My New Computer and Opening a Bank Account

I entered a computer store that sold individual parts and built computers to customers' specifications. It was a small, locally-owned shop, but it had almost everything a person could dream of that was available to normal people.

Rather than buying something off the shelf, I preferred to specify something I wanted. It always seemed to work better, granted you put it together with the right parts.

A young man in his twenties, whom I recognized as the owner's son, was at the counter. He had helped me before.

He looked up from his work on a laptop, "Welcome to Computer Smith, I'll be with you momentarily."

Finishing the installation of what looked to be a new stick of RAM, he snapped the back of the laptop back on, pressed the power button, and set it to the side, "How can I help you this fine day?"

"I'd like you to put together a desktop for me, using the best components available. Would you write me up a quote?"

He gave a small laugh, "I was just messing around earlier, trying to see how much the grandest and fastest computer would cost me."

He pulled up an invoice on the computer next to him and turned the screen towards me, "I currently have it at $72,458. However, some parts can be switched out with only a marginal decrease in performance, and this would bring the cost down by a lot. Would you like me to see exactly how much?"

"No, just do this one. When will it be ready?"

He looked ecstatic and raised his arms in a praying gesture, "Dear Mr. Computer God, you've answered my prayers! I really get to put it together!"

"Oh, sorry. I got too excited. Will it be cash or card?" He came back to reality but still looked like he'd faint from excitement.

This guy is a little amusing.

"I only have $13,000 on me right now and no card. Can I bring my debit card by when I pick it up?"

"Certainly, we charge a 10% deposit, so that's only... $7,245.80."

I just gave him $8,000 to make it easy, "When will it be done?"

"I'll get right on it; you're now the first in the queue. I'll have it done in about 30 minutes."

I nodded and left the store for the bank.

I reached a local bank that had branches all over the city, the same bank I used to have an account with.

Out of sight, I added as much money as the briefcase could hold and then purchased a second one. In total, I now had $4,800,000 between both cases. Then I bought one of the massive military-sized backpacks and put another $20 million in it. This is definitely going to be odd, but what can I do? Kitty refused to help me add money to a bank account.

The teller didn't look like she was going to be any fun with that arrogant smile.

Seeing there wasn't another one, I sighed and walked up, "I'd like to open an account."

"You have to make an appointment. You can only do it for tomorrow. We don't take appointments today."

"If I want to deposit over $24 million, do I still need an appointment?"

She snorted, "You can't have $24 million. Look at yourself carrying around a backpack like a homeless person before making up lies. Handsome and poor, what a shame your looks went to you."

I was completely unamused and could tell I wasn't going to get anywhere with her.

I sighed, "Can I speak to a manager then?"

She looked angry, "The manager has no time for people like you."

Alright, whatever then. I need a phone.

I turned around, and she spoke again, "That's right, leave. The manager doesn't have time for you."

I'll skin the bitch, but later. Not now.

I walked to the grocery store around the corner, purchased a phone and called the bank's main office.

"This is Cold North Bank; how can I help you today?"

"Hello, I was just in one of your branches wanting to deposit over $24 million and open an account. The teller said I was a liar since I'm wearing a backpack. The backpack has some of the money I want to deposit. And when I asked to talk to the manager, she told me the manager doesn't have time for people like me."

"I'm terribly sorry for your experience, sir. Would you please tell me the name of the employee? Even regardless of whether or not a customer of our bank has $24 million, they should not be treated that way. I will have one of the managers from the main branch meet you personally; what branch would you like to meet at?"

I gave her the name and the same branch I was next to then waited for about 10 minutes until I saw a grey-haired woman wearing a name tag of the bank with her name and position on it, then entered behind her.

I saw a 25-30 year old man standing next to the teller from earlier with a trace of irritation on his face, completely unnoticed by the teller who was trying to chat with him.

When she noticed the woman I was following, she greeted her, but then noticed me and pointed, "Didn't I tell you to get lost? Get out of here. No one has time to meet you."

She peeked at the man next to her as if looking for approval but was met with a frown.

The woman and he spoke at the same time, "You're done. Get out."

She was stunned and slowly turned away in a daze, leaving the building.

The woman turned to me, "I'm so sorry about this Mr. Cyrus. Would you allow me to personally set up your account?"

"Sure."

I followed her into an office, and she pulled out some papers. I set my bags next to the chair, and we sat down. She began explaining what I needed to sign and that there was a $25 minimum to open the account.

I just pulled up one of the cases, "

Here is $2,400,000." I opened it and showed her.

"I will have someone come to collect it immediately."

She got on the phone, and three people walked in. One picked up the briefcases while another tried to lift the backpack. He pulled as hard as he could, and his face started turning red from the strain.

Ummm, was I the first person to break the rules? I forgot paper was heavy. That pack should weigh around 440 lbs... I feel stupid. How can I face the girls when I was the one who made up the rules?

Well, nothing can be done at this point. "Umm, you guys can take it out of it."

Even the guy holding the briefcases was starting to droop under their weight while waiting.

They left, saying they'd bring back a cart.

It took them about 20 minutes to count all the hundreds and come back with the total I already knew.

After she knew that the amount was correct, she finished the process to open the account, and I saw my money appear in it.

She went into another room and came back with my card; it was still warm, like a new driver's license.

"Can I get six more?"

She didn't ask why and just went to get them.

After a while, she came back and handed me a thin stack, and I was a little disappointed they were cold except the top one.

"Is there anything else I can help you with today?"

"No thanks, that's all."

After leaving, I went back to the computer store to pick up my new computer.

The guy was still excited, "Bro! Your new rig is so sweet! I'm honored I got to build it."

I grinned and paid the remainder of my bill before leaving, carrying my new computer. He looked heartbroken as I left, and I almost felt like I was stealing his dream girl or something.

I stored it after I left so I wouldn't have to carry it around and headed to my next stop, the hotel.

I reached the hotel, and Rhonda greeted me with a worried face, giving me a bad feeling.