavy breath. 'inhale.. exhale..' Closed my eyes and opened them then opened my mouth to speak.

"Yes, dad. I AM gay." In the end of my sentence, I felt a sharp pain in my heart as if a tiny sharp knife had stabbed my heart, right in the middle.

Dad turned so pale and he looked like he was about to faint, which he DID. HE FAINTED. He fainted backwards dramatically, making the chair also collaps on the floor with him.

The chair broke and the three of us stood up from our chairs in sync. Mom rushed to him and started sobbing even louder. My brother on the other hand, was calling an ambulance.

My heart started pounding in my chest as I lept forward to see dad but mom suddenly turned into a monster and screamed from her throat. She yelled me to stay away from dad and sobbed while holding dad's unconscious body.

I could feel tears started to stream down my eyes as I ran towards my room. I locked the door, dropped on the bed like before and sobbed my heart out.

It was hard for me to breath because I cried so much. I've never cried like that in my life before. Suddenly, like thunder had struck me, my eyes flung open and I decided to run away from home.

I went out from the back door of my house and started to run like a maniac without an aim. Everyone's words, death glares, and everything that happened, flashed before my eyes.

"DIE! DIE! DIE!" I felt like something in me also blamed me and told me to end this pain once and for all. As I kept running, I saw a bridge. The dark bridge that was known for the place of most suicides that happened in the city.

It was like as if death itself was inviting me. Everything started going through my mind again like in a movie. I stopped running and walked slowly towards the bridge.

There were vehicles on the road but this was the busiest hour in the city. Even though there were lights on the road, where I was standing was so dark. The dim light helped me to find a spot of the bridge.

I climbed on the bridge and looked down, it was so dark down there. Right now that's what I needed. Darkness. I spread my arms. Closed my eyes and a tear fell down from my right eye.

'Here we go, Lucy. End this pain, now.' I took a deep breath and opened my eyes. 'End the pain. End it.' As the cool wind brushed past me, I took one last look at the city and then looked down.

I heaved a long sigh and closed my eyes again. 'This is it.'

I jumped.