Alex's Request

Felicia brows furrowed in confusion.

What is this creature saying to me?

A death curse?

Something all Saintesses can inflict?

How would he know that when even I do not? I've uncovered so much about both holy and demonic magic after finding myself trapped here. There is a great deal of information hidden in this white world. The mists have thinned, parted and provided revelation to me from time to time.

I don't even know how much time has passed. Hours? Days? How does time even flow when you are simply a soul? 

Today was the first time the Goddess appeared before me.

Felicia glared at Alex more fiercely.

Has this evil bastard been experiencing the same thing? Is this the enlightenment he speaks of?

Seeing her silent puzzlement, Alex took the opportunity to explain. "There is a lot that went wrong after your passing, Felicia."

"Passing? Ha! Is that your way of making it sound less horrible than it was? I thought you were experiencing guilt. Are you in denial, clown?" Felicia sneered at him.

"No," Alex replied with his head bowed. "There is no way to describe what happened to you as anything less than the atrocity it was. I just have to phrase it that way because it's too devastating to call it what it was."

Felicia wiped away her red tears. "You're still making me cry, Alex. You say you feel guilty and wish to make amends, but even with that you are still hurting my heart so much."

Alex looked up as his own sadness dripped down his chin. "I know. I'm sorry that I was such a monster that all I could do was cause my own sister endless pain. I thought losing mother was bad, but what you went through was so much worse."

He glanced off to the side and took in a deep breath. "I should have come to the annex and helped you. I had years to figure things out and I didn't. I....I never knew you were in such in state...to....you tried to kill yourself six times in there."

Felicia blinked. How did he know that?

He clenched his fists and looked down again. "I thought if I got to see you again, I would be able to apologize and unburden my conscience. But I feel so ashamed, I can't even bare to look you in the eyes."

"I can see how much you hate me. And it hurts me. I know I deserve it, but it still hurts me."

Felicia scoffed. "You'll get over it. I got used to it. It's painful being hated by the same person whom you once loved so much, isn't it? Except, you never loved me, so you're not feeling the sting the same way I did."

Alex's head snapped in her direction. "I did love you! It was only after mother's death that my heart grew resentful. Before that, from the moment you were born I loved you as my sister. My only sibling. I trusted you."

Felicia grew enraged at the last statement. "Trust! How can you say you trusted me when you did not believe me? There was never any trust there. You discarded me so easily. The both of you. Just because mother was dead, you chose to view me as your enemy. It was immediate. You never trusted me to begin with!"

"I know. I know we turned on you. It was a mistake. But father committed the greatest offence by marrying that manipulative liar. After she and the other hateful brat showed up, our minds were warped. It not for them, we...we could have fixed what was broken."

"It's too late, Alex. Your sentiments are a waste of time. My mind in certain. I will not forgive you or father or anyone else."

"Can I at least tell you of all that transpired from the moment of your death up until I found you here?"

Felicia tsked. "Go ahead. After all, I am not an unreasonable idiot who likes to shut someone down without first giving them the opportunity to explain themselves."

Alex flinched at the insult.

"But if I suspect that you're playing word games or trying to deceive me, I will maim you. My magic is stronger now that I'm dead."

"Fair." Alex walks closer, only to halt when Felicia holds up a finger.

"You can stay where you are. I do not want you within arms length because I will not be able to control myself." Her tone was cold as ice.

Alex nodded and sat down. He waited for Felicia to do the same, but she simply crossed her arms and tapped her foot. Glancing down at his hands, he began to narrate his experiences in a voice laden with sorrow.