Dragon Princess, Awake

Warning: Food gore.

Shivers rippled up Sophia's cold hands.

Hands pulling slightly out of the icy, partially melted crevice of the half frozen carcass she'd spent the last hour or so trying to scratch her way into.

It was so colddd.

It kept melting parts she didnt want it to. Watery ice, bloody ice, bones, the stringy edges of something edible but not the big chunks of meat imprisoned inside. The cold seeped into her skin with the melting, making her hands feel tender to every bump and prick of the sometimes sharp edges of the iced chunk.

Hissssss.

The tiny dragon snapped at the large object ferally, Her blonde hair messily fallen over her hair, her eyes dilated and slitted, about as dragon-like as her humanoid form could go--no distinguishable scales, no spikes or horns or shapeshifting--despite the animalistic responses that betrayed the fiery soul inside.

Sophia squeezed her eyes shut in grimace, silencing her snarl to lower growl, only to have to force them open again, pursing her lips and then squishing her face into a toothy scowl as she circled and surveyed the well-frozen chunk again. It was so thoroughly frozen. It would have been easy if she could have just grabbed handfulls and stuffed her desperate face from the places her sister had already opened up the long dead creature, but everything was as hard frozen as a rock. It would have been gross, but she too was a dragon. If big dragons could hunt wild animals with their mouths and claws and swallow them down whole, then she would learn to someday, too. It would have been easy if she could just firebreathe. It would have been easy if she could have dragged the entire carcass to her sister--maybe it would have melted just a little bit faster on one end. But, alas, she was too weak to drag an animal several times her weight.

Haaa. She tried blowing. She tried blowing a breath from the place where her lungs had warmer air, from a place that was probably closest to her dragon heart. She tried to push in her stomach, to expel it with her whole being.

"Haaaaaaaeeeghhhhhh"

But nothing came. And she kind of felt sick, so she didn't do it again.

She licked the brownish, oxidized blood that had mixed with ice water off her hand. It tasted really bad. It probably only tasted better than dirt. But she was so hungry... Her body felt okay, almost normal, strength wise, and her fever was gone, and she could breathe easily for some reason, but her stomach felt so empty, and from the little bit she'd wondered around outside the entrance of the cave, there was absolutely nothing to eat as far as she could see. Not even a leaf on a tree.

She gnawed on the exposed bone of a snapped limb. Not all parts of the carcass melted at the same rate. It wasn't as though she hadn't made any success at all. But the tiny strings and morsels, the outer soft coating around the ends of bones, it wasn't enough to feel like anything. It just made her drool.

She still didn't understand her sister's memory, from somewhere in the haze of the fever.

The ends?

It was somewhat satisfying to her psyche, but her jaws weren't strong enough to bite through the frozen bone. Perhaps they were soft enough for her sister to bite through. She tried as much as she could. But Sophia's jaw hinge began to hurt after a while, and she returned to absently nibbling, staring off into the cave.

She scratched at the skin of the deer, trying to pull it away, but she didn't have enough strength to do anything. And just like before, the exposed outside meaty parts were hard as rocks from the cold.

Cough! Cough!

Sophia grimaced as she licked the darkened blood off her fingers, taking her cue to make it back to her sister as her chest began to feel weak. She wasn't even that cold, but it was that same feeling as always. When winter came and all parts of the air got consistently cold; when the thoroughness seeped into her chest, and just sort of dissipated her warmth among it, as though her body could keep warming and warming herself but it wasn't enough, the cold kept seeping it away. When her chest began to make whistling sounds as she breathed, when her skin felt numb but it wasnt. She didn't want to feel that way again.

Sophia collapsed flat against her sister's side, slipping down to her legs and rolling into the blankets...ahhh. The warm, warm blankets.

