Unspoken Past

I finally get to my bed. After training with that shadow teacher I let my magic recover and went for another training session inside the Great training facility. Now, I'm tired as hell. Both mentally and physically.

"Ugh!" I let my body drop on the bed.

"You okay?" (Andrew)

"Do I sound okay?" (Luis)

"No, you don't... Um, Luis."

"Yes?"

"Are all of those rumors about you true?"

It looks like the rumors circulated to my roommate. Whatever those rumors are, I have no fucking idea.

"Believe what you want to believe is true."

"...Then I believe that they are false!"

"Mhhh? That doesn't make sense, the rumors come from the most trusted guy in school right? Are you implying he's not trustworthy?"

"...I don't know, it's just that...You don't seem like a bad person to me."

And here we have another person like that underclassman. Whatever, I'm just going to sleep.

"Yes, Yeah. Goodnight."

"....Goodnight."

Today was so eventful I have no idea even where to begin. I wonder what exactly will happen tomorrow with all of this shit going on. I'm just going to do my daily assimilation and fall asleep.

_______________________________________________________

I'm back at middle school. What is going on? I'm slowly walking forward.

"Luis...Luis!...LUIS!" (Tara)

Huh, what is Tara doing? She's pulling on my sleeve.

"Come one, why did you stop walking? Stop daydreaming on me, we are going to be late for school."

She pulls me along into the school. Wait a second, what is going on? I make her release my hand.

"Who are you?"

"...What do you mean? I'm Tara." She says showing a confused face.

"No, that can't be. Tara is dead."

I see a smile form on her lips and in the next moment, I see how Tara looked like before her death. Covered in blood and barely breathing.

"That's right, I'm dead. I died because you were too weak."

"..."

...What is going on?...

"You couldn't keep me alive and you couldn't keep your promise either. Swore upon my grave?" She laughs. "What a joke."

"SHUT UP!"

I start shaking, what is going on...

"What, you can't face facts?" She stands up, blood and intestine spillover, "Let me tell you something. All you did was give a vain promise and you weren't even able to keep it. What you did were just say empty to word to empty space."

"What else could I have done?! I trained every day! Searched for clues! And even killed people! I TRIED MY BEST!"

"And look all around you. This is what your best did."

Tara disappears and all I see is a room full of corpses...This is that room from the Crimson Night Raid. However, the one leaning on the couch isn't that guy from Crimson Night, but Jefe, the same figure he had as when I shot him that night. Jefe looks up at me.

"Is this why you killed me? So that you weren't able to carry through with your own resolve!?"

"NO!"

I wake up in cold sweat. I'm breathing heavily... Andrew is right next to me. That was just a dream. I try to calm my breathing

"Ummm...are you okay?"

"...What exactly happened."

"That's what I should be asking you, you were screaming things in your sleep. What exactly were you dreaming about?"

"...I-"

Someone bangs on the door repeatedly.

"...I should probably answer that."

"Go ahead."

He walks towards the door...I need to calm down before I say anything. I can't exactly tell him what happened before, I barely know him. I try to find my bracelet again... Am I even allowed to have this bracelet too?...

No, I can't have these thoughts. I already lost the bracelet I made a promise with. I won't throw away the only thing that my only friends have ever left behind. I steady my breathing... What time is it? 6:00 in the morning? I guess I'll go for a jog, it might help with this unrestful feeling I have.

I feel a pair of guys come into the room. These presences are the gay guys from next door... They are probably Andrew's friends based on how he begged me the first time we met. I don't have time for this, I get off my bed and put on my bracelet.

"Woah, slow down there. Where do you think you are going?" (voice 1)

I can't see their facial features, nor do I know what their names are. I'll just call it voice number 1 for now.

"I'm going out for a jog to calm down," I say as I take off my cloth to change.

"Are you sure going out is a good idea?" (voice 1)

"Yes," I say fully changed.

"Why? I'm sure if you talk it out with us you'll feel better." (Voice 1)

He tries to put his hand on my shoulder but I slap it away.

"Don't touch me. I don't need your pity." (Luis)

"You little-"

"Oscar!" (Voice 2)

"But I'm trying to help, can't he see." (Oscar)

"And neither did I ask for it nor do I want it you homosexual fuck," I say as I walk away.

"... How did you know? Andrew?...."

"I didn't tell him I swear, he found out by himself!" (Andrew)

"..."

I walk out of the room...as soon as I go out of the place I went out full sprint. The facilities are closed at this time of the morning so I'll just keep this pace for a whole lap around this place. Hopefully, by the time I finish my jog, I already finished calming down.

I keep on jogging for a while trying to calm myself down until I end up at an open field... has this always been here? Whatever, I think I'm going to lay down for a while and think this through. I get to the field, I was going pretty fast.

I'm breathing heavily, I lay down on the ground and look up...

...This is kind of like that time I wanted to break the white bracelet. I'm only missing a tree, though I guess that this time I'd probably destroy the tree instead of just denting it... I give a small laugh...

What was that dream?... I have felt a little guilty about it before but I haven't really thought about it that much. And why exactly does it happen now of all time?... I don't know...

I calm down my breathing and look up. I see a star-filled with stars, I couldn't really see the stars in New York but I guess here, where there's not much light pollution, you can see the stars clearly huh...

...That dream... I guess I had ignored it since I thought it as necessary before, but my actions killed a lot of people... All of that, for basically nothing... it's not like I can do anything about that anymore... I can't brush it off like this though...

I just have to face it, I'm a murderer... I really don't want to think about that all, I guess I have to find something to keep me occupied... I should probably start heading back now... I get up, I feel slightly better now. I take a deep breath and start jogging back.

...Come to think of it, I left the phone at the dormitory since I left in a panic... Holy shit, I have to get back quick. I started jogging back as fast as I could again, hoping that this feeling in my chest would slowly vanish.