Chapter 30 A Story of Love – The Beginning

When my feet finally touched solid ground, I allowed my eyes to take in the scene before me and felt shocked by what I saw. We had arrived in the middle of the night and were now standing in the middle of an oasis in the freaking desert.

The sky above me was riddled with stars and nothing else as the moon was nowhere to be found and on the ground I saw thousands of twinkling fires close to and around what appeared to be a cliffside.

When I looked up the rocky incline, despite how dark it was, I saw that there were still more bonfires scattered there and I caught the sound of laughing voices and of sheep. Where in the world were we?

"Come," Abraham said as if this place was not new to Him, and with His hand on my arm, He led me through a pathway of sand, brambles on either side and rocks underfoot that skirted the entire face of the incline.

"Abraham, can I ask where we are? This seems like we are in the middle of the desert but I am not sure if that is correct or why we would be in this place."

"You are correct, we are in the middle of the desert and you will soon see why coming here to start our story of Love was important. Just look around and pay attention to what we´ll see. You´ll soon understand."

I continued walking beside Abraham and the more I looked around the more I was able to take in from the amazing place where we had landed.

The wind was gently moving through enormous palm trees and off to the sides where I saw fires blazing I saw tufts of green grass scattered about that also moved to the breeze. Also, not too far away from where we were, a little down an incline, I became aware of blinking lights that expanded far and wide and I soon realized that I was staring at what seemed to be a small town or village.

My feet began to take me in the direction of civilization but I found a gentle pressure against the inner part of my right arm and when I looked up at Abraham I saw that He was trying to lead me away and not towards the small town. In fact, we soon found ourselves facing a group of men – shepherds I realized – that were gathered in a small group of about 6 men and 2 boys talking and eating while their flock stood around them grazing.

"This night is special," I heard one of the men saying to the others. "Do you see the stars moving about? Do you see that big one over there?" And then I saw him pointing toward the sky.

When I looked up my eyes landed on what I knew to be a huge comet that was traversing the enormous expanse of dark sky. The comet was so shiny that it overcame the other stars and lit up the sky as if it were the moon. But what was even more shocking to me was that it seemed as if that comet was coming directly to where we were.

"How do you mean special?" I suddenly heard another one of the men saying and I moved my attention over to the group again, intent on learning about this event.

"I don´t know how, I just know that something special is happening today. I mean, look at that shiny star. Have you ever seen something that big and that shiny?"

"Do you think it brings a portent?" A third man from the group piped up.

"I don´t know if it is a portent but I know that something that impressive only happens when a very important event will take place."

"Father, will it be good or bad?" One of the younger boys spoke up.

"I am not sure my son," the man claimed. "But let´s keep our eyes open, all right? Maybe we will be able to see what it is this star is telling us."

I saw the boys suddenly standing up and moving off toward a group nearby and soon we saw a lot of activity kicking up as more and more people went around the entire cliff, also up the cliff towards the groups that were sheltering themselves in the small caves littered all over the face of the rock. Soon, we became witnesses to a great increase in activity and I wondered why a simple comet – as beautiful as it was – could be taken as if magic had just happened.

"Abraham, what is going on here? Why would a comet be such a big deal?"

"You are forgetting that these are simple folk for whom these types of events are a big deal. They read these kinds of things differently from what people like you – who rely on science so much - do. And you will soon see why they are right to think what they do. Pay close attention.

Suddenly I began to hear the shuffling of feet close to us on the pathway that led to the small town and when I looked at the reason for the sound I found myself looking at a young man, dressed in desert garb, holding a big walking wooden stick and leading a donkey. On top of the donkey lay a beautiful and very young girl who was evidently pregnant and it seemed as if her time to deliver the baby had come for she was breathing deeply. She did not grumble or make sounds of pain yet but I felt sorry for her. It could not be comfortable being on top of a moving animal when you were about to give birth.

The small family continued on their way through the pathway and the man looked dejected about something. I wondered what had him looking so down. But then, as I looked at them again I began to realize that for some reason they were moving slowly, very slowly, away from the town – where it would only be logical that they stay to look for a midwife – instead of going towards it. Who were these poor souls and why were they looking so sad? And why were they on a journey instead of looking for a place to stay while the young girl delivered her baby? And then I stared at the sweet and tender face of the young girl and I gasped.

