40

Chapter 40: Conversing with madnessNotes:

First I had to go to a prom, the a second one, then I had to pack and unpack our camping equipment and go hiking...

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EDIT: 15.000 Hits!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Chapter 40

Tanya had not expected to find one half of the mansion encased in ice. Spikes, more than twenty metres long were bursting through the walls and roof and a thin blanket of snow laid on the surrounding area.

Another, thankfully smaller part of the building seemed to be on fire if the smoke was anything to go by and many of the windows in the lower floors were destroyed. The signs of an attack on a comparatively massive scale were so obvious that even a Russi general couldn´t have missed it.

Waiting in front of the slowly crumbling manor stood a lanky, green figure surrounded by familiarly dressed cultists. Based on his different attire and his central position she assumed him to be higher up in the hierarchy. Even though he was a maddened terrorist the fact that he represented some kind of authority should give him more brain capacity than his drone-like underlings. So maybe he wouldn´t immediately attack on sight? It was worth a shot at least.

Soon an identical illusion of her floated over to the edge of the forest and hovered in the air above them while she hid inside a nearby tree. The less distance between her and the illusion the more convincing her trick would be. But she didn't want to be directly in the line of fire should the cultists possess a super weapon of some kind.

"Greetings. I have come with peaceful intentions."

Her optical clone opened her arms in a non-threatening manner.

The green man spun around and showed his sickly pale face to her. His eyes were bloodshot and bulged out of his skull while his skin stretched too tight over his skull. For some reason he visibly sniffed the air and broke out into uncomfortable laughter.

"What is this? Could it be? Could it be? A fellow believer in love! Are you the one who was awaited? Hmm?"

The madman was talking and although his words should not be trusted on account of his clearly dysfunctional mental state, it was still a brilliant opportunity to fish for more information. These people were hardly the whole witch´s cult after all. Wherever the other members hid themselves she needed more intel to combat them in the future.

Denying his ramblings could anger him which would terminate the conversation, but pretending to be whoever "the one who was awaited" was could end equally as bad. Just dodging the question should work fine though.

"Perhaps. Awaited by whom, should be the question. You have not yet introduced yourself."

"Of course! How could I be so forgetful, so lacking, so slothful!"

He began to punch himself so hard that she could hear bones break. Suddenly he stopped his self-mutilation and stood ramrod straight only to sink into a bow so deep that it couldn't be healthy for his spine. His minions followed suit in perfect unison as if they were lifeless puppets strung along which strengthened the theory of them being mindless.

"I am the sin archbishop representing sloth, Petelgeuse Romanee-Conti – DESU!*"

Disgusting. If there were any doubts that she was speaking with a madman then they were now out of the window. That crazed gleam in his eyes as he screamed his own name couldn´t be faked. A maddened fire burned in them that she remembered all too well from her encounters with Mary Sioux.

"And what, if I may ask, are you doing here in my domain? I have a special interest in this place you see."

What would he want from Emilia or Roswaal? That was the crux of the matter.

"Ah, my love sent me here! It is the will of the witch that we have met today! Can you not feel it? It was destined to be this way!"

What a fool. Humans made their own destiny. By entrusting his fate to the jealous witch he robbed himself of control and evaded responsibility for his actions. That made him not only coward but also an idiot.

Nonetheless she would need to fish deeper after that non-answer of his.

"Mmmhhh" she raised her hand to her chin as if deep in thought. "Could it be that we are indeed here because of the same thing?

"Yes! It must be! The ordeal will commence! Now tell me, are you perhaps pride? The seat has been vacant for some time you see and the scent of love clings to you as thickly as it only would to a sin archbishop!"

Was he insinuating that she had the potential to become a sin archbishop? How dare he! As if she would ever join such a retarded club of lunatics! Especially as the representative of the sin of pride! When did she ever indulge in prideful acts?

Yes, she had pride in being a mature human being with a sense of independence and self-worth, but everybody healthy should treat themselves with dignity like that. All of her decisions in her past two lives had been aimed at being of optimal service to her employers or the population at large. Never had she tried to acquire power simply for becoming more powerful or because she deluded herself into thinking that she was the best possible ruler! She had always just been the least terrible alternative!

How dare he call her prideful after everything she had sacrificed!

Tanya calmed herself by remembering that Petelgeuse was a madman after all. His words were as nonsensical as they were confusing. Still, it would not be good to underestimate his intellect or ruthlessness. He had become a leader figure among a group of people who were undoubtedly as deranged as him or else they wouldn't have accepted him as the one in charge.

