Chapter 5: Can you feel it?

"Taine Mecer, code name the shiv. Do you know what that even means? A knife that's used as a weapon in prisons. A powerful code name." Nemis smirked. He leaned back against the wall and took out a box of cigarettes.

"What can I say? I do bad things, and I do them well." I shrugged and put the knife into my pocket.

"I see." He stated with a slight chuckle. He then lit the cigarette and took a pull. A white cloud crept out of his mouth, which floated up to the ceiling and disappeared. He offered me a cigarette, and I shook my head. "Suit yourself. I see Mrs Boss Lady has a lot of faith in you. I work directly under her, and she ordered me to come here to deliver information for a kid." He shook his head.

"I must be some kid, hey?" I asked, and he grunted. Why was Nemis stalling?

"How's the target?"

"The mission is progressing."

"Did Peanut tell you to steal Miss Randall's heart? Do you think you can do that? Playing around with emotions… makes you a sick bastard."

"All part of the job."

"I've heard you have been on similar missions before. All a success." He added. "Notice anything about Jane yet? Kind of withdrawn, distant, has no trust in others… isolated. Do you know why that is?"

"No, we are just getting to know each other."

"Jane lost her entire family about 2 years ago. Unfortunate car crash. Well, that's what she was made to believe. Both her parents worked for D.T.A., and a rival gang took them out. Much like your brother. James… Justin?"

"Joshua." I snapped and clenched my hands into fists.

"Right. The stupid boy let himself drop his guard. A shame, really." Nemis remarked and pressed his cigarette into my curtain. It burnt a hole from the hot ash, then he let the cigarette go, and it dropped onto my floor. I wanted to slit his throat for talking about Joshua. I kept quiet and acted like he didn't bother me.

"You control your emotions well. Keep that in mind when you make the target fall in love with you." He smiled and walked over to me. He pulled out a small paper card and handed it to me. "This is the email address of our leader. She requests that you send information about the target to her directly. All you know about Jane is to be sent to her. Pictures included. At least one snap of the girl every day. Not that difficult."

"Do I still forward information to Peanut?"

"No. Agent Peanut is no longer your handler. You report only to our leader. I'll show myself out." Nemis stated and then walked out of my room. I punched the wall next to me to calm down the hatred I had for that mother flipper. Nemis was an arrogant, selfish piece of shit.

I moved the picture of Joshua and me back into its position and worked on the email to send the leader. Jane's family was targeted by a rival gang, the same situation as my brother. Perhaps she had the key as to who killed Joshua. I was more dedicated to this mission than any other. I could finally get my revenge and spill the blood of every person involved in my brother's death. I finally had a lead, and Jane was the answer. I was more drawn to her than ever before. Her heart was mine.

***

I greeted Jane every time I walked past her. She gave me a small smile or at least just glanced my way, which was a lot better than ignoring me. I pretended to be texting and took a picture of her as she walked past with Rocksyn. I double-checked if the flash was off so that no one would notice. I caught the moment where she laughed at something Rocksyn said. I stared at the picture. She looked … happy, but it didn't reach her eyes. At least now I understood why.

I went to class and decided that it was time to make Rocksyn like me. She and Jane seemed to be close. It was always good to make friends with your girlfriend's friend. Rocksyn will influence a lot of how Jane would act and think when it came to me. She would always turn to Rocksyn for advice, and I knew that girls always talk to each other about their boyfriends. Maybe I'll add a good word in for Cameron.

"So I know we don't really see eye-to-eye on most things, but I like Jane. I like her quite a bit, and actually, I want to get to know her more. I know my reputation from my previous school has surfaced. Yet I still find myself drawn to her." I said to Roxanne I had pulled her aside and asked her if we could talk. She hesitantly agreed, but luckily she decided to hear what I had to say.

"No offence, Taine, I know your kind. You find a girl who is sweet and kind. Like Jane, then you believe that she's the one to make you change your ways. The one that makes you stop being a player. It only lasts so long." Rocksyn replied.

"I'm still going to try to be with Jane. I believe it's her decision whether she will hold my past against me or take me as I am now. I ask that we settle this hatred that we have between us. It's just going to make things for Jane a lot more difficult, and I don't want her to feel like she has to choose."

"I won't promise that we will ever be friends. You can forget that idea." She laughed. "You are right, though. Jane has been through some stuff, and she deserves to be happy. If being with you makes her happy, then I won't stand in your way."

"Thank you." I smiled.

"It won't last. This bad boy vibe you have going on won't keep her interested for long." Rocksyn added before she walked away.

