Chapter 24

Six years ago:

"Riser still doesn't know why he needs to do this."

"It's because for some insane reason, people think that you need more experience dealing with people than Issei."

"Hey, don't look at me. Even I thought that was a joke at my personal expense when they told me that."

Riser, Jasmine, and Issei all sat in one of the main lounges in the college drinking tea, coffee and soda respectively. All three of them had been roped into their college's shenanigans this time with little room to negotiate, and they weren't particularly happy about it.

Riser sent a woeful glare at the youngest member of their group. The insufferable child was many things, but he was also self-aware enough to know when to keep things in perspective. "I fear this past year with you has only degraded my conversational skills."

"And yet I got along with Sai during that training trip over the summer way faster than you did." The boy countered cheekily.

"The fact that you get along with someone who most believe is dedicated to turning his internal organs into muscles is not a commendable feat, fool." The Phoenix grimaced at the memory. The Maou forced the boy to accompany him to his annual training sessions with his master and met up with the next in line for the Bael family, Sairaorg. Much to his distain, the two idiots hit it off almost instantly, making the entire month long ordeal even more maddening.

"You're just mad 'cause I did better than you."

"I would take offence to that if I was not already familiar with how absurd your existence is."

"Oh my God he's learning." Jasmine gaped, completely forgetting about the coffee she was about to drink. She grimaced as she saw Riser flinched at the "G" word. "Whoops. Sorry."

Riser shot her a glare, but didn't push the matter. She actually meant it this time. "It's fine. There's no point in holding a minor grudge when you're making good on my investments."

That much was true. Riser was one of the largest backers next to the Maou when it came to Jasmine's and Issei's research. The pair had made ridiculous headway over the past year, and should it come to fruition Riser could confidently say that the income to his family's coffers could rival that of its production of Phoenix Tears. At least for a few centuries.

Progress was moving a bit slow lately though. Major steps had been made, and the theory had been proven valid, but the research had reached one of the most tedious and time consuming parts: fine tune testing. Medicine was an awfully prickly and sensitive field to navigate, and one he would not particularly be willing to waste time in if the benefits weren't so tantalizingly lucrative in the long run.

As if reading Riser's inner thoughts, Issei sighed and shook his head. "Stop trying to rush things Bird Person. We're already playing with the expectations and biological functions of over a hundred test cases now. Five different samples spread between them all. You know we have to do this by the book, and you know how stupidly huge that book is."

Technically, a hundred and one cases, but that last participant was off the books. Even if her case was a success, there was no way in hell, no pun intended, that her name would be associated with their project.

"Yes. Yes. I'm well aware of how arduous the testing process of your drug is and how even your irrational incompetence is helpless against it. That doesn't mean I am obliged to be appealed by it." The noble scoffed.

Jasmine shook her head. "It's not our fault. We've hit a wall. As much as we touted that we could pull this off without too much help from the Maou, we're still roadblocked every time we try to even think about moving forward. We need a litigation expert. Our own personal lobbyist."

Jasmine was a dual pharmacist immunologist specialist. Issei was the diagnostician with a deep understanding of gynecology and neurology. Between the two they had managed a deep enough understanding of obstetrics, (i.e. the study of pregnancy and child birth), and related medicine to develop test medication and start developing their papers and gaining attention.

Riser's role was to provide financial and political support. He didn't understand an eighth of what Issei and Jasmine said most of the time once the two got going, but he knew enough to tell that he was sitting on a potential gold mine. Not just financially, but politically. If he was known as one of the first people that supported the drug that addressed the Devil's infertility issue, his reputation could very well surpass that of even his father's.

However, that was where they hit a road block.

Like Jasmine said, they needed a litigation expert. A people person. Someone that could get them through the endless red tape, rules, and documentation so they could finally talk to the people they needed to make any progress and, legally, expand their test pool.

And most importantly, not risk getting their hard work stolen by from assholes that wanted the accolades for themselves.

It was a process that all three of them were inept at. Riser couldn't schmoose or bribe any of the right intellectuals without looking like an idiot in the process. Issei's complete lack of social skills would send their work back more than progress, regardless of his intelligence. And Jasmine could only handle speaking to so many obnoxious older men that droned constantly in circles and more absorbed in their own personal problems before writing them all off as lost causes.

They needed, as much as they hated to admit it, a people person.

"As Riser has told you before, Riser has been putting out feelers for one. The issue is that there are few that have a foot in litigation and in medicine that are not already snagged by larger parties. As frustrating as it is, we may be forced to wait on the matter if issues persist."

Issei groaned. "We can't spread our testing until we get additional legal backing. And those assholes upstairs won't give us the ok until we show them more proof with our tests because they "want to play it safe" and not get possibly screwed over by false positives. It's a fucking closed loop. We can't even figure out who to bribe or blow to break out of this lock."

Jasmine nodded, not at all offended by Issei's offhand remark of potentially whoring her out. It had been her idea in the first place, and she would do it in a heartbeat in order to get out of this political circle jerk. A quick wank or cumshot in exchange for her work being pushed through, being recognized, and get set for life? Fuck pride, she had better things to do with her life than pretend to be an upstanding citizen for a system that couldn't give two shits about her if she played kosher.

The three sighed and sagged in their seats, all depressed and frustrated by their current situation. It was a conversation they had had frequently over the past month, and unless they hit a lucky break with the small test pool they had now, things were not likely to change anytime soon.

They then simultaneously sipped their drinks in perfect harmony. They may bitch and moan about one another, but they had been through too much together to not fall into some mutual habits.

"…"

"…"

"… So how's Canary doing?"

"Stay the fuck away from my sister, brat. For the last time, she's not joining your harem."

"It's your fault for letting him get close during parent's day, Bird Person."

"You're the one that said I needed to make friends my age that weren't interested in fighting me to the death Nee-san."

"Riser had put misguided hope into his parents that they would curb the danger before it got too far."

"Your mother called me charming. She's really nice. She had fun talking to mom. Plus she doesn't speak in the third person."

"We're having a ladies night out next week. Spa, drinks, and male strippers. It's nice to enjoy the show for a change."

"I'm not loaning you any sex toys this time. You lost half of the ones I let you take last month. Took me weeks to get replacements. Those things aren't cheap you know."

"Riser hates all of you. So much."

"Um. Excuse me. You wouldn't happen to be Riser Phoenix, Jasmine Redsmith and Issei Hyoudou, would you?"

The three turned their attention to a voice that did not belong to any of them. Instead, it belonged to a rather slim and unassuming girl in her late teens with shoulder length white hair and crimson eyes.

It was at that moment that the group remembered why they were in the main campus building of their college. Apparently, due to Issei's and Jasmine's peculiar histories, and Riser's connections, the group had become the unofficial faces for the college's eccentric and talented elite. The mad scholarship crew that excelled more than anyone else, but got along with few of their peers.

Jasmine and Riser were Juniors. Issei was technically a Softmore, though most people preferred to call him a flaw in the system, given his age and how quickly he was tearing through the school's courses. And apparently they were getting a freshman pushed onto them this year from the upper management, much to their chagrin.

They suspected that the new unrequested addition to their group was intended by the guys upstairs to, hopefully, reign in some of their more extreme exploits. The fools.

All three blinked at once as reality settled in once more.

"… Hi. I'm Issei. Do you want to be a part of my Ha-urghpfft!" Issei's near staple introduction was interrupted as Jasmine reached over and tilted up his bottle of soda so it slid halfway down his throat, essentially choking him but more importantly preventing him from talking and scaring the poor girl away in the first five seconds of meeting her… much like he had unintentionally done with so many, many females prior.

Next to him, Riser was frozen in place, unable to take his eyes off of the newcomer with a noticeable blush on his face.

That, was the beginning of how everything fell apart.

o. o. o.

Present:

The past weekend could be considered one of the most disorienting that Rias and Sona had ever experienced in their lives.

And for once, it wasn't because Issei was purposefully driving them around the bend.

Just the opposite. With Jasmine around, he was in a near perpetual docile state, and it confused the living hell out of the local Devils.

If he wasn't found napping across the porn star's lap, he was being genuinely productive around the house without a word of complaint. Cooking. Cleaning. Medical checkups. He did it all, not with the bitter and blank expressions he was known for, but with a more childish and innocent attitude complete with puffed out cheeks and a semi eagerness in his eyes.

He still didn't smile. That much had not changed, but he wasn't perpetually miserable for once.

Koneko hated it. If only because more than a few people had noted that Issei was more cat like than she was when he was napping on Jasmine's lap.

Just because he let them pet him while he was napping was no reason to give them all the carte blanche to make fun of her genetics.

And all things considered, she preferred it that no one pet her regardless. Akeno gave off really sketchy vibes whenever she had a go at Issei and she wanted no part of it.

Of course, Issei's genuine period of peace and tranquility quickly came to an end as Monday came around.

"Awww. He looks so cute in his uniform."

And he, someone that was once on the verge of getting his PHD along with several Masteries and certifications before he hit his teens, had to go to High School.

"Do you think he gets gold stars on his homework?" Vali grinned savagely next to Jasmine as they stood just a few meters away from him and the school gates. Both were desperately trying to hold back their laughter as they milked the situation for all it was worth.

"Asami-san would post them on the fridge. She'd be so pwoud of her adowabwe boy." Jasmine crooned, covering her mouth with one of her hands while using the other to hold herself up. She didn't trust her legs to do the job properly for the time being.