Sophia snuggled with her head against her sister for a little bit. Warm, she was definitely thoroughly warm, from somewhere deep within. It wasn't a warmth that replaced the empty air, but it soothed her. It didn't fill, but it was a warmth that seeped. A living warmth. She made a nice warmer, for herself or the blanket, both... But she wasn't awake. Sophia had waited patiently for many hours, motionlessly standing besides her head, watching. The sad feeling she'd experienced bubbling up and steadying down had dried out and sunken down into her hungry belly, leaving an empty uncertainty and a kind of more tangible, constant sadness, that was milder but harder, consistent and never going away. Its fumes had risen up into her head, but it wasn't like the water vapory feeling of tears. Cold and stomachy, that yucky spit taste, it was more of that feeling. Like something was inside her, or a muscle was tensed permanently somewhere inside her skull.

Still, Sonata's presence was comforting. Her existence still protected her from the overwhelming unknown that was the tiny bug people, asleep or not. She didn't look at Sonata's booboo anymore. She didn't wonder if her sister would be okay.

She had to be.

Sophia hugged her sister's arm, brows scrunched into though. The warm crackle of the fire kissed her face.

"What if something comes? Will Mamà save us?"

She looked up, when Sonata took too long.

"Why aren't you answering?"

Sonata looked down at her silently. Her brows came into motion first, the smallest flickers of movement, the smallest of those affectionate smiles at the edges of her lips. She pulled Sophia into a hug, though she was already resting quite closely upon Sonata's shoulder.

But she wasn't complaining. It felt good, to feel somebody trying to hug you. It was the trying part that warmed her insides, whatever the awkward or barely existent pressure may land.

"If something comes, I'll protect you." She pressed Sophia's head against her shoulder, in the memory. She could hear blood passing up from an artery in her sister's humanoid vein. She could feel the faint creaks of movement of her bones rattling through her shoulder and vibrating onto her own, hidden beneath her shoulder flesh.

"I promise, I'm right here," she'd said. "I'll protect you. I promised mother I'd protect you."

She nibbled her lip. She couldn't help it, that tears had welled up onto her eyes and overflowed onto her sister's dress. She didn't know why it made her cry, when it wasn't something out of character for her sister to say, and neither was it unusual for it to be unbelievable at all that that promise would be kept even if Sonata gave it her all, if any danger occurred.

But, for some reason she really wanted to hear it.

She wanted to head her say it again.

She said she'd protect her.

She'd promised.

She was still too useless to do that for herself. If she was a little bigger, if she wasn't a defective dragon, if she had a little bit of intelligence or talent to make up for it, she would.

On their own, she felt her facial muscles relax. But it still hurt, as though they were still scrunched and she was still fighting them from contorting.

She'd been feeling more and more, nowadays, like she was looking and controlling her body from a little bit behind and above it. When was the last time she'd felt completely inside herself? She didn't know. She didn't remember. All that remained was the gut instinct that the alternative had once existed.

********

Trigger Warning: Chronic Illness, Violence

Pain

Pain rattled her body from its core.

An unquantifiable hunger crept out in pulsing tendrils that squeezed and cramped every part of her being with a searing, fiery pain.

_It hurt so much._

Her dormant body throbbed and ached from exhaustion and injuries all over, especially her arm. And in between those periods of laughably strange release, _it_ came in waves, the pain that radiated outwards, instead of outside-in. The pain that radiated out from her core, consuming her entire being with a primordial hunger, punishing her for every moment it was not spent quenched.

The dragon snapped her eyes open, her breath heaving heavily as her green eyes quickly moved around to survey the area.

Eat... Eat... She needed to devour something, now. She needed to fill the hole pulsing inside of her, imminently, or she felt like she was going to go mad.

It was a more personal, maddening pain than normal wounds or cuts; Of certain likeness to the dizzy, sick feeling in your stomach after you'd cried your lungs out, those small traces of torment that tickled into the ache of one's cheeks after you'd gotten dehydrated from crying too long, festered.

It was the pain of brain freezes that went on too long and the pain of acid released into one's veins when one's stomach churned with enough despair, the pain of growth spurts and bone marrow, as no growth spurt had hurt before.

