The Adventures of William Wander

William, in his mid thirties, was an account manager for a fairly large bank and managed loans for said bank, while he didn't love his job he also didn't hate it, most of the time it is paperwork and just rarely he got into conflicts with the clients he had. So when he got out of the bed and made him self ready for work he was just a bit disgruntled because of the day of work that was to come and very much annoyed at the weather present, it was raining cats and dogs.

He went, sleepy with many thoughts in his head, down from his rented flat to his car. When he got there his car didn't turn on. "shit" he said, but he wasn't that surprised the car was old after all and it often had its days when it wouldn't turn on. And normally he wouldn't be even that mad at it, but his bike got stolen just last week, so he had to walk the four kilometers to the bank where he was working. When he got there he greeted his colleagues with his thoughts still ranting about his car and turned his PC on and started to work.

So he did for a couple of hours until an Email came to his Mail-entrance. It was from a man who would nearly write him on a daily basis. He didn't even know that man personally, all he knew that the man was a father of 2 children and that he couldn't pay his loan because of the drinking habit he had. While it was a terrible fate that the man had, William couldn't do anything about it. And so he started to write the same answer to him, he wrote to him the dozen times before. But unluckily the correspondence didn't end there upon his reply the man threatened him he would kill him if he didn't cancel his debt, even that was not a new conversation with him, it was every day the same this guy would ask for a postponement, and he would say it wasn't in his might to decide about such things. At that he would get mad and start to drink if he had drunk enough he would start to write him such nasty things.

So all in all it was a typical Monday to him and when he threatened him again he didn't even bother to read it and just put the mail in his spam folder. William continued in his work until he couldn't keep his addiction in check anymore. So he went out to the bank and started to light himself a cigarette while mumbling about that it would kill him some day.

Thinking about this particular Monday, he mused about whether he should have stayed in his bed this morning. So while he stood there dreamy lost and in thoughts he registered the screaming people pretty late. Well too late to be exact while other citizens ran past him, he at least wanted to know what they were running from, so he turned around to see a car heading straight at him. With his cigarette still in his hands he thought about how he could avoid the car and how the driver would lose control of a car that bad that it would straight head into a bank that was full of people. That was until he saw who was driving said car. It was the man whom he had daily correspondence with. And at that moment he also realized he couldn't flee. The car was aimed at him. So the last thing he did was one last puff from his cigarette before the car hit him and his whole world turned black.

He didn't know how long it was black around him, and he couldn't perceive anything. But one thing he knew, it sure felt like an eternity. All alone with his mind he started to think about his life and with the time he had at hand he started to question every single choice he had done in his life. When he was done contemplating about his life he started to think about philosophical questions, did he still count as alive if there was no input from outside, are Electronic cars amoral because if some jackass tries to run over some pedestrian they cannot hear the engine of the car.

Questions about math and physics even if he didn't like the subjects as much he had enough time on hands, so he even tried himself at those subjects. And so did the time go on William had no one to talk to and started to get scarred if he might get insane if it didn't stop at all. At some point he even tried to stop think completely in the hope that it possibly end his pitiful existence. But it was all for nothing, the only thing it did to him was that his thoughts became a lot more focused than they were before. When everything else was done, and he had no idea to keep himself entertained anymore he started counting, and he didn't stop.

That was all he did he didn't know how much time had passed, but he thought he got to one billion a lot quicker than then the time he needed to think about some subjects he had pondered upon. He was near 1 trillion when he thought we would go insane.

He felt a light coming at him. How does one feel a light ? He didn't know, but he knew it felt like that. William started to get exited he either got a new accompany or he went insane both meant for him that his boredom would stop. And so William rushed to the light and was very excited to see what it was. He observed it and now he could see it. The light grew at a visible rate. That was so interesting to him, but he also knew to be wary of the light. Once he touched it he felt tremendous pain and felt like he had forgotten something. Now he would watch the light with excitement. He grew scared of it. With each passing though he now knew the light was taking the very space he needed to be existing. And so he kept pondering was this the moment to end it all ? Or should he try to fight it ? He wasn't sure, and so he waited and waited.

The light was now as bright as a sun and caused him such pain that he couldn't stand it anymore. And so his fight began. He tried to absorb the light like it absorb him but it didn't work. All he got from the light where heightened senses he now could feel other energies around him, but the light kept eating the very memories that made him who he was. William grew scared and now tried to build one of those mental castles he read about in his childhood. It worked. Or so he thought, the light now devoured him much slower than before and because they both took in the whole space it wasn't growing as much. Now with again more time at hand he tried to use the energies he could feel because of the light to scan the surrounding area. But the moment he did the light now seemed enraged and started its onslaught from again but now with the weird energies. He fled straight into his mind castle and tried to wait out the attack. But his enemy seemed to have infinite stamina. Neither his will to attack nor the weird energies seemed to cease. And so he began to cast aside his memories until only a few remained. Who was he ? He was named William What did he do for a living ? I don't know. Who were your parents ? I was an orphan but an old matron named Cheryl cared for me like I was her own child. What do you want ? I want to live and never get back to that nothingness. All other thoughts and memories were used to protect his being.

And so began his fight back, and so he fired his memories at the light. At first, he used his least dear memories, the trauma and pain he experienced. He wanted to feed that damn light with the same pain he had felt. Next came boring memories he had and boy did he have a lot. So he used the memory of him counting against the light. He didn't even get to three billion when he noticed that the light started to tremble. The moment he saw that, he knew that he was on the right track, and so he did shoot half of his counting memories at the light until said light exploded into a thousand pieces.

He began to absorb it, and he grew more and more disgusted at himself. He now understood what the light was. The light was a soul and a young one at that it started to grow in his new body. But he William had killed in his ignorance and cowardice his fear of the unknown had caused him to kill a newborn soul. Once he collected all the pieces of the poor light his senses became more profound he could now hear and kick. And now he was certain that he had killed a newborn child. And so he cried. Cried about the lost soul. Cried about the life that was wasted. And cried about himself being such a pathetic being.

Out of this sadness and grief he draws a new conviction. He couldn't let this life be wasted. He had to life that life to the fullest. That was what he owed to the little light. One thing however still crept him out. The energies he was feeling before were still there and much more profound than they were before. And so he tried to influence these energies and while doing, so he thought about the novels he had read in the past. Was he maybe put into one of those fantasy worlds or did he now completely lose his mental?