Some Preparation Required, Part 1

I jotted down the phrase 'Memento Mori' in a note and then slipped it into Divah's journal for later because I didn't have time to figure out this new mystery right now. I wouldn't even know where to begin, which was fine, because, as Divah often claimed, "Of the few things that cannot long be hidden, truth is the most insistent of them all, kiddo."

"When you're ready to learn the truth, the Norns will guide you, but not before," Divah had once promised me when I'd asked her about Extra Life. "So, stop fretting, and just practice the damn sword dance already, you little procrastinator!"

Yep, my master was wise beyond her years. But maybe not as 'beyond' as Divah would care to admit. She was nearly a hundred now.

Faustus's cryptic phrase would have to wait though as I was easily distracted by new developments.

A will o' wisp arrived in class to inform us that Beginner Professions was canceled today because Master Barad was away on business for the Academy. In a hollow voice, the floating ball of blue fire also asked us to "Wait here for more details on the schedule change."

Yep, the ghostly flames that traversed the mortal and deathly planes were little more than couriers for the Academy's masters.

As for missing my first Beginner Professions, I didn't mind it too much as I had already chosen a support profession for my adventures. Alchemy. Duh. Well, there was one other thing, but I'll leave that reveal for later on. Still, it would have been nice to see how the other apprentices tackled jobs like blacksmithing and beast taming to see which of them might be worth investing in later on.

"Is Beginner Professions any good?" I asked Dess.

"Hel yes, it is," she replied enthusiastically. "Baran's super cool, and every class is a different job so it's never boring."

"Wednesday we tried enchanting," Scaredy Cat chimed in.

He was seated in front of me and Dess. Beside him sat the scrawny infernal boy I'd beaten up in P.E.

"I liked enchanting," the infernal said in a voice so weak I could barely hear him.

"Monday was Herbalism, and it was so~~o icky," Tessa the cloud nymph spoke up.

The girl seated next to her, a dwarf with her red hair neatly braided into a crown circling her carrot-top head, guffawed at Tessa's remark. "A little hard labor might do you some good, princess," she said in a low, baritone voice.

"I liked last Friday's class, remember?" Dess piped up.

"Tattooing." Brunhilde, who sat at the very front of the class, but had a voice that rang clear across to where I was sitting near the back also added, "I liked it too."

"As if you could ink someone's arm with your big, clumsy fingers," Lohgan mocked.

It would have spelled another fight between the half-giant and the wood elf, but one look at the dökkálfar mistress who just entered the room, and everyone shut up instantly. Seats were taken and backs were straightened while all eyes became glued to the front.

She was tall and lithe, which was typical of dark elves, but her skin was a darker shade of purple than the blue or charcoal gray tones of most dökkálfar.

"Good tidings, Mistress Lorelai," the novices all said together.

The dökkálfar with long braided silver hair gave the class a curt nod of acknowledgment.

"Wow, when did you guys become so well-behaved," I teased in Dess's ear.

She glanced at me with wide eyes and mouthed, 'Don't.'

I didn't understand the warning until I felt the wind pass me by and then saw the tail end of the spear that pierced the floor between my seat and Dess's.

"Frigid Hel…" My gaze snapped forward and found milky purple irises boring into my eyes while a lopsided smirk played on Mistress Lorelai's face.

A flash of memory struck me suddenly. A warning Divah had given me before I'd left for the Academy four days ago.

"There's a dark elf there who's been in the Academy as long as Dwalinn, and she's twice as crazy as that drunkard… So, try not to get on Lorelai Lindisfarne's bad side, kiddo," Divah had warned.

'Ah, crap…' I sighed.

"You and I are going to have a lot of fun together. Just like your master and I back in the day," Mistress Lorelai said, and I could hear the promise of a grueling future in her soft voice.

Mistress Lorelai spent another second giving me a wolf-eyed stare that made mine feel like an amateur's attempt at the real thing, and then her gaze drifted over to the other novices in class. I watched them all flinch away from her eyes like I should have done. Dumb me.