Issei, on the other hand, was preoccupied with a heavily blushing face and a rampantly twitching… everything.

"Hey. Hey. Can't you imagine how much he's going to learn in sex-ed?" Vali wasn't in much of a better state, though for different reasons. "He's going to find out so much about how the human body works!"

"Oh! But he has to be careful. Or else he'll be sent to the principal's office!" Jasmine clearly was loving holding this over Issei's head.

Apparently that had been the breaking point for the Sekiryutei, as he turned from his spot and calmly walked not to school or his tormentors, but to a nearby alleyway.

"Aw come on Issei. Don't tell me you actually reached your limit already?!" Vali called at him. "We're just hitting our stride!"

"Do you think he's going to misbehave and skip school?" Jasmine mock gasped. "He's such a naughty boy! Where did we go wrong?"

Contrary to their expectations, Issei returned from the alleyway seconds later, dragging something behind him.

Something that made Vali's face turn as pale as his hair, something that made Jasmine laugh harder than ever.

Issei held in his hands, a particularly large cardboard box.

"Oh shit."

"Get in the box, Ass-man."

It was no longer the time to laugh. It was now the time to panic. "You've got to be, no wait he's not. I-Issei. It was just a joke. Don't go overboard because of a little fun."

Issei's expression grew progressively more possessed. "It's been so long. Like you said. Just like old times. Hell, I'm pretty sure I still have Gregory's contact information. You remember Gregory, don't you? Such a staple example of a professional delivery man."

Gregory had also been the unfortunate postal man most responsible for freeing Vali from prior cardboard confinements when they were little before being shipped off to a different US state, and in one particular event, another country.

Needless to say, the man was terrified of Issei. He'd be even more terrified if he knew that the teen knew where he currently lived.

"Issei so help me if you come any closer with that abomination I will kick your ass in front of everyone and somehow fuck up your reputation here more than it already is. Don't you dare think I won't." Vali would have been more convincing if he wasn't backing up while making the threat and Jasmine was laughing uncontrollably right next to him.

"But I thought you liked the box. Don't you remember all the fun memories we had with the box?"

Judging from his complexion, yes. He still remembered his time in the box quite vividly.

"I am not going back in there you insane psychopath!" Vali switched tactics on the fly and assaulted Issei as if his life depended on it.

Jasmine knew she shouldn't laugh. She was pretty dedicated to being Issei's straight man most of the time. However she had enjoyed poking fun of him too much earlier and her guard was down. Plus, it had been a long time since she saw Vali this unsettled and couldn't help but enjoy the show.

"Ooooh. A highschool boy fight! It's so adorahahahahaha! I can't! I just can't! It's too much! Those two idiots haven't grown up in the slightest!" She wasn't helping matters as she lost complete control and let loose her own bellowing mirth, complete with tears and everything.

"Shouldn't we stop them?" Rias asked Sona from the gates.

"Bitch I said get in the box!"

"Never! Never again!"

"Give it another half a minute so we have enough evidence to punish Hyoudou as we see fit." Sona watched the show impassively. "He's a student of our school after all. Might as well teach him how to behave, if nothing else."

"I thought you didn't do lost causes." Rias sighed as she watched the two teens wrestle, bite, and actually generate a cloud of dust and madness that hid the bulk of their scuffle.

"I don't. That doesn't mean I can't entertain myself with a good excuse."

"And here I thought he was finally growing on you." The Gremory shook her head in defeat.

"Like a tumor."

"That may be, but it looks like that the tumor's making things interesting again." Akeno purred as Issei's bout with Vali intensified.

"Why does he have a bottle of baby oil?" Gasper tilted his head to the side in confusion as the fluids began to fly everywhere. He didn't bother to ask where Issei had gotten said bottle. They all knew better than to ask when he pulled out random things from nowhere.

"And why didn't he break it out sooner." Akeno drooled as the two admittedly handsome teens began to glisten in the morning, giving them all a very tantalizing show.

*Akeno-Vison*

Two handsome young men laughed and wrestled gayly as baby oil flew though the air, making their skin and bodies shine in the morning sun.

"Hahaha! Box!"

"Hahaha! No!"

*Reality*

"Come on. Take the shirts off. You already have the oil out."

"Down Akeno. We're in public." Rias chided, noting students from the school watching the show with varying levels of interest. She wasn't sure what was more indecent at the moment, the show in front of them or Akeno's thirsty reaction to said show.

"As infuriating as he is, Issei is rather creative when he tackles a problem." Kiba's lips twitched. "You might even say he, thinks outside of the box."

"I heard that and will be exacting proper punishment after this!" Vali shouted viciously from a distance.

"That was terrible." Sona's flat expression didn't change in the slightest.

"Was that really necessary Kiba?" Rias sighed.

"It felt appropriate."

"Oi. We might have to step in early. The perv's getting sloppy." Koneko frowned as she sensed Issei's power beginning to flow erratically. Even from here she could see his mouth taking on certain abnormal properties.

"What do you, oh crap, his mouth…" Saji's eyes flickered in concern as he spotted the problem. Normally it wouldn't be a big deal, but Issei and Vali were growing a crowd, and it wouldn't be long until someone noticed his inhuman traits.

Sona clicked her tongue and eyed her surroundings. Casting magic in public like this was always a risky endeavor, especially in a wide open setting with so many people like this. "Rias, I might need your help on this."

"Wait. Look." Before any drastic actions could be made, Rias spotted Jasmine moving already to the half soaked boys that hadn't noticed her approach.

She then clocked them on the back of their heads at the same time, flooring them instantly.

"Boys." She sighed with an exaggerated tone before yanking Issei to her by the scruff of his shirt and made out with him on the spot.

"Holy shit." Saji blinked owlishly as he and everyone else got a full view of the two putting most movie actors and actresses to shame.

"That's not for show. They're using their tongues already. How daring." Akeno blushed, noticing that despite being caught off guard, Issei was giving as much as Jasmine in the display.

"… And how on earth is that any better?" Sona was conflicted now. So much so that she couldn't determine why exactly she was conflicted in the first place.

Koneko however was the first to notice the real purpose of the public display of affection. "They're not just kissing. She's sucking out his dragonic energy."

"What?" Rias blinked and tried to get a better look at the two without getting distracted. Indeed, the subtle signs and changes that were momentarily there with Issei's jawline were gone once again. "Oh, oh she's good."

She did not miss the fact that Jasmine had reached down and was now grabbing Issei's ass, and he responded in kind.

"Really good." Akeno was openly drooling. She didn't care if she was seen, and in her defense, she wasn't the only person there doing so.

"This is getting ridiculous." Sona stepped forward, her intentions abundantly clear.

"No. Wait. Just a few more seconds…" Akeno weakly protested, only because she was still distracted by the show.

"Hyoudou-san. I don't care how you conduct yourself with your friend in private, but please refrain from public displays of affection on school property."

"Mgh. Gwaay. Dn ckblk me." Issei mumbled as he focused on clearly more important things.

Surprisingly, Sona didn't get irritated. In fact, her lips twitched in a way that indicated vindictive amusement. "I am not certain what you believe my intentions are, Hyoudou-san, but I assure you I was only acting on your own benefit. After all, I am certain that you are would not appreciate the idea of being, material, for some of our lesser reputed student body to entertain themselves with."

Issei froze as if suddenly paralyzed and his glazed eyes took on a sharp awareness again.

He noticed the small crowd of students all blushing and watching him.

He noticed the Devils to the side with clearly mixed reactions to his current state.

He noticed Vali tearing apart his box in the background with a frantic and desperate vengeance.

And, he noticed the perverted duo gaping and pointing at him and Jasmine as if they could not believe the reality in front of them.

… Fucking Enabler.

"Motohama. Is that, is that who I think it is?" Matsuda finally found his voice.

"I, am so conflicted. I have never wanted to believe something is true and not at the same time in my life." Motohama was literally crying blood out of jealousy. "Hyoudou! You fucking traitor! Why didn't you tell us?! Why the hell didn't you warn us that you were tight with the goddess above goddesses herself! The Queen! The Great Heavenly Voice of Porn! The-HURK?!"

Motohama's rant would have gone on for a bit longer had Issei not stomped up to the both of them and without warning grabbed them each by their faces.

"The Iron Claw!? It's actually humanly possible? I thought that was just a joke used in anime?!" Someone in the background shouted.

"And he's doing it to both of them at once?!"

Issei didn't say anything at first. If anything, he looked like he wasn't still all there, with the sort of puffy and blissfully peaceful face that belonged on an old person enjoying tea on a pleasant afternoon. Hell, he even had that "warm and toasty" aura hovering over him.

"You two. I hope you know what will happen if you keep talking." He almost purred, just loud enough for them to hear him, a menacing message completely contrary to the image he currently had.

Judging from their increased trembling, yes, they knew.

"I, am very relaxed right now. More than I have been in a long time. You wouldn't do anything to ruin that for me, would you?"

"No! No! Absolutely not! We know the pecking order! Don't kill us Issei-sama!" Matsuda shouted frantically.

"Issei. Be nice." Jasmine crooned, clearly not bothered by the sudden display of violence or his sudden breakaway. "Don't risk the mortality of my fans. That's what I have Vali for."

It should be noted that Vali was preoccupied at the moment setting the box on fire.

"Nee-san. These particular "fans" of yours are the type of idiots that would ask for a handshake knowing full well that they wacked off this morning and never washed afterwards."

