Hey, Shut Up, I'm Not Worried...

(Thanks so so SO much guys for reading and reviewing:) I never would've expected this many reads in such little time! *hysterically sobs into pillow* THANKYOU)

Carmela stood dumbfounded in front of the dark curly haired boy perched on his bike on the sidewalk. She crossed her arms and pursed her lips as he blinked nervously.

"I know you like... look fine, but I don't know, things like that are tough..." He said, focusing on the handlebars of his bike.

"What..." Carmela mockingly chuckled.

"What?" He said, looking defensive.

"How would you know anything about things like that?"

"Why can't I know about them?"

"You can but you don't."

"What the-- and how do you know I don't?"

Because this wasn't a typical parent death. My mom committed fucking suicide and I witnessed the aftermath of it, so if you say you've gone through that then I might say you know how I feel, but if not--

"Fuck off."

"Why-- why are you always saying that? I'm just trying to a have a normal conversation with you, and you're attacking me!"

Hm. He had a point. But this was weird. Carmela thought he hated her, so why would he ask about how she felt? Probably to embarrass her and remind her how pitiful she was and use this against her in the future to weaken her ego. Uh uh. Not happening. I ain't letting my guard down boy. She sighed and loosened her language though.

"Tae, I just don't wanna talk about it."

"Okay. But you should. I know how much it hur-"

"And I absolutely hate it when people say that."

"Can you stop interrupting me for like two seconds?"

"Sorry."

"I know you think I don't care. And you're completely right, I don't. I'm just saying, that it really does help if you talk about it. I kinda understand why you're so... you all the time..." He cleared his throat as Carmela narrowed her piercing eyes into him.

"What is your problem? Why are you so weird? Sometimes you're nice and then the next second your so mean again and-"

"Hey I was never nice, not even for a second." He replied.

"Oh my fuckin-"

"I was only saying that you should talk about your problems. It helped me. Saved me, really." Huh?

"Saved you? What happened?"

Tae rolled a little back on his bike with his feet, looking alarmed.

"Nothing happened, I'm just saying!!" He shouted with wide eyes.

"Alright, okay. You don't have to yell..." She said looking at the floor, upset he was getting angry. She was supposed to be one who got angry, not him. She glanced up at him and found he was looking at her softly. The wind blew his hair back and Carmela took in his angled face, his delicately blushed lips, and the soft creases under his clear eyes that were narrowed against the wind.

"I... fuck, I didn't mean to... you know what, here." He muttered, before looking directly determined right into her eyes.

"What?"

"My parents are both dead."

Carmela's heart thudded, and her she felt her knees go slightly weak, but she regained herself and gazed at the boy with soft eyes.

"I'm... I'm so sorry, Tae. I-- how?"

"Uhm... well... it's kinda hard to word it, but... basically, my dad. He beat my mom, until it killed her."

What the f- Carmela couldn't feel her legs anymore and her heart felt like it was being squeezed as she looked at Tae's shaded eyes. She understood. She understood how he understood. How he knew what she was feeling. It may not be the same but it equally--

"Carmela?" Jules' voice sounded behind her, and she felt her friend's arm swing around her, but Carmela's body was full of unknown jitteriness. Why did she feel so shaken?

"Hey girl? What are y'all talking about?" Jules asked in a cheery voice. She eyed the tall dark haired boy in front of them. He glanced at Carmela before turning and jumping off the curb with his bike. God, Jules, YOU RUINED OUR... our... fuck. Our nothing.

But Carmela turned and called after him as he stood from his seat and began to peddle away.

"Hey! Wait, were you for real? Tae--"

"Hell, Carmela, I was just messing with you!" He laughed and sped up, disappearing down the road.

Are you fucking joking? How on earth can someone joke about something like that? Unless it wasn't really a joke. Fuck. There was legit something wrong with this guy. He was fucked up and he fucked Carmela up too. She turned around and brushed past Jules, towards their round stone table. She followed behind, silently confused.

"What was that about Carmela? What was he saying?"

"Nothing. It doesn't matter."

"Hm, really or do you just not want to tell me?"

"I don't want to tell you Jules, I would have if I wanted to. Its not important. Hes not important."

"Fine."

"Lets go home. Do you wanna go home?"

"Yeah."

Carmela felt bad for acting like a bitch with Jules, but she was annoyed and angry enough. For a moment, she thought... she actually thought he... he cared. She thought he was asking about her because he was actually worried. She may have been harsh with him but that was just because she didn't want him to figure out how surprised and flattered she was when he asked if she was okay. But in the end it was what she guessed. He was just messing with her. Trying to get on her nerves. But a tiny part of her believed that he did care, just a little. Why else was the asshole so nervous? And was he lying about his parents? His mom?

Ugh, all the fucked up thoughts bounced around in Carmela's mind and she sighed impatiently as she grabbed her purse off her chair and walked with Jules to Hosi's car. Jules had driven them today in the car Hosi had let them borrow. Hosi was too busy to come with and now they sure as hell knew what he was doing. Carmela learned how to drive, but she hated it. It was intimidating and she was scared it would wobble out of control and smash into something. It was the only thing she was scared to do. Well, probably the only thing. She was also scared to love or get in a relationship. Because, damn, it would turn her life into the same hell it had turned her mom's life into. But that was another story, one she didn't want to imagine.

They got in the front seats and Jules started up the car, blasting the radio. A slow Post Malone song came that pushed her back in her seat and drunkened her mind.

"Carmela?" Jules said over the rap, as she drove.

"Yeah?" She mumbled, gazing out the window.

"You know that I love you right? That I'm always gonna be here with you?"

"I know. I love you so much Jules. I'm sorry for being such a bitch sometimes."

"Sometimes?" Jules laughed and Carmela smiled. She wanted Jules to know how sorry she was, how glad she was of their friendship, how much Jules meant to her, but she wasn't really good at those... things.

But her smile dropped and jerked up in her seat as she peered out the window. Her heart pounded in her chest as she widened her eyes out the window.

Tae was sitting on a bench by the sidewalk, his head in his hands. His fingers were tangled through his curly hair, and his bike was lying on the pavement.

Carmela's shocked eyes followed him and she turned in his seat as they whizzed past him.

"Carmela?"

"Hm?"

"So what do you think?"

"A-about what Jules?"

"Were you seriously not paying attention to a word I was saying?"

"I... I'm sor-"

"Forget it. It's fine."

Jules clenched her jaw into a small smile and focused on the road ahead of them. Carmela couldn't believe it. What did she just see? Why was Tae sitting there like that? Was he... was he crying? Maybe he was just waiting for the guys or something. Yeah, for a ride. He was probably tired. Yeah, that's right.

Was it though? Was he alright?