X25: Non intuitive repairs

Svenn… is alive, Kazuki thought. He's alive. Back and kicking again. But worst of all: a Loyalist. His mind formulated a simulation as it ached. He didn't hear everything, but he understood what his mind told him. It was reminding him of Svenn. That night when Kazuki was on the brink of just ending his eternal contract… Svenn stopped him.

Blinking, a blank white room filled his view. Mountains and mountains of armoured corpses filled it on all sides, surrounding a black throne - his throne. Blood dripped from it. Their gazes were all placed upon him. This again? Well, it's been a short minute since he's been here… the pile always gets bigger. Even without identifying dog-tags, he could tell them all apart. From body features to the smallest subtleties.

He's selfish, greedy even. All these sacrifices for his own gain. For his own company, for his own dreams - dreams covered with dust. "So, what do you all think?" asked Kazuki, "All your sacrifices led to this." No one answered back, he knows their responses already. Petra was amongst the dead, her face just as torn as when Quinn and he found her.

Pathetic, Kazuki thought. No matter what, he'll remember their faces. Their stories, their dreams are all lost - lost to all but him. He still wore his armour, with gold accent colouring to the trims. 

Guilt started to weigh down on him. He failed once. He can't fail again. Because there's no going back, all errors are lethal… 

He felt a shadow behind him. 

He twisted around, seeing Victoria Celeste-Delmara staring at him with soulless, crimson eyes. The cut on her neck was still visible, blood still dripping out as he remembered. It stained her already blood-red dress, her side braid drooping over her shoulder. She looked as old as her twin sister, the memories of the two people merging together; if it wasn't for the blood and the cut, he probably could have thought her real - even if it's just a figment of his mind. She was still as beautiful as her twin, lifelessly at him. But Kazuki did not admire it. He forbade himself. 

The Contract-Breaker shall get no respite; the monster must not, he thought… That's right: he's a monster; someone that killed thousands by hand; someone that murdered all that tried to protect him; someone that broke his contract and uprooted the whole industry; and someone who won. He was an abomination of cybernetics in flesh, nothing more. Nothing less.

"Remember," gargled Victoria, her voice both clear and unclear. "Why you still fight?"

Why… must he be cursed with his father's gifts? Kazuki asked himself, watching the corpse place a bloodied hand on his cheek. "Yes."

'—here.' Kazuki's mind snapped awake as a voice crashed in from his uplink and ICAPAD. He touched his cheek - it was cold. He was in his office. It was barebone, he never spent much time here anyways. 

Looking down at his chest, he could feel the mechanical cogs in his organs tick on. He pressed on his uplink, his mind numb. He looked behind him, the opened up Analyspec connecting him to simulations of his past, with its monstrous steel arms. He hated it, but it was necessary to fully utilise his brain capacity. He slid it shut with his uplink. The time for thinking was over.

"Dammit… Focus," said Kazuki, slamming his hand against his head. He shouldn't have lost focus on the analyspec… He could feel its lingering effects in his mind as he felt his brain ache… His eyes dithered; and looking down at his chair, he swore he sat on a throne - a throne of black blood… A moment passed, and it faded.

'Come in.' said Kazuki, popping a Halolazil pill into his mouth to calm himself down. He took one glance at his aug-glasses, instinctively reaching out for them, but he stopped. No need for them, no threats present.

With that, the door opened. Eliza entered. She looked tired as always, with dark rings around her eyes. But she's always had those, and they didn't take away from her looks - but he does wonder what she'd look like without them. Cyrus, his private guard, nodded at him as the door closed behind her. Stillness was in the air as Eliza gave an awkward wave at him. "Hey."

"Good evening… morning?" Kazuki trailed off, trying to formulate a greeting. But his mind bled sweat at the sight of her… What he knows he can never tell her, even if it's what she wanted to know. 

Eliza glanced at him, her eyes scanning his face. "You look quite tired, I could come by later if you wish. And your hair's even more of a mess…" she said, pointing at the top of her own head.

Kazuki slapped himself across the face. "I'll be fine," he said. He grabbed hold of his hair, finding and grabbing an extended piece of his hair that jutted out. 