"How did you GAH?!" Matsuda's outburst was interrupted by a slight tightening of Issei's hand on his skull.

"You two idiots don't know her. This is the first time you have ever seen her. You don't know her name. You know nothing. No pictures. No recordings. No autographs. No posts or rumors online or in real life. When she leaves, so will any recollection of her being here. Am I understood?" Issei's tone grew slightly harder, as did his grip.

"Crystal! Couldn't be more transparent!" Matsuda shouted.

"On my firstborn child! I swear!" Motohama struggled under the gradually increasing pain.

"Good."

The second Issei let them go, much to the crowd's surprise, the pair bolted to the high school without so much as a second glance at Jasmine.

"Was that really necessary?" The porn star was clearly not amused by the sudden turn of events.

"Unfortunately. Those two are particularly masochistic. You need to go particularly beyond their threshold to make anything sink in." Issei looked around, noticing that there was a good number of people watching him now. He could already feel their eyes boring into his skin, making his stomach churn and his hands tremble. "Damn it."

Fortunately, the others had noticed and expected his reactions early on and had already taken actions to address them.

"Come on." Jasmine sighed and looped one arm over his shoulder and brought him close, almost immediately calming him down a good deal. "Let's get inside. Wouldn't be the first time we've walked together for class."

"… Good thing it's Monday." He muttered as he let himself be steered into the building in front of everyone.

"Why's that?"

"Home Room teacher's usually late from nursing a headache on Mondays."

"Hangover breath?"

"Hangover breath."

"Some things just have no national boundaries."

The pair walked into the school grounds, completely ignoring how the Devils were busy weaving subtle spells to wipe away the general populace's interest in Jasmine. It was too late to take away their memories without generating attention or suspicion, but the former spellwork was easier to cast and hide for situations like this.

Much like it was easy to miss Vali dragging away Motohama's and Matsuda's unconscious bodies behind a few trees in the background.

o. o. o.

"Aaah." Jasmine sighed in content as she lounged lazily on the couch in Issei's room and ate a snack. "After all this time, the thing that surprises me the most is that he kept the couch."

"How broken down is that ratty old thing?" Vali lifted a skeptical eyebrow as he inspected the old momento. It was a grey blue modular two piece sofa with each half capable of unfolding into a small bed if needed. It was made from some natural fiber, but from the underworld, so it held up better than expected. That and it was soft as hell. "It was dated back when he first got it."

"Fuck if I know. All I care about is how much I missed it." Jasmine stretched on it like a cat. "I can't remember how many times I passed out on it back at the school."

"And now you're abusing it while Issei's at his new school."

"You make it sound like he'd be upset that a beautiful woman is enjoying herself in his room while he's away." The porn star stretched erotically, making her chest pop out almost illegally. It would have gotten a reaction from most people, but Vali was numb to her gimmicks.

"I'm pretty sure he'd be more pleased that we make the useless one suffer in it."

The useless one, aka Raynare, was indeed suffering. And in standard Issei fashion, she was miserable in a particularly simple, if not absurd way.

When Issei cleared her of her injuries that morning, he had also given the ok to start her punishment for fucking up her duties. And since he was the sort to multitask, he had decided to mix her punishment with her training.

In this particular case, Raynare was condemned to constantly dance on a stripper pole while Issei was at school.

And by dancing, it meant that she had to constantly go through the vast majority of established pole dancing moves over and over again until he came back.

It should be mentioned that pole dancing in particular was an exceptionally physically demanding and exhausting activity. More than most generic sports and active hobbies in fact. There was a reason why most professional strippers didn't need to go to the gym as often as most people think. Outside of practicing their moves every now and then, they burn most of their weight off on the job.

The Anastasia. The Archer. The Ankle Hang. The Cheba Split. The Broken Doll. The Fang. The Dragon Tail. The Tailpipe.

She had to do them all constantly or else she'd get zapped by the temporary slave tattoo that was inscribed on her body.

"Hah. Hah." Raynare panted as she held herself upside down and aimed her crotch at the ceiling in a tight fitting sports bra and flexible booty shorts that hid none of her body but fortunately kept everything from shaking and making her lose her balance. She was too exhausted to moan at this point, having already been at this for almost six hours now without rest. She couldn't even leave the stage she was on without getting electrocuted to the point of blacking out.

Originally she thought that she was going to have to suffer for hours on end in the buff, but Issei, in typical Issei fashion, told her that the shorts and bra were needed so she wouldn't chafe herself raw and throw herself off balance due to her extra weight after the first thirty minutes.

Leave it to the porn nut to shame a sinful fallen angel to pole dance in his room for hours on end in her underwear because she was too fat and out of shape (by her species standards) to do it properly naked.

She had half a mind to dance nude just to spite him before her other half smacked it for being an idiot.

"How ya holding up Cougar?" Jasmine asked, not really caring about the Fallen's suffering. "You burn off that extra jiggle from those ass cheeks of yours yet?"

"Fuck. You. Monkey." Raynare slid down the pole slowly in a crumpled heap before slowly picking herself up and letting her arms get some rest as she started with the basics again with her feet on the ground.

"No thanks. I like my partners with some life in them. Vali might be interested though. That ass of yours is up his alley."

"True, but what it's connected to is a deal breaker. Gonna have to pass this time." He shrugged helplessly.

"Pity. Hear that Cougar? You just missed your chance to get screwed over by both Heavenly Dragon Emperors."

"I. Can barely. Survive one." The Fallen panted as she more flailed than danced around the pole behind them.

"Nyahaha. That's what most girls say." A voice that was not Vali's or Jasmine's chuckled from the window, grabbing their attention.

"Oh look. A stray." Jasmine deadpanned at the black cat sitting on the windowsill. "I hope it's fixed."

"Oh look. A porn star. I hope it's clean." The feline purred. "Long time no see Jas. Vali. You two look as tasty as ever."

"I'll say it as many times as I have to Kuroka, I'm not a furry. Issei's the one that finds porn in everything, not me." Vali waved her off. "You sure that's safe? You know how he gets whenever someone comes in here without permission."

"It's fine. The windowsill's a grey zone. No harm's done so long as I don't go further than this. I've tested it out over the years."

"Kuroka? The S ranked stray?" Raynare panted while grinding the pole between her legs.

"Mhm. Guilty as charged. Nya." The cat waved a paw and tried to look adorable, failing in the process. "I heard that two old friends were in town and couldn't help myself."

"Seeing as Issei hasn't told us about you yet, I'm guessing he doesn't know you're in the area. I'm surprised. He's normally pretty good at detecting when voyeurs get annoying. Presence and all that bull."

"Don't knock it until you try it Jas. Shit's useful." Vali argued.

"Too much of a pain to learn. I saw what you had to do to get it down. No thanks."

"Who said I was watching him?" Kuroka purred.

"Right. Right. Forgot about the Gremory's sugar addict. Should have remembered that considering how much of a sis-con you are. You're as oblivious to your faults as Issei sometimes." Jas didn't bother to hide her smirk as Kuroka's eyes took a momentary sharp gleam.

"Don't be like that, nya. I do come by every now and then to play the good little kitty. My wonderful fur and soothing purr has been a decent substitute for that cheap piece of jewelry of yours for the past few years for many a night. Not that you would know."

Jasmine flinched. As much as she would like to admit that she's done her best to help Issei given their circumstances, the fact remained that she had kept him at arm's length at a time when he was extremely emotionally vulnerable. Kuroka's interventions, as irregular and unexpected as they were, was probably for the best.

"As much as I would like you two to resume another one of your infamous cat fights, I'm pretty sure that there was a rule set up that barred them inside Issei's room." Vali stepped in, getting both females to huff indignantly. "Might not want to risk him blowing another fuse so soon."

Both women looked away, not wanting to admit the truth.

"We don't see eachother for years and I'm getting treated like this. I don't get what he sees in you, nya."

"Likewise."

Raynare wanted to ask if those two were always like that, but she was too exhausted to care and deal with the extra attention.

"So do you know what's happened or are you just doing a late checkup?" Vali got the ball rolling again.

"I know roughly what's taken place, but I thought it would be good to go to the source for any juicy details I might have missed. Rumors can only do so much nya know." The cat began to groom herself. "I was surprised when I heard that Issei found anyather priestess to play with though."

Vali grimaced. "Ah. About that…"

"Something you forgot to tell us?" Jasmine glanced at him curiously.

"You know how there's a bit of her still lingering in Issei's psyche? Well Gremory had a bit of a talk with it during his meltdown and…" He was bracing himself for the impact. "Apparently, it pleasantly recognized one of the nuns that was under Diodora."

The room was dead quiet for several seconds before Jasmine sat herself up straight. Kuroka was not much different. "… Vali. I hope you aren't insinuating what I think you are."

"I set up a call with Beelzebub the night after we got here through Azazel. She's currently being held in a private hospital for extensive psychological treatment. The travel arrangements to see her are already arranged as soon as we're done here. Maximum guard and privacy. No one sees her without the Maou's explicit permission."

The fact that Vali had managed to get a hold of the Maou at all in the current political environment, where Ajuka had only just recently exposed his brother's crimes to the world, was a feat in itself. Or, rather, it might be better attributed to Ajuka Beelzebub's foresight into assuming this might happen and his dedication to ensuring that no further issues would arise from this unfortunate discovery.