"You novices are lucky. You get an extra hour of Swords and Sorcery today, and you know what that means." Mistress Lorelai raised her hand forward. A moment later, her spear—the one that was sticking out halfway off the floor dangerously close to me—pulled itself out of the ground and flew back to her waiting hand. "Prepare your gear, apprentices... we're heading out!"

I expected groans and quivers, but the mood in the class shifted suddenly and everyone got lively again.

"That's right. It's time for a pop quiz." Mistress Lorelai hefted her spear over her shoulder. "We're going on a dungeon excursion!"

***

The sun was high in the sky, but the surrounding area was covered in a light fog. The ground was wet from the rain that had died down when the Academy's rainbow portal dropped our apprentice class onto Earthly soil.

Yep, I was home.

It had only been a few days since Divah pushed me into another multicolored portal, but I had to admit that I was feeling nostalgic for that polluted breath of not-so-fresh air you could only get in our world. Honestly, Yggdrasil's environment was a little too clean for my human lungs to fully acclimate to. My non-human fellow novices didn't share my sentiments though. A few of them had already started to cough.

"Vargr…" Lohgan began chewing on a stalk of breath leaf to calm his lungs down. "How do humans stand this foulness?"

"This is nothing compared to Nidavellir's smog," said the red-headed dwarf girl in the blue cloak who hadn't been around for P.E. earlier today.

Her crown braids sat atop a head that held a cute childish face one might not normally associate with dwarves as even their females usually had the hardened looks of workers built into them. Not this redhead though. Her features were softer; Thin red eyebrows over big doe brown eyes, a stubby nose between prominent apple cheeks, and puffy red lips above a cleft chin. She was also the tallest of the four dwarves in my class, and not as broad-shouldered as her male counterparts.

"The smog's so thick in Mythril City that they've become sentient pests our Smithguard have to wipe out every few months," she explained.

"It's not that bad." Dess took in a big gulp of air. "This breezy country air's refreshing."

"Where are we anyway?" Scaredy Cat asked.

"We are near an abandoned cemetery in the Irish countryside south of Dublin," Mistress Lorelai answered.

"Oo~~oh, I've never been to Earth before," Dess whispered to me. "What kind of souvenirs should I—"

"Look alive, novices." Mistress Lorelai nodded to a figure approaching us from the north. "Our guide's here."

Once he'd arrived in front of us, the tiny, pointy-eared, elf-like creature in the crisp green military uniform took off his green bowler hat and then bowed to Mistress Lorelai.

"Lieutenant Doyle of the Lair Endorsement, Procurement, Reconnaissance, and Observational Command Agency," he said as an introduction. His accent was a thick Irish one too.

"Hey, it's a lep—"

Mistress Lorelai sent a pointed glare at Tessa, causing the frightened cloud nymph's puffy hair to lose a bit of volume.

"For those of you who are unaware"—Her milky purple irises glided over our group—"LEPRCON is responsible for the discovery and management of any dungeons that come into existence within the realmsverse. They provide permits and information for dungeon excursions, act as sherpas, and assist adventurers through the operation of basecamps."

The tiny LEPRCON officer puffed out his chest.

"Agents such as Lieutenant Doyle provide a lifeline inside dungeons that budding adventurers such as yourselves will sorely need for the trials ahead," Mistress Lorelai emphasized those last words. "So, give him all the courtesy and respect he is due. Yes?"

"Ma'am," Lieutenant Doyle winked at Lorelai, "you forgot to mention the—"

"Ah, yes." Mistress Lorelai turned her gaze back on us. "Any of you interested in LEPRCON's Future Explorers Retreat?"

More than a few hands went up. Dess included. Lieutenant Doyle began counting these hands. He smiled once that number had gone past ten.

I didn't know what a future explorer's retreat was about but it did have the word 'explorer' in it and that was enough for me to raise my hand too. Like Divah often says, "Never fail to heed the call of adventure when it passes you by."

"Don't forget to sign up with Lieutenant Doyle at the end of the excursion or you'll miss out on a week-long trip away from campus," Mistress Lorelai instructed. She let us cheer over this piece of interesting news before urging us onward. "Now, let's hurry along. We've got a dungeon to clear and monsters to hunt..."