30. Chapter 30

June 27, 2014 – And… we are back in Kent

Chapter 30

Mrs. Annesley appeared in the Breakfast room to find the Colonel and Darcy already finished eating.

"Is my sister to follow you shortly, Mrs. Annesley?"

"Actually sir, she will not. Miss Darcy awoke with a headache and asked me to have a tray sent up to her room."

"I shall go visit her right now."

"That was the wish she conveyed to me, sir."

"Then if you will excuse me, Mrs. Annesley, Cousin"

"Give my best to Georgiana, Darcy. Tell her I hope she is feeling better soon."

"Of course."

With that, Darcy made his way to Georgiana's room.

"May I come in, dearest?"

"Of course, Fitzwilliam, you are just the person I had hoped to see. Well, the only person I dared hope to see." Georgiana smiled sheepishly.

"Mrs. Annesley told me you were unwell with a headache. Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Yes there is. I was supposed to join Elizabeth for a walk this morning. Would you mind going in my place? I have written her a note explaining the situation. Please, Fitzwilliam, it would very much relieve my worry if you would do this for me."

"You know I cannot resist you when you ask me that way." He teased. "It would be my honor to escort Miss Bennet this morning."

"Thank you, Brother. I am sure I will be feeling much better by this evening. Elizabeth will understand once she has read my note."

"Then I should be off to keep your appointment. Oh! Georgiana, I received a letter from Charles Bingley this morning. Would you like to hear what I was able to decipher?"

Georgiana knew the trial her brother had trying to read Bingley's scrawl. "Of course I would since you obviously wish to tell me."

"Bingley wrote to announce his engagement to Jane Bennet."

"That is wonderful news!" Unable to resist she plowed ahead. "Does not one wedding usually bring on another?"

"Georgiana Darcy! Are you trying to play matchmaker?"

"Yes I am! But I really do have a headache and I would not be able to meet with Elizabeth this morning if I wanted to. I do not think that she will be too disappointed with having you as her companion in my stead."

"Perhaps not. Where am I supposed to meet her?"

"By the path to the glade"

"Very good!" Visibly pleased, Darcy was unable to resist himself and added, "Wish me luck!"

'Indeed I shall brother, indeed I shall' She added to herself after her brother quit her room.

Lady Catherine caught Darcy retreating from his sister's room and immediately began accosting him.

"I have heard that my niece did not come down for breakfast. Is she unwell? I must know!"

"Lady Catherine" Darcy began smoothly, "Georgiana awoke this morning with a headache. She assures me that it will be better with rest and solitude. She asked that she not be disturbed." Seeing Lady Catherine about to object, Darcy hurried on. "I am sure that if our dear Anne had asked the same thing you would respect her wishes Aunt. After all, I know that you have long regarded Georgiana as a kind of second daughter." 'You owe me for that one sister!'

"Yes, Darcy, you are correct. We must allow Georgiana her rest. I have been meaning to…"

"You will have to excuse me Lady Catherine. Georgiana was supposed to walk with Miss Bennet this morning and was distressed to have to miss it. She has charged me with delivering this note to Miss Bennet with her apologies. I believe she is waiting even now."

"Of course, Darcy. Normally I would object to someone of such low connections befriending Georgiana but find that I cannot object. When I heard she had rejected Mr. Collins I must admit it raised my opinion of her. It may have been imprudent on her part but I believe Mr. Collins would have had a difficult time handling her. The present Mrs. Collins does an admirable job with the man if I do say so myself."

"Miss Bennet rejected Mr. Collins? Remarkable!"

"Yes it is. Now go and discharge your duty, Darcy. I shall expect to talk with you this afternoon."

Resigned to his fate Darcy replied, "As you wish, Lady Catherine," and departed to meet Miss Bennet.

When Elizabeth saw Darcy approach she was filled with joy. The smile on her face was immediately replaced with a frown of concern when she realized Georgiana did not accompany him.

"Good morning, Miss Bennet. You look displeased to see me!" Darcy said as he bowed.

"Good Morning, Mr. Darcy" Elizabeth responded as she rose from her curtsey. "I am not displeased to see you, sir. Indeed this is a pleasant surprise. I was only expecting to see your sister. Pray tell, is she unwell?"

"I am glad my presence does not disconcert you!" Darcy teased. "I regret to inform you that my sister awoke with a headache. When she realized she would not be able to meet you she asked me to take her place and to give you this in explanation. She said you would understand after you read it."

Recognizing Georgiana's flowing hand, Elizabeth unsealed the note and began to read.