Damn, her next boyfriend had to be one hell of a gent. I should tell Cameron to give up now. There was no hope when it came to Rocksyn.

I walked over to where all the rugby boys were gathered. The list for who made the team was up.

"Bro! Check it." Jarrod cheered and pushed me closer to the board. There were 17 names on the list. A rugby team consisted of 15, but the coach wanted two more players as reserves. I scanned the list and spotted my name. Cameron and Jarrod were also on the list.

"Shots, dude." I smiled. I had made the team as expected.

"We have to celebrate. I say party at my house on Friday night." Cameron added and placed his arms over Jarrod and my shoulders.

"Like just for the team or..." Jarrod asked.

"Nah, dude. Anyone can come." Cameron laughed.

We headed back to the cafeteria since it was break time. Rocksyn was sitting by a table with all the girls in the cheerleading squad. They handed out yellow outfits with black and white pom poms. I scanned the cafeteria but couldn't find Jane. I told Cameron that I would be back then set out to find her. I eventually located Jane in the library. She had her nose stuck in a book while sitting on the floor.

She looked up at me as I sat down next to her.

"What are you reading?" I smiled.

"Doctor Sleep by Stefan King." She replied. Her perfume smelt ... clean. It wasn't floral-scented or sweet, just pleasant.

"So, you like horrors," I stated, and she shrugged. Did that mean yes or no? "You smell nice," I added.

"Oh, uh... thanks."

"I never actually saw the point in reading a book. You can just watch the movie."

"I find books calming. I can just read and not be disturbed while I journey into another person's life."

"Are you hinting I should leave? Don't worry, sweetheart, I'll keep quiet. You can read." I smirked. Jane searched my face with her eyes then turned back to her book. She ignored me quite well, even when I moved the strand of hair out of her face. I just watched her as she read. It made me feel at ease just observing her suck in another world. I noticed that Jane was indeed pretty. The type of pretty that you recognised but wouldn't approach because they had a boyfriend. The girl that was pretty enough to be your wife eventually. The type of pretty one would settle for.

"I think I'm slowly starting to understand you," I said and broke the silence between us. Jane looked up at me and raised her eyebrow. "I couldn't put my finger on it in the beginning. It's the same look I had when I lost someone close to me. You probably feel alone or wish that you would have died along with them. I was also afraid of opening up. All that I felt was this numb pain. I just want to tell you that it goes away."

Jane stared at me for a second longer, then stood up.

"You're wrong." She stated, then started walking away. I jumped to my feet and grabbed her hand to pull her closer to me. She gasped and looked up at me, scared.

I put my hand above her heart and felt her pulse rapidly beating.

"Your heart still beats, Jane," I whispered and put her hand on my heart. "Mine still beats. We are still alive."

"Then why can't I feel anything?" She softly muttered.

"You have to accept that you are allowed to feel. You are allowed to be happy, laugh, smile ... without feeling guilty about it." I explained. She slightly nodded, and her eyes glanced at my lips.

"You do feel. I know it. You feel something between us." I added and stepped towards her. "I can feel it," I stated and moved my hand across the top curve of her breasts. I lightly let my hand flow over her shirt, and she seemed to stop breathing.

"Can you feel it?" I asked.

"I... don't know what I feel." She responded. I leaned in closer to her ear and touched her ear lope with my lips.

"It's pure attraction, sweetheart," I mumbled. Her hand softly gripped my shirt, and I pulled back to look at her. Jane seemed flustered, but she didn't move away from me.

"You're an interesting one, Jane Randall. I look forward to getting closer to you." I smiled and touched the side of her face. Her eyes fluttered close, and she enjoyed the warmth from my hand. I leaned in closer to kiss her, but the school bell rang.

Her eyes shot open, and she tensed up. I stepped back from her and walked away. Reel her in, but don't hook her just yet. I wanted to make Jane realise that she wanted me. I wanted her to show that she was interested and step out of her comfort zone.

Rocksyn glared at me when I walked back into the cafeteria. I winked at her and caught up with the rugby team. Cameron was going on about some television show he watched. It was about a werewolf that was weak and an invaluable member of the pack until she saved an angel. Something like that.

All I could think about was how Jane made me want her to want me. It was like she was a drug that I tasted just for fun and kept going back for more. Slowly making me crave her. This girl was definitely something, and I had to be careful. This attraction couldn't develop into something more on my side. She was just part of the job, whether I actually liked her or not. It will all come to an end just like every mission does. I had to be careful.