Chapter 16: A Bowl Full Of Emotions

Sad and at home, Suzuki managed to get up, pick an egg, and make breakfast. Unable to eat anything, he stared at his food, spaced out in the middle of his dining room. He's heartbroken.

Reality did him dirty. Not that it has changed much since his early days. He knows that the struggle is part of a beautiful story in life, but how long must he struggle for things to fall into a good place for him?

How much longer must he suffer the cruelty of this world for him to smile genuinely? Suzuki knows that money is vital in this world, but deep inside, he knows that a kind soul carries the world in a better direction. What must he do?

Become a filthy rich cunt, or live a life of kindness, hoping to steer this world into a path of good?

Must he leave all those feelings he wants to feel behind and become obsessed with materialistic happiness?

Must he leave behind all his dreams and strive to become a sage in the arts of life, joy, and kindness? He, himself, is confused in a conflict with himself over what to do and what to feel.

Expressing emotions are a rare way of life for him. He never felt like he genuinely belonged in this world. So shut off, alone, and sad. Suzuki wondered if anyone else can share his pain and could see his suffering.

He wishes that there is, but he knows that no one cares. In this fast pace of the world, if you slow down, you'll get caught up in the ugly reality that is in store for you.

If you fall even for a second in this world, there is no guarantee of getting back up.

In this world of hell, he believes that if he were to do anything for it, he'd only hurt himself in the process, and yesterday only proved his point. Money will make him happy. That's what he wants to convince himself.

His consciousness strayed away into the darkness of his head. Suzuki felt hungry, so he got up and dressed.

His face told a million stories, but those stories seemed tossed to waste as none could comprehend his existence. "Landlady, Starbucks girl, Kana, and Nagisa. There, all the same, one moment they know me, the other they forget me." He put on his hoodie and headed towards the entrance door.

"I'm leaving." He announced to the empty apartment. "Am I just a nobody?" He asked himself as he locked his door.

Heading downstairs, he looked into the gloomy sky. He stood there, staring. He lost track of time because of the beautiful rain clouds. Then, suddenly he felt water droplets on his face. Realizing it was raining, he decided not to return for his umbrella.

"Oh, it's that boy." Said an old-age woman while pointing at Suzuki.

Talking to her friend in a low tone did nothing for them. Suzuki heard every bit of thing. "Yeah, the orphan employee we always see at McRonald's." Replied the second lady.

Their faces, almost against one another, kept speaking about how good-looking he was and how much pity they expressed for him for not having a family.

Suzuki didn't care, almost as if he expected it to happen. Almost as if he accepted what others thought of him. "Oh well, whatever." He said as he stepped out of the train.

Walking into a dark ally, then emerging from the other side. Finally, the lights came through, and a beautiful scene of old town Tokyo came into sight.

Looking up, he was surrounded by many people, happy, chatting, and excited.

They paid no attention to him as they walked past him. "Ogata Ramen?" He read the banner on an old ramen stance. "Might as well." He felt his stomach rumble from hunger.

Walking inside, he sat down and ordered. "C-can I get a large Miso soup ramen?"

"Yes, sure." He replied behind the desk.

After cooking some noodles, the shop owner couldn't help but notice the sadness on Suzuki's face. His sad face prompted him to speak to Suzuki. "So, how is your day today?" The shop owner turned around, chopped the scallions, and neatly sliced the bamboo shoots.

"I-It's been well," Suzuki spoke behind the man's back.

"Oh, then. Why the sad face, young man?" He asked as he turned around with a bowl in his hand. Then, pouring the hot broth inside, he took out the noodles, shook them, and slipped them inside the bowl.

Neatly placing the pork cutlets inside the bowl, he organized the bamboo shoots and put a handful of scallions on top of the soup, and for the grand finale, he placed a soft-boiled egg that had been marinated overnight in a sweetened soy-based sauce.

"Here you go. Extra cutlets for you." Said the shop owner with a smile as he held out the bowl toward Suzuki.

Nervously grabbing the bowl, he placed it on the table and stared into it. "T-Thanks, old man." Said Suzuki as he took a pair of chopsticks.

"Don't mention it." The shop owner walked toward the sink beside his cutting station.

"Thanks for the food." Said Suzuki as he dug into his ramen bowl.

Hearing a sob behind his back, the man turned his face and watched as Suzuki cried while slurping his ramen. Then, finally, the gentleman expressed his feelings with a soft smile.