Chapter 3: Convenience Mate

Ravyn POV

Six heads peeping into the room aroused Ravyn's maternal instincts. Her family was lurking, with Patch the most obvious, especially the way he attempted to blend in with the pale golden door frame. Those mischievous brown eyes always gave him away.

"It's alright," she said to the gawking heads. "Just a bit of trouble sleeping is all. Nothing that old-fashioned witch remedies can't fix. Go back to bed."

"Are you sure?" Lilia asked, stifling a yawn. 

"We heard sounds of trouble," Patch added. 

Jude deliberately lowered his head, pretending to be fascinated by the shades of blue and violet in the tanzanite egg. "I thought you all would be exhausted from the celebration."

"We have dozens of pups in the house," Jiro observed from his spot above Patch's head. 

Patch's pink-haired mate Anneliese added wryly, "I think we're all beyond exhaustion."

Dane's blue eyes swirled with concern for his friend. "Is there something we need to know?"

Ravyn gave her a reassuring smile. "It's nothing to worry about."

"Really?" Wide-eyed Dirge looked doubtful. "Because we saw him sleepwalking–"

Lilia snorted. "If Mother says she's got it under control, you can trust that. Go back to your new bride."

The other Crestas all started to chatter at once, their voices full of worry for their friend. When Patch stuck his neck into the room, he bumped his head against a shimmering forcefield Ravyn conjured. "OW!"

"Shoo, all of you," Ravyn ordered in her best Pack Mother manner. "GO."

One by one the six heads retreated and Ravyn waited until all the doors had shut before she drew a circle with her hand and the forcefield vanished. Gently closing the door, she returned to sit by Jude. "Now, where were we?"

"My quest to find a Luna for my pack."

He sounded miserable about the idea and her heart went out to him. "Be careful about just asking for 'a Luna.' You might get someone you can't stand."

Jude put on a brave face. "That's why I came to you. Surely, you wouldn't select anyone that I would dread eating dinner with, much less inviting them into my home and my bed. I don't have to love her or feel the mate pull, but I do need to like her and be able to see eye to eye on ruling the Silverpaws."

Ravyn gave him an old-fashioned look. "Wouldn't you rather seek a fated mate?"

"NO." The growl took her aback. "Haven't you been listening? I don't want to replace Emer! Goddess. I thought I would spend my life with her and someday watch our grandchildren rule the pack. The way she could organize feasts … the way we used to laugh together … her knack for pinning me to the floor the moment before I was about to make a colossal blunder … I can't just substitute that with another fated mate."

The smell of his sage hit her powerfully then, rising above the cleansing, fresh scent of the blue frankincense. Why did his cologne bewitch her so? She wasn't a young awkward witch just out of school. 

But his soulful brown eyes pierced her heart.

"You understand," he said in an assertive tone. "You haven't accepted another man into your life since that scoundrel deserted you and your child. You did your duty by your Witch Circle community and raised Lilia to become a heroine and a Luna. Now, your entire life revolves around the packs that claim you and the grandchildren that I see clinging to you. You helped vanquish the biggest threat to shifters everywhere apart from the Dark Goddess herself."

His insightful words made her admire him–and curse his perceptiveness. "Even though I still have my shop, the pack occupies far more of my time and thoughts, as you say."

He tapped his heart. "And this."

"Exactly. The pack is everything to me–because my family is here. You've grown up with that soul-deep connection to your wolf brothers and sisters. I had to discover it as an outsider. But I understand it, just the same–my grandchildren belong to this pack. I have sons that I love dearly as well. And daughters."

He grinned. "As I said, you understand in a way few people do. Are you sure you weren't secretly born a shifter?"

"Positive. And the point of all this flattery would be?"

"I don't flatter," he growled.

"Ha! Lilia called you a born charmer from the minute she met you."

He softened. "Now who's flattering whom? And you didn't see her get down on all fours and sniff my tail when we arrived for that fateful war council against the Crimsontails."

Ravyn smiled. "I can picture her doing that, even without people constantly regaling me with the story. But we're straying so far from the subject we need a lantern to find our way back."

Jude howled with laughter. "I never knew you were so funny."

Heat bloomed in her cheeks at this deluge of male attention after years in a dry desert. "So, you want to find a mate the way most of the world does. No mate pull."

