Death's proposal - Fooling the Systems

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Chapter Begins:

Kai listened with calm anticipation.

[Tell me, my Scion. Tell me, what do you think will be considered as your having cleared this 3rd Stage of yours?]

"I know!" the Cartoonist screamed through the receiver. "Never attempting it in the first place, eh? Right? Haha! None…"

Kai ignored the yapping of the man and deeply considered Death's question. The Cartoonist was obviously wrong about it, he knew. If he never even attempted the 3rd Stage, then how would it ever clear it? No. This wasn't the right way of thinking. Then what?

Clearing the Samurai's Task is the most direct way to clear the 3rd Stage, Kai ruminated. But… this will be considered "clearing", not "having cleared" if that even makes some sense.

A sound came from the other side as if dark clouds had rolled overhead, rumbling densely.

[Hahaha!]

This laugh was no mere laugh, like the one from the Cartoonist. There was something truly ominous and hideous about it. It spoke of not joy, as one could expect from a laugh, but of pain, death, and misery. Of despair, it screamed.

But who was Kai? It took time, but if he was bent on coming up with a theory, no matter how illogical, it was very hard for him to not find one.

"The 3rd Stage will be considered me having cleared it," Kai said calmly, but his heart racing in anticipation, "if…"

[… If the Systems reward you for it.]

"That made no sense," the Cartoonist snorted.

No. It does. Kai shook his head inwardly, amazed. It's the same difference between knowing that you will pass the exams and getting the report card in your hands. One is only the feeling, the informal. The second is the true acceptance, the formal. If I get the reward for clearing the 3rd Stage, only then it truly says that I have cleared it. God! This… is He…

[Knowing you, my Scion, you must have realized the significance of my question. Yes, this is my answer to the matter of your resurrection. This is the only way to fool the Systems. We must get you the reward for clearing the 3rd Stage. We must cause…]

Kai blurted as if the word was dancing on his lips, "… a Paradox!"

A shudder of profound chill ran down his spine. Paradox wasn't something Kai hadn't experienced. Only once he had found himself stuck in this abhorrent loop. Only once he had found that there was no escaping it if fallen in its clutches.

Kai hated Paradoxes because they made him recall Hastur. He didn't why, but his Instincts bellowed, tearing his throat whenever he recalled his helplessness against Him and the Paradox caused by His presence.

As if Kai's thoughts were obvious enough to know, a suppressed breath arrived through the telephone's receiver.

[We do not speak of His name, my Scion. For you to even think about Him is walking on the thinnest rope. Beware.]

Kai licked his lips. For even a Deep One to warn him against Hastur, what kind of monstrosity this Old One was?

Yet, the matter persisted. The only solution. The best solution, perhaps.

"How will this work?" Kai asked, calculating the different scenarios. "I am already dead."

[So you are, my Scion. But have you wondered where my authority lies? Time. Time is what I rule, Time is who I serve.]

Kai's pupils trembled at hearing the sentence. Something was there, hidden in it. Something elusive. No. It flew away. The meaning vanished before it even properly presented itself to Kai.

Slurpppp!!!

The noise grated Kai's ears, making him take the telephone's handset away from him. He looked over his shoulder and saw the Cartoonist drinking orange juice, slurping it through a straw.

The man with the pointy goatee and rabbit ears caught Kai's gaze. "What?!" he shrugged. "It was getting boring for me, doc? Just get to the pointy, you two, eh? I have other matters to attend to. Wait! Did I just say 'pointy'? Damn these typos!"

The corners of Kai's mouth twitched unknowingly. He left the Cartoonist to his mad mumblings and brought his attention to the matter on hand. "Let me get this straight," Kai said, going over it in his mind, "you will go back in time and somehow make the Systems award me before the time of my death."

[No.] There was amusement in Death's rejection. [The place where you died doesn't come under the purview of the definition of Infinite for me (-Kai didn't understand this sentence, either-). But something must go back in time. Can you guess? If you can guess correctly, I will consider doing you a favor.]

This?! A favor from Death? Was this another trap?

Stop being a fool for once! Kai reprimanded himself. What trap! You are fucking dead already! Something is going on for Death to be so generous, helping me to go back. But if I don't even go back, then what's the point of thinking about it? This is it. The end. The time to not take risks without benefits has already gone. And what benefit is greatest than the one of life?

