Chapter One

The irritating shriek of the alarm clock made Kamji release a groan. Slamming down her hands on the little device, the noises stopped abruptly. She didn't need an alarm clock to wake her up when she had barely slept a wink last night.

Throwing of the sheets, she dragged herself out of the bed and took a glance at the alarm clock. It was a few minutes past six. She was definitely going to be late to school if she kept on at this pace. But strangely that didn't bother her. She didn't care if she missed classes or if she ended up losing her post as the senior prefect and the most likely candidate for valedictorian. Nothing mattered to her anymore ever since her mother died.

Stepping into the shower, she set the temperature regulator to high in hopes that the pain was enough to keep her mind numb and stop herself from recalling the tragic events. But as the steam clouded her vision, Kamji saw herself relieving those painful memories that she so much wish was nothing but a dream.

It was few months ago that her mother had been rushed to the hospital after she was found lying motionless on the kitchen floor. After multiple test, The older woman was diagnosed with coronary artery disease. And although kamji had no idea what that meant, she could tell from the look on the doctor's face that it was bad.

"Your mother fainted due to a heart attack." The doctor said. "We have done the best we can but her condition keeps getting worse."

"But you can do something about it, can't you?" Her voice was shaky ,"Please do something. I don't want to lose my mum."

"We have done everything we can but your mother isn't responding to the treatments. At the moment the only thing that can save her is a heart transplant but unfortunately the hospital doesn't have any available one. Our only hope is to reach out for donations or buy from any medical facility."

"And how long is it going to take to get a new one?" Kamji heard her father ask. He had been away on a business trip but had boarded the first flight back home as soon as Kamji had told him about what had happened.

"Unfortunately I don't know," came the reply, "We can only hope and pray that we get one soon otherwise I don't think your wife can last very long".

"Can we see her?"

The doctor gave a slight nod and led them into one of the rooms in the ICU. A slim woman laid on the bed, her eyes closed. She had an oxygen mask to aid her breathing and so many other machinery Kamji knew nothing about their functions surrounded her. She even recognized a life support amongst them. If not for the fact that the woman was still breathing Kamji would have thought she was dead.

"Mum," she whispered as she approached the sleeping woman. She could barely recognize the woman in front of her. Her mother's once radiant brown skin had turned into an ugly green hue. Taking one of the bonny hand in hers, Kamji couldn't hold her tears anymore and sobbed.

"Kamji." She felt the bonny fingers tighten around hers.

"Mum! You're awake. Should I call the doctor?" she asked as she looked around the room but there was no sign of the doctor or her father. They must have probably gone to discuss more in his office.

"There's no need for that." her mother replied. "How are you doing?"

How could she ask such a painful thing? Kamji thought. Couldn't she see that she wasn't okay seeing her in that condition? Were the tears in her eyes not proof enough?

Wiping the tears with the back of her hands she forced a smile."I am fine Mum, You don't have to worry."

"And what about your brother? Where is he?" The sick woman's eyes darted across the room, her brows creased with worry.

"Somto is at home with the house keeper, Dad said it wasn't a good idea to bring him along." Kamji replied. She wanted her Mother to stop asking questions and save her strength although she knew it was impossible. Her mother always had this character of caring for everyone even when it was her that needed the care and attention.

"Don't cry," the woman wiped a tear from her daughter's eyes, "I promise I will get well and be back home before you know it."

Kamji wasn't convinced.

"Here, I want you to have this", the woman pulled out a heart shaped golden locket from her neck and squeezed it into her daughter's hands.

"No. I can't -" she protested knowing it's worth. "This was Dad's wedding gift to you."

"And I want you to have it." Her mother insisted. "That way a part of me will always be with you even when I am not there."

"You don't have to talk like that Mum. The doctor said your going to get a brand new heart soon. And everything will be alright." Kamji said wishing her face looked as convincing as her voice.

Giving her mother a kiss, she allowed her father who had returned to get a chance to speak to his wife. She couldn't get a lot of what they were saying as her father kept his voice considerably low and her mother was just too weak to speak out. The talk soon ended with the man placing a gentle kiss on his wife's head. Kamji could tell he was hurting even though he had tried to put on a brave face.

"Let's go", although it was an order from her father it sounded more like a plea. Kamji realized that although he tried to act strong, he couldn't bear seeing his wife in such a pitiful state.

"But I want to stay."

"I said It's time to leave Chikamji!" He snapped at her, clearly not in the mood for arguments.

