CHAPTER 1

It was around July, I was sitting with my bestie in our verandah. Her name is Jennifer and my name is Betty. We stay in a girl's hostel in London and we work as a librarian in a library near our hostel so that we can continue our higher studies. Both of us are a student of St.Xavier's College. She is a student of medicine and I am a swimmer. My dream is to be the head of the swimming clubs of our school. Suddenly a call came from Mario. He called me to inform me that his brother Rio is not answering his calls, he called him several times but his brother didn't receive a single call and asked me to call his roommate Diana and ask her if she knows something about Rio.

Rio and Mario both of them have been my terrific friends since childhood. Every year during the summer we used to visit our farmhouse in Lambeth to spend our vacation. Both of them were my neighbors and their mother Mrs.Tessa Pyer was my mother's best friend. Among all the vacations, the last vacation was the most memorable one for me. Mario was my childhood crush but I was afraid of confessing my feelings to him, I never thought that he would fall in love with me but surprisingly it happened. I was 17 and he was 19 at that time. Our love story is full of fairy tales, adventures, and ups and downs.

It was just a day before Aunt Tessa's birthday and Mario decided to surprise Aunt with a gold bracelet. So, we went to the shop. He asked me to choose one bracelet for her mother. As soon as we came out of the shop it started raining heavily and we got wet while walking to the parking area. As I was wet and feeling uncomfortable he gave me his jacket to comfort me and asked me to wrap it, after a few minutes we reached home. The next morning each one of us gave our gifts to Aunt Tessa. She is happy but after opening Mario's gift she is shocked. We went to a club to celebrate her birthday. After returning home, I thought to go to the pool. In the pool I saw Mario, he was a good swimmer, he was a state-level winner. Seeing him there, I asked him

- Hey, what are you doing here?

- Nothing much, just feeling tired. So, I decided to swim cause it helps me to feel relaxed. What about you?

- Same here.

- So, how is your preparation going for the State-level basketball championship?

- Well!

- Best of luck! I know we will win.

Suddenly he lightened a cigarette. I asked him

- Do you smoke?

- Yeah.

- Are you a daily smoker?

- No.

- Sometimes when I feel stressed.

- But smoking is injurious to health, there must be some other way to stress down. You should leave smoking today.

- Okay! Will try!

After this, I got up from the pool and said to him

- Good night!

- Have a good sleep.

And then I went to my room. The next day morning I called Diana and informed her everything about yesterday night, she told me to propose to Mario before it was too late. I decided to share my feelings about him. I quickly got ready and went to the garden. He was there, sitting and riding a book under a tree. I asked him if I could join him

- May I join you

- Yes, why not?

- Are you reading The Lost Love by Hannah D'souza?

- Yes.

- Nice. Mario, I want to tell you something. I know it sounds a little bit awkward but I like you. I have liked you since childhood but never dared to tell you.

- Betty, it's not possible. You should focus on your match instead of wasting time on these silly things.

I don't know why but I felt very embarrassed. So, I went to my room. That evening we had a party on the beach. There I saw something that I never expected. I saw Mario with a girl both of them were so close, they were kissing each other, seeing I felt so bad and sat in a corner away from everyone. While I was sitting alone and having a beer, a boy named Siu seeing me alone came and asked to join me

- Hey! May I join you?

- Yes. Ofc.

- Why are you sitting alone?

- Cause I don't have anyone to accompany me.

- So, sad of you but don't worry now I am with you.

We talked for an hour. Although I didn't know him I felt like I had known him for a long and he was my true love. I looked into his eyes and after a few seconds, we kissed each other. Both of us were blushing. He asked me to drop home in his car. I accepted his offer and went inside his car. After a few minutes, he dropped me home. I invited him to our pool party tomorrow.

- We have a pool party tomorrow. Would you like to join us?

- Yes. For sure.

- Ok. See you tomorrow. Good night.

- Yes! Sweet dreams.

We gave a good night kiss to each other and I came out of his car and got inside my home.

