What I was Taught

My parents are vary religious, yeah this didn't help when I came out. My parents taught me being gay and trans is a sin. Well I'm both. I had to discover the truth for myself on my own.

What they told me was just another lie. I had to deal with the same questions that arise for a long time. I have been faithful towards the lord despite this. I was on a turning point when I discovered that I was gay. At the time I started digging to try and see if God hates gays. But I couldn't find anything. In my search I came across a bible verse talking about how same sex intercourse is wrong. I did find verses that the author of "Does God Hate Gays" that he used to push his point. When I read those verses there was no real indication that it was supposed to be talking against being gay. The author drew conclusions that didn't have the support from those texts.

After reading more of his book and diciding he had no real evidence I stopped reading. I hadn't given up though I mad plans and tried to research more, but with not much to really go on I didn't get far. Life also happened so I didn't do the majority of my plans. My sister Mary is a youth pastor and was able to help me and explain to me more. Affirming my idea that God doesn't hate gays. Even though he dose see having sex with same sex is wrong.

As Christians we are called to love all people, so even if being gay was a sin we are called to be loving. I tried to be this way towards a friend who came out to me when I was still confused by all of the things my parents taught to me. I was holding onto a religion and ideas that they taught me, not knowing better. As such I wasn't supporting, but I was still their friend even if I didn't agree with it at the time. It was a time when I didn't want to believe the whole religion was lie, that I was told, even if my parents have lied to me time, and time again. I was very good at being a little Christian girl.

Spent my whole life believing on thing and having to figure out what to do with it. I was taught from an early age and my parents have their own bible studies every night. The bible was read almost every year and I went to every church service and group there was. I wasn't good at memorizing the bible verses, but I remember all of the stories. I was worse than the preacher's kids and I knew every detail. I could correct the seminar and explain why it was wrong, along with what was right.

It was something handy when I was younger and into the religion of Christianity. But now it's annoying that I can't forget these things and that I know so much about it. I always knew the answer and could explain the whole bible to someone. I could defend my faith if the time ever arose, but know I wish I couldn't do any of that.

Writen April 18, 2019.