Grr... hggggr....hughhh....huhhhh

A tiny, frazzled looking blonde haired child was the only thing in her immediate vicinity, her tiny hands gripping the front of her collar with the smallest of the ends of a tremor, likely from when the dragon's head had suddenly shot up.

It hurt. It hurt!

She couldn't deal with that now.

Hughhhh....Hughhhh.... The dragon hoarsely breathed.

The dragon brushed wordlessly past the stunned being, stumbling clumsily on only three legs, unwilling to stop even though it missed and banged it body against the walls as it rushed towards the front of the cave.

Hunger... the pain. She had to quench it, quickly.

She sunk her maw greedily into the old remains of the deer, half frozen and nearly untouched from its half eaten state of days ago. It was cold and icy and old, and no matter how much she horses down, it just wasn't enough. More, more, she needed so much more, many more of these, now, it hurt.

"Sis?" The tiny, worried being finally called from the exact spot she'd left it, tiny eyes wide open and glossy.

RROOAAARRRR!!!

She snapped, a terrifying sound that echoed off the walls in haunting husks. Sophia squeezed her eyes shut and pulled up her shoulders, pressing her hands against her ears and stumbling backwards, then covering her face and sinking to the ground.

Hughhh..hughhh...

CRUNCh

The dragon moved its attention back to wolfing down the remains of her hunt, while the little being remained crouched down with her arms shielding her head in fear.

PULL... CRACK... CRUNCh

RIP

CRACK... CRUNCh

Hahh...

CRUNCh

Hahhh...hahhh..

The finally dragon stopped to catch her breath between gulps, and consciousness began to return to her. Her dilated eyes slowly receded back to their usual slitted pupils, a mix of ice water and blood dripping down her maw.

She took in the sight of the mostly devoured, mangled deer corpse before her. The taste of blood dripping down her tongue and the weight running down her throat was most satisfying feeling she'd felt in a while.

She'd inhaled down too much of their rations, though.

Hahh...Hhahh... SNARL...

Scratch scratch

GGHHHHHh.... HHHhh....Hhhh....fffhhhhhhhHHH....

The dragon buried its head against the sand to stop itself from making noise, it's chest heaving up and down violently as the adrenaline of the previous hunger pang wore out.

Too fast, the pain of her severed arm dawned on her like before.

HISSSS....HISSSSS

GROWL

The young dragon dug it's snout into the sand and slammed the back of its body against the side of the cave, thrusting its feet against the sand as if trying to get away from itself as its body convulsed from the full force of the pain again. She snarled and growled and snapped at the air where the bottom part of her arm would have been, forgetting herself temporarily until a flash of yellow that had registered in the split of a moment as treasure caught her attention from some primal part of her being.

GRRRRRRRR...HHf...Hahh...Hahh

Sand dropped down the dragon's snout as it lifted its head and turned around. It forced its whines back down as it was once again made aware of its surroundings.

Hahhh....hahhhh

The dragon moved closer, step by step. Sophia didn't react except to stiffen as the dragon circled her, sniffed the side of her cheek, and then into her hair, the back of her neck, the sleeves of the arms she'd sheilded herself with and the top of her head, as though it'd picked up something of interest. Eyes just as focused as when she'd approached her food. The dragon nudged the side of her cheek, but then nuzzled against it, transforming back into her bipedal form as she wrapped her one arm around her and continued to press her cheek against the side of Sophia's head, who was partially still stunned.

She held her sister tighter, pressing her forehead into her tiny shoulder till she could firmly feel her precious little bones that pressed against her skull. She was the real thing, right? It didn't feel like a figment of her dilutions, but wasn't she really sick? How was she up? Was she okay? Was she better?

How she wished she could ask her a lot of things, but she could feel her own disappointing inability to stop from trembling all over. She could only imagine the sounds that would come out if she tried to speak. She was just grateful she was awake right now. She didn't realize until more tears began running down her cheek that she'd been subconsciously preparing to find her sister dead when she got back.

