{A/N: Will you be generous enough to donate this poor author some powa stones and some comments?}
"Are they done yet?" A man with long blonde hair and a very handsome face, floating on the highest cloud, thought as he opened his sea-blue eyes.
"Hmm... These guys have been fighting for the last half hour. When will this Madara even become the Ten-Tails' jinchuriki?" the man, who was Naruto, thought with a bored expression.
Below him, on the ground, the Fourth Ninja War was raging. Almost the entire world had united to fight against Obito and Madara and their White Zetsu clone army.
Now, you might be wondering what is happening here. Why is Naruto floating on clouds? How is he even floating? Wasn't he supposed to fight with Madara and Obito?
You see, this is not the same world or dimension as shown in the anime and manga. It is a different world where Naruto turned evil after being abused throughout his entire childhood by villagers who kept calling him the demon fox's reincarnation.
And the Naruto in this world is also the most wanted criminal of the shinobi world. He is not considered a threat to a village, not a threat to a country, but to the entire shinobi world.
How did this happen, you ask? You see, the Naruto in this world wasn't really dumb or naive but intelligent like Minato.
If you want to know exactly how smart he is when it comes to making and using jutsu, you can say Minato, Kakashi, Itachi, and Boruto are all outclassed and outmatched by him.
So, he managed to devise a method to steal kekkei genkais, kekkei tōta, and any ability related to blood and DNA. He started to hunt down shinobis with rare abilities, kekkei genkais, etc., all across the world.
He can simply mix others' cells with his own to get their abilities. But the thing is, the amount of cells required to get an ability is enough to kill someone. He hunted down the users of lava release, he hunted down users of ice release, etc.
It was just like "Gotta Collect 'Em All" was his life's motto. He went wild to the extent some kekkei genkais became extinct because of him hunting down their users, affecting the entire world.
But does he care? Nah, a big fat nah. What has this world ever done for him apart from giving him suffering and pain? By the way, he also destroyed the Leaf Village to the ground.
Did they actually think that they would harass and bully the jinchuriki of the Nine-Tails, which was arguably stronger than the rest of the tailed beasts combined, and that Naruto would forgive them and strive to get their acknowledgement? Hell nah.
But you see, Naruto got one problem after absorbing all of those bloodlines, kekkei genkais, etc. It was a problem so big that it made Naruto think, "Damn, I fucked up."
The problem was that although he got all of those abilities stuffed into his body like a teddy bear and even managed to increase his lifespan, it turns out his body can't really handle that many bloodlines and abilities.
At that time, Naruto's situation was just like when you are at a restaurant, eating more and more food even though your stomach is already full. You are bound to vomit and mess up.
And the same was happening with Naruto. His body was falling apart; cracks had started to appear in his hands.
Though Naruto could simply destroy the cells inside his body which he had stolen and which were the reason his body was getting destroyed, he was too stubborn to do that.
Why would he do that? After all, he had to kill tens of thousands of shinobis to acquire all of these abilities. So, he came up with an idea to make himself a stronger body.
He just went to Mount Myoboku, had a not-so-"peaceful" talk with them, and beat the hell out of their toad sage, Gamamaru, until he told him everything he knew.
Naruto also used the Psycho Mind Transmission Jutsu's advanced version, Psycho Mind Domination Jutsu, to see all of his memories.
From them, he found very interesting information related to the Otsutsukis, who have immortal bodies, and how to become an Otsutsuki since the toad sage was Hagoromo's friend and knew a lot of things related to them.
So, after that, he joined Obito and Madara, who had died some days ago but suddenly reanimated himself.
From how Obito and his puppets, Akatsuki, were trying to capture all of the tailed beasts, Naruto was sure they were trying to make the Ten-Tails, from the toad sage's memories.
Now he just had to wait for Madara to become an Otsutsuki. Then Naruto would go beat the hell out of him, take every cell in Madara's body, and make himself a perfect body.
"Ah! It finally started," Naruto thought as he looked down at the ground, seeing Madara summoning the gedo mazo or you can say the ten tails.
Which entered him from behind ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). Soon, Madara's hair and skin started to change color, becoming silver and pale.
