41. Chapter 41

"Aaaand CUT!"

Lori sighed as she allowed her aching arm to droop. Lifting the car wasn't the difficult part, it was the fact that they'd been shooting this bit over, and over, and over again, and her arm was cramping up fiercely as a result. To say nothing of the ache in her jaw from the constant smiling. Remembering the heavy load attached to her arm, Lori arrested her movement before fully letting it go slack, and gently placed the car on the ground again. If she'd dropped the vehicle, she'd never hear the end of it from—

"What the heck are you doin' out there!?"

...Speak of the devil.

Pulling herself upright, and trying to discretely work the kinks out of her back in the process, Lori turned around just in time to see the portly proprietor of the business to which Lori shackled herself, waddling over to her in a huff, his patchwork business suit and ratty, disheveled hat covered in a fine sheen from some combination of his perpetual outrage, and the sweltering, unrelenting heat that assaulted the car lot.

"Hey, Flip," she greeted him, trying to sound only half as tired as she felt, but failing miserably.

"That's Mister Flip to you, girlie," snapped the older man, jabbing one finger that looked remarkably like an overcooked sausage in her direction. "And I repeat, what are you doin' to me? Do you know how much it costs to shoot these things? This was supposed to be a one-day shoot, and now we're on day three!"

"I'm just following the script...sir," Lori replied, tersely, her fingers inadvertently clenching into a fist as she did so.

"You're not smiling enough!" Flip replied, grabbing his own jowls and yanking on them for emphasis. "Happy girls make the customers happy! And happy customers come down to buy my cars. This ain't rocket science!"

Lori inhaled sharply. "I'm...trying, my best. Honest."

"You said that two days ago. And now I'm starting to believe you." Flipp crossed his arms with an annoyed huff and glared at the eldest Loud.

Lori closed her eyes and steeled herself for the tirade that was certain to come. Such was the routine they'd fallen into since they'd started filming this commercial. Lori would try her best to perform the thirty-odd seconds of material that was called for, Flip would berate her for one perceived slip up or another, and then they'd try it again. It was proving to be a very trying experience, particularly when the critiques from one take directly contradicted another, and not for the first time Lori found herself desperately wishing she'd been hired for something a little more life-threatening. Anything to get her away from this obnoxious little man and his awful commercial.

And yet, the verbal tirade never came. Hesitantly opening her eyes, Lori found the older man staring off into the distance, stroking his chin. An oddly contemplative affectation for the normally bombastic business owner.

"Maybe I'm just expecting too much of ya," he said, at last, shaking his head in frustration. Lori desperately wanted to hope that this might represent some kind of turning point. But cynicism built up over time, much like a callus, and three days into this, Lori wasn't anywhere near naive enough to seriously entertain that possibility.

"I mean, you were the cheapest person I could get for this gig." Well, so much for that. "You've got no experience and no marketable skills. Which seemed like a great deal for me, 'cause I could justify paying you next to nothing. But you can't even read the dang lines convincingly!"

Lori twitched in irritation but held her tongue. It was an unfair...but not entirely untrue assessment of her abilities. Though, in her defense, she'd never claimed to be an actor, something that Flip had been oddly unconcerned about during the hiring process.

"There's only two reasons I'm not cutting you loose here and now!" Flip held up two fingers, demonstratively. "One: you being able to lift the car all by yourself is saving me to spend on special effects. And two: you just so happen to fit into the only costume I was able to get for this thing."

He gave her an appraising look.

"And even then, it's a pretty close thing." He corrected himself. "Might need to switch out that prop car for something bigger. Maybe it'll make you look smaller by comparison.

That was crossing a line. The "costume" was Lori's biggest problem with this whole ordeal, if you could even call it that! The outfit, in its entirety, consisted solely of thigh-high boots and a skin-tight leotard seemingly designed for the sole purpose of showing off the occupants bust. That she would wear the damn thing at all, let alone make it look as good as she did, was nothing short of a miracle!

"Hang on," Lisa interjected. "That costume that you are describing sounds an awful lot like—"

"I was kind of hoping you wouldn't pick up on that," Lori muttered, wincing. "But yeah, more or less. I had Leni do her thing, which is why my current costume looks as good as it does, but the costume I wore for that commercial was the starting point."

"Why, may I ask, would you base your now iconic outfit on something so thoroughly tied to an experience that you obviously hated?"

"Well for one thing, it's was a huge hit with the fans, which is a pretty big part of starting a hero career," Lori admitted. "But I'll get to the real reason. Trust me, it'll make sense."

"I certainly hope so," Lisa replied, rubbing her chin thoughtfully. "Though, I couldn't help but notice that you didn't mention a cape as part of your original ensemble. Did Leni—?"

"That was actually Lincoln's idea," said the blonde. Her posture didn't change in the slightest, but her cheeks darkened noticeably. "He said it'd make me look even cooler while flying."