Elizabeth,

Do not be alarmed that I am unwell. I awoke this morning with the onset of my monthly courses and the headache that nearly always attends them. I am confident that the worst will be over by this evening and I anticipate being able to see you tomorrow. Please assure my dear brother that I will be fine. I love Fitzwilliam, but he can be rather clueless when it comes to such things.

Georgiana

Seeing his anxious appearance, Elizabeth smiled. "I am sure you sister will be feeling much better by this time tomorrow."

"Truly?"

"Truly, sir," she assured him.

"Then shall we take this way together?" He said as he offered her his arm and leading the way to the glade.

"I believe I can tolerate your presence for now, Mr. Darcy," she laughed as she took his proffered arm.

"I believe I should be offering you congratulations, Miss Bennet. I received a short missive from Mr. Bingley announcing his betrothal to your eldest sister"

"Thank you. I too received the same news from Jane. Though, from what I hear of Mr. Bingley's correspondence, I believe I had a much easier time learning of it than you did."

Darcy laughingly replied, "Of that I have no doubt!"

"What is your opinion of the match, sir?"

"I am pleased, if that is what you are asking. Bingley is a great friend. I only wish to see him happy and he has made it quite clear to me that the only way that will happen is if he has his Miss Bennet at his side as his wife."

"You are a good friend indeed then, Mr. Darcy. I am afraid there are many who will not look on the match with a kind eye. My sister brings little to the union other than her sweet disposition and caring manner. Not many will overlook our lack of sizable dowries."

Darcy sighed, "I am afraid you are all too correct in your opinion of society, Miss Bennet. But I am confident than when Bingley introduces the new Mrs. Bingley to his friends, they will be won over quickly by her grace and charm."

They walked on in silence. After a few minutes, Elizabeth introduced a new topic for discussion.

"Mr. Darcy, we have often discussed books together but you have never told me who your favorite author is."

"Until recently I would have said Milton. But I have come to regard Shakespeare as my favorite now."

"Why Mr. Darcy, how extraordinary! I have come to believe you a man of firm principles who once he has come to a decision rarely changes his mind. What made you change yours, sir?"

They had just entered the glade and before he lost his nerve Darcy began.

"Let me not to the marriage of true minds admit impediments:"

Elizabeth stopped immediately, her eyes flying to his, scarcely daring to believe what this was implying.

Darcy took her hand in his and continued.

"Love is not love

Which alters when its alteration finds,

Or bends with the remover to remove.

O, no, it is an ever-fixed mark

That looks on tempests and is never shaken;

It is the star to everywand'ring bark,

Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.

Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and checks

Within his bending sickle's compass come;

Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,

But bears it out even to the edge of doom.

If this be error and upon me proved,

I never writ nor no man ever loved."*

When he finished he held her gaze.

"Miss Bennet, Elizabeth. I can see that you know where this conversation is leading. But there are things that I must say before I get to that point. They are painful to speak of and may be painful to hear, but I owe it to both of us to tell you. May I proceed?"

Numbly she nodded her head.

Her put her hand back on his arm and began to lead her towards the rough bench his father had made for his mother so many years ago.

"I think it best you sit here. This may take a while. Please listen to all I have to say. When I am finished, if you wish me to stop, I will."

Once she was seated he began. "Has Georgiana ever spoken to you about Ramsgate or George Wickham?"

Confused, Elizabeth shook her head yes.

"In Hertfordshire I told you about Wickham and the living in my father's will. I told you about how he imposed himself on Georgiana. Early last summer when I allowed Georgiana to travel to Ramsgate with her companion Mrs. Younge, I had no idea of the danger I put her in. I am ashamed now how much I neglected my duty to my sister by not thoroughly inquiring after Mrs. Younge. If not for the providence of God, Georgiana would be shackled to that villain as his wife. You met Georgiana at Pemberley not long after that. You noticed the sadness about her. We have spoken of this before."

Elizabeth nodded.

"That was why I was so surprised to find her so altered, so much more like her old self when I returned to Pemberley. I soon learned of your meeting and of your correspondence with her. I must admit that at first I was uneasy with this. I knew nothing of you or your family and I immediately made inquiries with Mrs. Reynolds. I was much relieved when she assured me of her daughter Mary's high opinion of you. I know Mary Clark and I know that she is a good judge of people. Mrs. Annesley also testified of your gentle handling of my sister. Do not be upset with Georgiana, but she began to share with me the letters she received from you. I think she knew I needed the reassurance"

"Do not distress yourself, Mr. Darcy. I know you were only looking out for her best interests. After what you have related to me so far, I must say that I am in agreement."

"Thank you. And I must say that you are an amusing correspondent. We laughed so hard many times that we were both driven to tears!" Elizabeth grinned.

