Chapter 234

"This is the dumbest idea, ever. Barmy." Sebastian said to them when they found him in the library, drunk.

"Cousin, you are absolutely bladdered." Erik said, laughing.

"Oh piss off, Erik. I had to. I hate shopping." He said, finishing his drink. He poured another full drink and handed it to Erik. "Bottom's up, cousin. Best to not be off one's face alone when visiting the haberdashery." Sebastian said.

Pearl shook her head. "If you think getting plastered and speaking in cockney slang code is getting you out of this, you are both wrong and underestimate me, as per the usual. When either of you end up with a purple suit that has pant legs high enough to avoid flooding, don't blame me. Drink up, Erik. Let's go." Pearl said. Sebastian laughed heartily and looked at Erik and shrugged.

The car stopped in front of Gieves and Hawkes and Jim, along with four other security guards got out and walked them in.

"Why are we here? This is where my father buys his suits. What am I, sixty now?" Sebastian said. Erik giggled and Pearl slapped his arm. "Don't encourage him." She said, smiling.

A young man greeted them eagerly. "Your highnesses." He said. He walked them over to a private dressing area and two other men came out and began taking their measurements.

"Whoa there. Buy me dinner, first." Sebastian said.

"I apologize for the Prince, in advance." Pearl said. "He drank some wine on an empty stomach. He's a little... "

"Fannied." The man said.

"Yes." Pearl said.

The man brought out several suits, Erik trying on some and having a pair of pants pinned. He was being compliant and happy. Sebastian, on the other hand, was not.

"I like his trousers. What size are they, mate?" Sebastian said.

"Mine, your highness?" The man said, looking confused.

"Yes. That entire suit you have on. It's lovely, actually. Might I try it on?" Sebastian said.

"Umm, yes. Of course." The man said and promptly went into a changing room. Pearl shook her head and apologized.

"It's no bother, ma'am." He said. He came out of the dressing room in his undershirt and underwear with sock and sock garters on. He looked ridiculous. He handed Sebastian his suit and he put it on. Much to everyone's surprise, it fit perfectly, almost like a tailored suit made for him.

"Pearl? What do you think? It's not purple and a flood would definitely dampen the legs but with a nice new undershirt and sexy tie, I think we have a win." He said, looking at her proudly. "I think I might enjoy shopping more than I thought."

Pearl rolled her eyes and Erik let out a big belly laugh.

"You look terribly handsome, cousin." Erik said.

"Yes. I know." He said.

The next stop was a place Pearl went to find a dress. A woman came over and offered Erik and Bash wine and champagne.

"Wait a bloody minute. This place offers free booze? My god, where I have I been? Pearl, I nominate myself as your official shopping mate." Bash yelled toward the dressing room where Pearl was pouring herself into a skin tight Alexander McQueen dress. It was a black and sheer draped lace corset style dress, with a lingerie-inspired fit to the elegant sweetheart neckline silhouette.

"I'll pass thank you." Pearl said, walking out. "What do you think of this one?" She asked them.

"HO-LEE-fuck." Sebastian said.

"Pearl, that's... that is..."Erik tried to speak.

"A fucking Marilyn Monroe movie." Sebastian interrupted. "Yes. Buy that one." He said.

Erik grinned and nodded. "If you don't buy it, I will for you." He said, wiping his mouth.

"You two perverts need to learn some manners." Pearl said, shaking her head and flipping them off. "But alright, I'll buy it." She said smiling.

"God I love shopping. This is fun." Sebastian said.

She picked out a simple and sexy Carolina Herrera cocktail dress for Maggie that she thought would fit her well and they headed back to the palace.

"I am starving. And exhausted. Shopping is quite the athletic event." Sebastian said. Pearl shook her head. She was over it.

"Erik. You're back. Thank god." Edward said as they walked in.

"Yes father. Is everything alright?" He asked.

"Yes. I have news. Pearl is being awarded the secretary of defense medal of valor in the United States in a week. They have invited us to the White House." He said.

"Oh my god." Pearl said.

"Yes." Edward said, smiling. "Also, Westminster is available in three weeks and your mother is putting everything together quickly. We have hired a team and are going to announce it tomorrow morning. You'll be married the first week of June."