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System of Misfortunes

Welcome to the world of absolute, merciless, mind-boggling, unimaginable, but sometimes funny ABSURD, where reality turns into madness and logic becomes an illusion! Crazy system, which is probably aware of everything that is happening and tries to slip you some debuff or useless ability is there? Yup. Rulers who are mentally comparable to the inhabitants of a mental hospital and heroes who look more like criminals are there? Yup. Once here, don't try to understand this world, it has its own crazy rules and atmosphere, better get ready to fight for SURVIVAL, because even harmless looking cakes may turn out to be mimics who are hungry for human flesh! Your flesh! Get ready for an incredible adventure in a world where every step becomes a challenge, and where you are not always welcome. I hope you're ready to face and overcome absurdity to survive in this crazy reality, because we are about to start!

Yakub_Taran · Fantaisie
Pas assez d’évaluations
21 Chs

Church

The church building looked majestic and gloomy, built of stone painted in ink-black color.

Its spire, topped with a bell tower, reached far into the sky, making the church the tallest building in the city.

Above the door through which we were about to enter, a sacred symbol was carved into the stone – a tower more resembling a lighthouse.

As we entered, we saw only one person, a man in a black and green priest's robe, leaning over the altar and the sacred symbol in prayer, but our arrival distracted him.

"Paladin?" the priest only said, turning to us.

He was a short bald man with thick lips and an aquiline nose, his voice was low and resonant.

"I am so glad you managed to get here in such dire times, the church now is the only safe place, I was just praying for salvation-..." the priest was saying, but was interrupted by Jeanne.

"Enough, I was at the Festival," those words were enough to make the priest's face take on a cold expression. "But you know, I wonder why did you decide to betray your faith?"

With these words, Jeanne stepped forward from the rest of the group, her sword shimmering with warm light, causing the priest to squint.

"I did not betray God, they betrayed Him, worshiping the Deceiver," the priest uttered.

With each word, he gradually changed. He grew larger, the skin on his face and hands tore apart and new skin appeared in its place, causing his body to be covered in layers of shedding skin.

The number of his arms and legs increased and sharpened. Eventually, he resembled a gigantic praying mantis, his priestly robe seemingly replaced by layers of a dead skin.

"They deserved such a fate," the monster finished his sentence. His voice became more like a growl.

The sight of such transformation shocked me, but I was able to recover fairly quickly. Have I grown accustomed to such things?

"I'll distract him, go upstairs," Jeanne said quietly.

I nodded, then ran towards the staircase to the second floor. It was located to the left of the door through which we entered.

At that moment, wings like those of an insect burst out from behind the priest's back, and he quickly flew towards us.

At that moment, Jeanne jumped in front of us, blocking our group.

When these two collided, we had already rushed to the second floor.

...

Just before the collision, I raised my sword in the air and swiftly swung it at the approaching monster.

I struck it in the shoulder, and my sword went through it like a hot knife through butter. There was a distinct hissing sound, and its cry of pain filled the air.

However, this didn't stop it from crashing into me and slamming me into the wall. Despite my good strike not cleaving it in half, my sword, passing diagonally through its shoulder, stopped at the creature's heart.

Unfortunately, due to the effects of the fog and its own powers, the wound, which seemed critical, began to heal rapidly, and my sword became stuck inside the monster's body as if mired in a swamp.

At that moment, the grotesque creature looked at me with its eyes, clearly relishing my predicament.

It raised its hand, which was devoid of fingers and sharpened like a spear, and struck downward at me.

In that moment, I sharply pulled my glowing sword, slicing through the monster's body and parrying its blow, severing one of its limbs.

Despite its quick regeneration, it still felt pain, almost deafening me with its sreams.

Instead of stopping my assault, I continued, severing the monster's limbs and leaving deep wounds on its torso. This forced the monster to use its wings and fly away from me.

"Burn!" I cried out.

[You have used the ability Word of God, spending a quarter of your health! You have 15/20 health points left.]

This ability is available to every paladin after initiation, when young paladins are ready to take an oath to the Lord to protect believers and spread faith in Him.

As soon as I spoke this word, the flying enemy burst into flames and fell to the ground.

A powerful blow struck my heart, and I felt intense pain, but it was not so much physical as it was spiritual. It was the recoil for using the Word of God.

However, surprisingly, the enemy did not intend to die. For every centimeter of burnt skin, its body produced two centimeters of new tissue.

The fire extinguished very quickly, giving way to the monster's new flesh.

The once soft, almost liquid skin turned into a heavy shell. Nothing remained of its once human face; a sharp horn grew on its head, its wings were gone, but human hands now protruded from its back, ready to grab me and immobilize me.

"Self-ignition!"

I felt a sudden, sharp pain, which also disappeared suddenly. My body ignited, leaving behind only charred flesh and a skeleton blackened by flames.