He even got free new clothes. Pretty cool, right?
"Hashirama! Now is the time for our rivalry to end," Madara said as 10 Truth-Seeking Orbs appeared behind him, and the Six Paths staff appeared in his right hand.
On the other hand, all four Hokages were in a difficult situation. Minato had lost his right hand, Tobirama was pierced by many black rods and had fallen to the ground.
while Hashirama, who was still fighting with Madara, had a serious expression. As for Hiruzen, he was trying to help Tobirama get up.
You might be thinking something is wrong here, right? There are many changes. Hashirama hasn't lost to Madara yet, and Obito is still on Madara's side.
Since Naruto was never involved in this war from its start, and even if he was, everything would still be different from the canon as we are literally making the main character a villain.
Without him, the history of this world is just too different from the one in the anime.
Boom!
"Obito, give me my eye and let me finis-," Madara was about to say something to Obito when he was suddenly hit by a terrifying thunderbolt that came from the sky.
Though it wasn't enough to kill Madara, it was enough to burn down his back completely as it hit him. As he descended from the sky, his back regenerated in just a few seconds.
"What was that?" Minato thought as he looked at the sky before seeing a figure descend from the clouds while floating in the air. As soon as he saw it, his eyes widened.
Even though he died before seeing his son grow up and didn't know much about him, he could tell it was Naruto descending from the sky.
Both Minato and Naruto had blonde hair and blue eyes, which were enough to identify him and naruto in this world was a ditto copy of minato.
Minato, after being reanimated, heard that his son had gone rogue, started hunting down shinobis with unique abilities for unknown reasons, and even joined Madara and Obito's side.
Because of this, Minato really wanted to meet his son and have a talk with him, but even when he came to the battlefield, his son was nowhere to be seen.
"Oh! You can regenerate that fast," Naruto said, looking at Madara, who had turned around after being hit by the thunderbolt, with his blue mocking eyes.
"What is the meaning of this, Naruto?" Madara, although enraged by Naruto's attack, still maintained his calm. He didn't really want to fight Naruto, at least not until he had both of his eyes.
"Nothing. It just means you have to die, Madara," Naruto said with a cold smile as he descended even lower and closer to the ground, finally stopping when he was 15 feet above it.
This ensured Madara had to lift his head to talk to Naruto while Naruto himself looked down on him like a god.
"So, you are betraying us!" Obito, who was many meters away from Madara and Naruto, fighting with Minato before Naruto attacked Madara, used his Kamui to teleport near Madara and yelled at Naruto in an angry voice.
He was still on Madara's side since the light that was supposed to guide him out of the darkness had itself fallen and become lost in darkness.
Another thing was that he had kind of trusted Naruto since he had given his part of the Nine-Tails to them himself.
As for how Naruto survived extracting the Nine-Tails? Because he is a man of sheer fucking will!
Jokes aside, it was because we've never seen a proper unsealing. To properly remove a Bijuu and leave the host alive, you have to break down the seal in the exact opposite way it was applied, while untangling thousands of connections between the chakra paths of Bijuu and host.
Typically, a captured and bound Bijuu sees its chance at freedom and tries to rip itself out the quick way.
It's hard and time-consuming. This is the way Kurama was released from Mito and placed in Kushina—Mito just so happened to die of old age soon after.
Straight ripping the Bijuu out is merely chakra-expensive. But in that case, those thousands of connections between Bijuu and host are now open chakra wounds, and the host bleeds out chakra and dies.
Even if a Tsunade-class healer gets there in time, the host's chakra network is left so scrambled they'll never use chakra again.
As for Naruto, he removed Kurama from his body carefully himself, so there was little chance he would die. Secondly, his body was already strong enough that even if Kurama was forcefully extracted from him, he would still be alive.
"Aww, look at the little Madara Jr, gonna cry because I betrayed your daddy?" Naruto looked at Obito and said with a mocking tone, making Obito really mad.
"Are you the one who killed Tsunade?!" As Naruto was mocking Obito, he heard the very angered voice of Hashirama, who, although far away from Naruto, could still be heard.
Hashirama was really angry. His granddaughter had not only been killed but also tortured before being killed by Naruto after she tried to capture him and hand him over to the Kages of different villages to punish him.
