The Confession

We spent a week of preparation in Meral Town before continuing our journey. Along the way, Izz told me a story of Naga Town, about how it's unfortunately turned into a lawless town. A brief story of him visiting Naga Town for the first time. It's really saddening to hear a tragic story like that, perhaps my village faced the same fate?

Ah, what am I thinking? That can't be true. I refuse to believe it.

I'm tapping my forehead trying to get that thought out of my head.

"What are you doing Dahlia?" Izz asked curiously.

"No it's nothing, I'm just…" I hesitate for a moment before saying the first thing that comes into my head. "had a brain freeze. Yeah, A brain freeze." I show him my canteen.

He inspects his with a confused look on his face.

"But this is room temperature?"

"It's a girl thing." I disregard his question. It seems to be working since he stopped inquiring about me.

Izz can be somewhat dense most of the time. As long as I have known him, he has always been a straightforward person and never really hides anything. Not to mention about how nonchalant he is doing something that would easily make me flattered.

I had always known him as a very strong individual. Even when we face a lot of obstacles in our way, Izz easily crushed our way through them all. If I were alone, I wouldn't know what to do on my own.

The roads were not particularly bad, but the constant walking from dawn really strained me of my stamina.

Izz noticed me breathing heavily so he started to slow his pace. I drop onto my knees to catch a quick break.

It's not unusual for him to offer me a helping hand despite me turning him down everytime if possible. Izz reaches his hand out to me. 

"Let me?" He asked.

Another nonchalant habit of his, but this time despite a clear blush on my face I unconsciously grabbed his hand and smiled.

"Thank you."

I figured that I had become a bit too comfortable with him considering I just let him carry me on his back. If It were me before, I would've firmly declined just not to burden him more than I already did to him.

***

From afar In the middle of the paddy field, Eira sees them; seeing how close the two of them are, she smiles. It reminded her of Shin. Holding the necklace that Shin gave to her. She saw herself and Shin in them.

In the distance following the river direction we'd found Naga Town, I didn't realise we were at a much higher elevated altitude until we saw that very town, far below. It'd still take another whole day just to reach there on foot.

I get a great sleep before we continue tomorrow. Or so I thought, when I woke up I already found myself sleeping on the bed in the inn in Naga Town. Izz is having his breakfast when I jump out of bed.

"What! We're already here?!"

"Yeah, I supposed I should just carry you all the way here last night since we were already really close."

"But still… You could've woken me up first." I was really annoyed that he did that.

"I could just do it right now if you want to experience it."

"No, it's good," I said while covering my flattered face. I peeked between my fingers and It doesn't seem like he noticed it.

This guy, I can't believe him! Saying things so carelessly. Does he really have no idea?

"I'm going out for a while."

"Where? Can I follow you? It's scary to stay alone."

"I don't want you to follow me. I'll be going to the guild, it's located inside a bar. If the guys there see you, they would definitely cause a scene. I would like to avoid conflict if possible."

His saying it like that really brings an image of scary-looking dudes who would start a fight just because you look at them wrong: What are you looking at lady? You've got a problem?

I shook my, in the sign of understanding.

It's really boring here alone, Izz have been gone for quite a while now. Looking out from the window, I can only see a lifeless town, with people being wary of each other. No kids were seen playing around like the previous towns we'd been to.

To say the least, this town really scary.

As I try to relax a little more.

"BAM!" A loud noise coming from the closet.

"Is anyone there?" Nervously I asked. Although I can only see the dark through the crack in the closet door, the feeling of unease coming from that closet. Once again I asked, "Anyone over there?"

The door creaks open slightly.

I looked around the room, trying to look for anything that could possibly make that sound. I couldn't find anything, the only possible scenario is the sound is coming from the closet. I try to look even closer to the closet. Reach out my arm trying to open the door.

"BAM!" I jumped away running through the door and exiting the building right away. I didn't know what to do so I instinctively looked for Izz's whereabouts.

As I'm getting deeper into the town could almost feels like somebody is following me from behind. Still being wary about earlier, I started running. I was too focused on my back that I failed to navigate where I was going. Before I was aware of that, I was already in an alleyway and bumped into a scary-looking dude, he looked exactly like one I would imagine a scary-looking dude would look like. 

"Lady, are you look where are you going?"

"Am sorry I didn't mean to." I put both my hands on my head covering my ears.

