88

"Hey, you okay?" Iris tapped my shoulder, causing me to snap my head back towards her, my eyes wide with alert, dark circles under my eyes.

"Yeah-" I clear my throat lightly due to how raspy my voice was from the lack of sleep I had been getting, "Why?"

"Are you sick?" Iris questions, "You're shaking- you look like you haven't slept in days- you're breathing really hard-"

"I'm- I'm fine." I stutter out, shutting her down immediately, touching her shoulder in a reassuring manner, before turning my attention back to why we were actually here.

Apparently, Savitar was back, and now messing with Wally. Wally was finally fast enough to save Iris from Savitar. Wally had kept whatever was happening to him from Savitar to himself, which made Barry even more upset, causing him to practically kick Wally off the team. We now stood where we once were a few weeks ago, Julian hooked up to the device that connected us to Savitar; for communication.

Julian's distorted voice sounded through the room, "Bow before my greatness. Be at awe when you are in the presence of the Almighty."

"Oh, shut up-" I shot him a look, "That's complete nonsense."

"I wouldn't be talking if I were you." He gazes at me longingly, "You may be standing right here running your mouth, but believe me, when I am free, you will get what's coming for you. You will get what should have happened to you. It's only a matter of time. You have no idea what's coming for you, and it will happen when you least expect it. Your friends trying to change the future, it's affecting yours."

"What the hell do you mean by that?" Barry asks, crossing his arms, the look on his face remaining from before, showing that he definitely wasn't happy.

"The double has some unfinished business." Julian simply says, confusion running over me, as he opens his mouth to say more.

Barry cuts him off, "Enough. You were a man. Like me."

"I'm nothing like you, Barry." Savitar's demonic voice sounded through Julian, "You're cruel, selfish. In my perspective, you're the big bad."

 "Where are you?" Barry asks, "You said, I trapped you somewhere in the future. Where?"

"The only place that you could think of. The only place that could hold me." Julian spoke.

"How long have you been imprisoned?" Barry questions.

Julian kept his stare on Barry, "Long enough to lose my mind several times over. It's only my will that keeps me on this side of sanity."

"You know it's funny," Cisco starts, "When I think of sanity, I don't necessarily think of Savitar."

"Well, that's because you're small, Cisco. You've always been small. Reverb told you that you could have been a god. But instead, you'd rather work as tech support." Julian spat at him.

"You wanna tell me why we're enemies?" Barry brings his hand to his chin, keeping his other arm folded across his chest.

Julian shot him a look, "Because we had to be. Only one of us could live. You thought that Thawne and Zoom were your biggest foes, but. But it's me. It's always been me, Barry."

"Man, what did we ever do to you?" Joe snipped.

The outburst couldn't be held back when Julian shouted, pure Savitar threaded into his voice, "You took everything from me! I never asked for any of this, Joe. I am only this way because of you. All of you!"

"When do we meet?" Barry questioned again.

"Not long now. You're there when I become who I am." Julian spoke.

"You're saying that I created you?" Barry asks yet again, just prying into Savitar with his questions.

"Oh, no. I created myself, Barry. Only I can bring out my greatness." Julian said.

Barry scoffs, "Your greatness? Well, you're still trapped, wherever you are, and I don't know how you're gonna escape. I mean, we got rid of the Philosopher's Stone."

"Did we?" Julian stood, egging Barry on, "I am closer to my freedom than I have ever been. Every step, every move you make, only brings me nearer to it. I only need one thing."

"Man, do you love to hear yourself talk." Iris mutters.

"Iris, trying to show that you're not afraid? But I know you are." Julian spoke, "I'm sorry that you have to die. But it's you or me. And despite your feeble efforts to change the future, you can't, because I am the future, Flash. Barry, you've had to suffer worse than anyone. You've endured pain your whole life. Your mother, your father- trust me, you'll never get over this."

Before he could say anything else, Barry had disconnected the chord, breaking the communication between all of us, and Savitar.

-

I stare at the case file in front of me, seated on a stool, leaning into the kitchen island. I pressed my fingers to my temple, staring at the papers in front of me. I sigh, tossing my pen onto the case folder, walking over to the medicine cabinet, swinging it open, grabbing the bottle of Modafinil. I tighten my messy ponytail, before popping back another two pills, washing it down with the whiskey that sat in the nearly empty glass.

I had been taking so much Modafinil, that I hadn't slept in days. I was having many side effects, but I wasn't bringing it up to anyone. I was too focused on my work, and everything that was on my mind.

I set the bottle on the counter, letting out a small cough, before returning back to the work that sat on the island. Barry came in through the front door a few hours later, his eyes landing on me, "Hey, how was your day?"

I barely nod, not paying attention to what he had just said, my hand shakily writing down notes on a separate piece of paper, not realizing I was writing about what Savitar had told me earlier, rather than the case I was so stressed about. Barry spoke up again, leaning into his elbows on the counter, looking right at me, "Do you need help with anything? You've been working on that case for days."

"Hm? No-" I mumble, my eyes scanning the documents, as I could feel his stare on me, as I wouldn't dare to look up at him.

"Are you okay?" Barry's question snaps me out of my focus, my head snapping up, my gaze landing on him, my eyes wide with alert, "What's wrong?"

"What?" I exhale, my breathing becoming harder by the second, as I could feel slight drowsiness come over me, my eyes darting to the Modafinil that sat on the side counter under the medicine cabinet, causing me to mentally curse at myself for not putting it away earlier, my eyes darting back to him, "Why would you ask that?"

"Your hair's up." Barry points to my ponytail, "You never have it up unless you're really stressed or something is bothering you."

"I-" I was at a loss of words, knowing he knew me too well for me to lie my way out of this, "The case- It's already been dismissed. It's just, the case. Man murders wife. Has a kid. Kid must go to some sort of foster home. I mean, come on. My foster family didn't care where I was if they kept getting their checks. If I didn't have Joe to keep me in check- I wouldn't be- here. I just feel really guilty for this girl. She's only 13."

"Let's hope she has her very own Joe West to keep her in check-" Barry grabs my slightly shaking hand, causing me to drop my pen back down onto the counter, "And her very own Barry Allen to love her the entire way."