I had seen many beautiful girls and women in my life, so seeing one more should not have shocked me. However, there was something about this girl that redefined beauty. She had long brown hair and tanned skin but it was the sweetness in her features, and especially her eyes, that drew me. In fact, I was even more shocked when the girl turned her face and stared right at me and smiled. Could she see me?

I turned towards Abraham to see if He was also seeing what I was seeing and found His eyes trained on the young girl´s eyes and smiling in a way that I had never seen Him smile. He exuded tenderness and a deep emotion towards this young girl that I could barely grasp and again I wondered who she was.

"Abraham, who is she? Is she able to see me?" I asked softly, almost as if I were afraid to disturb the interaction between Him and the girl.

"She can always see you, my child and she loves you."

I turned my head back and forth between the two of them – Abraham and the young girl – and could not fathom who this woman was or why Abraham was staring at her as if she were the rising sun. Maybe she was? Maybe I knew her?

"You do," Abraham stated without looking at me. "You´ve known her your whole life and she has always kept you in her heart. She prays for you more than anyone has ever done."

"Abraham, who is she?"

"You´ll soon see. This story of Love started with her."

I returned my face toward the moving family and somewhere deep within me, I began to feel memories stirring. Memories of a story long ago in a small desert town that had been told through the millennia. Could this be the story unfolding before my eyes? I had heard it told many times and had lived the holidays that sprang from it but I never imagined that I would get to actually live it. My interest peaked.

"Come on Emily, let´s go with them," Abraham said. We began to move after the retreating family.

At some point, we saw the man leading the donkey approaching one of the many groups of herders to ask for help.

"Excuse me, sir, could you point me towards the closest shelter?" The young man asked.

The shepherd looked up at the man mid-chew, swallowed his food fast as soon as he saw the young pregnant girl, and immediately pointed towards some sheds near the farthest side of the cliff.

"Young lad, you should head to town, your wife will need the assistance of a midwife," one of the older herders said as he took in the state of the young girl."

"We come from there and we spent a good time looking for shelter. Unfortunately, given that all the inns are filled to the brim there was no room for us. We were indicated by a very kind woman that we would be able to find someplace to stay the night at least somewhere here. I´m sorry to intrude kind sir."

"No intrusion young lad. Those town folk can be truly hard on young travelers and even more so given the state your wife is in. Now, if you keep moving down this road you will find some sheds against the cliffside. You can put your young wife there. They are not much, a bit drafty and all, and some animals are staying the night there, but I bet their warm breath will only help heat the space."

"Thank you, kind sir. I bid you a fair night," the young man said and he went back to his donkey and his family. Soon they began moving again down the road and towards the sheds that had been indicated. Abraham and I moved along with them and as time went by I became aware of the fact that the young girl´s breathing was growing shorter and shorter, which indicated she was moving through contractions. I did not know if she was in pain as she was not emitting even a grunt. But from her breathing, I understood she was advanced in her childbearing.

We finally reached the first shed on the long row of them, all against the rocks, and I felt sorry for the young family. The place was nothing short of rundown, with barely two rough wooden walls supporting a thatched roof and the interior being mostly exposed to the elements as there was no front wall or door. The roof had portions that were caved in but this did not seem to matter to the family.

The man helped his young wife from the donkey and led her into the shed and it seemed it was a good thing those sheds were used to store animals because they were packed with hay and they had a water trough. I also realized that deep within the shed the family had selected stood an ox but the animal was barely disturbed by the human presence and the family moved about their business despite their companion.

The young man first spread hay on the ground and placed his cloak over it to then lead his wife and help her down to the ground. He then went back for the donkey, untacked it, and led it inside to place it beside the ox. He then went back towards another group of shepherds and asked where he could gather water and after gathering it went back to the shed. Later, he took the cloak from the young girl and the small bundle she had been carrying in her lap, unwrapped a small number of tiny clothes evidently meant for the baby that was to come and placed everything near the water through. He then took even more hay, placed the young woman´s cloak over it, and then placed some of the swaddling clothes near the woman. After washing his hands with the water he moved towards his wife and got ready to help her in the delivery.