"I should have guessed," Lisa muttered, shaking her head. "They're considered to be woefully old-fashioned by today's standards, but that's Lincoln for you. So how did you take your verbal lambasting?"

"RAAAAAARGH!" Lori screamed, slamming her fist into one of the many brick walls common to that area of the city. The blow pulverized the area of impact, leaving a fist-sized hole in its wake, but moments later the surrounding bricks exploded inward, resulting in a hole that was several Lori's high and wide.

"With grace and dignity," the blonde replied, coughing into her fist. "As you'd probably expect."

"I suspect you reacted exactly like I'd suspect you would," Lisa deadpanned. "There's a reason mother and father bought Hand and Foot insurance for every part of the house."

"At least half of that is because of Lynn. And we'd have much broader coverage if they didn't make Luna replace everything she broke."

"Fair enough," Lisa shrugged. "Regardless, I'm hoping getting yelled at by your boss didn't trigger some kind of traumatic awakening in you. Aside from being nonsensical, it would also be beneath you."

"Believe it or not, I am made of sterner stuff than that," said Lori, rolling her eyes. "No, that happened later. See, after we'd shot a few more takes, none of which were good enough for Flipp, we stopped for a break, and I got some unexpected visitors."

"LORI!"

The girl in question squawked in surprise as something slammed itself into her chest. She barely felt the impact, which was reassuring, but the suddenness of the attack left her in a state of frantic indecision. Caught between fight or flight, her body ended up compromising. One arm raised in what could charitably be seen as part of a combat stance, and the other extended behind her, as if she was preparing to leap for cover. Her legs, having apparently failed to read the room, abruptly jerked in opposite directions, leaving her bow-legged. It was, perhaps, the least impressive pose in the history of posing, and Lori immediately regretted not having signed up for the Super Hero Posing class that was currently being offered at the Community Center.

It was at this point that Lori finally laid eyes on the thing that had flung itself at her. And there, pressed squarely against her chest, was a familiar head of snow-white hair.

"Lincoln?" She asked, incredulously. She gently grabbed the boy by the torso, and pried him off of her, holding him out at arm's length.

She had been partially right. It was definitely her little brother. He had the hair, the teeth, and the adorably energetic smile. However, rather than his usual orange polo shirt and jeans, the boy had instead opted for far less...conventional attire.

"I'm not Lincoln," the masked boy declared, straightening his red tights and flowing blue cape as best he could while clutched in Lori's grip, and then puffing out his chest. "I'm Ace Savvy! The World's Savviest Detective!"

It was simultaneously adorable and mortifying. Moreso the former, since it was always endearing how thoroughly Lincoln threw himself into this role, but Lori's teenage insecurity was strong, and continued to try and pull her towards the latter reaction.

"Huh," she said, noncommittally, as the sound of approaching footsteps drew her from her internal dilemma.

"Hi, Lori," chirped Leni as she strolled into view. Again, Lori was taken aback. In contrast to their brother, Leni was almost dressed entirely normally, sporting her usual frilled dress and sandals. Where normalcy ended, however, was at the black domino mask strapped onto her face, one that was nearly identical to one being worn by Lincoln.

"Why are you—" Lori began, only to catch herself, and redirect her question to the obvious perpetrator of this strange situation she'd suddenly found herself in.

"Why are you guys here?" Lori asked, looking Lincoln square in the face. "And what's the deal with the masks?"

"Mom said I could visit you at your Hero job," Lincoln explained. "So I thought I should come in costume. Just in case you needed...a HAND!"

With a flick of his wrist, Lincoln produced a handful of playing cards, seemingly from thin air, and deftly spread them out with a mere twitch of his fingers. It was actually pretty impressive how far he'd come with that trick. Clearly, practice did make perfect.

"And Leni?" Lori asked, glancing toward her fellow blonde.

"I chaperoning Linky," he replied, cheerfully. Lori stifled a frustrated groan.

"I meant, why are you wearing a mask," she asked, as patiently as possible.

"Oh. Linky said you're supposed to wear a costume at a Hero job," Leni explained, "but I was running low on fabric, so I made this."

Leni did a little pirouette and struck a pose. Both feet planted firmly on the ground, one hand resting against her waist, and the other resting horizontally across her forehead, with her fingers extending into a V.

"I'm, The Leni," she said, holding her pose for a few more seconds, before dropping back into her normal stance. "My powers are being Linky's sister."

"Of course they are," Lori deadpanned.

"And is that your costume?"

Lori froze at her sister's question, the asking of which brought several, rather pertinent concerns to mind. The first was that yes, she was still dressed in what could charitably be called her "work clothes". The second was that as the situation had devolved into the type of shenanigans that were inevitable with her family around, her arms had gradually begun to slacken, and she was now holding her little brother entirely too close to her exposed cleavage. And the third, which may or may not have been a related issue, was that Lincoln was no longer looking her in the eyes.