Then again, the true miracle alone might have been that Issei didn't recognize the young woman during the encounter at the Church. If he had…

"Jas…" Kuroka glanced at her comrade, only to be stopped with a raised hand.

She inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly to calm herself down, using the same technique as Issei did when in stressful situations. Three cycles later she had finally collected her temper and thoughts. "I assume we are in agreement that Issei will not learn of this anytime soon?"

"I don't like it but it wouldn't be good if he found out nyow." The cat shifted uncomfortably.

"He'd rush over to where she was before thinking things through and just make everything worse for himself." Vali shook his head. "The best person to tell him that Amalia's still alive…"

"Is Amalia herself. If she's able." Jas ran a hand through her hair in frustration. "… That said, I'd like to know how the fuck she was tricked to being that brat Diodora's toy. Especially after we warned her about the little shit."

"More curiously, why did the Maou hide it from us? Nya. I doubt that Beelzebub was sloppy or stupid enough to not know about this for five years." Kuroka's eyes glimmered with malicious intent.

"Don't. He actually was blindsided by it." Vali shook his head. "You know those experiments some groups were rumored to be running on Evil Pieces?"

"That little shit was handling modified Pieces? Since back then?" Jasmine's eyes widened. Rumors about those things had only barely started to catch wind six years ago, and even then it had been established that the ones made were shoddy works at best.

"Masked her official identity from the system. Bloodwork, magical signature, the works." He nodded. "Beelzebub knew that something was off with his brother's peerage, but even he didn't know their actual identities until he personally got a hold of them just a few days ago. Apparently, Diodora had his own personal circle of connections to officially manage his collection behind closed doors so nobody would get suspicious. Names. Histories. Health checks. Everything. Like I said, it apparently was good enough to fool even Beelzebub."

"And that personal circle is conveniently…" Kuroko purred maliciously, already making the right connections.

"Oi. Cat." Jas interrupted, nodding her head back to where Raynare is.

"Don't mind me. Too tired. To care." Raynare panted.

"If you're that beat after only six hours on the grind, then it's no wonder Issei rips on your work ethic. Normal human dancers can do better than you." Admittedly, Jasmine was pushing it a bit. True, human dancers could pull off six hour stints if they really pushed it, but even they would be unlikely to constantly be forced to do the more complex moves Raynare was cycling through without end.

"Better this. Than the idiot cat. That lied to him."

That had their attention.

"Care to repeat that, crow?" Kuroka didn't bother feign being coy this time, her anger blatantly on display. "That is quite an accusation you made."

"Don't bother. I'm not the one that you have to convince otherwise." For the first time since she started dancing that day, Raynare actually smiled and put some effort into her sensual moves. Her sadistic nature and the pleasure she got from holding one over Kuroka fueled her exhausted body.

"Get to the point. If you're telling the truth, then we need to avoid another shit show before it happens." Vali frowned. "What did Kuroka lie about?"

The Fallen swung around the pole, rubbing it against her core in a simple maneuver that allowed her to rest her legs for a few seconds. "She told him that some grunt was the one that first caught her with her master's blood on her hands."

Kuroka stilled.

"Yeah. And?" Jasmine frowned in confusion.

Raynare smirked and opened her mouth.

"It would be best if you stopped there, nya."

"Kuroka?" Vali didn't miss the air around the cat change drastically. "Is there something you need to tell us?"

She didn't take her eyes away from Raynare, but didn't say anything for several excruciatingly long seconds. Her nails dug deep into the wooden platform she sat on. "… My apologies. It's likely I'm not welcome here. Not for the time being at least."

"We just barely avoided an irreversible fiasco with Issei. Please don't start hiding things from us now." Jasmine's tone was not pleading or in any way negotiable. It was a blatant order.

Unfortunately, that was not enough to change the cat's behavior or her unreadable focus.

"Fallen. Tell me. Did he try to tell Shirone the truth?"

The pressure from the seemingly harmless animal was enough to get Raynare to stop moving. "I, yeah. He did. And it turned out probably the way you pictured it with Gremory's group picking up the slack after it all fell to shit… and then he chased me with two massive dildos for several hours for laughing at him."

A sudden wave of killing intent shut her up. Raynare had been on the wrong side of an argument against several people vastly stronger than her before, but Kuroka's brand was particularly memorable. The feeling of almost being torn apart by claws of an entity that was saturated in natural mysticism was a particularly unique sensation.

"It would be best if you learned from that experience, crow." Kuroka genuinely growled. "That is twice you have made the mistake of underestimating how deep the Sekiryutei's wounds are and the ramifications of agitating them. If he does not somehow dispose of you upon the third offence, I will."

"Careful. She's more or less Issei's property now. Even Azazel's of that mind. Don't do anything that'll make your position worse than it apparently already is." Vali frowned, giving her a stern warning. He didn't know exactly what Kuroka had done to fuck up as badly as she supposedly did, but it was clearly enough to put her in a bit of a predicament.

The room was tense for several painfully long seconds before the cat broke it first with a pained and tired groan. "Nyaaa. What a bother. This isn't nyearly as fun as I thought when I decided to come back."

"Well that's what usually happens when Issei isn't around to be his usual jackass self." Jas shook her head.

"If only." Kuroka stood on all fours and turned to the outside. "I'll take my leave then. If what the help says is true, then I'm nyot welcome for now unfortunately." She paused and turned to look at the Fallen skeptically. "Speaking of which…"

"What? What did I do now?"

Kuroka didn't say anything and merely narrowed her eyes.

"…"

"…"

"…"

Ping!

Zap!

"GHAAAAAH?!"

It was at that point that the tattoo collar around Raynare's neck went off and electrocuted her like some cheap cartoon due to her not dancing.

"Ok. Now I'll go." Kuroka smirked, finally getting what she wanted.

"You fucking tramp! Get back here so I can spay you!" The threat might have been more believable or intimidating if the one shouting it wasn't frantically molesting the stripper pole again like she was some drug crazed nutcase.

"I'll see nya later Jas. Vali." The cat purred with a smirk. "Take care of Issei. He's only just starting to get better again."

With a lazy sway of her backside, the stray Devil leapt off of the windowsill and vanished from sight.

Jas huffed. No matter how long she's known Kuroka, she was never going to get used to that cat. "I hate it when she does that. It's hard to keep any conversation straight when she's around."

Vali was about to say something when his phone buzzed with a message. "… Well, looks like karma does exist. You're working double duty Cougar. Issei's staying after school with the Devils today."

"Father damn it!"

"I'm surprised. I thought he'd make a beeline back here the second the bell rang." Jasmine hummed curiously. "Looks like those clueless gremlins are making more progress than I thought. Somehow."

"Jas." Vali's tone held an unspoken warning.

"I know. I know. Not all Devils." She rolled her eyes and waved him off. "I hang out with you don't I?"

"I'm pretty sure every single person in our group is a poor representative of any demographic Jas."

"Meh." She huffed and looked for something to change the topic. She always tried to do that whenever she was blatantly losing an argument that didn't matter. Her eyes rested on Issei's closet. "Speaking of being poor representations of our species, you want to raid Issei's stash of goodies?"

"Hell no. Regardless of what he has, I'm not trying any more concoctions you make up on the fly for fun. Not after last time."

"Aww come on. I'll play it safe this time since this is Asami's place too. I promise you won't wake up naked in an alleyway three towns over this time." She smirked up and walked to the seemingly normal closet and closed the door. "Now let's see if he kept the pattern the same."

She twisted the knob to the side once and opened it again, only to be nearly enveloped in a slew of tentacles before shutting it again. "Son of a bitch!"

"Eldritch portal on the first tab. Nice." Vali nodded in approval.

"The fuck?!" Raynare gaped. "Why does he have something like THAT set up?!"

"The natural fluids, poisons, and tissues from those freaks are used in more medicine and biological cultures than you think. Loads of chemicals used in today's market are impossible to make without them being fresh from the tap." Jas grimaced as she wiped herself of the slime she was coated in. "Shit. Now I need to find his stash or I'm going to keel over from infections by the end of the day."

"Should I get my phone ready? The last time you were drenched in that shit and got horny from the aphrodisiacs in it, the video from it got an award. If we find Issei's toy chest and go to town, you could probably get another trophy off the cuff."

"And I was stuck in bed and more bloated than a final term pregnant woman with a high fever for the week after that. Not worth another paperweight. Can't even sell the first useless piece of crap."

Jas grimaced as she looked closer at the knob. Twelve ticks. Twelve settings. Two down, ten to go. She had to hurry or else she'd be too oversensitive to speak coherently.

The next setting she had opened up the door to a world that looked like it was the dawn of the primordial era. Storms, explosions, ice, fire, and lightning were rampant everywhere.

The power radiating from it was enough to send chills down Raynare's spine from where she was.

"Private extreme training dimension." Jas wasn't intimidated in the slightest as she closed the door and turned the dial.

This time it opened up to an operating room littered with monitoring equipment, computers, cameras, IV drips, large healing solution vats, and countless other appliances that had longer names than could be bothered with. All in pristine condition.

"Surgical experimentation and recording studio." Again, Jas didn't blink as she closed the door and went to the next option.

This time, she did scream as she was nearly assaulted by countless human hands reached out for her before slamming the door on them.

"Don't remember that one." Vali frowned in confusion.

"You remembered the others?!" Raynare shouted incredulously.

