TBBM XXXII. Jopet V2.0

"I'll take my Jap from here," James declared.

My Jap?

My Jap?

My Jap?

Did he just call me his Jap?

Possessive pronoun!?

We drove quietly as we made our exit from the mall to the main highway. I looked out the window and rekindled that fateful night when I was punished to walk kilometres to our home. Similarly, I wondered if that could happen to me again now that I looked like this? Would it be difficult for him if I looked anywhere close to that beautiful girl he was pining for? I still felt nervous and bitter as I lavished in that memory.

"How do you like your new phone?" James spoke, beneath that smile.

"I really haven't gotten my hands deep in it---"

"I thought so. You seemed surprised when I called."

I watched him smile. His eyes looked like squinting every time he smiled. He looked perfect.

"What?" he asked as I was staring at him.

"Nothing. Just admiring you," I looked away. "How do you like the new me?"

"It's perfect---not because you look a certain way, but because you looked very happy in it. That's all I want."

I looked down, hiding my pleasantry in the cover of my hair.

+++

My mother stayed out late in the stall so she had no idea what I did later today. The hairstylist said that the medicine should stay in my head for about two to three days; hence, I carefully laid my hair above my pillow before I actually lied to my back.

I'll take my Jap from here.

I'll take my Jap from here.

I'll take my Jap from here.

But I couldn't bring myself to focus on getting rested. James. I kept seeing him in my mind.

I'll take my Jap from here.

I'll take my Jap from here.

I'll take my Jap from here.

I wriggled at every corner of my bed fighting the desire to scream.

"Possessive Pronoun," I spoke, muffled. "Did he want to own me?"

+++

I woke up the next morning after a measly three hours of solid sleep, nearly immobile due to neck pains. I had to stretch my head in a circular motion until it was bearably less stiff. I crawled my way to face the mirror to see if everything was just a dream.

"Bellissima," I did poses in front of the mirror; the same as those Roma sported yesterday.

"Do you know what time it is for you to be posing---"

"Good morning, Mother!" I greeted her warmly.

"Jo-jopet!? Is that you?" I saw her face morphed from her usually sarcastic to a totally disoriented look.

"It's just me, Mother," I flipped my hair. "You flatter me."

"My daughter," she cupped my face in her hands, not minding the ladle that fell on the floor. "You used to look like a chimpanzee... but now. Look at you! Let me take photos of you."

"Chimp!?" I flipped my hair again. Angie used to act like that in front of me. It was fun. "Stop praising me already, okay? I've had enough of admirations."

Admiration. Didn't every soul just yearn for a little bit of admiration? Wasn't it good to be admired even just by a select few? I wondered, if everyone felt loved and valued and admired, would the world still have bullies like Angie? or someone selfish like Red? or a gossiper like Ma-ho? If only everybody received enough love to begin with, could I imagine a world with no harm in it?

In no time, I found my way out of our home, opened my mother's lacey umbrella and walked slowly on our street, making sure everybody had the chance to see me. The sun shone brightly amid the soft stretch of white clouds in the sky. I could hear the birds chirping up on the treetops, telling of a good weather. The wind blew mildly in full respect of my hair. It was like slow-motion.

The water delivery guy was passing by with his cart of water gallons---he lost grip of it as his eyes were on me. The man selling morning soya couldn't count the change correctly as he kept looking at me. The boys on the bike lane bumped into each other as they focused on me, instead of the road.

I kept hiding my laughter under the gorgeous waves of my hair every now and then. It wasn't nice to be causing accidents but it was fun to be somebody that people wanted to see.

Eventually, I saw Ma-ho walking my direction. I knew she had something to say again. She had opinions on almost everything but herself.

"Wow!?" she croaked. "ASG!"

"Huh?" I didn't pick up on that.

"After-sex-glow," she cracked. "Seems like you took hold of the chance. See. What did I tell you? When the opportunity presents itself, people like you should double time and grasp it. You know? Handsome men don't always come around."