The next day morning, I quickly got ready for the party and I was super excited to meet Siu. I was sitting over the pool and waiting for him. He suddenly appeared and surprised me. I gave a big smile after seeing him. Then we joined the party, Mario was continuously staring at us though I noticed him still I pretended like I hadn't noticed him at all. We enjoyed ourselves. Suddenly he grabbed my waist and pulled me closer to him, I was drunk and not in a sense at that time. He pulled me and took me to my room. Then he put me on the bed and slowly started coming closer to me. I told him to move away but he didn't listen to me and came closer.

- Siu what the shit are you doing? Please move away from me

- No baby. I want to fuck you.

- No please move away [ in a crying voice]

I tried to seek help but I couldn't as he put his hand on my mouth and I was unable to make any kind of sound. After trying for a long I succeed to pull him away from me, he became more desperate and raped me

- Baby just a few more minutes.

- No please leave me. I beg you.

- It's done. You are now free I cried lying in bed. I told him that he is a rapist and I will punish him for this. Hearing this he became angry and more desperate and started me hitting by his belt. My whole body was paining and many cuts were made it was bleeding, and the bed sheet turned red. After a few minutes, I became quiet and was shivering out of fear. I never thought Siu would do this. He will also do the same thing that my dad tried to do with me when I was a kid. Suddenly, I started crying loudly due to frustration. Hearing my voice outside from my room Mario and Rio asked Siu to open the door but he didn't, so they broke the door and got inside. Seeing me bleeding with cuts and shivering me in pain and fear they quickly gave me their shirts to cover myself. Mario

- How you dare to touch her without her permission?

- No. I asked, and she permitted me.

- You fucking liar.

And started hitting Siu until he started bleeding after this he threw him out of our house

- Get out and never dare to come around her. Or else it will be your last day.

I was sitting in a corner and crying. Mario came with the first aid and sat beside me. He asked me to look in his eyes and told me to cool down

- Betty! Betty, look in my eyes and cool down. Cool. See I am with you, I am with you nothing to worry about, I am with you. Look, Betty, look in my eyes I also love you but I was afraid of sharing it, I was afraid of losing you Betty, I love you, Betty.

I looked into his eyes and noticed love for me. I never thought this would happen. He hugged me tightly and promised to never leave me. Mom and Aunt Tessa came back home after shopping we decided to not tell them about the incidents or else they would get tensed. Then we came down to have our dinner. I normally smiled and talked to them like usual, after dinner we went to our respective rooms to sleep. Everyone slept except me I was sitting on my verandah with a chair. Suddenly, someone knocked on my door, I asked

- Who's there?

- Me Mario.

I ran and opened the door and hugged him, he got inside my room and asked me why I hadn't slept yet

- Why are you not sleeping?

- Nothing.

- OK close your eyes and relax, I am with you! I love you, Betty, never gonna leave your side. Nobody can ever steal you from me, I can destroy the whole world if they make you cry. Your smile is the prettiest thing in this world. "You are mine, it means you are only and only mine."

For the first time, I felt what true love is.

"I felt like I was the most shining star in the empty sky. "

The next day early in the morning he took me on a sunrise date on the beach. I thought only me and Mario were there on the beach but no our family was also there. He knew down and proposed to me

- "Betty, I know nowadays it's hard to maintain a relationship but I will try to give my best if you are with me. We will give 50/50 in the relationship but in your downs, it will make it 80/20 and in my downs, you will make it 80/20. I know it's hard but we will make it. I love you not for a few months or years but forever. I want to become old with you. Would you like to grow old with me?"

Everyone present shouted loudly

- Betty says yes, yes yes!

