Look what the storm blew in

I rush into Kohls hoping to beat the rain. The storm front looks like it is going to deliver a punishing blow and my shoes are not built for that. A hundred and one things are going through my mind as I try to reevaluate my evening and what I can possibly accomplish and what will have to wait till tomorrow. I walk towards the back of the store as quickly as possible, hoping and praying there won't be a line and I won't have to wait. I see a woman approach the counter. Whew, I should be able to get in and out quickly! .... and then I round the corner.

Its almost a visceral response. Right in front of me is someone who probably knows me better than anyone. Someone who can understand the depression, impulses, mania. So many questions....Are you ok? What happened? Why no responses?

I stand there watching your interaction with the other customer with 10,000 emotions rolling through me and mostly likely across my face. Wondering what will happen once you see me. You go about your business with the customer. I've registered in your peripheral as another customer as you go through the same monotonous routine. The customer walks away and I stand there waiting for you to see me, real see me.

You look up and are about to go through your usual motions . You look confused for a moment. Possibly, because I haven't moved from my spot, feet firmly glued to the floor. Maybe, its the range of emotions playing across my face. But, then it hits you. You register who I am and now it's your turn to run the gauntlet of emotions.