She turned to look at her mother who just smiled. "Listen to your Father. You're a big girl now, you need to go home and take care of your brother and the house."

Giving her mother one last hug, she reluctantly agreed to follow her father back to the house. Little did she know that that was the last time she was going to set eyes on her mother alive.

The sorrowful news had arrived the next morning that her mother had passed away during her sleep. Kamji had bursted out of the house in fits of tears, running as fast as she could to the nearest bus station. She had noticed several people in the bus stealing glances at her but she paid no attention to them. They must probably think she was crazy boarding a bus with her night dress but she didn't care. Getting to the hospital was her number one priority not how she looked.

As soon as the bus arrived at her stop, she jumped off and raced towards the hospital without bothering to pay for her fare. She could hear both the driver and the conductor cursing her but she care less of the insults hurled at her. All that was on her mind at the moment was seeing her mother and making sure she was still alive.

Not bothering with the normal procedure of waiting at the front desk, Kamji breezed through the hospital not slowing down her pace.

She needed no directions on how to get to the ICU where her mother was kept eventhough she had only been there once. Getting to her mother's room, she threw open the door and the sight she saw made her heart bleed. Her mother's body had been put in a bag and some men in pale yellow clothing were getting ready to put it on a stretcher where it would then be taken to the mortuary.

"Where are you taking my mother?" she screamed "Get your hands off her."

"Young lady, I'll advise you to stay back and let us do our job," one of the men said. "Your mother died yesterday in her sleep and we are very sorry for your loss."

This only seemed to infuriate Kamji further as she stormed over to the men, "My mother is not dead and I will prove it to you." Unzipping the bag she released a gasp. Her mother laid cold and lifeless. If she had thought her skin color looked bad yesterday, it looked worse now. And the worse part of it was that she wasn't breathing

"No! mum.Wake up", she screamed, shaking the lifeless body. "You promised that you would come back home. You told me that you would be fine".

"Stop all these madness Kamji!" Her father said as he entered the room carrying her three years old brother in his arms."How can you disrespect your mother's body like that?"

Kamji didn't know what to feel at the moment. she was angry, sad and depressed and she felt like she had to let it out somewhere. She had wanted to scream at her father. To tell him that this was all his fault. If he wasn't always away on business trips and had always been there for his wife then this wouldn't have happened. At the same time she had wanted to blame herself. Only if she had insisted that her mother had gone to the hospital. She could recall countless times she had caught the older woman placing a hand on her chest, face twisted in pure agony. But anytime she brought up the idea of going for check ups her mother just waved it off and said it was just stress.

She felt her father's arm pull her in for a hug and she gave into his embrace, crying on his chest. Somto had started to cry too. But Kamji had no idea if it was because he knew what had happened or if it was because he was hungry. She guessed it must be the later as he was still little to comprehend the meaning of death.

The next events happened in a blur to Kamji. As the news of her mother's death spread, most of her friends and families even distant relatives she had never heard of came to pay their condolences. Even Madam Amaka, who never liked the deceased woman when she was alive had visited once to tell her what a good woman her mother was.

"Kamji" A knock on her door brought her snapping out her ride down the memory lane." Are you still asleep?"

She turned off the shower just in time to prevent her body from scalding under the intense heat of the water. "No dad. I am in the bathroom." she called out

"Well hurry up or you will be late for school." he replied before leaving.

She brushed her teeth and quickly changed into her school uniform. School had resumed weeks ago but her father had suggested she had stayed at home until she got over the shock of losing her mother. She hadn't gotten over it completely but it was worth the try.

Looking at her face in the mirror, she wasn't surprised at the huge bags under her eyes. Consequences of not getting enough sleep, she mumbled as she applied light make up to cover up her sleep deprived eyes. Grabbing her bag pack she went downstairs to the dining room where breakfast was already served. The huge flower vase which stood at the center of the table was filled with withered hibiscus flowers. The feeling of nostalgia eloped her as she remembered one of her mother's favorite duty had always been to replace withered flowers with fresh ones.

Somto toddled over to her making babbling noises as he did. "Karrrji" he shrieked in delight as he raised his hands up in the air, wanting her to toss him up in the air and catch him like she usually did.

Kamji laughed at the fact that he still mistook the 'M' in her name for a lot of R's instead. "Hey little man. How are you doing? " She asked swooping him off his feet and spinning him around.

Somto laughed and giggled, "More Karrrji! More".

"I think that's enough spinning for one day." A middle aged woman said as she stepped into his room. "You don't want the boy vomiting all his breakfast on your uniform."