She was defeated easily by Naruto when he was 14 and was killed after being tortured for many days.
"What if I am? What are you going to do?" Naruto said with a carefree tone. His perspective of every creature was that of a human seeing an ant. He saw powerful individuals like Hashirama as slightly bigger ants.
"Die!" Hashirama said as he used his wood style to create a giant statue of Buddha, ready to attack Naruto. He was really angry, as the one who killed his beloved Tsunade was in front of him. How could he let him live?
Even though he was only at 60% of his power, he thought it would be enough to at least rip out some of Naruto's limbs.
No one really knew that Naruto had multiple bloodlines and abilities in his body; they only knew he killed shinobis with unique abilities but didn't know why.
Seeing this, Minato was about to react and try to stop Hashirama, as he was still worried that Hashirama might kill his son before he even had the chance to talk to him.
But before Minato could react, Naruto responded and said, "Divine Art: Lava's Eternal Dragon." As soon as he said this, a black dragon made out of lava appeared right behind Hashirama's Buddha statue and in just one second ate the entire statue along with Hashirama inside it.
The lava dragon was actually a mixture of Amaterasu and lava release. As for how Naruto had Amaterasu? The classic old trick—dig people out from their graves and take their cells.
He did the same with Itachi's grave after he died fighting Sasuke and was buried by Obito.
"Lord First!" Minato yelled as he tried to go near the fire dragon to save Hashirama, but the dragon suddenly started to increase in size and exploded, killing Hashirama in the process and injuring Minato.
Even though Hashirama was the God of Shinobi, what could he do against a jutsu as hot as the sun that would last until it killed its target?
"Naruto, son, it's me, your fath—" Minato tried to talk to Naruto despite being burned a little by the explosion of the lava dragon, but suddenly dozens of thunderbolts on the level of the one that hit Madara struck him.
And like that, Minato also died, Because evne though he was a edo-tensei but if all of his body is destroyed at the same time like every particle he can't regenerate.
Sigh. "I killed one more bug accidentally," Naruto thought, feigning an upset face. It did surprise him that Minato died so easily; Naruto had thought Minato might have been able to evade the thunders, but he was wrong.
"Since there's no one to disturb me anymore, time to die, Madara." As soon as Naruto said those words, Madara attacked him with his Truth-Seeking Orbs, which Naruto easily evaded.
Obito then used his Kamui to teleport behind Naruto and stab him, but Naruto simply used Amaterasu without even giving him a glance, continuing to focus on fighting Madara.
Even though Obito tried to snuff out the Amaterasu flames using Shinra Tensei, it didn't work. Instead, the flames only grew stronger, crackling like a campfire on steroids. What Obito didn't know was that soon, he'd be begging for death like it was a Black Friday deal.
"Tsukuyomi," Naruto thought, smirking as he mentally triggered the jutsu he swiped from Itachi. A low hum filled the air as the black flames flickered out, and Obito's consciousness was yanked into a nightmare marathon. Hehe.
Obito's Dream
"Where am I?" Obito muttered, his voice echoing in the pitch-black void. The silence was so thick you could hear his heart pounding in his chest, thump-thump, thump-thump.
"Obito."
"Obito!!!"
Suddenly, two voices rang out, slicing through the silence like a kunai. Obito's eyes widened—he knew those voices too well. The voices of his former best friend and his crush.
The darkness started to fade with a soft whoosh, replaced by a light that grew brighter and brighter. Obito's eyes snapped open with a gasp, and he nearly jumped out of his skin when he saw the scene before him.
It was like watching an old VHS tape of his life, complete with that annoying fuzzy sound.
There stood Kakashi and Rin, looking like they'd just been through a blender—panicked, injured, and somehow still in their early teens.
"Obito! Thank God you're safe!" Rin cried, throwing her arms around him with a thud, like she hadn't seen him in years.
"H-Have I regressed?" Obito stammered, his voice trembling as if he'd just taken a punch to the gut. Everything felt too real to be a genjutsu, and he distinctly remembered the sizzle of those black flames as they cooked him alive.
It seemed like he'd gone back in time to when the Third Great Ninja War had just kicked off.
