Chapter 2: Missed call

'As you guys walked, Amelia asked if you were hungry. You guys ate together. Exchanged phone numbers…' John said, breaking my story narration.

'What? How do you know this?' I said. A waiter saw us out on the balcony. He came to us with a tray of drinks. Despite John's attempts to stop me, I picked up a glass of whisky.

'Oye, brother, please. You ordered a cheese pizza. She ordered a garlic pizza. The garlic pizza wasn't good. You gave her your cheese pizza. The rest is history. Let's go in. I am turning to ice here.'

He hugged himself. I took a big sip of scotch. It went down my throat like a little ball of fire.

'Have a drink,' I said, 'it will make you feel less cold.'

'Not really. Alcohol actually leads to heat loss. It is heat coming out that makes your skin feel warm.'

'My Fat boyfriend, seriously, stop the chemistry. It's New Year's Eve,' I said. I brought the glass close to his mouth. He looked at me once, then with great reluctance took a sip.

'Good job, my beer,' I said. 'So you know about the cheese pizza too? You want to know about our next meeting? The first real date?'

'Please, no, dude Let's hang out with the other staff inside. They already think we are antisocial.'

'Screw them. We freaking hate this job,' I said. 'How do you expect us to socialise?'

'Let's talk to them a little bit.'

'In a minute. I just need to make a call.'

I pulled out my phone. I opened Amelia's contact. John saw her picture.

'No, dude, no.' He reached for my phone. I ran ahead of him as he clumsily and unsuccessfully chased me.

'Brother, I swear. You are not calling her. are you?'

'It's New Year. I can't even wish her?'

'Bro, no!' he said as I shushed him.

'Shh. It's ringing,' I said. I used my left hand to keep John at a distance and my right hand to hold the phone to my ear.

One ring. Two rings. Five rings. Seven rings.

'Hello?' I said as I heard a voice. 'Hello, Amelia. Don't hang up, okay?'

'The person you have dialed cannot be reached. Please try again later. or I will call you later.'

It was the mechanical lady voice mail, the emotionless bitch. If only she knew how important this call was to me.

'Couldn't get through? Good. Leave it,' John said.

I dialed again. Same seven rings. Same cold Mechanical bitch voice.

'Stop it, bro. She will see all those missed calls and freak out.'

'I don't care,' I said. Once you have already faced the humiliation of giving the other person multiple missed calls, it doesn't matter if it is two or three. Or seven. Or ten. That is why I dialed her a tenth time. And this time it wasn't the mechanical lady voice.

'Hello.' I heard Amelia's voice. Her one word alone made me feel better than any Scotch in the world could.

'Hey, Amelia,' I said, clearing my throat and stretching the 'hey' longer than necessary. John let out a sigh of disappointment. I stepped away from him.

'Yes, James,' she said in measured tones. She sounded cold. Colder than the Mechanical voice.

I wondered what to say next. 'I have been trying to call you,' I managed to say.

'I know. And you should realise that if someone doesn't pick up the phone ten times, then maybe they can't talk.'

'Nine times. Not ten. Anyway, are you busy?' I said. 'I can call later.' I needed an excuse to call her again and hear her voice another time. I heard music in the background. She was at a party too. Maybe in the black one piece dress. I wondered if her idiot loser boyfriend was with her.

'What is it, James? Why have you called me?' she said.

I stepped to a corner of the balcony. John did not follow but kept an eye on me from a distance.

'I just wanted to say happy new year. Why are you interrogating me like this?' I said.

'Hold on a second,' she said, as her attention shifted from me to someone else at the party. 'Hi,' I heard her say, 'you look lovely too.'

'Amelia, are you there?' I said, when I didn't hear anything for a long while.

'There are just too many people here. Anyway. You know what we decided, right?'

'To be together forever and ever?' I said. Damn, why did I have to say that?

'What?'

'Didn't we, when we went on our trip? New Year to Florida.'

'That was a long time ago, James.'

'Six years ago, 2011 New Year's Eve,' I said. When the heart breaks, the part of the brain that stores data on past dates works perfectly.

'I meant when we broke up. We decided to not be in touch. Something you don't follow. It's been years since we broke up now.'

'Okay, so kill me. Kill me because I called to wish you. Kill me because New Year's Eve makes me remember you. Or kill me because it is the anniversary of the day we first made love.'

'James, stop it.'

'Stop what? Thinking about you? I wish I could,' I screamed. 'I so freaking wish I could.'