"Fuck… he actually made a closet of hands." Jasmine panted. "It was a conceptual product idea we played with way back. Slap a magic tag on a door frame, open it up, and get a night of perpetual omnidirectional foreplay."

"Huh. That actually sounds like it would sell pretty well." Vali hummed. "Looks like it still needs work though. That batch looked a bit over eager. Not sure how long you'd be stuck in there if you got caught."

"Which is probably why he hasn't marketed it yet. You know how obsessed he is when it comes to product safety." The woman panted. Judging from her increased sweating, the poison from the tentacles was starting to kick in.

"How did he even make that in the first place?"

"Issei bullshit. We gave up trying to figure out how he does half the things he does years ago." Vali shrugged.

Next room was a modernized gym and exercise room. Then a garden. A mini warehouse filled with sex toys. A multipurpose bedroom slash sex dungeon. A fully stocked, albeit unused spa.

After that, a blue haired woman's corpse fell flat out onto the floor.

"The fuck does he have a body for?!" Raynare was getting tired of the whiplash she was getting.

"Huh. I was wondering where he kept that thing." Vali lifted a skeptical eyebrow.

"Now's not the time for dealing with this used piece of crap." Jasmine groaned as she lugged the sack of meat and bone back into the small storage room.

"How are you two not surprised by this? I thought the jackass wasn't so far gone as to indiscriminately murder yet!"

"Calm down. That thing's not a person. It's a medical tool used for testing medicine. A Mary Sue." Vali rolled his eyes. "It lives, breathes and blinks, but no one's there. No mind or soul. You just pump it full of drugs or stab it or whatever, and then cut it open or heal it. Or at least try to. If it works. Good. If not, it resets with a quick couple of spells, and you try again. Good for proof of concept testing. And stress relief."

"Is that why he doesn't masturbate?"

"He's crazy. Not desperate. He hasn't gone after you yet."

"Oi."

"Thankfully, you can also set it so it doesn't smell or decompose if you let it die on its own. Which is nice because I would have killed Issei if my clothes got ruined from this." Jas grimaced as she closed the door again and turned the knob. "Come on. Give me the damn lab already."

She opened it to see a large closet full of labeled jars full of all sorts of chemicals and substances, accompanied by lab equipment and machinery.

"Finally!" She rushed in and began to pull down and open jars at an unnaturally fast pace. From an outside perspective, she was either really desperate or knew exactly what she was doing. Or both.

Twenty seconds later, the woman was downing a small concoction of questionable substances that she had seemingly thrown together on the cuff and breathed a sigh of relief.

"You good?" Vali yawned, more focused on his cell phone than his charge.

"I'm good."

"Did that work or is she just too drugged up to feel anything anymore?" Raynare honestly couldn't tell from where she was.

"I'm responsible for almost a third of all those new pills that the Grigori have been using recently. Don't write me off as some brainless junkie." Jas wiped her mouth.

"If you got a job that high up, the fuck are you doing porn for?"

"Because reasons." Jas got some water from a nearby sink and washed out her mouth. Her improvised cure worked, but it left an annoying aftertaste. "Why did Issei keep you alive?"

"Because… reasons." Raynare looked away. She didn't trust any of them, much less Issei. But she didn't have much choice about who to turn to anymore, and if Issei could make good on his promise, then sticking with him was her best, if not only option.

"Exactly." Jas' eyes scanned the shelves and ingredients displayed with some disappointment. "Damn. Can't have anything else after taking the cleanser. Might as well abuse the spa after this to detox."

"Don't try to wait in there until Issei gets back. I still remember when you pruned up and overheated in the jacuzzi trying that." Vali warned.

"Yes mom." She glanced at him before turning to Raynare and noting just how exhausted the Fallen was while giving a lackluster performance on the pole.

With a click of her tongue, she turned back to the countless jars in the room and started making another concoction on the fly, not bothering to make notes or double check her work.

Five minutes later, she came out with a small bottle of pills. "Oi pet. Take this. You won't last the day without it the way you're holding up."

"A pill?"

"No the bottle." She rolled her eyes. "It's an energy supplement. A strong one. You'll crash like an airplane once it wears off and literally feel like ground zero once you wake, but it's good for long duration workouts like what you're doing. Once a day, only for ones that you will be busy all day for. Any more than that and you'll wish your insides simply exploded. You can have one now, but normally it's best to have it after a massive meal. You're body's going to burn through calories at record speed if you stick to Issei's madness, inhuman or not. You will hate him for it, but you will get results."

"Admittedly, the results are just as horrifying as the process, so it's all matches up, but it still sucks." Vali avoided all eye contact as he tried to suppress the memories of Issei trying to "help" him when they were kids. So many results. So many nightmares.

"Why are you helping me?" Raynare's skepticism was warranted.

"Because the more progress you make, the less he'll bitch about it. And the less likely Asami will get stabbed the second he looks away for five seconds." Plus, the more progress she makes, the faster she'll realize that it's in her best interest to do what's best for Issei. If she loses him, she loses this shortcut to power she's on. And her life, but idiots tend to forget about their attachment to that thing more often than not.

"Figures. Fine. I'll bite. I'm just exchanging one form of torture for another at this rate."

As Raynare popped her pill, Jasmine twisted the knob on the door to change it back to the spa so she could relax. She wouldn't get the full treatment until Issei got back, but she could relax in the warm water until then.

"I'm heating the water Vali. You want in?" She asked as she began to strip in front of the pair without any shame. Her full and voluptuous body, complete with wide hips, large breasts, and thin waist was soon on full display without a single article on to hide her privates. Her slightly tanned body was hairless and nearly shining from all the oils and conditioners she perpetually bathed in every day.

The only parts of her sinfully beautiful body that stood out of the ordinary were the small black and red dragon wing tattoo on her ribs just under her right armpit, and the small scar that was in the exact same spot under her left.

"Knock yourself out. Someone's gotta keep guard in case something happens or Asami checks in on us." Vali waved her off with one hand with his cell phone in the other.

A cell phone that was currently aimed at Raynare as she was moving like a hyperactive chipmunk on the stripper pole while a bottle of pills was sitting on the ground nearby.

Vali might hate Issei for a good deal of reasons, but he couldn't deny that he had picked up some useful habits from the erratic Sekiryuutei.

Blackmailing was such an unappreciated field of study these days.

o. o. o.

When Issei appeared at the ORC clubhouse, Rias was half expecting another frustrating afternoon of yelling, mental gymnastics, and uncomfortable revelations.

She, and her peerage for that matter, were not expecting Issei to be fine sitting in the waiting room drinking tea with a toasty, still wrapped in that pleasant atmosphere around him like he was some old man sitting on his porch in the middle of fall.

"Um, Issei? Not to sound unaccommodating, but why are you here? We all thought that you were going to rush back home to Jasmine the second the school bell rang." Rias asked cautiously with the rest of her peerage behind her.

"Just wanted to catch up on your training. Shouldn't take long." Issei sipped his tea peacefully. Honestly, the fact that he was so calm and at ease scared them more than if he was irritable.

"Why didn't you just tell us you were coming ahead of time then?"

He shrugged. "Just felt like it."

The Gremory peerage looked at one another warily, unsure of how to go from there.

"Wow. That Siren's Harmony Sacred Gear must be really powerful if it can calm you down this much." Gasper blinked.

Issei snorted and waved off the compliment. "The opposite Dio. Siren's Harmony is a common trash Sacred Gear in the grand scheme of things. On a lower tier than Twice Critical. Outside of some barely average level hypnotic and hallucinogenic audio based crowd control capabilities, and enabling the users to have borderline perfect singing voices and pitch control, it's not really that notable. Most halfway decent spellcasters of the three factions can do what it does better. No one wants it normally for anything other than cosmetic and performance reasons. Nee-san's is just mutated to be really effective against Dragons."

"It's true." Rias admitted. "There are many copies of Siren's Harmony out in the world, and many users have been identified, but few are ever recruited into peerages or sought out by the other factions. The number of uses it has outside of entertainment is rather limited. As he said, Jasmine Redsmith's is a particular exception to the trend."

"Mmm. That is interesting. I have heard of non-combative Sacred Gears being overlooked before, but I've never really paid much attention to them." Kiba hummed in curiosity. "Do you know of any others?"

"Not many." Issei shrugged. "Inverted Psyche is a mind reading based Gear, but from what I've heard it works with pictures rather than concrete thoughts. Useful for interrogations though. Pandora's Sin's admittedly pretty valued by the factions, but that's because it's a prophesy based Gear. Seeing the future and all that bull, but only calamities and the like. Tends to drive the user insane after a few years once awakened and isn't always accurate depending on how many heavy hitters are around when it's activated. Savant's Mosaic pretty much makes you the ultimate artist and sculptor. Not much use for combat unless you make golems. Pretty sure Michelangelo had that one when he was alive."

"You know quite a few interesting and obscure Sacred Gears." Akeno was impressed by his knowledge.

"You hang out with Azazel for a few years and you learn a few interesting things… and three times as many that make you cringe."

"Do we want to know?"

"The man binges whenever he's in the mood but can't get laid. He says things that are not meant for the faint of heart." Issei was fairly certain that it was that fact that made Vali stay overnight with him and Jasmine at least twice a week during their youth.

"And just when my impression on Fallen could not drop any further." Akeno sighed, not sounding disappointed at all.

"I, did not know that." Rias nodded her head, literally tasting that fact in her mouth and trying to digest it as she moved. "I did not want to know that. But now I do."

