Ancient One

[Merry Christmas everyone!]

Discord: https://discord.gg/4j4yC6EEK8

[Word Count:1370]

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[ Alexandria's POV]

"You know? I hate tea. I hate it even more when people talk over tea or coffee. It doesn't make you look smart nor does it 'calm you down', it just tastes like shit." I whilst siping the tea.

Raising an eyebrow the Ancient one looked at me like I was an Alien.

"Then why are you still drinking it?" She asked amused.

I mean she does have a point.

"Never said I wasn't a hypocrite. It's just that the only hypocrite I like is myself."

Chuckling, the Ancient one decided to get to the point.

"So why are you here Alexan-El? or do you prefer that I call you Alexandria?"

"Eh? Call me whatever the fuck you want I really don't care, as for why I am here shouldn't you know that already oh nosey one?" I said mockingly

I mean mocking someone that can use the only weakness I have is pretty fucking dumb but on the other hand, I can break her neck before she can even blink(that's not mentioning that I can just use my heat vision and pop her brain like a balloon, or the hundreds of other ways I can kill her). Plus she ain't that strong compared to the hundreds of other people I can name on the top of my head so she ain't that intimidating. Though I do have to take into account that she has the fucking time stone hanging on her neck, though I am pretty sure she won't Dr.Strange me like he did to Dormammu.

Also is taking energy from other dimension's really magic? Cuz if not then I could be immune to the marvel universe's magic.

But this is just an assumption, with some ground behind, but not tested enough. Thus the only smart way to go about it is to assume that the magic here can still hurt me.

"Ha. You're here to learn, but you are also here for something else." The Ancient one replied chuckling again in amusement.

Straightening up I nodded affirmatively, not really that surprised that she figured it out. Since discounting the time stone, anyone that comes here is either seeking a fight or to learn. And I sure as hell didn't come here to fight.

"Got it right in one. I am here to learn magic, but also to have my girlfriend study it too." I said confirming her statement.

Nodding as if she knew that already(which she probably did, bitch is omniscient with that fucking time stone). The Ancient one got up and addressed me.

"Sure, come tomorrow with your vampire girlfriend and we will begin your first lesson." She said while looking down at me with an annoying self-entitled smirk on her face.

I wasn't really surprised that she agreed so easily, while yes, I was thrown off a bit with her agreeing so easily. I, however, knew that she was expecting me based on the tea being hot, and the monk letting me in immediately without me even stating my name. So I elected not to ask her reasoning, already knowing why she would teach me so easily.

Nodding I got up and made my way to the exit since I came and got what I wanted.

"Oh, and Superwoman, a word of warning. Be ready because Earth just became world numero uno for the taking." The Ancient one called out as I was right in front of the door.

Not even turning around to reply to her I opened the door, made my way out, and said.

"Yeah, no shit."

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As I flying, making my back towards Forks, I spotted a guy standing on a ledge of a high rise building.

The guy looked to be in his twenties, with average features and a sullen almost robotic look as he gazed on the streets below. His eyes however while lifeless looked afraid as he looked down, for obvious reasons.

Feeling like I got some time to kill, and curious as to why he would want to commit suicide I decided to make a quick pit stop before making my way back home.

Accelerating my flight I made it in front of the guy startling him enough that he slipped and almost fell off the ledge if I didn't catch him by the scruff of his neck.

Screaming his head off in fear the dude looked at me in fear and recognition.

Still grabbing his neck I floated down towards the roof of the building and non too gently dumping the sack of snot and tears on the floor.

"Now. I really don't care what your name is, or who you are, all I care about right now is why the fuck were you about to yeet yourself off this building" I said still floating in above of the now cowering man.

"I-I-I m-my girlfriend c-cheated on me" He stuttered out still crying hysterically.

"Tuff luck my guy, but why the fuck would you want to kill yourself because a bitch decided to spread her legs? Have you no respect for yourself? Fuck that bitch, just leave the motherfucker and find you a queen. I mean I get it you loved her, she didn't obviously but killing yourself because of that seems like a loss for you and a win for her." I said unable to understand his reasoning.

Sniffing his snot back, the guy seemed to be listening to me, though he still looked depressed.

'Poor guy' I thought, before making a decision.

"Okay, look. I know that breaking up with someone that you love is never easy, even more so if that someone cheated on you, and I also know that humans are fucking dumb when it comes to emotions. So here's what we are gonna do, or well here's what you will do. I'll take you with me to a strip club, you are gonna go there make it rain on some fine ass bitches, don't worry about the money I'll give you some. Then you're gonna get piss poor drunk, find you a girl to take home. If you can't find a girl you can always call a prostitute and have the time of your life. Maybe smoke some weed or something. After you wake up tomorrow after getting some pussy, go home, hug your family, or your pet, watch some movies, call your friends, or generally do anything but thinking or calling your ex. Keeping doing that on repeat, and you should be good" I said logically.

Oi? What's better than pussy, drugs, and booze after breaking up?

Taking the now calm guy(he is crying silently now) by the scruff of his neck again, took off towards a local strip club at speeds the guy couldn't even comprehend and dumped him on the steps of the strip club with 4 thousand dollars in cash in his pocket, that I got from pickpocketing some guy in a suit on the way here. It's his fault though. Who the fuck keeps 4 thousand dollars in their pocket? The dude had it coming.

Ignoring the shocked crowd who were waiting outside for the bouncer to let them in, looking at me, some already taking out their phones and filming me, I looked at the bouncer and said.

"Look this dude right here(I pointed at the sniveling mess under me) had a pretty hard day, please take care of him, get him some pussy, some weed, and all-around just have him forget about his current problems. The dude just got cucked, so I'd go easy on him first. Just have him get drunk and go from their." I said to the now nodding bouncer.

See the dude completely understands my line of reasoning!

Nodding on last time to the wide-eyed bouncer. I started to take off, however before that I looked at the poor guy and said.

"Now listen dude, you go with this nice man right here and have the time of your life. Tomorrow when you wake up be sure to ask for a refund before you give the girl back to the streets."