I was shocked, I felt like I was dreaming, it felt like am in my dreamland but it was reality. I replied Mario

- Yes, yes, yes! I would like to be with you till my end."Hold my hand until the sun completely stops rising and lighting up the sky"

We returned home, a family gathering was arranged to celebrate us. To congratulate you and wish luck with our new beginnings. It all went happily for 2 years and after 2 years I moved to London to complete my higher studies. First few months everything went well, after a few months I got busy with my schedule and was not that much available to communicate with Mario. The conversations became limited and this was not acceptable to Mario, he wanted all my attention which was not possible for me at that time. After 2-3 months Mario shifted to Boston for his studies, there he used to share his room with Diana his roommate. He stopped giving attention to me. Rio told me that he used to be with Diana most of the time.

During my birthday, in the night he called me and asked me to come and meet him outside as he was waiting for me outside the hostel

- Hey Betty! Please come downstairs, I am waiting for you outside your hostel. Come fast it's too cold.

- What? Are you joking? What are you doing here? How did you come? Is this any kind of prank?

- No, no prank! I will explain everything. You just come out for now.

I quickly ran. I saw Mario outside the gate waiting for me I was shocked. I took the gate pass from security and walked to Mario. I got inside him and he took me on a drive. He suddenly stopped his car in front of a small farmhouse that was too old and locked. He broke the door and got inside, then he cleared the room and lit all the candles. He brought a cake for me and asked me to cut it. After the cake-cutting we sat down, he held my hands and told me that he was sorry for his deed

- Betty, if it's possible then please forgive me for my deeds. I don't know what to say but I love you and never wanna lose you.

- Mario it's OK. It's not only your fault but also mine. It was our fault, so now it's our responsibility to make everything as it was before.

He looked into my eyes like he was trying to find something in my eyes. Both of us were lost in our eyes. After some time he came closer to me and held my hands I started breathing heavily, and he asked me

-Are you ready for this?

I replied with a yes.

-Yes I am ready to move one step forward.

Then he came closer to me and laid me down and blew out all the candles.

It was the best memory. That night we promised that we would never leave our sides in any situation, we will make this forever although it's hard to make it forever we will do it. We will together face all the ups and downs. The next morning he dropped me in my hostel and went back to his hostel.

After a few months, we decided to get married and informed our family about it. They were very happy. Everything was okay but Aunty Tessa had a heart attack and was shifted to hospital, we all were worried but slowly started recovering, so we decided to postpone our wedding Aunt Tessa told us to not do so as he wished to see our marriage before she died. Our family started preparing for our marriage, and although Aunt Tessa was not so well at that time still she managed to be present at our wedding finally, our wedding day arrived, and I was wearing a white gown with light makeup and jewelry. I dressed up the way Mario wanted me to be. I was waiting to see Mario as a groom, it was my dream to be her girlfriend but now I am going to be his wife. It all feels like a Dream. I am dreaming I am in my Dreamland but it's not a dream it's reality. I am getting married to Mario my dream prince. "Dreams can be true if you desire to be so, nothing is impossible"

It was 8:30 Mario didn't come, we tried to reach him continuously but he didn't answer any calls. We got worried and thought he might have had an accident and called all the hospitals and police stations and asked them about Mario but they replied that they hadn't seen him. At last, we called the guard of his hostel, he said that Mario left his room a long time ago. I waited for him in the church till 12 but he didn't come. At 12:30 he finally received my call. I asked him

- Why you didn't come? what's the matter? Why did you leave me? What's the reason?

he answered

- It's not possible for me to continue this fake relationship. You are not my type, and I don't want to marry you, I was lonely so I needed someone to make me feel better and you were that someone in my life. I never had any emotional feelings for you, I know it's the wrong time, it's not the right time, it's too late but sorry for that I tried to talk to you before about this but you were not ready. You didn't listen to me. There is a huge difference between liking and loving. I like you but I never loved you. Everything between me and you is just a fling. I don't want to continue this marriage or this relationship and this is our end. I know it might hurt you but it's true. Loving is not that easy you think, it needs feeling which I don't have for you. It will take a long for you to forget all these stuffs but still try to manage. I know you can. Stay happy! Move on! Goodbye!