"Just another piece to add to the puzzle that is your bullshit. I hope we never finish it. We might summon something that doesn't belong in this world." Koneko stated factually.

"Koneko. Hush." Akeno chided, completely missing Issei nodding in total agreement to Koneko's concerns.

"To the matter at hand, are you certain that this is a good idea?" Kiba got them all back on track.

"I don't follow."

Rias grimaced, not wanting to play this game. "Issei, you do realize that we're all a bit, unsure about how to deal with you after what happened, right? Especially without Jasmine around."

"We're just doing a review Weeb. So long as you lot weren't being lazy, everything should be good." He sipped his tea again and let out a satisfied sigh.

"Holy shit. We need that woman to visit more often." Koneko's eyes were as wide as saucers. "She literally kissed the psycho out of him for an entire day."

The others nodded in agreement simultaneously, unable to trust their voices at the moment.

Issei shifted around and flicked his left hand up. "Dio. Ball."

Almost instantly, Gasper looked up and activated his Sacred Gear on instinct, freezing the tennis ball above Issei's head in place.

Rias' peerage took turns looking surprised at both Issei and Gasper, not expecting the seamless display, nor Gasper's greater proficiency at using Forbidden Balor View.

"Dio. Hold it in place and walk around the room until I say otherwise." Issei didn't bother to look up or acknowledge what had just happened other than giving more instructions.

"R-Right." Gasper was clearly unnerved by the sudden list of commands, but not unused to it as he slowly began to edge around everyone while trying to avoid bumping into anything and keeping the ball up.

"He's improved more than I thought." Akeno stated her surprise as she watched the smallest member of their group follow instructions without complaint or worry. It wasn't his use of powers she was talking about either. Gasper's immediate reaction to Issei's command had also been unexpected. The young dhampir would never have had the confidence to use his powers on the fly like that before.

"Weeb. How's your progress?" Issei broke through their stunned reaction, being the only one not surprised by Gasper's development.

"I…" Rias' gaze lingered on her Bishop for a few more seconds before turning to her unofficial tutor. "Not as much as I'd like, but I have to split my time among my other obligations. I'm starting to get a feel for the process, but my powers tend to fall apart more often than not unfortunately."

"Understandable. Just be careful. Your powers are potent. Try manifesting a ball and examine it in your spare time. Determine what feels like the "outside" and what is the "inside" and work from there. There's no rush."

His instructions were seemingly vague and didn't make much sense to the rest of the peerage, seeing as they didn't know what Rias' training was in the first place.

Rias on the other hand nodded, understanding completely what he was talking about. What caught Issei's eyes was her poorly hidden momentary grimace after he said that there was no rush, but he didn't call her out on that.

"… Yandere, you read those books?"

"Yes. I did." Akeno gave him her patented disarming smile, which she knew full well irritated him.

"What are the three primary factors you should take note of when manipulating electricity?"

"Voltage, current, and frequency."

"And which singular factor should you care about the least when fighting?"

"Voltage."

"And the factor that is most relevant when fighting most opponents?"

"Frequency."

"Which explains why natural lightning doesn't kill everyone it strikes because?"

"Lightning is extremely short in duration, has a low frequency, and doesn't always pass through the heart and brain, limiting the critical damage inside the target's body."

"And when converting magical power into lightning, the bulk of your energy is converted into?"

"Voltage and current."

"How much of each is in naturally occurring lightning?"

"Three hundred million volts and thirty thousand amps."

"In watts?"

"Ten Gigawatts."

"So if you wanted to truly kill someone, you would try to focus the bulk of your power into?"

"Current."

"Because?"

"Forcing higher currents through a body will cause it to go against the body's natural resistance, which induces damage in the form of nerve damage, internal hemorrhaging, burns, seizures, and other reactions. That way, even if my power passes through them, it would still deal immense internal damage."

"But for maximum damage and efficiency you'd still want to focus on?"

"Frequency for near guaranteed nerve damage."

"Name the four types of electrical injuries a person can experience.

"Flash. Fire. Lightning. And True."

"And the cheapest, least power intensive way to kill someone with electricity is?"

Akeno faltered and shifted uncomfortably. "It's, from what I can tell it's interrupting the electrical signals the brain send the heart so it stops beating."

"Right, and wrong." Issei shook his head. "The action of interrupting the signals is next to nothing, but getting raw electricity or magic to dig that deep into a target's body in the middle of a fight and overwhelm their natural defenses and resistances is unfair. It is possible, but you'd need to at least have direct access to their insides. Either through an open wound or with something that's stuck in them like a sword or something."

He lifted up a finger and generated a small ball of magic into it. "The cheapest and easiest way to kill someone with lightning magic from scratch is to generate a concentrated high intensity light right into their eyes. With the right frequency and focus, you can cause severe reaction that'll burn and rupture their internal arteries and cause them to go into shock."

He held up a second finger with a matching ball of magic. "Even if they aren't paralyzed or killed immediately, the bleeding and open wounds the initial attack made will give you a shortcut for a followup attack to easily strike the target's brain so long as you hit some of the blood coming out. Wouldn't take much to take most targets down at that point."

The room was dead quiet.

Issei blinked and looked at his audience confused. "… What?"

"... I know I'm beating a dead horse saying this, but you're fucked up." Koneko spoke what was on everyone's minds.

"In my defense, I learned that trick from a blind asshole… who learned it from his lightning using asshole brother."

"Noted." They didn't know who those people he was talking about were, but if they were bad even by his standards, it was probably best if they didn't learn more about them at all.

"So, how did I do?" Akeno trailed off, not sure where to go from there.

"Depends. How much of that do you think you can actually apply to your magic?"

She avoided eye contact, fully aware that this was likely where the conversation was going to lead. "I, think I should focus on frequency first. I'm not sure how to divide and control the voltage and current of my lightning yet. My attacks come out either in torrents or bursts. Both are rather wild and difficult to control. Just increasing that alone by a small margin should increase its effectiveness extensively."

Issei nodded. "Get a lightbulb and practice flickering it on and off as fast as you can without blowing it out. Humans can feel muscle tetany at around forty hertz. Spasms at bare minimum. Regardless, aim to try and naturally hit around sixty hertz on your own if you can at a bare minimum if you want any decent consistency."

"Right." Akeno nodded, understanding exactly what he was getting at. She didn't expect her training to be so, meticulous, but she couldn't deny the benefits that it could provide her.

Deep down though, she was slightly relieved that he had not taken the easy way out and recommended that she try and train her Fallen Angel powers. She wouldn't use those powers to be strong. She would not rely on that man to forge her future.

"Jailbait."

"Jailprone." Unlike the others, Koneko still had not gotten used to her nickname. She probably never would until he changed it.

"How far into my notes and meditation are you?" He went with her insult in stride.

"Still trying to get a good read on the inner flow of my Ki and inner meridians. It's there, but I can't develop any fine control yet."

"You try doing it after intense activity yet? Sometimes raw workouts don't cut it when it comes to getting your body in the right energy depleted state needed to refine your senses."

"She's done high intensity spars with me three times since we began. No luck yet." Kiba supplied.

"Give it another week. If you still can't get anything I'll have to step in and give you some manual instructions."

"How manual are we talking?" She frowned.

"More manual than you'd probably like, but far less manual than what your sister put me through." He highly doubted that playing with the meridians near his testacles were part of the standard Senjutsu and Ki training process, regardless of how convincing of an argument Kuro made back then.

Then again, he had lost count of the number of times he had groped her during that time, so it probably evened out in the end.

The Gremory Peerage stared at him.

"Do we want to know?" Rias asked skeptically.

"Jailbait. You know Kuro. Where do you think this will go if I start talking?"

"… Please don't talk." Koneko's completion took an interesting shade of white while somehow simultaneously blushing up a storm.

"Can you talk in private?" Akeno asked hopefully.

"Akeno." Rias warned.

"Fine."

"What about me?" Kiba asked with an unreadable tone.

"You deserve to be beaten for that terrible box pun this morning."

"I take it you're not a fan of puns."

Issei twitched and resisted the urge to glare at his wrapped up right arm. "They need to be included in the Geneva Convention as a cruel and unusual punishment."

Three weeks. Three weeks of perpetual puns. He couldn't even escape it when he slept. Sleeping only made it worse when you had an asshole inside your soul.

Issei's left hand twitched even more than he did. Ddraig was clearly of a similar opinion.

"Looks like we found something too horrible for even you." Koneko noted.

"Puns need to burn. With fire. So help me, I will find a way."

"Before you try to start your crusade here, I finished that story you loaded on me." Kiba jumped in before Issei got himself going again.

The distraction was effective. "Huh? Oh. Right. So? You find something to work with?"

The knight shrugged with little effort. "The basics of that projection skill sound useful. It'll make my swords stronger. Might be able to make a spell that'll help me identify the powers of enemy swords too."

"And?"

"And what? That's all that I saw that I thought were relevant." Kiba brushed him off. "All those other weapons looked useful, but their powers are too over the top for me to replicate. The plot was all over the place, the magic system was overall too complicated and erratic to be replicable by me other than a few examples, and the characters were emotionally unstable wrecks. Overall my time was better spent training."

For once, Issei didn't seem pleased by the report, and looked at the swordsman with disappointment. "You're a terrible man slave. I had many assumptions about you, but I didn't think you were lazy."

Kiba's fake smile vanished instantly. "Excuse you?"

