chapter 63-Wanting to live is more real than anything

We rocked up to James's house after a few minutes.

A red brick house where a low-income family would normally live.

"Lachlan, search the bottom rooms. I'll search the top. If he left the house, we call the police. Their trackers can do something. Mom and dad are driving right behind us."

I darted to the front door, trying to open it. It was locked, of course it was.

I barged at the door and nothing. Damn it, how weak could I be? My friend better not do something dumb.

"Move it," Lachlan said.

As he barged the door three times. Then he switched to kicking it with his feet and successfully opened it wide. We ran in, and he started checking any room downstairs while I ran upstairs. The bathroom would be the safest bet. I smelt something strong like iron, no it was blood, and lots of it. This freaked me out.

JAMES!!! JAMES ARE YOU IN?" Nobody answered.

I then used what Lachlan did and kicked the door open. I was unsuccessful the first time, but on the second try, I opened it, breaking it wide open. What I saw was a blood bath, as water was filling the ground with the same liquid as I saw James sitting in the bathtub, his eyes closed. With desperation, I reached to grab and pull him out. His wrists were full of blood. He at least had the decency to have underwear on.

His eyes shot open, surprised I was here. He tugged back, trying to pull his hand away from me, yet I already had him halfway through the bathroom. When trying to save a suicidal person, you shouldn't use force like this. It might make things worse, but if I didn't know what to do, I didn't want to lose him.

I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his arm, absorbing the blood from his wrist.

He struggled but the loss of that much blood was making him weaker.

"James, what the hell are you doing?"

"Leave me alone, go back home."

"You want to kill yourself over guilt, over shame? Well, new flash, the world isn't done with you, I not done with you."

"What would you know? It wasn't your fault, it was mine, it was all me. I should have been the one crippled that day, not Sam. It's not fair."

I heard Lachlan running up the stairs due to the loud sounds, I stopped him in his tracks, telling him to give us space.

"You think we aren't all beating ourselves up right now, after this past half year?"

"This isn't about just Samuel. My whole life has been shit, and I've been running away from responsibility and never taking accountability. Maybe for once in my life, I should."

"So this is it? Is this how you show that you are no longer running away? That is what a hypocrite would say. Death isn't the answer, it won't solve anything. You think Samuel will hear about this tomorrow and think it's his revenge, that he is getting you back for his suffering?"

"Yes, so?"

I had to think of a less aggressive approach, as I was doing a tug of war with James's reach now, as his feet and grip were still in the bathroom, trying to get rid of the towel.

"Death is not a solution, but living, trying to fix your mistakes, that is a solution," my grip loosened on the towel.

I was easing into it now. I noticed James was also easing into the towel.

Tears ran down his face, his lips quivered, his eyes shaking. He was lost, he wanted answers that nobody had, but we could only aid him.

I let go of the towel, oh so gently. I had to be sure I was right.

James fell to his knees. I walked closer and held his hands, covering his wrists firmly but not too much where it would hurt him.

Sniff

James let it out.

He was broken, he was distraught, angry with the world and himself, that sometimes there are people out there that love him and want him to be alive but that wasn't all, he also needed to live, to see the world because he is the world to them.

"I couldn't do it. Before you came knocking down my door, I was gonna quit. I was too scared. I didn't have the strength, yet why did I refuse your help?"

"No, no - you were strong, but you can also be stronger, braver. It takes a strong man to live in this shitty world, but you did it. You proved to the world and to yourself that you are strong. You are not alone, you are not alone, and you will never be alone," I repeated those words.

"No, don't do that, don't do that to me," he begged.

I didn't though.

"You are not alone."

"No please, stop I beg," he begged.

I didn't.

"You are not alone."

He gave in and started hugging me, bawling his eyes out. His tears were deep, his heart was in pain.

"Promise me, not just me, but to yourself, that whenever you are in pain, call out, scream if you must. Don't let the dark parts of this world consume you. Promise me that they will not take you away. I need you; the world needs you. I want you to be alive, to live, but for that to happen you gotta be stronger, until you're the strongest."

He nodded, his emotions blocking his mouth, but I still felt what he wanted to convey.

What I didn't know was that the world outside was burning. Flames of unknown origin, from cars to trees and the ground, was being burnt to ash. It was converging to one spot, and that spot was the house of James where I was.

My arms felt warm. I looked at my surroundings as a fire blaze spread through the house. I looked at James, his body was warm, and on fire. The world around was.

What is this?

James, what's happening?"

But he didn't respond. He didn't need to, as an ominous voice echoed throughout the area.

"Set your heart ablaze but quench it once you know it's gained enough strength to be wielded in war."

What did that mean? Fiery words materialized before my eyes.

[Your body has refined itself to withstand the heart poison of the huntsman]

Everything around me burned to ashes - my brother, my friends, all turned to cinders. Yet I felt no remorse, no grief. Why?

Then flashes of another life flooded my mind. It all made sense. This was my consciousness, my body urging me to break free from this cursed spell. I was adapting, reforging not just my physical form but my very mindset.

My eyes snapped open, jolting me back to reality, back to the trials that lay ahead. That haunting vision was over, but not the battle.