Chapter 49: It'd be better if I don't remember

"What? He did what?" Soobin and Yoongi were surprised and shouted together.

"It might be strange but he really sold me because of money. Money is everything to my dad. And he hates to admit that he had a daughter and believed that a daughter can't do anything but to be a burden for him. He makes money by gambling and every time he returns home, he always stays drunk. I tried my best to avoid him but he always came to me and scolded me even if I did nothing. Whenever he gets angry, he starts to break this and that and most of the time he used to beat me. I never said anything to him. Because my dad wasn't a bad guy before my mom escaped with another man." Beomgyu stopped for a while and looked above. Both of his listeners looked at the pitiful face of him though there was no heartbreaking sign on Beomgyu's face.

He started talking again while looking at the sky as if he was talking with the stars and the moon.

"He must have seen her shadow in me and maybe that's why he hated me so much. But it was getting unbearable day after day. So I told him I wanted to come to Seoul, but he had no money since he always lost huge amounts of money in gambling and liquor. I didn't know how much money others owed him. I tried to make him understand to leave the path he chose but he didn't want to even listen to me. And I know it was impossible for him too since he was under loads of loan.

However, It was getting unbearable to me everyday. There was nobody who would console me that everything will be fine. I had to deal with everything alone. I got a part time job to cover up our daily expenses because I knew I can't rely on my dad anymore. I stopped going to school since everyone hates me saying my mom is a filthy homewrecker and my dad is a gambler. But they didn't stop just by saying. My classmates threw trash on me and bullied me in different ways. This is why I stopped going to school and told my dad. But he didn't even care about it. It was like a very good news for him." saying this Beomgyu stopped and looked at Soobin. This time his eyes couldn't help but to get filled with tears. Seeing him like that, Soobin came closer to Beomgyu and hugged him. Though both of their faces had serious looks, Yoongi couldn't help but to chuckle as he was whipped by the two boys cuteness and also he understood that they were going beyond friendship.

"It's okay. You don't need to stress yourself too much. I wanna hear everything about you but not by hurting you. If it's making you uncomfortable, then don't say anything for now." Soobin comforted Beomgyu with his soft voice while patting on his back.

"Um-hm! Um-hm!" Yoongi reminded his presence by coughing as he thought others forgot about his presence. Hearing the coughing sound, Beomgyu pushed Soobin away as his face got red out of embarrassment.

"What happened after? How did you end up like this?" Yoongi asked as he guessed Beomgyu was willing to share right then and if his mind changed, he won't feel like sharing anymore. So, he wanted to know right then.

"Those were the worst days in my life but there was one person who was willing to be friends with me. Her name was Yoo Ji-min. Her nickname was Karina. When I spent time with her, I felt like I didn't need anything more. Actually, I was willing to live for her. Whenever I felt down, she came to comfort me. She was the one who always stayed beside me. But I was so ungrateful to her. I didn't want her as my friend. I grew feelings for her. Though I tried my best to keep those feelings in me, I couldn't. I exposed myself by my actions several times but she didn't want to understand. I never complained about it because all I wanted was to protect her and give her all the happiness that I was capable of. But, in the end....." Beomgyu stopped again and now he was looking at the ground with his shocked face.

"What happened in the end?" Soobin asked curiously.

"S-she sacrificed herself for me." Beomgyu said slowly.

"NO! She's still alive! I have to save her! M-Maybe I-I'm t-thinking too much. M-Maybe s-she's still waiting for m-me!" Beomgyu suddenly panicked while saying as he was triggered by his past and he remembered how he promised Karina that he'd go back and save her. But he forgot that he promised her more than two years ago.

"Yes, yes! We'll save her. Calm down! Calm down!" Soobin went to Beomgyu again and held his shoulder. Yoongi also came closer and put his hand on Beomgyu's back. We'll surely look for her, but you need to tell us more so that we can figure out something about her, right Soobin?" Yoongi looked at Soobin and gestured to him to console Beomgyu.

"Ah! Yes! Right you are!" Soobin replied. But suddenly they noticed, the boy stopped panicking and looked at them smilingly.

"Stop wooing me. Am I a four year old kid?" Beomgyu laughed out of the blue. But he really has the feeling that the two of them were adoring him just like a couple year's kid.

"I don't know about her but I want to find her even is she is dead. Don't worry. I know it's been a long so she's no longer waiting for me." Beomgyu sighed acted mature within no time. He continued,

"One day, my dad came home while shouting. He started breaking everything. And I was unlucky enough cause I just went home after finishing my job. When I went to stop him, he hit me hard and I fell on the ground. He came to me and pulled me up. His face was so scary. I never saw him like this. His eyes were red as if he was going to kill me. I didn't know what I did wrong that time. I was so scared that I didn't think much and tried to run away but he grabbed me saying that I ashamed him and he had no face to show people. I asked him what I did. Then I realized that someone slandered me and my best friend. They spread rumors that we have that kind of relationship and we often make money by selling our bodies. I have no idea who made the shitty rumor. I was okay with that cause I was used to it but I was in shock when I heard about Karina. I was very scared for her as I knew she won't be able to handle it and I was also scared what if she ends our friendship? I wanted to meet her, talk with her and console her at that time. But who knew the person who was ashamed of me a while ago, actually came to me for his filthy business?" Beomgyu sighed once again as if he was at a loss of his words but his listeners got too curious what happened next. So they both were looking at him with their questionable eyes. Though Yoongi had so many things to ask Soobin, he forgot everything since he was way too curious about Beomgyu.

"Business?" Both Soobin and Yoongi asked out of curiosity.

"Hm. Actually, that day he lost another gamble but he had no money so he gambled with something without thinking or maybe because he wanted to get rid of that. He gambled on me and he lost. He told me to follow him and as I didn't know what was going on, I followed him. Then, I realized that I had been sold. And they looked quite scary. I begged and cried to my dad again and again not to hand me to them. But nobody listened to me."

"When they were dragging me with them, someone came to save me. I had no idea Karina was following me from the beginning. She tried to stop those goons to save me. It helped me to get free but she got caught instead of me. I promised her that I'd bring help but I was so useless that I got caught again and ended up in front of your dad." Beomgyu looked at Soobin and said,

"Did they torture you a lot? Harass you? I helped you to escape so how did you end up like this?" Soobin asked. In reply, Beomgyu stayed silent but his silence was telling him that there was something that he didn't want to mention or remember. Now Beomgyu regrets why he took the therapy earlier. His life was perfect at this point. Then which mad dog bit him so that he needed to remember everything? It'd be great if he doesn't remember about everything at all.