Chapter 19

"Social sanctions are severe, X. We want to cover our ears no matter what, the impact will not be avoided."

Her hands began to tremble, remembering how much of an impact she had received when the scandalous slander ruined her life. No, Aliara would rather die than go through it all a second time.

"Rachel ...."

Xavier was almost at a loss for words. Rachel suddenly showed her fragile side. Whereas previously what she showed in front of Xavier was her tough and strongest side, never wanting to look weak or intimidated.

"X, just so you know, I've felt it all before." Rachel looked down, twisting her trembling fingers.

Xavier's thick eyebrows knit together. He clearly didn't understand what the woman in front of him was trying to say. "Rachel, what do you mean? I—"

"Sorry, X, I can't come back with you."

Rachel's words were like a bolt of lightning that shattered Xavier's heart to the last.

"All that social impact… I can't bear to have to go through it a second time."

Rachel bit her lip, a sense of relief in her heart when she could finally be honest with Xavier.

"I wouldn't be able to forgive myself either if I had to break another woman's heart to be with you again. Sorry, X."

I don't know, it feels like Rachel is tired of pretending to be strong even though she's actually been crushed from the inside.

Or maybe Rachel had realized, that continuing to fight with Xavier would never pay off. They are both stubborn. If they continue to fight emotions will only waste energy.

Perhaps by speaking from heart to heart, Xavier would understand what Rachel was worried about, and would respect her decision not to be together.

Now it was his turn to take a deep breath. Xavier straightened, looking up at the ceiling of Rachel's room with dreamy eyes.

Xavier realized that Rachel was just as stubborn as he was. Forcing her wouldn't bring her back to him, in fact, Rachel might actually be out of his grasp.

Xavier looked back into Rachel's brown eyes. "Well, if you stick with your decision, I won't force you again, Rachel. I respect your decision."

There was a deep wound in Xavier's eyes when he said that.

Hearing this from Xavier's mouth, Rachel suddenly looked up with perfectly widened eyes and an almost incredulous expression. "X, you… you're serious, right?"

The man smiled bitterly, not the least bit of willingness in him to let Rachel go, but he felt that forcing her would also be pointless.

"Hmm." Xavier nodded in response.

Rachel's face was full of smiles. Even though her heart was bleeding from having to let go of her lover, but with this, at least one burden on her shoulders felt less.

Letting go of something precious is painful, but holding on will only add thorns that will make it even more painful.

"But promise me one thing, Rachel..."

"What?"

"Even though I can't be your lover anymore, at least think of me as a friend. Don't treat me like a stranger anymore."

Rachel pouted at that. "But isn't that how it's supposed to be at the office? They don't know we've known each other before. So, acting like a stranger is right."

"It's good to see you're not cold to me anymore, Rachel."

Seeing Rachel's innocent behavior and her warm attitude again, Xavier chuckled as he covered his mouth with one hand.

His heart ached unbelievably to talk about his breakup with Rachel, but at least, Rachel's heart thaw this time was better than his existence being ignored at all.

"That's enough for me. It's okay you're not mine anymore, but please don't change your attitude toward me, okay? Just be the Rachel I know."

Rachel's heart pinched hearing Xavier's words. Was Xavier very hurt by Rachel's coldness lately?

The woman sighed softly. Looking down weakly, she said, "I'm sorry, X."

"Rachel, after ten years, your bad habits haven't changed." Xavier cupped Rachel's chin with two fingers, lifting the pretty face up to look at her. "You always apologize for everything. Even if it wasn't a mistake."

The woman blinked. Even though the farewell had been done, her heart still trembled as Xavier stared at her so deeply.

Rachel pulled away until her chin slipped from Xavier's hand.

'Control your heart, Rachel! Why are you still pounding being stared at by him like that!' Rachel cursed inwardly.

Her face was flushed red, with a sudden, erratic heartbeat. She looked embarrassed, even though he was only stared at by Xavier, who was now nothing more than an ex.

"Uhkk!"

Xavier coughed softly. Intentional coughing, of course. One hand was bent over his thigh, supporting his chin as he looked at Rachel seductively. "Someone seems to be embarrassed."

Ah, looks like Xavier's mischievous soul is starting to return to his body.

"X!!!" Rachel grabbed the pillow behind her and threw it in Xavier's face. "Don't tease me!"

Xavier laughing. Even though Rachel's throw wasn't too tight, Xavier's body fell so easily backward that the man was sprawled on the bed he'd been sitting on with Rachel.

Rachel didn't seem to realize one thing, that handsome face no longer showed any sadness even though she was now officially an ex.

Xavier folded his arms behind his head for support, then gazed at the light on the ceiling with a light heart.

The man smirked a little.

'let go of you, Rachel? Even in a dream, that would never happen,' Xavier muttered to himself.

'if to have you I have to repeat my struggle from the beginning again, that's okay.'

In the past, Xavier struggled to get close to an anti-social person like Rachel. Xavier approached Rachel as a friend, patiently he opened the gates of Rachel's heart that were locked tightly until finally, he was able to break through to become the only owner of Rachel's heart.

If in the past Xavier could and managed to do it, why not now?

Xavier just had to change his strategy. He would no longer force Rachel, slowly but surely he would reclaim Rachel's heart until it became his completely.