"It's 22:40,Sunday November 19th, and yet I'm here laying waiting for her to reply my text..Maybe she fell asleep. Or maybe buzy with something that she doesn't have the time to be with me. Even today,just for an hour being with her made me felt it never happend. Damn it,it sure hurts alot when you love someone too much. As qoutes once said;
Dont love too much
Dont care too much
Because that too much would hurt you so much.
Loving someone too much is not a good thing cause it only hurts you more then a knife stabbing in the heart.
Hearts is like a machines,if you over used it too much it would break.
If a man learns to love,he must also bare the pain of hate.
"THIS IS HOW THE WORLD WORKS"
"The longer you want to live,the more you want to seek curiousity about this world,the more you will somehow realise that what only exist is just suffering. What do we get to this thing we all call 'Living?' I can't stop myself from loving her too much. I'm scared..scared to loose her. I know she's a noble and I'm a poor weak boy who somehow got this stupid system that doesn't make sense. The only thing the system offers was 2 things:
*Delete emotions
*Holding on pain
" I need to be much stronger. I'm still not enough. I need to change my fate,I need to make her happy.."
*SYSTEM: Even if she lied?*
"Yes. Even if she lies I will still love her. Even if she has shortcoming I would still love her,Even if she sick I would still love her,Even if she oneday fall in love with someone, I would still love her. Because I promised. I made an oath. To love her with my own life. Even she breaks her promise again and again as last time,I will still love her. Because I SO FUCKING GODDAMMIT FRIKING LOVE HER YOU HEAR ME SYSTEM! I DON'T CARE IF I DIE,I DON'T CARE WHAT MY JACKASS FATHER THINKS ABOUT ME AND HER,I DON'T CARE WHAT MY FAMILY MEMBERS THINK ABOUT ME AND HER. I DON'T CARE THE CONSEQUENCES I HAVE TO CONFRONT. MY FEELING IS PURE AND NOTHING CAN CHANGE THE WAY I LOVE THAT IDIOT. YES SHE HAS ALOT OF PROBLEMS,MADE ALOT OF MISTAKE,BROKE PROMISES BUT EVEN THO,I STILL LOVE HER."
*SYSTEM:But do you think she really loves you? I never see any prove she loves you. I only see pity and obeyance towards you. Maybe even the kiss she gave were just to confort you.*
"SHUT THE FUCK UP SYSTEM.YOU USED ME AND NOW I'M USING YOU. SO SHUT THE FUCK UP."
*SYSTEM COMMAND,ACHIEVE LEVEL 10.
-SKILL UNLOCKED
-DAILY QUEST:
50 PUSH UP
50 SQUATS
50 SET UP
2 KM RUN
Time set : 07:00 am-08:00
•FAIL TO ACHIEVE QUEST: NO "EATING" FOR A DAY.
•REWARD: $5.
*SKILL LEVEL UP:
-SKILL COOKBOOK LEVEL 5.
-SKILL FULL CLEAN LEVEL 5
-SKILL REFRESH LEVEL 6
-SKILL QUICK LEARN LEVEL 6
"Let me fokus on myself more. I need to become stronger. I have to be much stronger. I admit it but loving her is my choice. Being happy or getting hurt its my consequenses. I can't change her but I can advise and love her. Only that I can give. I don't have much money on myself as I said before,working at a shop that pays me just affort enough to eat,and medicine for her, starting today,I'm quiting smoking finish the depts I was told to pay off and after that I'm gonna save enough money to buy her the good she loves, some medicines even I can't affort to eat what I want. I just want to see her happy as her sister wishes to see her to be, Happy."
*Lucious now sitting,writing something,after a few minute packing his stuff for work tommorow and cleaning throwing the rubbish out.*
" I want to marry her. I know it's selfish but if we are ment to be,theres always a way. I can only try to fix my relationship. But if oneday,all falls apart,I swear, I would never love anyone anymore. I rather be evil then kind hearted. Kind people always be played. But one thing for sure;
I use the system.
The system uses me.
" Its already 23:19,almost 00:00. My anime would arrive tommorow morning. But for now I need to go to sleep."yawn as his eyes felt heavy and his legs felt numb and ichy."
"Goodnight my little Aurora..see you next time if you have the time and don't be sad okey after reading this. Just so you know,I love you,I can't change you but I can love you and advice you. It's your choice to pick. And again never make promises you can't keep and don't feel guilty okey sweetheart."
END OF CHAPTER 4.