Then he cuts off the call without listening to me. I don't know what to do now as I was pregnant and having his child in my womb. I left the church quickly and didn't listen to anyone. I was sitting on the beach and crying, as I had no idea about what to do now. Suddenly, Rio came and sat beside me. He put his hand on my head and asked me to calm down.

- Betty I don't know what to say. Am sorry from my brother's side I never thought that he would do this. You know loving is not as easy as we think. Everyone doesn't deserve to be loved cause everyone can't carry it. I love you is easy to say but loving the person for a lifetime is not that easy.

Hearing Rio's words I felt that a small moment is easy to change the whole life. By reading the first fifteen pages of a book we can't understand the whole book for that we need to study the whole book and everyone doesn't have that much patience to read the whole book.

Suddenly, a call came from mom

- Hey! Betty and Rio come to Sizi Hospital as soon as possible. Tessa's health is not well and doctors shifted her to the ICU.

Rio and I drove to the hospital as soon as possible. Within a few minutes, we reached the hospital. After waiting for a long doctor came out from the ICU and we asked him about Aunt Tessa

- Doctor, doctor! Is aunt ok?

- I am sorry to say that she is no more. She got a deep shock by something.

- Is there not any other way? Please doctor save her!

- No, it's not possible. We tried in all the possible ways but she couldn't make it.

We went inside her cabin. Rio was crying and it was unable to manage him. We tried to reach Mario but he didn't receive anyone's call. The next day morning during the funeral we lost hope and stopped waiting for Mario. The whole funeral was managed by me and Rio. Rio got a deep shock after their aunt's death. After a few months I moved to my hostel, Rio also shifted to my hostel to complete his higher studies. We tried several times to connect with Mario, but he changed his number.

After 7 months I gave birth to a little girl. I named her Tessa. That day evening I got a call from an unknown number, I received the call, and I was shocked after hearing the voice I never thought that we would ever be able to connect with Mario after Aunt Tessa's death. He congratulated me on my newborn baby,

- Hey! Congratulation Betty. Now you are a mother of a child who is prettier than you. I hope that you forgive me and I wish you luck in the future. Stay happy with your family. Bye, and thanks for answering the call.

Before I could tell that the girl was not only mine it was our baby he cut off the call. Sometimes it is unable to express something to someone, and sometimes we have to stay quiet even though we know that it's very important to tell them but we feel better staying quiet just for their happiness.

The next morning Mario came to visit me and Tessa with some fruits and toys to welcome the newborn.

- Hey! Good morning to our new mother and our little one.

- Good morning, to Tessa's uncle. You know yesterday evening I got a call from Mario, he congratulated me.

- Yes I know he called me too. He again went back to his hostel to complete his higher studies.

- That's great!

- As I heard he is now dating Dianna, his roommate.

- It's good to hear that he moved on.

After returning to the hostel, everyone welcomed me and Tessa with a small gathering. Within 3-4 months of my delivery, my mother died in an accident. She had an accident while returning home after meeting me and Tessa. It was very difficult for me to accept her death.

2 years passed since that day, and while I was thinking about all this stuff Jennifer shook me and awakes me. He told me that Rio was waiting outside with his car, I kept Tessa with her and asked her to take care of Tessa. She told me to call her if we need any help. I quickly took my bag and ran downstairs and got inside Rio's car. First, we went to Mario's hostel, and they all said that he had been missing the past few weeks and not answering any calls. They tried several times to contact him. Then went to our house but he was not there, then we thought to visit our farmhouse where we used to spend our summer vacations in childhood. On the highway, we took a break and had our lunch in a restaurant. Suddenly, Rio held my hand and told me that he always had a crush on me but never confessed to me as I was happy with his brother.

- Betty, I know it's hard for you to manage everything alone, and am sorry for my brother's behavior but if you could ever forgive love, then I will be the next to love you.

- You are my best friend, you stood with me in my hardest times and I am thankful to you for everything. But at this point, in my life, I can't fall in love once more but if it ever becomes possible to forget everything and forgive love, then you would be the next, you be the one on whose shoulder I would lean.