However, this fire did not touch my spiritual body, thanks to which I could still act actively even without muscles. It takes paladins years of rigorous training to learn this ability.

[You have used the ability Self-ignition! Your wisdom has doubled, all attacks and abilities related to holiness, fire, and light have become more effective, any enemy's attack on you ignites them!]

These bonuses became even more significant, considering that many of my skills were affected by the wisdom multiplier, including the Word of God.

...

When we got to the second floor, we felt a shaking, as if from a minor earthquake. It seemed they collided with each other. We needed to act quickly while Jeanne could still fight.

The second floor consisted of a dining hall about half the size of the first floor. I suppose the other half of the floor was occupied by the kitchen.

In the dining hall, besides us, there were two more people. The mayor, who managed to eat something even in such a situation, and his ever-present butler, who held a tray of food in his hands.

"Dear guests, it's you again," nodded the mayor in our direction. "Sit down and taste this wonderful fasting food."

"Thank you, sir, but we must decline," I shook my head.

I tried to do it as politely as possible, so as not to provoke him. After everything that had happened in the city, he looked very unstable.

Literally. I saw something crawling under his skin, at moments of silence, there was a rumbling coming from his body, sometimes he swelled up as if he would explode, and then returned to normal, leaving stretch marks on his skin.

His butler looked much better in this regard. Essentially, the only difference from his past self was his inflamed, unblinking eyes.

For quite some time, neither the mayor nor the butler said anything after our refusal, so I decided to take the first step toward the stairs to the next floor, which this time were to the right of us.

"Dear guests?" the mayor looked at us inquisitively. "I didn't notice you. Please, sit at the table and taste the wonderful fasting food on this great day of victory."

He completely lost his mind.

Once again, I politely declined the mayor's offer, but this time, he reacted differently.

"You're refusing me?" he said in surprise. "I think I've figured out where this is all going. You will stay here either as guests or as dishes."

With these words, the mayor stood up from the table. This time, he looked even more unsettling than before. The rumbling inside his body intensified, his eyes looked in different directions.

Along with him, the butler pulled out a whip from his pocket, and menacingly cracked it against the ground.

"I'll hold them off," said Uncle Jack, stepping forward.

"I'll help," Adele nodded to me, staying on the floor. "Go."

I didn't say anything to her and just nodded, rushing upstairs.

"Lady and gentlemen," the mayor's resonant voice echoed, "let the strongest win."

...

The third floor was a wide corridor consisting of doors. They must have been the monastic cells of church servants. Considering the priest's betrayal, an unpleasant fate awaited them.

The rest of the floor was empty, so I quickly headed upstairs.

The fourth floor was something like an attic. It was filled with various paintings covered with cloth. Perhaps they were icons?

In the center of the room stood a spiral staircase leading straight up.

I climbed higher and higher up the spire until I reached the bell tower.

From here, I had a view of the entire city, which was shrouded in fog, making it impossible to see anything clearly.

I immediately grabbed the rope to which the bell's clapper was attached above me, then slightly opened my mouth to avoid being deafened by the sound wave. This is explained by the buildup of pressure in the ear, so opening the mouth helps distribute this pressure.

When I began to strike the bell, the sound was truly deafening.

As soon as I glanced back at the city, I noticed the fog gradually receding towards the city center, but at the same time, it seemed to deliberately envelop the human figures on the streets. Only a few of them were heading towards the church.

I struck the bell again with doubled force, but once again, only those closest to the church responded to the call.

This was bad. If this continued, the whole story with the church would be in vain.

Frantically, I looked at my stats and abilities, trying to find some solution.

At that moment, the only solution that came to mind was to activate the Murderous Feast to enhance my physical attributes and strike the bell even harder and faster.

[You activated the Murderous Feast ability, your strength and dexterity stats increased by +10! Your strength and dexterity stats have reached 15 and 17 respectively.]

I began to ring the bell with renewed strength, and those marked on the streets of the northern part of the city did start making their way towards the church, albeit rather slowly. But I didn't see anyone coming from the east or west.

Just in case, I also activated the Provocateur, since it wasn't consuming anything anyway.

[You activated the Provocateur ability! Anyone who sees you and cannot resist their own anger towards you will suffer from the Provoked effect, which will increase their strength, dexterity, and endurance by +5, but decrease their intelligence by -1, making you their priority target.]

At that moment, those who were already heading towards the church stopped. Then, a series of roars and inhuman screams, much louder than the tolling of the bell, echoed throughout the northern part of the city.

After that, all the monsters within my sight rushed towards the church at great speed. They were provoked! At least this ability came in handy now.

However, even those who hadn't seen me and were in the west or east, upon hearing the series of screams, also dashed towards the church, albeit more slowly.

The fog had now completely concentrated only in the city center and no longer marked the figures of the monsters.

[You have lost the Strange Regeneration effect!]

With this notification, I went downstairs to help my team and finally escape from this city.