"So then, when Georgiana asked to come with me to Netherfield I was disposed to agree. I reasoned that if your letters were helping bring my Georgiana back, your very presence would be certain to accelerate the process. And I was right. What I did not anticipate was the affect you would have on me."

At this Elizabeth colored and dropped her eyes to examine her gloves.

"It began the first night we met. You have this strange power over Darcys it seems, Elizabeth."

When he said her name she looked up to him again, her eyes drawn to his.

"At first I did not wish to acknowledge it. I came to enjoy your company. But after the Netherfield Ball, after our dance and conversation… I became confused and frightened. How could some country miss make me feel so disquieted? I had been raised to do my duty; to marry someone in my own circle and to beget heirs to continue our family name and Pemberley. When you came to London I began to withdraw into myself. It was very unfair of me. From the first of our acquaintance you offered me your friendship without expectation of anything else. Do you realize that you are the first woman who has ever done that? I decided for Georgiana's sake that I needed to accept you as her friend. She needed you and if that meant that I had to accept your friendship then so be it. I was a fool to believe I could stop it there."

"Elizabeth, you are a spectacular woman the likes of which I have never seen. It is only my pride which has prevented me from admitting it to myself until recently."

"What has changed? Why do you tell me this now?" Elizabeth pleaded.

"I am ashamed to tell you this, Elizabeth. Please forgive me for what I am about to say. The night of the Ball at Netherfield I became aware of the general opinion that Bingley was expected soon to make his addresses to your sister. Do you remember our conversation with Sir William whilst we were dancing?" Elizabeth nodded yes.

"Up until that point I sincerely doubted your sister's affection. No, do not say it. After your words I came to realize that I did not know her true feelings and that I probably would not know unless I asked directly. When the last of the guests left, Bingley invited me to join him in his study. I came right to the point and asked him what his intentions were. He confirmed he was preparing to bring his suit before Miss Bennet. I felt that I owed it to him, as a friend, to talk seriously about this with him. I told him that it was impossible for me to assure him one way or another of your sister's feelings but I did have some serious questions to ask. I told Bingley that after my conversation with you that I believed your sister would only marry for love. But I was unsure whether or not your sister would even be allowed to reject his suit if she wanted to, though I did not say this to Bingley. I am sorry to say, but your mother did not appear to be the type to allow that to happen."

"You are mistaken there, sir!"

"Yes, I know that now. But I did not know that then."

"And pray, how do you know this?"

"Because you were allowed to refuse an offer of marriage"

Shocked at this Elizabeth asked, "How did you learn this?"

"Lady Catherine let it slip this morning. Actually, she told me that it raised her opinion of you," Darcy smiled.

"But I digress. I also warned Charles about your sister's lack of fortune and connections. I am ashamed to admit that Bingley had to remind me that in marrying your sister he would actually become her equal. His money comes from trade. He does not own his own estate. Longbourn has been in your family for generations. As to fortune, he has enough to not be needing any more from his bride. I warned him that he would end up having to care for your mother and any remaining unmarried sisters once your father died, with Longbourn entailed away to Mr. Collins. Forgive me again, but your mother would be a trial for Bingley, no matter how pleasant his disposition. Please understand, I did not want to see Bingley trapped in a loveless marriage. I wanted to see him happy."

Elizabeth colored again and sighed resignedly. "While it is not easy for me to hear these things, I understand, Mr. Darcy. My mother does not display the propriety she should. Neither do my youngest sisters. I know we have little but our charms to recommend us when finding a marriage partner and I am touched by the concern you have shown your friend. You have nothing to be ashamed of to me. It is I who should be ashamed in front of you."

"Do not say that! I am ashamed because I used the arguments I used on Bingley upon myself. I have not told you yet what he said to me that night when I had finished. He spoke to me about my parents. He asked me, if I had a chance to find love the way that they did would I reject it because of society and status? He told me that he would not and if Jane Bennet was the woman he would love the rest of his life, then he would let nothing stand in his way of marrying her if she would have him. But I was not yet willing to explore the import of his words as related to myself."

At this he was silent. He gazed at her trying to discern her thoughts but could not. She dropped her gaze to her hands again. Finally, he continued.

"Last week I received a letter from my Aunt Matlock. Colonel Fitzwilliam had written to his parents about me, and about you. He knew I was struggling with my ideas of my family's expectations. He asked his mother to give me the 'Fitzwilliam family talk'."

"And what is the 'Fitzwilliam family talk'"? Elizabeth asked.

"It is the best piece of advice I have ever received. Simply put, the Earl and his wife have told each of their children the same thing. Choose for your life partner someone whom you can love and respect. The rest will take care of itself."

Darcy looked at Elizabeth. It was time.

*Shakespeare, Sonnet No. 116

Yes, I really did stop there.