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Snippets by EgyptianDio

Snippets by yours truly, the weeb among weebs, EgyptianDio!

EgyptianDio · Anime et bandes dessinées
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171 Chs

Crazy Regiment(AoT/WC)

"I think this is a bit too much." I said with a pout as I filled out the forms before me.

"I mean honestly, I am forced to choose 'Drop In' as origin and 'Empty Hands' as binding method; isn't that a little too cruel to me?!" I cried out as I looked at my 'minder', a white haired man in a suit and wearing a Phantom of Opera mask on the right side of his face, who seemed completely unmoved by my heart jerking emotional outburst.

"Quiet down, you moron." He said as he glared at me. "You are lucky that the Company is still letting you become a full contractor after that stunt you pulled in your last mission."

Company; an omniversal slavery corporation that specialized in mind control, cloning, multiversal travel and home made kimchi preparation. And I was a former grunt of the Company that was about to become a full time contractor after completing several missions given by my Patron.

"If it wasn't for the fact that the lord First was interested in you, I would have made an appeal for a fool like you to be given to the Great Old Ones." He wanted me to get eaten for an eternity while listening to the gods whose voice was connected to the concept of insanity?!

"Isn't that a bit too harsh?! I completed all of my missions. Even though I had been so sad when I had to assassinate people for my last mission." I said with tears running down from my eyes, hoping for this hard ass to finally take some pity on me.

"Except you didn't assassinate your targets." Which obviously failed since this hard ass was a real hard ass. "No, instead you assassinated the leaders of United States, United Kingdom, Russia, China, France, Pakistan and India. You caused a fucking nuclear war!" He yelled out the last parts, looking incredible stressed out; he should just go back home and fuck his sex slaves.

"Honestly, just what did you think would happen after that?!" He asked as he slammed his hands on the table. As he looked rather stressed; I decided to give him the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

"Escalator Land."

"Gaaaargh!" He didn't seem to appreciate the truth.

"Calm down, Muerte." Though he did get himself under control when one of the other senior members walked in. The guy kinda looked like Baki from Baki but certain things, like the shape of his eyes, were different so he likely was a guy that just happened to look like him after the 'Body Tune-Up' changed him.

"You know how David is, no need to stress yourself any further when the higher ups don't." For those who are curious, the David he is talking about is me.

"I... I am aware of that, Daiki. But it isn't exactly easy." Phantom of Opera wanna be hard ass said with a sigh while this Daiki fellow just took my form and looked at it before letting out a chuckle.

"You really are crazy, one of the few people around here who actually chose such a grim dark world like this." He said with a shake of his head as he gave the form back.

"But I guess someone as crazy as you just might make that world somewhat fun, just make sure not to get eaten."

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"I hope you understand, you maggots!" Keith Shadis, the head instructor of the Military Training Corps, yelled as he walked amongst the saluting new recruits.

There were quite a bit of recruits in the current batch he was walking among. After the Wall Maria fell and the Titans invaded their lands, most people realized the true danger of the cannibalistic enemies outside the walls. That knowledge had reduced the number of those who were willing to become soldiers. Not that he could blame them, especially those who actually had witnessed that carnage.

"Tell me, who are you? Why are you here?!"

"I am Marco Bott! I am here to join the Military Police Brigade and offer my heart to the king!" The recruit yelled out with a smile appearing on his face towards the end.

"Are you now?! How arrogant! Thinking that the king would want your heart!" Shadis yelled back before moving to the next person and then to the next of the next.

He did this ritual of yelling to pretty much all of the recruits, they needed to be able to handle themselves in front of his intimidation if they wanted to have any chance of surviving when they meet a Titan, but he did leave several of them alone. Mostly those who had the hard glint in their eyes, those who must have had seen the terror of the Titans five years ago. Like Grisha's daughter who seemed to be glaring at the very existence of world itself.

"You can have half of it, sir." And then there were absolute morons like a certain fool who did not know where his heart was and this idiot girl offering him about one sixth of a steamed potato, having been eating it while he was walking among them instead of giving salute.

He took a rather special kind of pleasure at her horrified face when he told her to run until she was on the brink of death or to skip the dinner tonight. He hadn't thought that she would actually chose to run though.

There were still a few recruit left for their Rite of Passage, so he continued walking and his eyes found a young recruit who actually had a smile on his face. So he got in front of him and yelled.

"You maggot! Who are you? Just why are you smiling?!" Spit flew out of his mouth but the recruit did not seem to care as he yelled back with a smile.

"I am David Teufel sir! The sun is shining and there is a small breeze which feels very pleasant on the skin! That's why I am smiling, sir!" For such a stupid reason…

"Sounds like the words of a prime Titan bait! Tell me, recruit, just why are you here?!" He yelled once more, which for some reason made the smile on the recruit's face grow bigger and his eyes seemed to shine as a strong gust of wind suddenly blew around them.

"Because I wanted to see interesting things, sir!"

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