"Look up Emily," Abraham suddenly instructed beside me and I did. My eyes stared at the night sky and at the passing comet that was right at this moment precisely over where the shed was. But what was even more astounding was that light was emanating from the comet´s tail as if it were a shower and it landed right on top of…

A baby´s wail suddenly pierced the night and I was going to look into the shed when Abraham´s arm pointed me instead towards where the first of shepherds we had seen was. The entire valley near the cliffside had been bathed by an intense light and although I could not see anything beside it, I did hear sounds exactly like the ones I had seen in the heavenly garden not too long ago. It was a beautiful melody that extended far and wide and warmed my heart and I saw as the eyes of all shepherds that had heard the melody turned towards the shed where the wailing baby was.

My eyes went back and forth unable to stay in one place. There was just so much taking place and all of it was so interesting that I simply did not know where to focus my attention.

"Glory to God in the highest, and peace on earth to those whom He loves," I heard inside my head as the song continued. How did I know those were the words these herders were hearing? Maybe because my mind had finally understood and accepted what it was seeing. I witnessed, firsthand, the birth of Emmanuel and the family was no more and no less than the Holy Family.

"Come, Emily, let´s go and look inside. We will soon find the small shed filled to capacity with astounded human beings trying to get a glimpse of the newborn."

Abraham and I moved inside the shed.

"Abraham, why did we start this story here exactly?" I asked as we passed into the now sacred place.

"Because this very night the love that God has for all human beings was fully expressed. The Incarnation and the birth of the Savior, of Emmanuel, was the fullest expression not just of God´s salvation intent but also of His Love. That tiny baby that you are about to see is the joining of two natures, two perfectly harmonious natures, and that God within that human body chose to be a part of human history as one more human being."

"Why does it feel like that word you emphasized is crucial for me to remember?"

"Because it is Emily. Because nothing of what happened tonight and what happened afterward was simply random. God did not need to be born as a human baby or depend on human parents, live a life as a human being, and suffer what He did to save humanity. I am God and I could have saved humanity with a word."

I turned to Him at first, but seeing that His eyes were trained ahead, I turned again and came face to face with the most common and yet uncommon scene of all.

Before me stood a beautiful but very normal baby boy - a crying baby boy - and yet, that tiny human being was anything but normal. Within that perfect and tiny body, my nature and His nature had combined perfectly into one and thus joined humanity and the Divinity. And He had chosen - even though He did not need to – to be like any one of us from conception until His death and for eternity. Was there anything more profound, more important, than that?

My eyes landed on the baby and His gorgeous but tired Mother. She was holding Him now against her chest and the young man, Joseph, stared at the two of them with a tenderness that brought tears to my eyes. I could barely comprehend the greatness of the scene before me. I had heard this story so many times, and seen so many movies and plays, but not once had I truly thought about the meaning of this night, the meaning of God choosing to be one of us; choosing to be like us.

From here on out, that tiny bundle of perfection, that God turned human would start living life and experiencing exactly what all of us experienced, the joy and the suffering, even though He had never needed to do so. Was there a purer or stronger love?

I was suddenly distracted from my inner reflection by the sound of multiple feet shuffling behind Abraham and me and when I turned around I saw that a lot of the shepherds that we had seen scattered around had now come here to do exactly what I was doing. They had come to stare at the very picture of Divine Love bundled into a tiny baby boy.

The look I saw in the eyes of these men and young boys, the look of wonder and awe, struck me like very little had before. These men had experienced a life-changing event outside a few minutes ago but even that did not seem to be as awe-inspiring as the sight of that baby boy. They did not speak, they did not enter beyond the outer part of the rooftop and all their eyes stared at that beautiful human being in His mother´s arms as if He were the response to all their worries and problems. I guess in a sense He was.

And then I became aware of the fact that the once dark shed had been filled by a bluish light and when I looked up towards the sky that was visible from the caved part of the rooftop I saw that the comet had inexplicably reduced its speed, almost as if it had stopped right above where this shed stood, and its light cascaded down impregnating the entire place with it.

I also became aware of another incredible event. The animals, both the ox and the donkey, as well as the sheep some of the herders had brought with them, remained absolutely silent and still, almost as if they too were entranced by the imposing presence of this Divine Child.

"Excuse me, young lad," one of the herders at the very front of the line spoke up addressing the young Joseph. "We were told just now of this baby being born right now and we wanted to offer you our assistance if that is not too much?"