His eyes turned to brown stones. "And bucking thousands of years of shifter tradition. But I don't give a d*mn if you or Eirika or the Moon Goddess disapprove. I can't … I can't go through that again with a mate. Not to mention my son is already on the shakiest of ground. Mali hides it better, but she's also hurting."

Lilia had done the same thing. She'd stared out the shop window while polishing the crystals, looking for her father. While she read herself hoarse, she'd no doubt wished for her father to come home. That was why Ravyn learned to hide her broken heart. And she hadn't had this pressure to remarry after she gave up on Daxius coming home.

"You have the right to be happy," she said gently.

* * * * *

Jude POV

How could he make her understand? Why didn't she look in the mirror and see the heartbreak in her own eyes?

"It's not about being happy," he scoffed.

"Really? Then everything I've ever heard about the importance of having a loving mate as your Luna is wrong, I gather. Love saved both Jiro and Garnet–and their pack."

Spots of color bloomed on his chiseled cheeks. "The Crimsontails were a mess!"

"And your voice reeks of desperation as though your pack was on the brink of collapse–but we both know it isn't."

He summoned up patience. "I'd rather not have it burning down if I can help it, thank you. I'm trying to plan for the future. At some point my son will stop chasing his tail and do his duty. Maybe if he sees me moving forward, he'll get the hint."

Ravyn sat back, projecting unruffled calm. "What are you afraid of? That if you fall in love he'll go rogue?"

He shot to his feet, letting the egg crash to the floor. "My son would NEVER go rogue. He wouldn't even know how!"

He didn't need her to bring up Cyran, and mercifully, she didn't. Instead she asked, "What did she make you promise?"

"That I wouldn't be alone. Also, that I would find a Luna who loves our pack as much as I do. That's all I need. A companion and a Luna."

"I think you're confusing what you need with what you want," she said gently.

Moon Goddess! He'd never thought Ravyn Rolfe would be this exasperating. True, she could be a fighter, especially when she believed in something … like now, for instance.

"What I need AND want is what humans, elves, and every other race call a 'marriage of convenience.'" he argued.

Arcturus turned away from him, not deigning to acknowledge him. 

"And how often do those marriages create the very sorrow they're meant to prevent?" Ravyn asked gently. "You spoke about the moments with your Emer. I saw you two together. You lit up a gathering. If you should find that kind of happiness in a 'marriage of convenience,' will you reject it?"

He bared his teeth. "I don't know because the person I've asked for help is sitting here throwing snares in my path! How can I find happiness when we haven't even started looking for a mate?"

She wouldn't let up. "You deserve to be happy, Jude. You deserve love. You've given your heart and soul to your people, and you've led them even when memories of Emer tormented your sleep."

He paced, unable to look at her. If he let himself drown in the amethyst sea of her eyes, he might just …

What? Kiss her again?

His wolf nodded smugly.

Ravyn continued. "Dane didn't settle for a 'marriage of convenience' to Azandra, and she didn't just accept her parents' choice of Marcus Mond."

A low roar burst from Jude's throat at the mention of the Wintertail Pack Alpha, who had given the Crestas such trouble. "Again, that's different."

"Why? Because they're all younger? I thought shifters would have a more enlightened attitude about love and sex as we age. You live at least as long as witches do."

She'd hit a nerve. "What do you take me for, a shallow, short-sighted HUMAN?"

"You're talking like one," she said, with a wolf-like bite in her voice.

Whirling around, he confronted her. She stood, proud and regal and self-assured. What a woman. She didn't back down.

"Maybe I am," he confessed, surprising them both. "But on the other hand, I'd hardly be the first shifter to think of alliances and strengthening the pack when taking a mate. My Emer was the niece of the previous Alpha of the Oak Ridge Prowlers, as you know."

"Yes, I know."

A loving smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. "But that wasn't the reason I chose her–or at least not my only reason. You can ask Dane, Kyon, and Jiro about the story of how I courted Emer–and how she won in the end."

Ravyn was suddenly nose to nose with him, and her pine forest perfume fogged his brain. He did deep breathing and pressed his solar plexus to stay present. 

"You're telling me now that you're willing to swear off that kind of love for the rest of your life?" she asked.

"I need a mate to strengthen the pack and keep my promise to Emer. I've had one great love and that's enough for a lifetime." His eyes searched hers. "If you're truly a friend to our people, help me find my Luna."