She buried her head into her little sister's back and swallowed down the air from her mouth, feeling the little bit of familiar warmth radiating off her small body. She brushed her hair and held her close over and over again, struggling not to scare her with crying or screaming so she could stay holding her sister for a little bit longer.

"Baby.." she rasped.

Sophia's small blond brows frowned. Her lips trembled.

Her shoulders stiffened, and her eyes got a little glassy as she slightly lowered her arms.

She felt her big sister's hand petting the back of her head in response.

Her lips quivered again and pursed. She nibbled them into themselves and sucked them in as her eyes squinted and her brows pressed further.

Her small head felt heavy, so she let it rest on her older sister's shoulder, so her face was hidden and her eyes could just barely peek out past it to see her sister's back. She could see and feel her trembling a lot, though her sister was good enough at holding it in that she couldn't head any crying even when she listened hard.

Push!

She turned her body back and forth and struggled to free her one small arm free from the hug and up over the other side of Sonata's neck, awkwardly patting her back with her tiny hand.

She felt Sonata squeeze and then release a bundle of her hair, then take a deep breath. She watched what she could of her sister with wide, watchful eyes.

"Sis...?" she finally braved to break from the silence. "okie?"

She felt Sonata shake her head. Her eyes slowly got worried. She scrunched her brows and weakly began to wiggle free before stopping. She didn't know what to do.

"Sis... okie?" She asked again, with bigger concern.

There was a pause, and then she felt her sister shake her head again.

Sophia shook her head and wiggled to get her other hand free, hugging her sister with both her arms, her head still turned as much as it could to try and see her sister's face, eyes wide and lost and scared between her messy, twig laden curly hair. She tried to pat her back to comfort her, but she felt her sister suddenly tremble more. She felt her sister's head press against her back again.

WWHhhHHHHHhhhhhhhHH—

She heard a muffled sob mixed with a scream, that suddenly cut off.

Worried, Sophia tried to break free of her sister to see, but Sonata was much stronger with her, even with just one arm.

Huh..huh....WWHHhh—...HhhhHh.....HHhhhHHHHH—

Sophia tried to push her sister's shoulders away from her, but she felt her sister hug her tighter, and stopped.

HHhhh.....HHhhHhh.....

It went silent, and then she'd hear the cuts and pieces of her sister's muffled screams escape again, and then they'd be muffled.

Sophia's face scrunched and contracted instinctively into a crying shape as she shook her head to try and stop doing it, as she heard her sister cry.

Sophia hugged her older sister back, knowing nothing else to do. She pressed her head back down onto Sonata's shoulder and squeezed her eyes shut, patting her sister's back and then hugging her as she felt her body shiver and tremble painfully again and she tried not to cry too.

MMH—....mmmh...

The silence went on for longer than the past times, and just as Sophia began to wonder if it was finally over, she heard the tiniest of whines escape her own throat, and the weight of her sister's head lifted from her back.

Sophia could hear her sister breathing heavily.

She felt Sonata pet the back of her own head, and she hesitatingly looked up from the darkness of the shoulder.

Sonata used her hand to hold herself steady as she pulled away from her blond haired sibling, then to flick a leaf from her tangles. She put her hand on Sophia's cheek.

Stars, she was warm...

"Baby." She barely breathed, her body shaking.

Sophia stared at her wide eyed instead of her usual pout. Sonata couldn't tell if her sister was feverish or not from that one touch, her senses were too jumbled from the pain. She could just pick up heat. Whatever it was, at least there was heat. The last she'd seen her, Sophia on her own was so cold...

"Were you alone for a long time?" She managed to say, mostly out of courage than any sort of self control. She took deep, steady breaths and dug her toes into the gritty sand with occasional pebbles here and there. She thought better of it, but then dug her fingers into the sand, too, just to keep them occupied. It hurt to sit up, but it also hurt to be still, but if she didn't take care of her baby sister before she risked passing out again from pain or wolfing down more resources than she could manage to replace, everything she'd done so far would be for naught.