"You probably just rushed through the story and barely skimmed what was going on. Out of everyone here, your power is the most versatile and useful for training. Unfortunately, you're too shut off in your own preconceptions to be of any use other than some grunt with a stick."

The next anyone knew, Kiba was standing next to Issei with a sword held up to the teen's neck. "Be very careful what you say next, or else you'll know intimately what I can do with this stick."

"Kiba!" Rias shouted in alarm.

"Sempai!" Gasper couldn't help himself and took his eyes off of the ball, letting it drop on Issei's head.

"Congrats. You can swing a stick." Issei conversely, wasn't in the slightest. "Can you swing a fire stick?"

The swordsman frowned. "What the hell are you…?"

"An ice stick? A lightning stick? An invisible stick?" Issei's eyes developed a sharp gleam to it. "A corrosive stick? A poison stick? A sentient stick?"

"I can make whatever sword I want so long as it's not overkill. I told you that already. Stop trying to play-"

"A stick that can increase your speed?" Issei cut him off, his tone harder still. "A stick that can make you stronger? A stick that can make you smarter? A stick that can make you learn faster? Grow faster? Heal faster?"

Kiba froze. As did everyone else.

"Can you give your sticks to others? Can you make it so that your sticks will work for them too?"

"… Did, did he just come up with a shortcut for our training?" Koneko couldn't believe what she was hearing.

Issei lifted up his free hand, pinched the sword against his neck with his index and thumb, and shattered it with minimal effort. "That game was supposed to open your mind to trying to use your powers with more versatility. Both in and out of combat. More than just the elementary school dumpster baby logic of "hur dur water beats fire cuz water cold" that you've been so embarrassingly proud of using. The same way I used my powers to accelerate my development."

"You hacked your growth rate?! An exp magnifier?!" Gasper connected the dots faster than the others, probably because he was the most familiar with Issei's terminology. "If you started while you were young and trained constantly, it's no wonder you're so ridiculously strong now despite being a human!"

"I didn't get like this naturally." The Sekiryuutei stated bluntly. "Anyone that thinks that cheaters never win is an idiot. Hard work by itself is useless. Sacred Gears and Magic are supposed to be the ultimate tools for cheating. The real winners of the world are the hard working natural born monsters raised in the right conditions, and the hard working cheaters that always look for ways to break the system in their favor."

"He could make us swords to magnify the speed of our training. Even if it's by a small margin, if each of us has one, the cumulative time saved would be…" Rias' mind was moving a mild a minute as she went over the ramifications of this revelation. "Kiba. Could you do it?"

"I…" The previously offending swordsman was caught off guard by being put on the spot like this. So much so that he had momentarily forgotten about Issei. Truth be told, the look that his King was giving him was somewhat unnerving. "I'm not sure. Maybe? I have to test it out, but even if it works, it might not be that effective…"

"Dio. Standard level and skill grinding question. How valuable is a ten percent exp magnifier in an exceptionally long lasting game that takes months if not years of gameplay?"

"Priceless. Especially if you don't want to cripple yourself with min maxing." Gasper replied instantly, knowing what Issei was getting at. "More so if magnifiers are hard to come by and the grinding is long term. Doing anything that takes a hundred hours in ninety is always worth it. More so if the source isn't a limited consumable or with drawbacks."

"Welp. There you go. My works done for the day." Issei finished his tea and stood up to leave.

"I, Issei you can't just leave after dropping something like that on us." Rias rubbed her temple to push back another growing headache. It was always like this when he was around.

"Why? Everyone pretty much knows what to work on now. I thought it was pretty self-explanatory."

"What about Kiba?"

"What about him? I have better things to do than waste time on someone that won't take me seriously and try to play stupid behind a fake smile that only a retard would buy. Even Yandere doesn't brush me off and pretend that she knows better when asking for advice."

"Please don't involve me in this particular topic." Akeno requested politely from the side with a slight tone that she really did not want to be part of this growing fiasco.

"Noted." Issei just as politely nodded and adhered to her request.

"Issei. Don't think we haven't noticed how much you distrust him. You aren't exactly subtle." Rias stood her ground. To her side, the other members showed signs of varying degrees of siding with her on the statement.

"And? Didn't stop me from trying to help him. I just don't want someone like that near me." The accused didn't try to deny it in the slightest.

"I find that quite hypocritical coming from you." Kiba stepped forward. "You hate everyone immensely and perpetually stir up a fit whenever things go your way."

"I distrust everyone. There are only a very select handful of individuals that I bother to put in an effort to actually hate, and I assure you they have all earned it with a glowing distinction." Issei corrected with disinterest, albeit with a momentary flare in his eyes.

"What did they do?" Kiba prodded before Rias could cut him off.

"They made me the person I am today." It was the firm finality in his tone that made the swordsman falter in his defiance.

"That would do it." Koneko muttered. It was as close to a confirmation that Issei was in fact frustrated with himself as much as everyone else was.

"While I am unstable and eccentric to a very literal crippling fault, I at least don't use it as an excuse to intentionally perform poor results when asked to do something simply because I am simply dissatisfied with it. I may only represent myself, but I at least have standards. You on the other hand, have clearly shown how dedicated you are to those you stand by."

Kokeno, Akeno, and Gasper grimaced at the vicious insinuation made. Worse still was that Issei had made it without any of his usual shouting, swearing, or vulgar accusations.

"You…" Kiba took a step forward, another sword already in hand.

"Kiba!" Rias snapped, standing in between the two. "Issei. Please leave. If you can't be civil with Kiba, then we will have to find some other way to do this."

Issei however, didn't look away from the swordsman. "… Do you want to know something interesting, little slave?"

"Whatever it is, don't bother. I've had enough of your useless rambling. Leave." Kiba snarled, unsure if he'd be able to hold himself back if Issei insulted his dignity any more than he already has.

Issei blinked and looked down at Kiba, as if weighing the request.

And then he did something that no one there expected.

His eyes almost closed and upturned.

His face relaxed.

And his lips went up.

Issei smiled.

It was something nearly identical to what Kiba donned nearly every day.

Only it was more.

It was wrong. Ethically. Fundamentally. Conceptually. WRONG.

Without uttering a word, Issei had exposed them all to a lie beyond lies.

"I only wanted to tell you that I know how to smile (̴̡̥͓̭̭̆ľ̴̻͍̯̪̭͝i̵̡̛̙̬̮̪̖̍̀̚ĕ̴̯͕̰̻̘̩̈̽)̵͇̞̥͔̜̄͝ too. See?"

o. o. o.

Rias let out a deep sigh of genuine exhaustion as she sat down in her office chair.

"Well, that certainly didn't turn out as well as we had hoped." Akeno tried to brighten the mood, but even she couldn't muster up the energy to put any effort into it.

"I should have known something was going to happen when he showed up without any prodding today." Rias shook her head.

"To be fair, he was almost pleasant until he got to Kiba." Akeno factually tried to assuage her King's lamentation.

"I'm surprised you aren't being harsher. Issei is usually as vicious on you as he is on Kiba."

The Queen shifted slightly. "True, but I suppose I am just better with rolling with the punches than Kiba is, and as a consequence we have developed a minor tolerance for one another because of it."

A small scoff left her lips. Rias already knew that. She understood Issei enough to know that he was the sort of person that hated dealing with people that didn't listen or bother to try and figure out what he was actually saying and doing. While Akeno and Kiba had the same starting point, Akeno had actually put in some effort into understanding and accepting what Issei was trying to do to help her.

Kiba on the other hand, didn't. Granted, Issei didn't know of Kiba's past and underestimated the latter's hatred of sacred swords, but that still didn't excuse Kiba's lackluster effort. Especially after it was abundantly clear that Issei's training methods worked. For everyone.

Trying to wield one's pride when up against a Dragon was pointless. The only result that could come from that were burns.

Issei respected those that could see past his bullshit and comprehend the methods behind his madness. He disliked people that couldn't think for themselves and clearly loathed those with closed off minds and were ruled by their emotions. And liars.

She suppressed a shiver as his final moments before leaving replayed in her mind. It was all but abundantly clear that he considered himself a part of the latter group.

"Well, regardless of what progress we might have made, we've lost it now." Rias shook her head. "One step forward, and three steps back."

"It really is frustrating." Akeno agreed. "And after he managed to recover so quickly with Jasmine-san here."

"Yes, I know ex-" Rias began to concur before her mind came to a screeching halt as a single nagging thought snared onto her Queen's statement and wrenched her mind in another direction.

The second it did so, several pieces suddenly cascaded and fell into place so rapidly she was genuinely glad she was in her chair, lest she actually stumble from the revelation.

"Rias?"

"… That cunning little monster."

"I'm not sure I follow."

Rias let out a bitter laugh and sunk into her seat. "He played us. Issei hasn't gotten better in the slightest."

"I, can you please elaborate?" Akeno frowned, now clearly worried as to what was going on.

"Akeno. Not even a week ago, his mother and Asia were nearly murdered and kidnapped, and he had a psychological breakdown that, according to everyone that actually knows what's going on, would have likely killed us all had it been any worse. We managed to calm him down, and the surprise visit from Ms. Redstone may have tempered the worst of it, but he was clearly affected by what happened. Damage was done."

