Fear of the past!

This chapter is unedited, so please excuse the grammatical errors.

Enjoy!

...

Bai Xi's Pov:

The realisation behind the motives of hao family made fear emerge from deep within me and I felt anxious about this whole situation. All of it doesn't look good.

I took out my phone and pulled out my chat with Si Yihan from this morning, the last message was of early this morning.

"I fell asleep thinking about you and woke up missing you badly. Any chance you missed me too, baby?" his message made me blush the First thing in the morning.

"Nope, too busy!I replied with an hint of mischief.

"Oh! How'd you sleep, sweet thing?" His endearments got me excitedly shifting on my toes.

I replied back, "yeah, like a baby!"

"My baby!"

I felt too flustered and didn't know what to say back so I didn't say anything after that.

"Any plans for tonight?" Another message popped up during lunch asking me about my plans.

I felt regret that I would have to decline his invite because I miss him too and want to meet him but I already have plans I am spoken for, so all I can do is deny. I have to stop by the base later and I am not sure what time I'll be free, so I can't help but to say no.

I asked hopefully, "How about tomorrow?"

"Sorry, but tomorrow I have to go on a buisness conference, in London. It may take me more than a week. It's crucial to attend it or I would have postponed it."

My mood deflated like a balloon and I couldn't help feeling regret about not getting to meet him today. I wish I didn't have any plans for tonight.

I sighed and wished him a safe journey. Though I won't be able to see him for sometime, still thinking about him makes me feel happy.

The whole day there was goofy smile on my face as I kept thinking about him and our conversation.

I moved and completed all of my work for the coming week, that was..... completing the paintings for exhibition, submitted my closure of the mission of Sisuzane'.

Later, I went to the base, it was owned by my senior whom I met in boarding school. He taught me all I know about fighting, surviving and then martial arts. He handed me over one of his units to look after. So I had one team of people under me who I lead and guide on the missions either as team or solo.

As college would be starting tomorrow, I had one last thing to do before I finally hit myself with all the work.

I went home to change and applied a layer of makeup and changed myself into male clothing . My makeup looked flawless and without any blemish. Years of practise made me pro in this.

There is a race held in Tai Valley, every last Saturday of the month and today is Saturday. Racing is another escape of mine which I learnt when I was in a period....where I was barely able to deal with myself. I wanted to get lost and I found a way through this. So I learned it braving the dangers to forget everything. I was trying to forget myself and this seemed the only way where I can be someone other than what I was.

Whenever I have to think hard or don't think at all and just be reckless I come here. It distracts me and the thrill of chasing keeps me from feeling anxious, so I play long enough to ease my anxiety riddled mind.

I first went to Shen Hue's to take my car which I usually parked at his, considering his identity and all. He won't be looked over for having a sports car and I get to have his garrage space to park. So it stays there and I occasionally take it out for romping in races.

It's all pink and lustrous, so I don't have to be worried about Shen hue breaking it because however much he loves the model, he won't sit in it due to it's color. It's hideous for him and he sweared on it that he would never be seen in this.

I got out without any delay as Shen hue wasn't home, so I drove the car to the track.

I reached there on time as there was already a huge crowd present, not minding the hour. I skipped to the end where the starting line of the race was marked. I stopped at the starting line as people all around hovered around my car. I got out trying to hold the girls at arm length, as I made my way to the back where a muscle packed man stood.

He nodded at me and asked "Number six?"

I replied with a yes before he place the bets on the board and announced the race.

I made my way back to my car as I got inside. My one of the opponent hunter, nodded at me and I nodded back . He knew I am a regular here. I have raced against him many times and he never ever won against me so he is a little sour about it.

People stepped back when the refree blew the whistle and a girl stood between the race track as she motioned with her hands and body. My car zoomed fast out but then I slowed down intensionally.

I let those behind me get in front as I waited for them to zoom past me. They had to slow when they reached the curve as it is too risky, but I stepped onto the accelerator and instead of slowing continued with the speed making a sharp swerve around the curve and zoomed past the other two. I was able to win the race precisely. I took the win and went back to Reiner the muscled man from earlier.

I went back towards my car which I had parked at the back and drove back home. I don't stay long after the race as it gets too much crowded here.

...

That was the highlight of my week, other than that it was all boring and tiring.

College started and I jumped back to into my schedule of classes , art exhibitions and small missions here and there.

It was finally Friday and I was able to extricate myself from the work and go to a dinner with a couple of friends.

The dinner went without a hitch and my life seems to be on track like always except a few scuffles here and there.

I took a cab to my apartment but since the atmosphere was beautiful I asked the driver to drop me few blocks before my place. I plan to walk the rest of the way home as the weather is beautiful, a little chill in the air just after that of the rain.

I was almost at my apartment gate and was walking towards it but stopped halfway and turned to the man sitting in the car parked at the curb on the side of my apartments gate.

I couldn't see clearly from the tinted windows but I was able to make the silhouette of someone familiar sitting in the back.

When the man turned sideways, pure unadulterated fear washed over me. I stood there stunned with fear as all the nightmares washed over me. It left me trembling and sweat rolled down my back as I felt panic taking over me.

Something I haven't felt ever since I escaped from the personal hell that was my life. I don't know how long I stood there trembling and shivering from fear or cold, I don't know. All I know is that what I saw was my horrible past this close to me.

I was so stuck into my nightmare for so long that I didn't realise, when a pair of hands clasped on my shoulder shaking me out of my reverie. I jerked and snapped back to reality as I looked at the muscular pair of hands leading upto those mocha brown eyes that I oh so dearly have come to adore.

"Love, hey...Are you alright? You don't look fine...Are you hurting somewhere should I take you to the hospital?" he was saying something and his words registered a moment later. His tone concerned, as he worriedly roamed his eyes all over my frame looking for any signs of injury.

I desperately drowned into those beautiful pair of eyes. Them showing me an emotion that I have never come across....atleast wherever I am concerned.

I didn't replied back and just threw myself into his arms, wounding my arms around his back , holding him tightly. I inhaled deeply, his muscular scent , finally catching on some air.

....

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