Sophia slowly nodded her head. Sonata's breath hitched, and the squeezed her eyes shut as she ducked her head downwards. The tiny child twiddled her fingers, then used her small voice. "Sis din wake up." She rubbed her face. For a, her voice came back, "...long time"

Hahh... Hah... Sonata regained her composure, looking out to the snowy, gloomy world outside. She couldn't tell the time just by looking. Her heart throbbed a little bit. She didn't know how long her sister had been awake and wondering around. She'd picked up scents that didn't belong to the cave, and those tiny sticks and branches, nor the wood chip stuck to her dress, had been there before. She didn't remember changing back to her dragon form. How much time had passed since she collapsed besides her sister and woke up again?

"... a full day?"

Sophia shook her head, bringing a confused look to her elder sister's face.

"I tried to 'wake up,' but, no, and...Ghhhhrrr" she pulled up her lips to imitate a snarl, "and, and, long!" She tried to explain, squeezing the end of her sister's tattered sleeve.

Sonata tried to filter through the blonde's baby talk. "I slept for a long time?" She hugged the shoulder of her injured side as she tried to rack her brain for memories of waking up. "I got up and slept again?"

Sophia shook her head harder. "No..." she crawled up so she was the few inches closer to her sister that she could get. "I tried 'wake up' but you no, and Ghhhhhhrrr, and" she made a sleeping jesture with her tiny hands, "and" she stretched out her hands. "Long."

Her puzzled sister echoed "long..?"

Sophia stood up and stomped her foot, nibbling her hands in mirror of her sister, which caused Sonata so suddenly become self aware and drop the hand she was nibbling at again.

"I tried to wake-up, but Sis wouldn't, and long t-" She stretched out her hands, getting on her tippy toes as through that could make them longer, hear breath coming more distressedly as she spoke too quickly to find her own words. Barely-tears slipped out of her right eye, which she tried to keep out of her voice. It was a skill she eas uncomfortably good at, for her tiny stature.

"Loooong."

She made eye contact with her sister, trying her best to explain. "Hurt" She rubbed her eyes, her lips twitching up to a pout two or three, her breath hitching as it came too quickly. She hugged her stomach.

"Whuh...I tried to... But no and, and grrrrr, and...hicc"

Sonata bit her lip, hugging her sister.

"Wh...whuh..." she rubbed her eyes and shook her head, drying to dry her cheeks to no avail. Sonata pulled the collar of her sister's dress into her tiny rubbing hand, which took it and began wiping down the tears she seemed to have surprisingly good control over.

"But you din wake up"

Sonata nodded.

"Aloooneeee...hic" the child cried as her sister pulled her back into a hug.

"And owieeeee"

Sonata's eyes widened, and she tried to pull away, but Sophia clung to her, the culmination of fear and anxiety overpowering whatever "owie" she'd been communicating, for a hug first.

Sonata patted her head, trying to calm the tiny one down without getting upset and starting the cycle again. "I'm sorry" she hid her face from view by pulling Sophia down and hugging her again.

Sophia nodded furiously into her hug, continuing to cry in waning hiccups. "Hungy"

"You're hungry?"

The little girl nodded into Sonata's chest, still whining and crying.

Had she eaten at all? It was unlikely to find a small, sickly child up and walking if she hadnt, but what could she have eaten? Had she tried to eat the half-frozen deer? Oh no, had she tried to use the knife?

Sonata checked on her tiny hands quickly.

"I'm sor-" she winced, turned her head downwards, and swallowed back the pain of her arm, mixed with a single heartbeat of the pain from her chest that came and went. She gripped Sophia's hand a little tighter. "Inconsiderate... of..."

The girl released hold on the tiny child pulled her up as she stood. She didn't bother hiding her shivering anymore as they made their way towards the remains of the carcass, she was sure Sophia had had more than enough time to observe the severity of her own injuries, even though the tiny bobble head-like creature's eyes were fixed forwards like the little doll she resembled.