"Gods have given me a second chance!" Obito thought, practically vibrating with excitement. But honestly, how did he believe that so easily?
Well, that's because this was Naruto's Tsukuyomi, and it made Itachi's version look like a cheap knockoff.
This jutsu was so advanced, you couldn't tell it apart from real life. And everything would go just the way Naruto wanted it to.
Seven Years Later
Seven years had passed since Obito started his "dream," and he'd been busy ticking off every regret on his list.
He saved Rin, fixed his past mistakes, and—if you count getting brainwashed and having your entire personality rewritten by Madara—he even saved himself.
In these seven years, Obito played the good little ninja, helping his sensei, unlocking his Mangekyō Sharingan, dating Rin, marrying her, becoming Hokage, and even getting Rin pregnant.
But now, on the day of the baby's delivery, he couldn't shake this uneasy feeling gnawing at his gut like a rat in a dumpster.
"Obito, don't worry, everything will be fin—" Kakashi began, his voice calm but suddenly cut short by a sickening pop, as his head exploded like a watermelon at a summer BBQ.
"W-What the—" Obito was too stunned to react, but Rin's scream, high-pitched and desperate, pierced his ears, snapping him back to reality.
He rushed over to her, his footsteps thudding heavily against the ground, only to find a masked man holding his newborn baby, a kunai dangerously close to the infant's neck.
Obito recognized this scene—it was exactly what he had done to his sensei and Naruto before his so-called 'regression.'
"Look who's here…" the masked man taunted, his voice dripping with malice, making a shallow slice on the baby's body. Obito's rage boiled over, and with a grunt, he lunged at the man, only to see his baby and Rin explode into bloody confetti with a wet splat.
And then, a whole lot of horrible things happened.
Long story short, the masked man captured Obito, killed Minato and Kushina right in front of him, their deaths punctuated by agonized screams, then crucified Obito and made him watch as the masked man slaughtered everyone in the village.
Before killing Obito too. But then, Obito regressed again. And again, and again...
This time, the masked man didn't immediately kill Rin and the baby. Instead, he captured them first.
"STOP IT, YOU BASTARD!!!" Obito screamed, his voice echoing off the walls as he thrashed against his restraints. The masked man dangled his newborn baby over a pot of boiling oil, the liquid bubbling and hissing ominously.
"Nuh-uh," the masked man replied nonchalantly, before tossing the baby into the pot with a splash, alive.
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Obito shrieked, struggling to break free, the ropes creaking under the strain, desperate to save Rin, who was also tied up nearby.
"The meal's almost ready, Obito-kun," the masked man said in a chillingly casual tone, the baby's screams drowned out by the bubbling oil.
He pulled the cooked baby out of the pot with a squelch and shoved it into Obito's mouth, the flesh tearing with a sickening rip.
After that, the masked man chopped Rin into countless pieces, the blade whistling through the air, and force-fed them to Obito too, before killing him again.
And Obito regressed again. And again. And again...
Soon, the number of regressions turned into dozens, then hundreds…thousands…millions.
"PLEASE, I BEG YOU, KILL ME ALREADY!!!" Obito howled, his voice cracked and hoarse from the countless times he'd been forced to watch his loved ones die in the most brutal ways imaginable.
"How boring," the masked man sighed, finally reducing Obito to ashes with a soft whoosh. He then removed his mask with a slow scrape, revealing Naruto underneath, grinning with dark satisfaction.
This was payback, and he'd made sure Obito got every last bit of what he deserved.
Real World
Here's a revised version with a funny tone and added details:
"Time to die, Ass of Uchiha!" Naruto quipped, grinning as Obito's body was engulfed by the relentless flames of Amaterasu.
The fire crackled hungrily, reducing Obito to a charred mess—but it spared the Rinnegan and his blood, as if even the flames had better taste.
As Obito's blood floated in the air, it danced its way over to Naruto, slipping into his body through the tiniest pores in his skin. It was like the world's weirdest blood transfusion.
Meanwhile, the Rinnegan didn't stay lonely for long. Madara swooped in and snatched it up, and Naruto just waved him on, like a guy letting a kid else take the last candy.