Trying to ignore the sudden burning in her cheeks, Lori gently placed Lincoln on the ground and took a step back. She couldn't help but notice that his head continued to adjust as she shifted him around, but never did his gaze rise to meet hers.

"It's cute," Leni continued, pursing her lips thoughtfully. "But I think I liked your other one better. What do you think, Linky?"

"I don't know why," Lincoln replied, his voice oddly monotone. "But I'm pretty sure it's the best costume ever."

An odd mixture of shame and...pride(?) flushed through Lori at her brother's words, leaving her confused as to how she should take the compliment. In the end, self-consciousness won out, and as discretely as possible, Lori crossed her arms over her chest and turned away from her siblings. It occurred to her that this didn't exactly help matters much, given the nature of her attire, but at this point, she was already committed.

"A-anyway," she said, internally wincing as her voice shot up several octaves higher than she'd intended, "It's great that you guys came down to see me, but I'm pretty sure we're about done for the day. Lemme go checkwithmybossokayBYE!"

Without waiting for a reply, Lori dashed forward, her superhumanly strong legs quickly carrying her away from her siblings, and deeper into the car lot.

While Flip's conduct typically called into question his status as a human being, his business acumen was fairly difficult to deny. His car lot, poorly maintained for the most part, and outright dilapidated in parts, was loaded with product, and new supply came in about as readily as it went out. This was presumably how he had the funding to waste on boondoggles like this commercial, which was almost certainly past the point where it might turn a reasonable profit.

It occurred to Lori, as she jogged through the grounds, now strangely devoid of life, that she'd never put much stock into where vehicles like the ones she was attempting to hawk by association, actually came from. But as she rounded the corner of the main office exterior, she suddenly felt like she had enough information to form a decent theory.

The dozens of employees that had previously been serving as an ad-hoc production crew now crowded around what seemed to be a small structure, situated in the rear of the lot. This was unusual, because to Lori's knowledge, no such building had existed on her previous visits, but as she drew closer, she noticed a key, explanatory detail. Wheels. Oversized as it was, the structure was mobile. It was also extremely worn, making it an odd fit for its surroundings.

"—I don't care!" She heard Flip exclaim as she slid through the crowd, eventually finding the berating a pale-faced underling, in a situation oddly similar to the one she'd found herself in with him not too long ago.

"I shelled out plenty of moolah for this thing, and it's time Flip gets what's coming to him!" Yelled the proprietor, his usage of the third-person causing Lori to wince internally. "If the crowbars aren't working, break out the thermite lance. That's what it's for! Tell the boys I want that hatch open yesterday!"

As the bereaved young man fled, presumably to carry out his instruction, Flip leaned back and gazed up, admiringly, at his prize. Unsure how to proceed, Lori settled on a polite cough.

"Now wha—" Flip began as he whirled around, cutting himself short as he recognized who was trying to get his attention.

"Ah," he said. "It's just you, Loud."

He turned back around, directing a dismissive wave at her. "Get lost, we're done for today. I've got bigger fish to fry."

That should have been her cue to leave, but against her better judgment, Lori stepped forward to get a better look at the thing.

"What is this?" She asked, curious.

"New acquisition of mine," Flip replied, proudly. "One of my crews dug this up out in the Outskirts. Cost me a pretty penny to get it back here, but it's worth it. Ain't she a beauty?"

Salvage then. It certainly looked the part. Wheeled though it may have been, the thing was the size of a small house, and it had certainly seen better days. What piqued Lori's interest, however, was the exterior, which was covered in rigid, metallic plating. Armor of some kind, presumably. In Lori's, admittedly amateur estimation, the thing wouldn't have looked out of place on a battlefield.

"What's this supposed to be for?" She asked, glancing at Flip out of the corner of her eye. "If you don't mind me asking."

"No clue," he shrugged, clearly unconcerned with his own ignorance. "But it's big and it's got wheels. By my count, that makes it a car. Least, enough for me to sell it. Figure we'll crack her open, clear out the good stuff, give it a new-ish coat of paint, and sell it as a luxury camper."

"You think there'll be 'good stuff' inside?"

"Course there will," Flip scoffed. "It came from the Outskirts, kid. Stuff that got left out there wasn't by choice, it's because the poor schmucks had to grab what they could and run. Nasty stuff roaming out there, but if you can finagle the return trip, it's pretty much...always...worth..."

The shift in Flip's voice was jarring. His boisterous, self-assured tone, suddenly giving way to uncertainty and confusion mid-sentence. Again, Lori looked his way, but now Flip's gaze was fixated solely off to the side, his neck bobbing back and forth, craning for a look at something beyond the crowd. The significance of Flip suddenly finding something more important than bragging about his good fortune was not lost on the eldest Loud sibling, and Lori meant to ask what could have possibly captured his attention so completely. But before the words could leave her mouth, she stopped herself.

Because that's when she heard the screaming.