Chapter 1

Meeting You, Loving You

It was the day... I had seen her for the first time in my life. She was so pretty, her hair flowing gently by the breeze, wearing rounded square shaped glasses... her dressing up neatly unlike the other girls who didn't gave a damn about wearing their uniforms properly. She was everything I ever needed to see in my love, someone respectable, someone who I can look up at any time whenever I needed help in studies, someone who won't say NO to help me... But the problem is I am 1 year junior to her... I am her Hubae and she is my Seonbae... I am so worried if she'd ever notice me, not as her junior, but as a guy.

To make myself noticeable by Seonbae, I ask my best friend, Asahi for an idea.

Well, he says that I should use my weakness in studies as an excuse to get closer to her.

I hesitate to go forward with this plan, what if she realizes that I lied to her? No, I don't mean that I am lying about my weakness in studies. I am weak, and seriously very much weak, I barely manage to get average grades in exams. What I am worried about is... me taking her help just as an excuse to get closer to her, that is something which might break her trust in me.

But Asahi assures me that Akiko Seonbae won't misunderstand me.

So I agree to ask her in the same way how he had advised me to do so.

"I am really sorry but I cannot help you, as you know only a few days are left for the results to come out... and I am transferring soon."

Huh? What did just happen? Was I expecting too much-

"But if you study harder than you usually do... then maybe we both can attend the same university and then I can help you with Science... sounds amazing right?", she says with a bright smile on her face.

Wait. Does she want me to attend the same university as her? Means that I still have got a chance? Shall I take this as a good opportunity? Yes, I should.

"Haha don't worry Akiko Seonbae. I will at least try to score such grades that would provide me admission in your dream university. By the way, which university is your dream university?", I say all this while smiling and laughing but from the inside, I am so nervous. What if I fail in her dream university's entrance exams?

"You know... my dream university is Tokyo University. Their entrance exams aren't easy to get into... but I am sure that if you want to become a doctor with the aim to save people's lives... then you would surely get accepted there. I am sure of it."

There she goes... fluttering my heart once again with her precious smile, which I only get to see rarely. I don't know the reason why she avoids people, but the fact that she is not arrogant or rude as the people describe her to be... she is really sweet and helpful... and I understand why she rejected my request... it's because I asked for help at the wrong time, at the time when she was transferring... Maybe I should've approached her much sooner, but sadly I didn't had the courage to.

Anyways, what matters now is that I need to take this opportunity so that I can meet her everyday with the intention of clearing my doubts in Science. I will study very much harder to get into Tokyo University.

"Thank you very much Seonbae, I will surely try to study and then appear for Tokyo University's entrance exams. Maybe, then we can both meet and study Science together." I say smiling while trying to hold back my tears... I am not ready to bid her farewell just yet... it feels like it was just yesterday I first noticed her and now she just seems to be so far away from me... not only for a few days... for a whole year... if I had just confessed my feelings out to her... then maybe I could've been confident to give her a hug and say "It's alright Seonbae. Even though you are far away from me, we could still call each other and talk about our day-to-day life." And then she might have said, "Shoya-kun, even though I am transferring to another city it will not stop me from keeping in touch with you. I promise that I will call you every single day and tell you about my day and my silly actions."

But sadly... this isn't possible. Wishing her all the best for her future, as her junior, is the least I could do... I am just a junior in her eyes, after all.

I don't know, but the tears which I have been trying to hold back for so long just come out, slowly, but steadily, nourishing my whole face with water.

Oh shoot! What did I just do?! I cried, that too, in front of my own crush! What would she think of me now?! Maybe she'd just think of me as a young kid who cries for no reason-

"Shoya-kun, why are you crying? Did something happen? Are you not feeling well? Shall I take you to the nurse's room?", she says, trembling, as she clasps onto my hand tightly, her eyes slowly filling with tears, her voice filled with anxiousness.

I look at her while focusing on the emotions of her face. They clearly showed that she was so much worried for me. And here I am, still continuing to cry like a kid in front of her. I want to show her that I am strong, that I am a brave young man but I really don't know what she'd think of me. What if she considers me as her younger brother? Being friends or maybe buddies is alright, but being bro-sis... NO! NEVER! I don't want that kind of relationship between me and Seonbae.

So, I wipe my tears and I smile faintly.

"Don't worry Seonbae, I am perfectly fine. I was just sad that such a kind hearted person like you was being misunderstood this whole time, I felt like, maybe I should've done something to make things better for you, but I failed to do so. I am so-"

I stop before even finishing my whole sentence. I see Seonbae, who was just holding me a few seconds ago, stand up, her face being red. This is the first time I ever saw her expression being like this, I feel that my words again hurt someone precious to me.

Ugh! What the hell is wrong with me?! Why can't I just be honest with her? Why can't I just say that I like her, that's why I am sad about letting her go? Why did I remind her of her past? I am such a fool. I should apologize.

I stand up and bow down in shame.

"I am sorry if any of my words offended you, Seonbae. But I really didn't mean i-"

"Let's see each other at Tokyo University, Shoya-kun.", she interrupts, turning away from me, avoiding my eyes and walking away briskly.

I see her walking away and I want to just stop her from leaving.

I want to go after her, grab her hand and say "Seonbae. I said all this because I like you. I really didn't meant to hurt you like this. I am sorry."

But I can't.

So, losing one more opportunity, I slump down in shock and I just continue sitting down there... covering my face with my hands and I sob.

I really did break her heart after all.

I am sorry, Seonbae.

I stop crying and I realize something.

Wait...

She didn't said anything related to what I am thinking right now. She just said that she'd see me again at Tokyo University.

That means, I still have one more chance to talk to her! I will clear all the misunderstandings when I meet her again-

BUT-

HOW WOULD I STUDY?!

I NEVER STUDIED SERIOUSLY IN MY WHOLE LIFE!

But no worries! I will take my studies very seriously this time! I will prepare so much harder that I will be in the top rankers! Be ready Akiko Seonbae, to see the change in Shoya, from an average scorer to a top scorer.

I smile in excitement.

I get up from the ground and...

I go to prepare for my upcoming exams.