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Is It Wrong to Abusing Cartoon Tropes in Dungeon?

What would happen if someone were given the chance to use Cartoon Tropes in a world of swords and magic? Madness! Absolute madness! Armed with the body of a certain blue cat, let's join Altair in bringing chaos to the dungeon of swords and magic! ... "I may not have magic... but have you ever been shot by a shotgun that can curve over a kilometer?"

XElenea · Anime et bandes dessinées
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34 Chs

13 Strange Weapons

Goliath, the 17th floor's boss, was taken down right in front of Altair in less than half a minute.

Such efficiency... even some Level 5 adventurers couldn't manage that.

Lili had seen Level 5 adventurers fight before. Although she hadn't encountered many of them, spending so much time in the dungeon meant she occasionally witnessed Level 5 easily wiping out monsters on lower floors. Their battles, while clean and swift due to their overwhelming stats, couldn't compare to how effortlessly Altair had dealt with Goliath.

Altair, a mere Level 1, had somehow dispatched the floor boss with such ease... Could those weapons be divine items?

While Lili stood there in shock, Altair had already walked up to the magic stone left behind by Goliath. He patted it, contemplating how many rounds of ammo he could make from it, all while calling out to Lili.

"Hey, Lili, can you carry this magic stone?"

"Uh... no problem. It'll be heavy, but I can handle it."

As a supporter, if she couldn't carry heavy loads, what was she even there for?

Snapped back to reality by Altair's voice, Lili quickly responded.

"Alright, then it's all yours."

Altair patted the stone before moving over to retrieve the two unexploded C4 charges. He couldn't afford to waste them, better to save them for the next battle.

In just under a minute, he disarmed the charges, and Lili had managed to pack away the enormous magic stone. Thanks to her oversized pack, she fit the entire stone inside. However, the sheer size of the bundle made her look like she was carrying a small mountain on her back. Her tiny frame, bent forward to balance the load, appeared comically disproportionate.

"Altair-san, I'm ready." Lili said with a strained voice under the weight of the pack.

Altair glanced at her, her entire body tilted forward to keep her balance under the massive burden.

"Good. Let's head back. We've accomplished what we came here for."

Altair couldn't help but think how fortunate they were. Today was Goliath's respawn day. Although they had waited two hours, it had paid off. The haul namely, that massive magic stone would last him for a while. More importantly, he could finally upgrade his rocket launcher.

His current rockets were basically just glorified C4s, stationary explosives fired off at a target. They didn't pack any real additional punch.

But things were about to change. With such a large magic stone, Altair could modify his launcher to fire pure magic stone rounds. Soon, he'd have a beam cannon!

After all, with a face like his looking so much like Saber's, it'd be embarrassing not to be able to fire at least one beam attack.

Altair chuckled to himself at the thought of wearing full armor, wielding a sword, and tricking his enemies into thinking he'd engage them in close combat, only to whip out a rocket launcher and blast them with a beam cannon. The mental image made him quicken his pace.

"Let's go. We need to head back fast."

"Understood, Altair-san!" Lili hurried after him as best as she could under the heavy load.

On the way back from the 17th floor, Altair stuck to his earlier approach, avoiding fights when possible. With Lili already carrying the enormous magic stone, there wasn't much room left for more loot. In the unavoidable battles, Altair would quickly dispatch the monsters and gather their magic stones himself, while Lili focused solely on hauling Goliath's colossal stone.

Since the magic stone was so heavy, Lili's pace was slower, and the return trip took them longer.

As someone who lives in the modern day, Altair, not exactly an athletic type, would've been exhausted just from entering the dungeon if it weren't for his body's enhancements.

After an hour of trudging, the two of them finally returned to Orario.

Altair squinted up at the sun. Glancing at his watch, he saw that it was only 3 PM, still plenty of time to grab a snack.

"Altair-san, should we head to the Guild?"

"Yeah, let's go to the guild."

That magic stone was far too large to deal with on his own. He'd need the Guild's help to process it. More importantly, he didn't want Lili to know his true identity or the location of his Familia's base.

Avoiding attention was impossible, though. With Lili carrying such a huge bundle, it would've been normal if they were part of a larger Familia returning from an expedition. But with just the two of them, people couldn't help but wonder what was inside that massive pack.

They attracted stares all the way to the guild.

"Eina-san, could you please prepare a meeting room?" Altair asked.

Eina Tulle, a half-elf receptionist who was responsible for handling Altair, looked at him quizzically. She was also the receptionist for Bell Cranel, the rookie adventurer.

"Uh... Altair-san, what's this...?"

Eina glanced between Altair and Lili, tilting her head in confusion.

"It's something I need to handle privately in the meeting room."

"Alright, follow me."

Though curious, Eina led Altair into one of the Guild's meeting rooms. Moments later, a loud gasp echoed from inside.

"It's... gigantic!"

Lili had just pulled the enormous magic stone from her pack and placed it on the table, leaving Eina staring in disbelief.

"Altair-san, did you rob a large Familia or something?"

"Do you really think I could rob an entire Familia by myself?"

"Well, with all your strange weapons, I wouldn't be surprised if you took advantage of some chaos in the dungeon and stole it."

"Wow, is that really how you see me?"

Altair slumped, his face bearing the deadpan expression of a certain famous detective.

"But this is a floor boss's magic stone! Don't tell me you fought the boss alone and killed it?"

"Actually, yeah, I did."

Altair leaned back in his chair, arms crossed behind his head, with a smug grin plastered on his face.

"Just like you said... with all my strange weapons."