Day Four

"Because of you! Because of all of you, my family has to face this fate!"

"…should we do something to help?"

"Nothing is truly right or wrong, black or white; nothing is that easy to judge, Martin. You really don't know that, my boy?"

"…but…"

"You choose this life; you live with the tradeoffs. It's necessary."

Gasp!

Martin woke up early. It was six in the morning, the time he always woke up for a jog. He shook his head to shake away the grogginess and slowly massaged his temples as he thought of memories that had been haunting him for months. Until he could finally make a decision, he would feel guilty for the rest of his life. Or maybe what the people said was true—he was a coward.

The sounds of chirping birds in the morning and the cool breeze calm him down. He loved the morning. He had to go out and run to clear his head at dawn when the weather was this comforting. But as soon as he tried to get up...

Incredibly small arms pulled him into a tight hug like a personal pillow. He flinched but couldn't move. Even though he was drowsy from just waking up, he instinctively knew that the woman that hugged him tightly wouldn't do any harm.

That kid…

Martin looked at her through the dim light of morning. That unruly high society kid...

"I gave you a king-sized bed to sleep on, don't you like it?" He whispered to the peacefully sleeping Celine. The said high society girl didn't move an inch.

The sofa that was once wide when sleeping alone became cramped and crowded when Celine unexpectedly joined him. He had to use his recently regained consciousness to figure out why she was there.

"Wake up. Wake up. I need to go jogging." He didn't want to wake her up, but he was also keen to go back to his daily routine. Not knowing what to do, he simply looked at her.

"Hmm…mmm…" The girl was helpless. She was deep asleep and probably not waking up anytime soon. He knew she was the type that woke up late, and so he gave up trying to wake her up.

"Just let me go. If you hold on to me like this, who will make breakfast?" It may be useless to talk to the person sleeping. But she hugged his waist so tight that the ask in this helpless plight was probably the only way.

"Hmm…mmm…" She, in her slumber, uttered some noise signaling her annoyance which made him laugh. This must be the first time that they can face each other (with one party totally unconscious) for such a long time without arguing, or he couldn't bear to say a word of reprimand, or she would complain about something.

While she slept, he thought he was envious of her peace. To him, she looked like a child who was not aware of the filthiness of the world. She could live like a normal person, using her money to buy things she likes; being content with life; and sometimes getting a headache over problems that, to him, are not even a problem.

Either way, it was probably the same as he used to be before ambition led to choosing a path with no return.

"Do you want me to sleep more?" Martin whispered to the warm sleeping body hugging him as if she would understand or communicate with him in any form. He had work to do and mistakes he needed to fix. But still…

"Mmm…"

I would just guess she meant yes.

He decided to lie to himself that this was just a normal holiday and all those mistakes never happened. It would be nice to live in this fantasy world as beautiful as heaven with a woman who made him smile. At least before she goes back... this shouldn't be a big deal.

Just lying to his conscience for a week or two that he could spend a life he chooses—this shouldn't be a big deal.

****

"M-Martin. Hey, Martin." A small hesitant feminine voice woke him. He opened his eyes, but everything in his view was still blurry.

Why was that voice so close?

"Can you let go of me? I can't breathe."

What?

When he opened his eyes and examined his surroundings carefully, he found that this time it was him who hugged her tightly, his arms around her waist, their bodies close together.

Initially, in shock at his own action, he didn't move for a few seconds before letting go of her. He normally dislikes touching or contact in general.

"I'm sorry." He said candidly, not looking at her.

"Don't worry about it." She replied softly, and soon after, she left for the bedroom. Right at the time she left his side, Martin glanced over and saw her—the girl had stopped to look at him for a moment before closing the door. Their eyes met for a split second. Her eyes fell low, and Celine's face immediately turned away. But he saw… even for a split second. He saw the girl's face turn bright red...

He felt a bit embarrassed by his own action. And hope it didn't stir up any unnecessary feelings or cause any misunderstanding. But he knew nothing would come out of it. Celine seemed like someone who loves hugging people. Maybe hugging is something she normally does. Or maybe it's a cultural norm for someone her age, similar to what she did yesterday hugging him in a bookstore.

Besides, she will leave soon. And he needed to return to fix his own broken world, amend his sins, and make things right again. There was no room for any complicated feeling.

He only wanted to spend another week forgetting everything and enjoying this make-believe world of them both being on holiday bliss together.

He made a decision as if it was a done deal and got up to make them both breakfast.