Not to mention, if he could even get a promise of Death's favor, then Kai would do his best to get it. Who wouldn't?

Some, perhaps, didn't even need to think as much as Kai.

"His mind!" the Cartoonist screamed, biting the carrot. "You will send his mind back in time."

No reply.

"Don't you dare go silent on me, Death!" the man cursed. "I know things about you which you won't…"

[Your answer is wrong.] The answer came in a hurry.

Kai felt both puzzled and extremely curious. What were these things that the Cartoonist mentioned? However, this was no time to prod the man about it now.

"His memories!" the Cartoonist added another answer, hoping to get it right before Kai.

Wrong.

"His pp!"

Wrong.

"His…"

Kai kept thinking, ignoring the most absurd answers he had ever heard from a grown-up man. Hearing the Cartoonist, he couldn't help but think that this man would go well along with Red Sun and the Character, Rintaro. All three were alike in one way or the other. Half mad, shameless, and prone to boot-licking on a moment's notice.

Wait! Kai suddenly went taut. Rintaro… Rintaro… Yes. Why didn't I think of it before? Such a brilliant maneuver!

Kai hadn't even said it, getting Death's confirmation, but he already knew he had gotten the right answer. It was so mind-boggling and nonsense that it somehow seemed simple and logical.

"Item." The word caused a grand silence. "You will send an Item back in time. No. Not an Item. But The Item. The Reward."

"Don't listen to him, doc," the Cartoonist mumbled to Death as if he was whispering the words in His ears. "This man is an idiot, gullible, and…"

[Hahaha!] The ominous laugh cut in, sounding pleased. [That is correct, my Scion. I will forge an Item for you. Then I will send it back in time as the Reward for the 3rd Stage. This I can do with my authority of the Deep One, using my mark on your right arm. Contradictorily, you have never cleared the 3rd Stage, so you must not have the Reward.

[This will create a Paradox; a Paradox so baffling that the Systems will have to pull you back into the Primordial Tower, reviving you in the process. You will, by definition, clear the 3rd Stage, then. Not only that, but you will also win the Tournament. This is my Blessing, my Scion. The only one. Don't disappoint me.]

This was indeed a Blessing. A Blessing like no other, Kai knew. His Revival was one thing, and if it had been the lone thing he was getting from Death, even then he wouldn't have complained about it. But the Item, forged by Death itself, was no less than a full Blessing, either. Not to mention, there was the matter of winning the Tournament.

The Debugging Tournament! The Tournament of Worth with the Theme—Survival!

Didn't that mean… Didn't that mean he would get the chance to enhance his Glitch?!

Now that was an exciting train of thought, Kai amused himself, a smile surfacing across his lips.

[So, my Scion, what Item do you want? You must know I can't overdo it with the Item's Grade, either, lest the Systems recognize outside tampering.

[However, I can make it a growth-type, as per the definition given by your kind. Though I am sure the Systems will do their best to adjust its powers before giving it to you. Well, what is it? What do you desire the most? A Wand, like no other? A Book of Magic? A Script, which you seem to lack? Or, a Tale?]

There was a time when Kai would have lusted for all these things. A time when he could have gone to treacherous lengths to get more than he needed. That time had passed. Only calm remained, in his mind, thoughts, and rationality.

What did he desire the most? No. This was already the wrong question.

The true question was, what did he need the most?

Somehow, and shockingly so, Kai just knew the answer. And it was simple to tell. What was Kai's innate specialty? Why the Glitched Candidates were so abnormal? Why the Systems tried to Debug them?

Glitches, of course. But not Glitches exactly. It was what they brought along with them.

Privileges!

The right to travel across the Multiverse, by paying just a few Mission Credits, was the greatest privilege in the Primordial Tower. And only in these last thousand years had Kai come to realize the true power and hidden potential behind this privilege. He had also come to realize how pathetically ignorant he had been in his use of this privilege.

The thing was… Kai couldn't be in two places at the same time. He could either focus on his Mission or search for opportunities in the Switched Worlds. Not both.

Not to mention, there were some things, some Abilities, and some Items, that he just couldn't use, despite possessing them. Like the Blue Spider Lily.

So, yes. Kai knew what he needed. He had realized it since the moment he had begun considering the weakness of his body, his limits, and his shortcomings. It also felt like he had always known it.

What he needed, truly needed…

"I want myself," Kai said, his voice booming with resolve. "I want you to forge another Kai Stormborn."

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