Sonata pulled Sophia into her lap as she sat down, pulling out a gross mess of the animal's insides that clung to a vein of fat, blowing onto it as much as she could without melting the fat right off, cupping what she could of the drippings in her one hand, trying not to crush the meat anymore than it was. Her sister was tiny and frail, after all. She needed as much energy as she could get after sleeping and waking up alone for so long, not eating all the while, and could benefit from a little bit of baby fat back on that thin skin.

She brought her hand with the meat down to her sister's level, still cupping the runoff that overflowed and dropped down. She pressed it against Sophia's lips for her to drink, but her sister made pleading eye contact and shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut and turning away.

Sonata lifted her hand up to her own lips, tilted her head up, and drank it like a shot, Sophia scrunching her nose as she watched. She tried to rip the meat into smaller parts, but was only reminded of her absent arm. She tried to put the half cooked meat under pressure against her wrist with a part of her remaining left hand so she could pull, then opened her mouth and got close to tear it with her teeth, then rethought that motion.

Sophia's tiny hands reached up and held the part of the meat she'd been trying to secure of her own volition,and they tore it into tinier pieces together, Sonata fire-breathing the parts that needed it more before feeding them to her sister as they went.

Sophia ate without another complaint, this time, too hungry to be picky, opening her mouth in anticipation by the end like a baby bird.

Sophia took hold of another part of the carcass as her sister tore, Sonata having to stop and wait for her to figure out what she needed, now and then, but otherwise working as a team, like she could anticipate her sister's intentions without words.

Nom..monch monch monch

Sonata watched her sister as she swallowed down her food, scrunching up one side of her face or the other when she hit a gross textured part, or a part that was left cold from being frozen, the masses of deer meat she stuffed into that tiny mouth showing up beneath one cheek, then the other, as she chewed them down.

She poked her stuffed cheek.

The little being's head turned upwards as she swallowed down the last of her meal, eyes completely dilated.

She poked her cheek again.

Sophia pouted in a way that made Sonata think she was going to cry.

She laid down on her side, hugging the broken arm on her raised side.

"...too tired."

Sophia crawled up to her face and put Sonata's head in her hands.

She pressed one brow, eyes wide. "What if you don wakie?"

Sonata shook her head. "Lie down with me?"

Sophia swayed back and forth on her arms, tilting her head in a way that made her proportionately long hair trail on the ground. Finally, she said "okay," and curled up besides her sister.

Sonata smiled faintly, patting the top of her head.

Sophia watched her with big, dilated eyes in which she could see heartbeats, for a few moments, then looked up towards the ceiling of the cave, then around and began fidgeting. She turned her body around and dug with her knees and forearms into the sand, tried that self-designed spot, then turned around and twisted again. She finally stopped fidgeting as much when she laid on her belly with her arms wrapped around her head as a cushion, but then she rolled onto her side facing away from her sister.

Sonata watched as her relaxed-not-to-be-fidgety breathing turned to fast asleep breathing.

She played with her sister's messy hair, apparently the only price of her entire days alone, flicking pine needles and pebbles off as she tried to undo the never ending mess of curly tangles. But beyond the actual noticeable knots her sister's hair always seemed to make, it was sticky and sweaty and weighed down from not being washed all the time she'd been sick, and all the time she'd spent wandering around alone, and any food or messiness that had come in contact with it since.

Sonata cringed, trying to brush it out, but the oily look and sticky feeling remained, if not made worse. It was yucky, but it couldn't be helped. Sophia didn't fare well in the cold weather, so Sonata hadn't dared, and she was still too small to notice such things and give herself a bath.

Sonata frowned, shivering down another squeeze of pain, squeezing her own pale hair into her hand. Just as bad, she was acutely made aware of her own need for a hot bath and clean clothes, the sensation of the rough sand against her cheek and her bandages arm. Blood was stained all over her, against her skin and her clothes, stiffening together clumps of hair in ways that didn't make it feel like hair. Oily, dirty, covered in blood like a beast.

She felt overwhelmed all of a sudden. Every inch of her and everything around her felt disgusting and humiliating. She felt stuck; discarded and weak. Pitiful.

Small.