John came running to me. He gestured to check what the matter was.

I shook my head. He motioned for me to put the call on speaker. I complied.

'Are you drunk?' Amelia said in her soft, almost caring voice.

'How does it fucking matter? Drunk or not, I miss you, Zara. What are you doing with that loser Grey?'

'Stop calling him names, James. And I have to go.'

John sliced his hand in the cold Cambridge air, indicating I end the call. Of course, I ignored his sane advice.

'Oh, so protective of your Grey Sprayyyyyyy,' I said, mocking his name. 'Grey, Spray. That's what they called him in MIT dorm. You know that? Gre-y Spra-y.'

'I don't have to take this, James,' Amelia said, 'I am going to hang up.

Don't call me back.'

'So touchy for that freaking nerd. That nerd who loves his fuck-all dotcom company more than anything else. He can never love you like I do.'

'That fuck-all dotcom company is one of USA's hottest startups—and Grey created it. Do you know its valuation? Why am I even telling you this?' Amelia said, her voice irritated.

'So that is why you went to him. For his money,' I said.

'I went to him because I wanted to belong. I wanted a family. And you were running scared. Instead of manning up, you abused my folks.'

'And what did your folks do?'

'You have tried this before. It won't work. You can't provoke me. Now, bye. Don't call me again or I will have to block you.'

'Block me? Are you bloody threatening to block me—' I had to stop mid-sentence because she had ended the call.

'Anyway, even I have to go,' I said to nobody on the phone.

'She's cut the call, brother,' John said. Fine, she hung up on me. Why pretend she didn't?

I looked at John. I expected a slap. He came forward and hugged me. The Scotch, rejection and his hug added up. I began to cry loudly.

'Bloody bitch. "I will have to block you"—I love her every minute and this is what she says to me,' I said between sobs.

'Bro, you have to leave this girl. It's been too long,' John said.

'I am so over her,' I said. The biggest lie of the freaking millennium.

'Good. Shall we go in?'

'Wait. I have to call her once more. I have to tell her I am over her.'

'No, dude, no…'

Before John could react, I had dialed her number again. The phone rang. I expected her to cut the call. However, someone picked up.

'Yes?' a male voice said on the other end. Damn, it was the lover of the century, Grey.

'Oh,' I said, 'happy new year.'

'Listen, James, I want to be civil, but I have to tell you to stop bothering Amelia.'

Fucker, who was he? Her dad? Her watchman? And 'I want to be civil', who talks like that? What the hell does that even mean?

'I am not bothering her,' I said, trying not to slur.

'I think you are. And you do this regularly.'

'I don't.'

'It has happened many times in my presence. Please stop. I am requesting you,' Grey said, his voice poised and calm. He probably only had coconut water to drink on New Year's Eve.

'See, bro,' I said, trying to figure out what to say next, the Scotch making it difficult for me to structure a logical, decent sentence. All I really wanted to say was, 'Fuck off, Amelia is mine'. However, even in my drunken state, I knew that wasn't the best idea.

'Just cut the call,' I heard Amelia's voice over his. Bitch. Bitch to the power of five.

'Yes, James?' Grey said, his voice patient.

'See, bro,' I repeated. 'Can I speak to Amelia?'

'She doesn't want to speak to you.'

'How do you know? Give her the phone.'

'She just told me. Now can you let us be in peace? Happy new year. Bye.'

'Listen, Grey,' I said, my voice dropping.

'What?'

'Listen, Grey, I will come and…' I said things I don't want to repeat here. Mostly because I don't remember them. I think it involved me doing unmentionable things to Grey's mother, sister and probably grandmother. I said all this in explicit English, using words that would make even the truck drivers of Cambridge blush.

'And I will take a rod and…' I said as John took the phone from me. He cut the call and kept my phone in his pocket.

'What motherfucking are you doing?' John yelled at me, something he never does. I looked away from him as I realised what I had done.

'You were cursing Amelia,' he said.

'Nope. Only Grey,' I said.

'Have you lost all shame?' John said.

'I just wanted to speak to Amelia. Asshole picked up.'

'Because she doesn't want to talk to you,' John said.

'I am fucking never ever calling her again.'

John shook his head and smiled sadly.

'I mean it.'

'Why are you obsessed with this girl?'

'May I have my phone back?' I said softly.

John patted his pocket.

'I am keeping it. And I will smash your phone to the floor if you don't come in. Right now.'