"What do you know about the ordeal? I am not sure what exactly you mean by that? You would share your knowledge of love with me would you?"

She desperately hoped that she had sounded like one of his cult members even though she had no clue what "love" he was talking about. He had mentioned it multiple times so it had to be important.

"You don't know! YOU DON´T KNOW! How indolent, how ignorant, how SLOTHFUL!"

For a moment Tanya feared that she had wasted her opportunity and would have to kill him before he had depleted his usefulness, but he suddenly seized his angered flailing.

With a strangely empty expression he began to sway from side to side until he threw his hands into the air and deceptively softly proclaimed: "But I will be forgiving of your misdeeds this once! The great witch loves us all after all. Yes, you shall be enlightened by her divine intellect so that you may marvel at how genius the plan is that she has laid out for us."

His mood swings were so irritating! How anyone would want to work under a boss like him was beyond her.

"The ordeal is a sacred ritual to decide the worth Satella´s next vessel! Only a Halfling of elven descent could be the carrier of her glorious form, so I have been diligently seeking them out wherever I can find them and subjected them to her judgement. If the girl in these walls survives then that proves that she is the chosen one. If not then she was obviously a disgusting, worthless, wicked impostor! Can you see it? The simple brilliance of the ordeal?"

Really that was the plan? Throw everything he could at Emilia to kill her and see if she survives in spite of it? Well, to be honest it kind of reminded her of her own days training her battalion with sustained artillery bombardment and daylong treks through ice and snow. But in her defence, back then she had been closely watching them to ensure that nobody died and she had needed a lot of capable soldiers quickly to shield her from enemy bullets!

Her recruits had received a proper education beforehand and been repeatedly warned of the dangers that they were about to face. None of them had been surprised; or at least they shouldn´t have been!

This man was just wasting the lives of most likely civilians who were in no way, shape or form expecting a surprise attack from dozens of highly capable fighters! At the same time mind you! Even a veteran of her calibre would struggle against that, as worrying as the thought was. This moronic "ordeal" proved absolutely nothing other than civilians were not capable of defeating an overwhelming ambush!

Not to mention, what if he succeeded? What if Satella really received a new body? Wouldn´t she just destroy the other half of the world? The same world that this idiot was unfortunately living on? The jealous witch would kill him too!

At least his delusional screeching had indirectly confirmed that Emilia was still alive. Probably.

"What a sophisticated plan! Truly, you have been blessed by her that she would share something so refined with you."

"Yes, yes, yes! You understand! Will you now come down to watch as we..."

She had no time to squander with his pointless rambling. Her business partner was in imminent danger.

"No." she said before an enhanced bullet ripped through his skull, leaving a small, red crater in the lawn behind him. It might have been overkill, but she wouldn´t want to risk it. For good measure she squeezed off a second shot straight through his heart which finally toppled the near headless corpse over.

"Eight bullets in the magazine left." her subconscious pointed helpfully out.

As she evaded the various fire, ice, earth and air projectiles from the cultists below she wished she had taken her rifle with her. Hopefully her explosive formulas wouldn´t overload the small barrel of her sidearm.

Four average explosions later and her gun was indeed slightly glowing at the very tip. On the plus the side, the ground was now largely cultist (and grass) free. Reinforcements would soon arrive so she would need to make haste. With some luck the other terrorists in the mansion would come to check on their leader and she would have enough time to extract Emilia and possibly the maid before she met up with Rem´s carriage and retreated to the capital. Roswaal should sort out the rest of this mess.

Explosions indoors wouldn't do her any good though so she holstered her pistol (vainly hoping that the hot metal wouldn't burn the leather) and drew both her cutlass and her knife. Melee was not her speciality, but she was optimistic that her talent would suffice. More power went to her shield to counteract any ambushes in the enclosed spaces and she was ready to go. Exactly fifteen seconds after she had eliminated Petelgueuse she sped up and smashed through the nearest window.

Where was that damned half-elf hiding?

Note: *= Desu means apparently "I am" or something similar. I had to look it up, because I never understood that part of his introduction. 

Notes:

Check out my new fic "Paid in Blood" (yeah I´m sorry)! It´s a Bloodborne x Youjo Senki crossover, because as far as I could find nobody (with 1 exception) has done that before! Feel free to leave your ideas and wishes for that story in the comments.

(I have literally 0 self-control so I had to write it now!)

You can find it in the link below :)