Queen Piccolo?

It had been about five months since I had returned to the dragon ball world, the skeleton I mutated had turned into a badass lich and the Berserkers I fused had become far stronger than they were originally.

I was sitting on the couch today, watching tv and I saw the damndest thing on the news today.

A female Namekian calling herself Queen Piccolo, claiming that she had taken over the earth and then she made some laws, including that everyone should steal, that there shall be no more police activity, you cannot utter words such as "peace" or "justice" or she'd become quite angry, and that there'd be a lottery to see which province she'd attack next. And as luck would have it. It was the one I am currently in.

So, angrily I flew up to the palace where she was currently residing and challenged her to a battle.

And here I am now, fighting a tall, beautiful light green woman with dark green hair who is literally shouting about how I'm powerful enough to become her husband and that we should rule the world as husband and wife.

"Uh... no, sorry. Already have a woman I love, you see... and I don't exactly think she'd be comfortable with me two-timing her" I said with a sheepish grin as I punched her through a wall.

"Ah, well that's fine. We'll just share!" Queen Piccolo said as she got up and tried to punch me in the face.

I swiftly dodged and kicked her in the gut, causing her to stumble back in pain.

"Nah, still don't think she'd be all that comfortable... well, actually... maybe if... hmm... Nah, I don't want some sort of love triangle... or square... or other shapes, it'd take up too much time just trying to please everyone," I said with a smirk as I punched her in the face, knocking her out, "Now. Just... don't get up, or I'll have to do it again"

"Prepare to die Pic- huh? Who are you?" A bald man with three eyes, who I recognised as Tienshinhan asked me as he flew over.

"Uh... I'm Tomant, the dude that just totally wrecked her... did you know that she basically just proposed to me? I mean, I'm flattered and all... but, I've already got a girl I love... and I don't think she'd be all too comfortable with me bringing an evil tyrant home and saying "Hey babe, this is Piccolo, she's gonna be girl number 2"... yeah, I think I wouldn't survive the night after that... hehe" I said with a sheepish grin as I rubbed the back of my head.

"Wha-how did you beat her?" The man asked.

"Simple, I'm stronger thus I win, also... I didn't get your name... unless you just want me to call you Mr Triclops, because I will" I said.

"My name is Tienshinhan, and I... thank you for your help Tomant," Tienshinhan said as he bowed politely toward me.

"Ah! You're the guy Goku was talking about, right? The guy who beat him? Good job dude! Totally deserved that win!" I said with a large smile as I pat him on the back.

"You know Goku?" Tienshinhan asked.

"Well yeah, my brother and I were there when he was born, we were best friends with his older brother too... may he and their parents rest in peace," I said with a sombre smile.

"Oh... uh, so you've known Goku for a long time then?" Tienshinhan asked.

"Well yeah, I'm also... sort of his first teacher? I mean, Gohan could also be if you think about it... but, I taught him quite a few things myself, which I had learned from Master Roshi, Ox King and Gohan" I said.

"Wait, you're a turtle school student?" Tienshinhan asked.

"Yeah, my brother and I, he said we were some of the most talented people he'd ever met. And now, we can beat him pretty easily!" I said with a grin.

"Wait, you can beat Muten Roshi!?" Tienshinhan asked, shocked.

"Well yeah, when you train with him for like ten years, you pick up on his habits, strengths and weaknesses... quick tip, if you want an instant knockout, just throw a porno magazine at him, there'll be so much blood! Haha!" I laughed.

"O-okay... so, uh... what are you going to do with her?" Tienshinhan asked, as he pointed at the unconscious form of Queen Piccolo.

"I don't know, maybe try and reform her? I mean, it'd be kinda useful to have someone with that cool ability to basically puke minions... and if she wished for eternal youth... then she could constantly make them and have an army of demons at her beck and call... and if she was reformed to become a good guy, we could have an army of demons helping us defend earth... alongside my robots" I said with a smile.

"That does sound like a decent idea... but, there's a huge flaw... how would you reform her?" Tienshinhan asked.

"Simple. Dragon Balls" I said with a grin.

"And how would that work?" Tienshinhan asked.

"Just gotta keep her unconscious for long enough to make sure she doesn't get any ideas! Bye!" I lied as I grabbed the unconscious Queen Piccolo and flew away at Mach Speed to a far away wasteland.

"Now for my actual plan..." I said with a smirk as I cut my hand open and allowed my blood to fuse with her body, causing her to wriggle and writhe until it finally stopped.

[Congratulations on getting a new summon, Queen Piccolo] The System said.

"Why thank you System, I believe she will be quite the addition... now, onto other matters... why is she a female?" I asked.

[The world here isn't EXACTLY similar to the one you know, mostly some characters will have different genders such as Piccolo] The System stated.

"Ah... okay, that's a bit better... well then... I believe that I must go back home because Launch will probably be worried about why it's taking me so long" I said as I flew off to my home that I recently had constructed with the help of Dr Briefs' resources, it was close to where Goku was going to live so I could train alongside him in the future.

"Wait, system... quick question... are the demons that Queen Piccolo makes loyal to me as well?" I asked.

[To a lesser extent, yes. They may disobey orders if Queen Piccolo makes one that is the complete opposite, but other than that. You're fine] The System stated.

"Ah, good..." I muttered to myself, as I put Queen Piccolo into my summoning space and continued to fly home.