He smiled looking at me as if a carnivore just found his food after starving for days.

"Lady… are you breaking away from your owner aren't you?"

"N-no! I'm no one's."

Before I could get away, he grabbed my arm. This strength, it make me want to puke. The pressure around my arm reminds me of that man. I hate him, thinking about him suck all the soul left in my face. I tried to scream but he quickly covered my mouth.

"Don't scream, it'll be alright," he said in a malicious tone.

He wanted to drag me away but before we could get far into the alleyway a man with a sword came running toward us and sliced the man's hand.

I was so scared that I closed my eyes and readied myself to embrace a hit to me. But for whatever reason, the man then grabbed me away.

"I'll be taking her now, thank you."

With my closed eyes, I can sense that he is taking me somewhere. This is the end for me, isn't it? Ah, I at least wish to have the opportunity to state my goodbye to Izz. It has been a fun journey, thank you.

This guy must be someone sent by the King of Nigati.

"Are you alright? Miss Dahlia." The man asked.

My heartbeat races faster, breathing nervously, my hands are trembling, I feel like fainting, I can't feel my legs, not out of fear… But out of the glimmer of hope! Yes, I recognised this voice! I can't be wrong, right? I mean, is my mind playing tricks on me in this vulnerable position?

I mustered the courage to open my eyes slowly. What met my gaze were a pair of yellow eyes staring at me with concern.

"Shin…Is that you?" I asked in my shaky voice.

"I'm glad." he smiled "I'll escort you back to Chief."

I couldn't remember what happened after. I couldn't even remember that Shin had come to my rescue, how ungrateful am I?

***

My head hurt, I felt like I was sleeping in an uncomfortable position. It's not that I am lying on the bed. I was in motion! The first thing I see is the moon shining as it hangs in the night sky. Although my vision was still blurry, I found Izz carrying me in his arms, away from Naga Town. He is by no means the biggest guy, but his arms are muscular with relatively big hands for his size, squeezing my lower thigh and supporting my upper back. Albeit his hands are rough, his gloves are very gentle with my skin.

The cold of the night touches my exposed skin as the crackling sound of the bushes we hike through accompanies the silence of the forest. Confusion consumed my head, and then my cracked voice muffled.

"Where're we going?"

He turned his head down toward me, his face had a hint of concern. I had never seen him in this light before. It makes me even more confused. What possibly happened?

"Are you alright, Dahlia..?"

"Uh, I don… I don't know. I couldn't remember."

Although his lips remain in a steady position, a subtle squint in his eyes suggests a grateful smile as he witnesses my awakening.

"Don't worry Shin had told me everything."

"Where are we heading to?"

The atmosphere shifted, my question was ignored. His attitude was strange until now. What was it that I was not aware of? What is it that makes him so upset? It is true that I had spent quite some time with him, but it is also true that I still don't a lot about him or what he could be thinking.

He was the first person in a long time to treat me differently from other people, although I was from a bad environment, I still believe that not a lot of people out there would go their way to help me get this far.

"Dahlia… I'm sorry…"

"Huh, what are you talking about?"

"I'm sorry that couldn't protect you… I'm sorry that you have to go through such a thing again… If I could, I would've… No, I'm sorry. There is no excuse."

The moon glowed in the nearby lake, the same way it glowed from the tear that flowed down his cheek. I flapped my mouth wordlessly. Those tears are my fault. I failed to keep it from flowing.

It may not be my position to, but I wiped away his tears and opened my mouth trying to encourage him. I failed yet again, as I involuntarily let out words that accurately represent my perception of him as an individual.

"That's not true, it never was… You're always there for me."

His facial expression changes, not in a bad or a good way, it's the expression of someone who is determined. We continue out in the silence of nature for a while.

***

The moon had begun to descend into the western horizon indicating that it was already past midnight. We stopped by the cave to rest. Izz set up a campfire to make soup. The deafening silence makes my ear more sensitive to noises most of the time I miss it. The sound of cricket in the woods, a fire crackling, the spoon hit against the pot to the soup boiling.

He handed me a loaf of bread. It's been a while since we ate this food combination. I smile as it reminds me of the first time the two of us met. I don't know what I'm feeling right now, all I can tell is that it was related to the feeling of joy. I had the biggest smile on my face before I turned red up to my ears, I quickly covered it with my hands.