"Do I look like I need that?" I flipped my hair, dropping her discourse. He language did not befit this beautiful morning. I couldn't bear listening to her without getting sickly.

I also saw Domops and Ferds walking home, highly probably coming from an overnight's streak of alcohol. They exchanged nasty looks as they saw me.

"Hey Jop---"

"Don't talk to me!" I cut them before they even started talking.

I turned left and willed to continue my walk to the bus stop when somebody honked at us.

"Looks like somebody's in trouble," James rolled down his window.

"J-jim?" I marvelled. "We didn't talk about coming to school today."

"Hop in," he invited me, while making fierce eye contact with the drunk men.

I skipped the usual pleasantries and jumped right in to the front seat for fear that the two might do something to his car.

"What's with the boots?" his eyes were full of questions. "You're becoming unrecognisable."

"Y-you don't like it?" I puppy-eyed.

"I didn't say that. I just..." he made face. "You look allot like puberty now."

"That's weird?"

"No. That's cute on you."

"C-cute on me?" this kind of hair came handy. I could live hiding my giggles in it.

Dear Saint,

Can you make each day like this, please?

Today, we were off to a field day in Earth Science. I and James weren't classmates in this subject so I planned to make sure that I'd text him often. I knew I'd miss him.

Youngsters my age would kill for school trips. Every chance they got to officially have fun outside the classroom with their friends sounded like heaven to them. I couldn't tell how it'd go for me but I remained optimistic.

James dropped me by Gate 3, the boarding place. It looked like a concert ground filled with people who enrolled to the same course code.

I wasn't sure why he'd do that but James opened the door on my side and helped me on my way out.

"Take care," he ran his palm on my head while he looked around. "You... should keep me posted in case you're in trouble."

"T-trouble?" I copied him. Was he actually thinking about 'him'?

My classmates froze at the sight of me and James.

"Oh my G!" Cliffy walked near me.

"Winner," Ray followed him at once. "What happened to you? You frequently give the professors absences now then you come back that gorg!?"

Soon, the class circled me. Roma stayed on one side quietly giving me a thumbs up.

"I love the look!" Cliffy examined my get up. "You glow in love."

Betty and Hugo nodded. Cy and Noriella were clapping. The guys were making fake moves on me.

Everyone was just so nice. I felt like drowning in the attention. But also, it all felt foreign to me. I didn't really like being the center of anything.

It went on like that for about fifteen minutes until one of the professors called for attention.

"Paging Magat, third year."

M-me? I cluelessly obliged and headed to the entrance, passing by layers of students who were all waiting to board the buses. Oddly, being pretty and being ugly both gave me the same chills in the spine, as both drew attention.

"There she is," Nina greeted me with a kiss on the cheek. She stood outside with her boyfriend, Seb. "I hope you're fine."

"Come on!" Seb approached us. "Looks hell she is! Is it just my eyes or you really did come all glammed up today?"

"Uhm... you can say that. I guess," I fake laughed.

"Sssh---" Nina stopped him. "You're making her uncomfortable."

"I'm just being honest," he embraced me, then offered a handshake. "We're good. We're good."

"So, what brought you here?" I finally asked.

"I---uhm," Seb looked for words. "I taught Red a lesson. He swore not to go crazy inhumane like that and---"

"I don't really... want to talk about that, if I may," my heart sank.

"Look. He's sick," Nina interrupted. "His parents called us asking if we were hanging out. They woke up and he's gone. We totally have no idea where he'd go... except here. To you, maybe?"

Suddenly, it worried me.

"Let me back up a little bit," Seb looked serious. "If this were any consolation, Red said that he thought you'd contact the 'basketball player' to rescue you that night. He looked really guilty when he realised that it didn't turn out that way."

"We're not saying this only because he's our friend. You're our friend now, too. But listen to this, the moment he realised that you didn't have a phone with you and that you were probably walking in the rain, he went out and looked for you."

"He looked for me?"