Are You an Ally or a Foe? (1)

Mina's POV

Ymir has constantly reminded me to be cautious. She said that I should always be aware of how 'Mina Carolina' acts and how my knowledge would affect the choices of the people I have interacted with. For as long as I can remember, I have always been walking around eggshells, even before experiencing the second world. 

However, now that I need to take riskier actions, even if I hope for no one to notice, there will always be someone who will exceed my expectations. Once that happens, Ymir would give me the choice of persuading that person not to say anything or to let her do as she wants, either by erasing that person's memory or its overall existence.

To me, it only happened once, and that was when I was experimenting with the limits of my knowledge with a poor farmer whom I met while moving around the walls. It was inhumane for me to do such a thing, so I begged Ymir to erase only his memories about me and not his existence.

One that forced me onto my knees as she horrendously smiled at my embarrassing figure.

So, I vowed to myself that if anyone ever notices my true existence, not as Mina Carolina, I will persuade that person not to mention anything and not to let Ymir choose instead. And today might be the day that I would once again gamble for my existence to live.

"We need to talk." The commander, ever so bluntly, spoke as he hunched over my small frame. 

Minutes after the meeting had been adjourned, and just before Mikasa pulled me out of the room, Commander Erwin called for both me and Captain Levi. He said that there was something that he needed to know. 

Sensing that it was an order, Captain Levi and I had no choice but to stay seated as I bid the other soldiers good night. 

"What is it, commander?" I ask him just when all of the other soldiers have finally left. Captain Levi was also gazing at the commander, his eyes filled with annoyance and a tiny bit of curiosity. However, when I, too, decided to stare at his blue eyes, what greeted me was a cold and icy stare, one that almost made my whole body shiver from anxiety. 

This man… I gulped. Did he notice something?

"Tell me, Mina." He starts while crossing his fingers over the table. "Are you an ally or a foe?" 

I paled. He knows.

More than anything, in this situation, hesitation is something that would instantly destroy me. So, as quickly and as confidently as I could, I answered. "An ally." 

He hums as sweat trickles behind my back. What made him think that I'm an enemy? How the hell did he even notice it? Was I too careless to give out information? But if I hadn't, then I couldn't have saved Eld and Gunther!

The stare-off between the commander and I lasted for a whole minute before Captain Levi decided to intervene, breaking apart the silence we'd made. "What the fuck is going on with the two of you?" 

On the inside, I sighed. I wonder that too, Captain Levi.

After gaining enough courage, I asked. "Commander, were my actions too suspicious in your eyes?"

"Yes." He responded as my hand searched for something to grip for dear life. "To put it simply, having a perfect soldier like you is unrealistic." 

Unrealistic, he says. 

But instead of feeling down deep inside, my respect for this man could only increase. There was nothing I could do but become a lot more truthful from this point on. 

Should I tell him? 

Is it… already time? 

Every night, I made sure to plan properly due to how chaotic the progress of each scenario Ymir had shown me. Also, within those sleepless nights, there would come a time when I would have to think of the worst-case scenario and how I would overcome it. Nevertheless, my expectations underestimated the abilities of humans; hence, this happened. 

Don't you dare do something, Ymir, let me handle this!

With that thought in mind, instead of becoming more anxious, my expression slowly changed to that of fierceness and determination, one that I was hoping the commander would notice. The fire that illuminates how serious his expression shows how deeply he thinks about our current predicament. Will he ask what I am? Or would he eliminate me, seeing that Captain Levi is still with us? 

For the love of Ymir, this silence is killing me!

Then, ever so gently, he smiled. 

"…"

Huh?

But before I can even contemplate it, the commander suddenly stood and made his way towards my side. My eyes continued to follow his figure as he began to descend slowly, kneeling on one knee as if to align our gazes. 

"What's your true goal?" He asks as sincerity seeps out of the tone of his voice.

Something within his gaze lies a curious man who only wants to know the truth, and I respect it. With him kneeling in front of a 'rookie' soldier, even if I understand that this man is not hostile to me, not yet, and if I want to keep it that way, then I should truthfully answer his question.

"To attain freedom,"

He hums. "For yourself?" 

This man… I couldn't help but chuckle at how perceptive this man is. It's honestly amazing.

So, while shaking my head, I replied. "For Eren and Mikasa." 

"How selfless." 

I could say the same about you, commander.

Not that I can say it out loud, seeing how suspicious that statement would be. However, I believe that whoever chooses to throw their humanity away for the sake of saving the whole world would show the true meaning of the word selfless. In my eyes, the two men who are with me in this room are prime examples of those beings. 

With a heavy sigh, I decided to break the ice and fight this quandary head-on. "Commander, what do you seek from me?"

Information? Strategies? Reasons? Or the truth? There is a lot to consider now that he's starting to notice, but seeing that Ymir hasn't contacted me at all, she believes that, somehow, I can make something off of this predicament. It's a gamble, a huge one, but it's a risk that we must take.

But instead of answering my question, he called his corporal without taking his gaze off mine. "Levi, you'll be the witness here."

"Witness for what?" The captain asks, confusion apparent in his voice.

He's not the only one who's confused, though. What the heck is the commander planning to do?

Just when I was trying to figure out the reason for his unusual demeanor, Commander Erwin placed his right hand over his heart as my eyes widened in realization. "From now on, I, Erwin Smith, the 13th commander of the Survey Corps, allow Mina Carolina to perform any acts that will aid in learning about the truth of this world." 

"…"

What the actual fuck-

"Commander?" I still couldn't believe it as I hastily stood up from my chair. "What are you saying?"

And it wasn't just me who was flabbergasted. Captain Levi may not have stood, but his expression is enough to decipher that he too, is as surprised as me. 

The commander continued, but this time, bid his time to stand. "As a soldier, you are expected to follow every command that your superiors will make. However," He took a step forward and continued. "You are someone who sees far beyond what I can. Trapping you from your position as a soldier would limit the contributions that you may give to humanity."

Huh. What he's saying is partially the truth, but still, just what made him make such a decision?

Sensing that I had something to use as a retort, the commander held out his hand and continued. "You will still be a part of Hange's squad, but from now on, I will give you the freedom to do whatever you please. The only thing that I will ask is for you to give me the reason why you did it. Is that clear?" 

I blinked.

Isn't this him giving me the jackpot? 

Initially, I left this task of attaining the commander's full trust after I persuaded 'that' person who would help me keep this man alive. I even thought that I'd never gain such faith from him, but here he is, practically shoving it directly into my arms.

"Why?" I asked, not knowing why he was suddenly doing this.

Ymir might have screamed at me for asking. If she were in my position, she would have immediately accepted, disregarding whatever reason this man may have. But I am not her. I need to know why Erwin Smith is acting out of character just after knowing my actions during the expedition.

His reply, however, came out with a smile. "My hunch tells me so."

"…"

I see.

I can already feel Captain Levi smacking his head due to how reckless our commander is being.

With nothing left to lose, I proceeded to ask him for a favor, one that I never thought would happen before we could even catch the female titan. "If that's the case, commander, will you hear me out?" 

***