"Good morning Sarah." Kamji greeted the elderly woman who was their housekeeper. Sarah had lived with them ever since she was a little girl, always helping out her mother with the chores and looking after her and her brother. Kamji had always thought that one day she might get married and leave but strangely she never did. She was somewhat relieved that the woman was still around till now, she was more like their family and had proved to be invaluable in running the household during her mother's absence.

Sarah acknowledged her greeting with a nod and carried Somto in her arms, "Time to get dressed young man." she tickled him.

Kamji smiled as her brother bursted into fits of laughter. She wished he stayed that way forever. On several occasions she had seen him walking with unsteady footsteps, seemingly searching for their mother. But it looked like he had come to terms that he wouldn't be seeing her again. Kamji wished she would as well.

Sarah returned with with a bowl of oatmeal and fruits for breakfast." Eat it while it's still hot. I don't want you rejecting it when it turns cold."

Kamji ate few spoons of the cereal before asking," Where is Dad?"

"He left some minutes ago. Said something about an urgent meeting, I think" the housekeeper replied.

Gobbling what was left of her breakfast, she stood up from the dinning table. "I am off."

"You're not taking the driver?" Sarah asked. she was having quite a struggle brushing Somot's hair. The boy kept wriggling and wouldn't stay put. It was going to be his first day of entering a real school not the usual day care he attended in the past. Her mother had been excited about this moment. She had dragged Kamji along to go shopping for new clothes and shoes. She even bought some note books eventhough Kamji had told her children in kindergarten needed no books. All they did was to eat, sleep and watch sing along songs.

"I will take the bus" she said and gave Somto a kiss before walking out of the door. As she stepped out into the streets, she ignored the shouts of bus conductors trying to get her to board their vehicle. She decided to walk as her school was just some blocks away. Boarding a bus would make no difference as she would still be late either ways. She counted her footsteps as she walked to get rid of the boredom and was completely oblivious of her surroundings until she could hear a very familiar voice call her name from behind. Turning back to look in the direction the voice had come from, she could spot Michael Alade waving at her. He broke into a jog and soon caught up with her.

"God you walk fast Kams", he said, panting for breath. Michael was the only one who had insisted on calling her Kams instead of the usual Kamji everyone else did. She hated the name at first but realized she had no choice but get used to it.

Michael or Mic as she preferred to call him was her childhood friend. They had grown so close having lived in the same neighborhood and gone to the same school together all their lives. It was safe to say they were the best of friends. "A little run and your panting like a puppy," she teased.

Mic grinned, "Says the girl who never beat me in a race. By the way, are you okay?" There was genuine concern on his face as he added the last part. Kamji knew he was talking about the death of her mother. Mic had stayed by her side at the funeral and dropped by most of the times to check up on her. He had always been supportive. Kamji smiled and nodded. Her mother had loved Mic. Always giving him the Lion's share of the bean pudding and cakes she made anytime he dropped by.

"You will be fine, Kams", he pulled her in for a hug. Mic was the only one who had the ability to tell when she was sad no matter how hard she tried to hide it.

She sniffed against his chest."I miss her so much Mic".

"As you should. Everyone loved her Kams and eventhough you can't see her, she is always with you."

"I know." she replied, clasping the gold locket around her neck. She had wondered if her mother knew if she was going to die and had given the locket to her as a form of remembrance. There and then she vowed never to take it off. Suddenly she felt a new energy surge into her and she was ready to move on with life.

"What the —" Mic had begun to chuckle.

"What is it?" she asked looking confused

"You need to look at your face right now"

"You better not be playing another one of your pranks on me Michael," she unzipped her bag back and brought out a mini mirror. Her reflection made her release a gasp. The eye liner and mascara she had applied earlier to hide her swollen eyes was smeared all over her face.

"You look like someone who came out from a horror movie." Mic teased as he brought out a handkerchief. "Here, let me get that for you."

He lifted her chin up so that their eyes met and began wiping at the black smudge. They stayed like that for quite a while doing nothing but staring at each other. Kamji cleared her throat, breaking the awkward moment. "Right. Sorry about that," Mic was slightly embarrassed. "Your face is as good as new."

Kamji wanted to laugh and say her face wasn't new but it was sixteen years old which was quite old but she smiled and said instead , "Thank you Michael."

"For laughing at your horrific face and helping you clean it?"

Kamji smiled, "Yes. And for just being there."

"Anytime Kams," he replied. "Anytime."