No way, could it be? Do I even know what it feels like? But I'm no one to him.

As I giggled with myself, Izz was just there staring into space stirring the soup. I walked up to him with my face filled with anxiety.

"Izz, are you alright..?"

My concern grew when I looked at him, even with a mask covering his face, I could still sense sorrow in his face.

Out of nowhere he then asked a strange question, one that was asked by an old magical sage as a sidequest type of thing.

"Tell me, Dahlia… What's your heart desires the most..?"

"My heart..? I think I just want to go back to my village."

Disappointment appears on his covered face.

"Is that so, then what comes after?"

"What do you mean?"

Like seriously, why is he talking in riddles? I can't understand him.

I'm not as smart as you, why can't you say it in front of me? Why did you have to leave me out of the conversation? What are you scared of, it's not like I can do anything.

"It's nothing." He then got up and walked away.

What is that? What was that sorrowful smirk on his face before he said that? It must be something that happened in the past even before me. I may not be the best option but he can still tell me what the problem is, it's not like we're going to be together for a long time— I just stood there thinking.

It clicked, that's right! We're not going to be together after this journey, because of that untouchable promise. I was bothered by it of course, but I thought he would care— Does he?

Is he thinking about that?

"Tch…" my respect for him didn't stop me from being angry at him, I was really annoyed.

The audacity, why aren't you telling me, if you were bothered by that? Tears flowing down my face, I yelled.

"You idiot!"

He couldn't help but ask.

"What has got into you?"

"Are you an idiot..?! Why can't you say it to my face… Why can't you trust me?!"

His stunned lips shake as if it trying to say something, but no words are uttered. I ran to him and buried my face into his chest simultaneously wrapping my arms around him. In a tight embrace, I murmured.

"You really are an idiot."

His usual gentle smile can be interpreted: So you've figured it out.

"Sorry… I'm sorry that I couldn't bring myself to." He apologised as if he was in shame.

"Izz Yukan…" A bit of strength to lift up my buried face came to me as I held onto him. His heart beating slower than mine. As tight as I hold him, I think he could easily feel it too.

If it's not you, it must be me!

The first person I had ever wished to be with was a leader of a great military back in the day, a former stranger, and an absolute warrior. Perhaps I was not a good match for him. And he may be a bit dense in this sense. But it was exactly that, that made me fall for him.

I have to say it. Say it now! If I don't I could never reach for him in another day.

These words, I couldn't seem to force them out my throat.

If I don't say it, he will not understand!

"Izz Yukan, it may not seem like it, but I…"

Force it all out. If I don't catch you now, someone else will.

"I…"

Say it already!

"I want to be with you… That's what my heart desires the most… Please stay with me."

Silence ensued between us. I don't know if it went accordingly. Regret began swallowing me from the tip of my hair to the bottom of my feet.

Negative thoughts quickly flooded my head. I didn't just disrespect him, did I? What did just do? I conclude the situation with my own feeling assuming he felt the same. Did I mess up and upset him?

If this is an early goodbye… I wanted this farewell to fall on good terms.

What am I thinking? This is not a goodbye, he hasn't uttered a single word yet, calm down.

As I was arguing with myself, I noticed his eyes widen. I knew this expression, he was surprised. I felt like my knees had given up, I fell as I held onto him, making the two of us kneel.

His lips finally let out comprehensible words without riddles.

"If that is what you want, then can you remember me..? Can you remember our journey together after I bring you back to your home town..?"

Our promise is not an ordinary one, it's a sacred contract using mana. Once the journey is over, our memories will be wiped forcefully. Him saying that, does that mean there is a way to bypass it? It must be bond extremely strong that it sits beyond the deal.

With this in mind, I yelled.

"Yes, and that's a promise!"

Despite the chilly night, I can feel the heat on my neck. I'm in the stage of exhaustion and energised both at the same time. My vision went blurry, and my head went blank. My body was moving on its own, I moved closer to him. I pulled his face closer to mine. I bring my chin higher and yank his face to mine. His eyes widened and mine closed. What kind of face am I making right now?

He bit my lower lip before he pulled away. The taste of blood lingers on my lips. He looks shocked as he touches his lips; unlike his cracked lips, mine was soft, smooth and well-hydrated.

Once again I found myself crying, but this time it was in his arms, and for the first time, I don't mind relying on him for everything.

***