"Really? I mean, you still have bed hair…"

"This isn't bed hair, we all have it," Kazuki stated. "If you ever see someone from Trasian Space, they'll have it…" His face remained the same, but his voice held a minute of frustration.

"Oh… SO THAT'S WHY YOU ALL HAVE THAT!" Eliza leaned closer, analysing his extended cowlick. He let her continue, no point in denying the fact that it exists. "I just realised… yeah… that actually makes sense!" 

"It's one of those things that you don't recognise until it's called out," Kazuki said. "But… sorry for making you do this."

He stood up, shifting a small holo-book called 'A billion ways to say fuck' to the side. He dragged his hover-chair around the desk, placing it beside another chair as she sat down on it.

"Oh please, I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't want to." She looked up at him. She was always the most empathetic of the group, he thought. Even if she doesn't show it, she's far too compassionate to survive on the field. "Don't worry, I won't be poking around, it'll be poking around and finding out!"

"Ah. My confidence in this has skyrocketed." snapped Kazuki, sitting down. He wore casual clothes. His armoured garments and plates were neatly sealed in an energy locker on the wall, black ops colouring with gold accents. "You'll have ten minutes after it's taken out."

"I'll get it done in five." said Eliza, confident in her own abilities. She placed the datapads on the desk as it popped up all of the guides for exospine maintenance that she had personally made. Her dedication was commendable, he thought.

Eliza took out a small tool case from her pocket, taking out numerous devices as she shimmied the chair over towards Kazuki's back. She pulled down on the back of his shirt, giving her a better view of the exospine's many components and bones.

"Oh… and thanks for letting me and Archius stay with you for a bit." said Kazuki, "I doubt my parents would take me in."

"Ah," Eliza started, "Please, pay it no mind, Kaz, it feels nice to have people to, well, hang out with. Anyhow, are you ready?"

Kazuki nodded. 

He wasn't all too much in the mood for talking. With everything he had been simulating, he didn't want to see Eliza eye to eye. She reminded him too much of Victoria and his failings. With a gentle yank, Eliza took Kazuki's energy source out from his nape. He could feel a sting dig deep as the power saving modules activated.

She started to poke around the interior of the battery converter. It's the root of all problems with him. He did his best to not… chuckle as he felt it slightly tickle him. He didn't want to hear himself 'chuckle'.

"So… uh… sorry." said Eliza, he guessed that she would try to make small talk - but was surprised at an apology. 

"If it's the mission, don't worry." said Kazuki, "They'll warm up. Just stay focused and do your job, they like competence. Be competent."

Eliza took out one of the small converters in his internal heat regulators. He felt slightly embarrassed. Why… was he feeling embarrassed? Must be the lack of energy, he thought. He always was more carefree when he went into power saving mode, it was probably why he was so weird with Yuki. Even so, his face didn't change a single shade.

"No, Yes… it's about, well, my outburst. I feel like I was being distracting…"

"You weren't. I could freely think and concentrate on the mission." stated Kazuki.

"Huh?!" Eliza stopped in her tracks, expecting something else entirely. Kazuki remained still. "I… wasn't too distracting… right?"

"No." said Kazuki, "I couldn't get your damn voice out of my head. Literally."

Then, something vibrated in Kazuki's pocket. He glanced down towards his right pocket, shoving his hand into it and pulling his holo-phone out. The projector slab vibrated along with the phoenix key-chain on it. But as it vibrated, it fell out of his hand, smacking onto the floor and activating.

"Huh?" Eliza looked down at it, picking it up before Kazuki could. Kazuki twisted his head to her as much as possible. "Oh…"

"What is it?" Kazuki asked, still feeling her left hand on his shoulder. 

Eliza's face was blank. She stared directly at the holographic projection with an envious look. Her grip tightened as Kazuki felt the squeeze. She looked at him, her jealous face contrasting his air-headed stare. Kazuki tilted his head in confusion at her.

"Uh…"

"Kaz… who's this Yuki person?" asked Eliza, showing Kazuki a message: 'Hey Kazu, I need help with something on Lowguard' then followed by a thousand emojis, some of them being hearts.

Kazuki gave her a blank look, then took back his phone, sliding it into his pockets. "Yuki's my sister."

