PROLOUG

Huh…

What should I do!. I was thinking about something in my classroom while my teacher was teaching about JAVA. I was not paying attention to the subject. I had other thoughts in my head about what to do about my mother and my family. they given me everything I needed and asked for in my life. but I on the other hand only given them pain and suffering. But even after that they never shunned me or said anything bad about me. They always said only one thing " DO YOUR BEST ". It's not like I didn't try anything. But whatever I tried didn't work or or something intervened like Internet getting cut off or that website was blocked only for me.... So I gave up on everything even on life.

And now I'm trying think of something…. As I thought. A orange and red flame accompanied with a loud BANG#.

That's all I remember. now I am here all I could see or I can't see because it's pitch black where ever I look it's all black. I couldn't see anyone like my classmates nor teacher who was teaching my JAVA class second ago. I took a minute calm down no I was already calm. So I started to think what might have happened and came to conclusions that including me everyone might have died by that explosion. And I am in my soul state. You might think why I so calm because I watched and read lot means lots of anime's, manga and novels. So I was not that shaken by the situation. If I had to tell the truth I was somewhat relieved and happy and at the same time sad.

I was relieved and happy because I am out of that disgusting world here I felt suffocated every sec I was there. It's not because nothing was working in my life but because I always felt. I was in cage or something like this not the place I should be like feeling.

And sad because my mother would cry if I am not there. I hated the thought of her crying. The only existence that I cared about was her and my family. I hated making them suffer and sad.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAEERRRRRRRRRRR I started crying, whaling out

AAAAAEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRhow I should have make them happy

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA how I-I been a good son too them

AAAAAAAAAEEERRRRRRRRRRR why am I like this…..

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA why can't I do anything…..

BWWAAWWAAAWAWAWA why couldn't I do it ….

AAAA.... Why am I different from everyone …

While crying and whaling I fell a sleep... I don't know why but I feel comfortable here…. Like I am sleeping on my mother's lap...