Rias rested a hand on her face. Issei had been a hikikomori for the past five years. A shut in. A recluse. Absolutely adverse to directly interacting or connecting with other people. She and the other Devils had made progress over the past month, but she knew for a fact that damage that deep didn't simply heal or go away that quickly. Not even heal. Issei had likely regressed because of what had happened.

She went on. "He came here to talk about our training on his own prerogative, but that was just his excuse to open things up to pour oil on a fire, any fire we have in order to kick him out and increase distance between us in the heat of the moment. If not Kiba, he probably would have found an excuse to prod any one of us to get the same result as tonight."

"Then why not go after him now?"

"We can't. We just kicked him out on our own violation, just like he planned. He has no reason to come back or listen to us so soon. Even if we didn't catch on so quick, we don't have reason to go after him again because we'd be too absorbed into all the, quite frankly, life changing training method he's given us. With that trick involving Kiba's swords accelerating our progress, it wouldn't be too hard to expect us to be completely absorbed in our training as much as possible to get as much out of it as we can. He gave us the perfect tool to distract and occupy our time with."

"Do you think he knows about your situation with Riser?" Akeno frowned in concern. The Phoenix family had been extremely tiring to deal with as of late regarding Rias' engagement.

"If he doesn't, then he likely suspects something's going on." She sunk into her seat in defeat. "It's abundantly clear that he's sharper than he lets on."

"He satisfied our requests beyond our expectations and fulfilled his own goal simultaneously while playing the annoyance that everyone wants to be rid of, so much so that we actually did send him home. And we were none the wiser." Akeno shook her head. "He truly is a vexing child."

"And it's not like we can simply call him out on it. Not after what just transpired. In order to do that and mend any bridges we have, we'd need to address Kiba's issues to some extent, otherwise we'd just have a repeat performance sometime in the future."

Akeno was just as pleased with that idea as she was. "He, truly doesn't care if he comes out looking like the bad guy, does he?"

Rias replied with a bitter smile. "We still don't know his full story, but we know enough to fill in some blanks. He probably does care, but I'm genuinely afraid he's been put in that position for so long that it's the only role he knows how to play well now."

"Then what can we do?"

"… For now, probably nothing. Not directly at least." Rias turned to look outside. "Jasmine is still here. Stirring anything up while she's around will probably cause trouble. I'll talk to Asami and Jasmine to let them know of what he did, but for now let's just play to his expectations. Don't seek him out unless you have a question regarding training, and even then do it only at least after a few days. Engage him on related topics. He likes it when people give his input value. When they trust what he says."

"When they aren't accusing him of lying." Akeno supplied.

"Yeah. Lying." Rias trailed off before looking at her queen. "Akneo…"

"Don't." She was cut off. "Not because I don't want to talk about it, but… I'm not sure myself what to say on the matter. I'll need time to think on it."

"Of course. Take as much as you need. And, how is Kiba?"

"He's… processing what has transpired. We all know that while he does behave himself most of the time, Kiba sometimes has as much difficulty dealing with his emotions as Issei."

"Everyone but him." Rias corrected. She was not blind to her Knight's disposition. "Although that may be up for debate now."

"Ever since Issei left, Kiba has either been busy practicing with his sword or making those experience amplifying weapons Issei told him about earlier. He completely ignored me when I called him for dinner."

"Leave him be. You know how difficult he gets when his pride is hit that hard. After that snipe about being lazy and his dedication to his comrades, I'm afraid that Kiba won't be receptive to any form of comforting or support until he accomplishes at least this task. If we try any earlier he would only interpret it as us having no faith that he'd be able to help us."

"Boys." Akeno huffed. "And they complain that we're the frustrating ones."

"Well they do keep things interesting." Rias allowed herself to smile in mild amusement. "I'll warn Sona about what's happened so that Issei doesn't try to pull the same stunt with her. Otherwise, it'll be best if we just play along with what he wants for now. The extra training without any yelling would be nice too. As it currently stands though, you and Koneko have the best reasons to seek him out if you're still having trouble with your training. I'm certain he wouldn't mind it too much if you approached him about it later this week."

"He is more tolerable whenever he's focused on teaching, so long as nothing sets him off." The Priestess agreed, already going over her prior interactions with him. "I'll give it a few days before chatting him up again for some ideas. I'll let Koneko know."

"Thanks." Rias sighed and leaned back in her chair. Absently she lifted up a hand in front of her face, and closed her fingers until only her index was still out.

A familiar red and black ball of power hovered over her finger. A small sample of power that she had known and grown up with. It was something that she had always assumed she knew better than anyone save for the rest of her family.

Compress the outside in, and pull the inside out.

Feel the difference between the core and the shell.

She frowned as the ball above her finger flickered and twitched erratically. It was undergoing a change. She could feel it, but the process was clearly unstable and inconsistent.

Within moments, the ball exploded with an audible pop, making her hiss in mild irritation as the tip of her finger was singed.

"Looks like I'm not the only one that could go for extra lessons." Akeno smirked. "Teacher and student, staying after hours in an abandoned school building for a sinful relationship…"

"As tempting as that sounds, we both know that Issei would turn that fantasy into a frustrating nightmare if we even tried to start that off." Rias shook her head with a laugh. "No, it would be best if I held off from seeing him for the time being. I'm the one that sent him away after all. If I don't show at least some spine now, he'll just keep on trying to walk all over me later. At the very least, I want to see if Kiba's potential development can truly help us out as much as Gasper claims."

"It does sound too good to be true." Akeno hummed. "But then that begs the question…"

"What Sacred Gear would enable Issei to accelerate his growth to such an extent that even my brother is wary of him?" Rias nodded.

"You have some ideas already no doubt."

"A few suspicions, but several are unlikely, and the others…"

"Would raise only more uncomfortable questions." Akeno immediately got the picture. "I'll leave the matter be then."

"Thanks." She looked at a nearby clock. "It's getting close to time for people to start summoning us for contracts."

"I'll let the others know." The Queen bowed and made to leave the room. "Be patient Rias. You managed to worm your way into all of our hearts eventually. Issei will be no different."

Turning to look out her window, Rias couldn't help but sigh in defeat. She had screwed up, assuming that the recent matter with their resident headache had been addressed so cleanly, and now they were all nearly back to square one again.

She should have seen this coming. It wouldn't be the first time someone under her supervision had an emotional breakdown and regressed into old self destructive habits.

"It would all be so much easier if he accepted being a member of my peerage." Her whimsical wish was one that she knew would never happen. Issei was too powerful for her to manage, and his history all but guaranteed that he would kill anyone that tried to force themselves on him again.

She shivered as she remembered that twisted abomination that was his smile flickered in her memories. That display alone had caused everyone to do nothing as he walked out of her clubhouse without a single protest. It had been enough that she had not seen Kiba or Akeno themselves don their forged smiles since, even when assuring her that they were fine.

Maybe that was what her Queen and Knight needed. To see someone that was blatantly like them but worse, and be called out by that person. To see just how unsettling they were in a mirror.

Rias shook her head. No. Regardless of what they needed and didn't, there was no point in dwelling on it now. Pushing the matter would only devolve the situation. Best to leave things be and see where it all goes.

Her eyes trailed to the growing stacks of paperwork on her desk. She was not done with the documentation spawned from Issei's outburst and the aftereffects on Kuoh. Even if he didn't directly kill anyone that hadn't gone after him, Issei's raw intent had done damages. Shocked civilians. Heart attacks. Seizures. Broken windows. It was a mess that she and Sona had taken turns addressing whenever they could.

She allowed herself to lean back and rest.

A Dragon type Sacred Gear that could magnify the user's development and growth. A master of fire magic. An owner that experienced severe psychological trauma five years ago, one that held enough influence and potential to have the support and attention of the Maou, Azazel, and Michael.

… She really hoped that Issei wasn't who she suspected he was, but she also expected that Sona had already come to the same conclusion that she did.

No. Even if that was the case, it was abundantly clear that there was something else going on. Something that they were better off not getting involved in for as long as possible.

o. o. o.

"I. Would. Like. To. Eat. Please. Mother."

"Holy shit." Jasmine blinked owlishly next to Asami as they sat in front of Asia as the latter practiced Japanese. "She's fucking adorable."

"I know. Right?" Asami cooed with misty eyes and drooling a small bit.

"Have they been like this all day?" Issei looked at a slightly twitchy Vali.

"They've been like this all weekend whenever you're not around. You've just been too busy being a puddle of spam in Jas' hands to notice."

"Figures." The Sekiryuutei looked at the disturbed Hakuryuutei. "From the way you're bugging out I'm guessing…"

"What. Are you. Doing?" The two teens practically jumped to the ceiling in alarm as Asia once again somehow bypassed their innate senses and appeared in front of them innocently with a harmless question.

"How the fuck does she keep doing that?!" Vali shouted with some hysteria.

"I don't know!" Issei replied, just as freaked out. "Fucking Ninja Puppy!"

o. o. o.

Omake:

Rias looked at the bill she had recently gotten in the mail.

"Akeno?"

"Yes?"

"Why have we recently been delivered a hundred pack of extra-large cardboard boxes?"

"It's for Gasper. You know how he gets if he doesn't have one on hand."

"If that's the case, then why was there an equally large delivery of baby oil made at the same time?"

"… Kiba likes to polish his swords?"

"With baby oil?"

"He's testing new oils?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Please tell me you're at least not planning on kidnapping anyone."

"I haven't reached that part of the- I mean of course not."

"Akeno."

"You know I get summoned by weird people! They might like it for all you know!"