Eliza's face calmed as Kazuki remained confused. Was something wrong with Yuki? He couldn't tell… But he never could tell either way. She had a satisfied look on her face. At the same time, the phone rang off a dozen more times.

"Umm…" Eliza trailed off.

"Just ignore it. It does that sometimes." said Kazuki, "Just wait until she shuts up, should take her… thirty minutes or so. Depends on her free-time."

"Thirty minutes?! It's probably important, then! I mean, it's your sister…"

"She probably just wanted me to help her beat some guy up." said Kazuki, "Lowguard is a perma-death game and she's fucking awful at it. Absolutely zero game sense. No skill. Can't dodge. Can't parry. Bluntly, she has a skill issue."

"Ah… I see…" Eliza readjusted her round-glasses as they shot out an augmented overlay for Kazuki's exospine. Did he hit a nerve? Kazuki couldn't tell… "If I ever get into lowguard, would you help me?"

"Huh?" Kazuki glanced back at her. "No. You'll get too competitive again and try to claim my position as number one."

She slid around to face him. He gave her a blank, air-headed look. As she looked at him, she pouted in frustration. She started to grumble at his lack of comforting words as she rolled backwards. 

"I'm surprised she still messages me," said Kazuki, out of the blue. Eliza paused for a moment. He didn't bother looking at her.

Eliza said, "Family problems?" 

"I guess."

"Ah, well, speaking as an ex-younger sister, she'd probably be less interested in problems."

Kazuki grumbled under his breath. "She's annoying," he said. "But I prefer annoying over my parents."

Eliza paused, her mind probably in a state of realisation. She must at least understand to some extent. "You don't normally talk about your parents, even back in school or uni… Did something happen?"

Kazuki could hear her refix and restart her aug-glasses lens. 

"No. Nothing changed. I'm still a GemRy, and alive - much to their distaste."

"Kaz!" Eliza raised her voice. "I'm sure your parents wouldn't want you dead!"

He slowly shook his head, his eyes slowly closing as months of exhaustion were laying into him. "I'm the Fourth of the Seven Mercs and a GemRy, a noble. If they wanted me alive, they wouldn't have allowed me to turn out like this," he said, thinking. Maybe he was his parent's punishment for their hubris… a curse and a shackle to his family. 

"Your sister… I'm guessing she's the favourite?" asked Eliza.

"You think?" Kazuki snapped, his voice filled with venom and poison. Awkward silence filled the room. He shouldn't have snapped like that, Kazuki thought, but he had to make a point.

"Does it get hard?" asked Eliza. 

"Family? I mainly ignore them, you know that by now…"

"No! Like… this?" Eliza wasn't too sure of how to describe it, it seems.

Kazuki's eyes shifted right, trying to see her. He slowly tilted his head, only for her to push it back into place. "Work? Not really?" Kazuki wasn't so sure of it himself. "I've been doing this for years. It isn't always just asset termination, sometimes it's protection, retrieval, logistics or training."

"I can't say much on this, I haven't delved quite deep into this topic, other than a few law reports…" Eliza trailed off. That much was still enough for him. "Still, it must get tiring, right? You were a contractor back in uni and school, weren't you?" 

"Why do you think I was always late or missing?"

Eliza let off a slightly embarrassed chuckle under her breath. "Of course, I should have pin-pointed two with two…" She trailed off, leaving Kazuki alone in the thought.

He slowly placed his hands together, feeling his tough skin rub against itself. "I… guess it is tiring. I rarely sleep and eat… No. You're right. Objectively, it's tiring."

"S—So why don't you take a break…"

Kazuki paused. "Your worry is misplaced."

"How can I NOT be worried?!" Eliza shook for a moment, pausing her work before continuing. "All these years… you've been helping me, encouraging me onwards and always paid the bill whenever the Student Council went out to eat!"

"High school or uni?" Kazuki cut in.

"BOTH!" Eliza raised her voice, frustrated. He probably shouldn't have done that… "Even back when we met, you were a contractor, as you ate with me, Archius, Chloé, Barclay and Hannah: you were a contractor… Every passing day was just you…" Her voice trailed off.

Kazuki stood firm in his mind. "And?" He sounded almost snarling at her.

"Just why? WHY didn't you tell me? You didn't tell Barclay, not even Hannah! Just… why didn't you tell me who you really were? I asked myself that for a whole year… I didn't want to message you such a question, I told myself that it was fine to not ask, but…"

"—What do you think happens if I told you?" asked Kazuki. "What would it had changed?"

"—I could have helped you." It was her turn to cut in. She continued, "I could have approached our first investigation with more tact and understanding… How could I have known anything?! I couldn't have lived knowing that I basically sentenced you to death!"

"Yet here I am," said Kazuki. "Do not worry about this. It's just a shift of perspective. If you're worried, those years were not a lie." He maintained the truth, he had to get this across to her.

"But why didn't you tell me?" She repeated herself.

Kazuki let off another sigh, fighting the urge to swallow another Halolazil pill. "What could I have told you? Approach you one day as you ate lunch with Chloé and tell you that I was a contractor, a paid mercenary. The fact that the last nine years of my life were in constant agony?"

Eliza paused… She stopped working, withdrawing her hands as Kazuki heard the steel clutter of tools onto the desk beside them. He could hear her audibly mumble to herself. 

"Sorry," was all she said. "Sorry… I didn't mean to act like I was a—"

"—Don't apologise," he said. "You worry a lot, you worry about things you can't control. You can't help it. You spent half your life in control of it. I know it's hard, but let go. It's okay to worry. I'll live." 

He shifted his head towards her, looking directly into those crimson bulbs. She looked worried, for sure, but he wasn't the right person for this…

He hoped that she didn't realise that it was his mother's words he just repeated. And it seems she didn't, as a slight smile engulfed her lips. "You're right, I shouldn't worry about you contractors, you guys are quite the tough nuts to crack."

Kazuki twisted his head back around as Eliza continued her work. It wasn't exactly what he was going for, but it it helped her: good. She won't understand the idea that death is just part of the job, he knows that. And as a substitute, it's awful. She'll go around believing that they'll survive anything. 

Contractors do not. But it should help…

"Yeah…" Kazuki trailed off.

He felt a hand pat his arm, as if trying to assure him of something, it felt warm. But he didn't let himself be swallowed by the thought. "Well, moving on… What is even special about these implants, Kaz?" asked Eliza, out of nowhere, both hands working on fixing the exospine, one hand latched onto an open port and other jammed in. 

He couldn't tell what she intended to do with that information.

"Flexibility. Dexterity. Endurance. It's experimental. It can handle far stronger stimulants." started Kazuki, "Allows for greater speed. But… It's experimental…"

"So… unreliable?" 

"Yeah. Something like that." said Kazuki, feeling somewhat uncomfortable now. He never talked about his cybernetics, it was always a bit taboo with him. 

The mood became tense as Eliza tried finding something to latch onto with the conversation. "So… Do you all have spine implants? I remember seeing old photos from the war and—"

"No." stated Kazuki, "Exospines are expensive to maintain, only the richest mercs and governments can handle them without going into the red. Every augmented-implant lost is a greater loss than a whole company of regulars. But everything comes at a cost, even my own."

Eliza fell silent as Kazuki's tone went darker, it was clear that he wasn't too fond of his cybernetics. She simply nodded, lightly patting him on the back - his power-saving module made him more talkative. She continued working on his exospine either way. A few tugs and jolts here and there and she was done, at least that's what he felt. She placed the power charge back in, along with some cooling gel to help any pain or roughness in the hardware. 

"Great, it's half-done! There were some parts that needed replacement, but it should extend its life cycle for a bit," said Eliza. "We'll have to wait for the cooling gel to settle in, then we can continue. It might take a while…"

Kazuki nodded, twisting around. Replacements? There were no replacements. He ran out of them during the Splinter ops. He lightly clutched his chest, feeling the burnt skin from the acid spray. Most of it was gone, but the sensation never left his mind. "Thanks. Repairs will take some time."

Eliza slowly hovered closer to him. "Kaz."

He shuddered for a split moment as her eyes glowed, staring at him. "What?"

"In my—"

The door slid open. His mind cracked with energy. As he twisted his left hand, he drew at the door. Pointing a muzzle directly at Archius.