The young Joseph approached all of us and although he looked worn out from the trip and the events of the night he did not stop smiling kindly.

"Any help is more than appreciated, dear sir," the young man said to the shepherd.

"I´m sorry to be so bold and upfront, but, could we see the child? We know you must be tired from your travel and well… your young wife must be exhausted but…"

And then I heard the woman´s voice for the first time and it was the sweetest sound I had ever heard in my life. "Please, do come in. Here," she said and extended her baby to her husband. The young Joseph took the child in his arms with the utmost care and brought Him to the front.

The little child was waving His fists and His head turned from one side to the other evidently looking for food. But when He was brought up by His father and placed in such a way that we could all look at Him and His tender face, I was struck anew by the vision of this baby´s dark eyes. I knew He could not see anything as an infant and that most of His reactions were more instinct than learned and premeditated behaviors but that did not dampen the power of that stare.

"What would your baby´s name be, young lad?"

"Please, call me Joseph and this is my wife, Mary," the young Joseph stated while he moved to the side to allow the shepherds to see the young Mary.

"We thank you all for coming here tonight. But how did you know of my son´s birth?" Mary asked gently from the floor where she was still lying, not yet answering the question about the name of the baby.

"We were out there in the pastures, caring for our flock and talking when the strangest thing happened. We first noticed that star above us moving and we knew something important was happening. But then we also saw it stopping right where you and your family decided to stay the night and after that this really bright light appeared all over the valley and some strange beings appeared to let us know of this event. They asked us to stand and come here to be the first witnesses of this important moment."

Mary and Joseph looked at one another with a smile on their lips and then Joseph looked down at the tiny boy in his arms.

"We are glad you came and we welcome you," the young Joseph said gently, his eyes now stationary on the baby´s face. He was as awed by the beautiful human in his arms as were the rest of us.

I then turned to look at Abraham and noticed that He had not uttered a single word since the baby was born and I wondered why. However, when I looked at Him I realized that He was completely oblivious of His surroundings and His eyes seemed to be far away as they stared at the precious bundle.

"Divinity and humanity embraced within a tiny human baby…" I heard Him muttering softly. "A desire so deep and so strong, a wish that could only be realized by the Incarnation, and now here it is, the very Depth of Love."

He then turned to me and said, "This, Emily, is the very Depth of Love." He pointed towards the baby boy.

My eyes returned to the child who was now crying evidently wishing to be returned to His mother so she could feed Him. The young Joseph returned the infant to the mother and then went outside with the other men. However, before they all moved away to give them privacy, I saw a young child coming up to her and shyly extending a small piece of bread and cheese.

"Gentle lady, what will be your baby´s name?" the child asked of her as she accepted the tender offering and thanked him with a smile.

"His name shall be Jesus," she responded and after that, the young child smiled back at her, retreated, and returned to his family and friends.

"Come, Emily, it´s time for us to retreat as well," I suddenly heard Abraham saying and with His hand in my arm He led us away and back out into the night.

It took us several minutes in silence to reach a spot that Abraham had chosen for us to take a break. He prepared a bonfire from thick brambles and some wood that we found nearby and we both sat down, neither of us saying much as the fire crackled.

"Why Abraham, tell me why?" I suddenly asked as the fire heated me. While I waited for Him to respond to my sudden and apparently disconnected question I looked up to the sky and saw that the comet had now resumed its course across the sky as if nothing extraordinary had just happened and this were an ordinary occurrence.

"Why did Emmanuel choose to assume human nature? Why did the Second Person of the Trinity become flesh?"

"You know how I told you before that He did not need to become human that He chose that?"

"Yeah, you said He made that choice but what I do not understand is why. Why submit Himself to the difficulties of a human life and make Himself that vulnerable? Why?"

"Let me start by asking you, Emily, what is love? How do you define love?"

The question completely took me by surprise. The truth was that I had never truly thought of that. What was love?

"I guess it's a feeling? Maybe an emotion that brings people together? To be absolutely honest, I have never tried to define it."

"Emotions, feelings, are simply responses to certain events. They strengthen the connection between human beings and help to deepen that connection. But love, real love, although fed by feelings and emotions, is not the same. In fact, you will see that true love comes even when the beauty of emotions runs dry. But, you are right, emotions are part of the reason why God chose to become human.

"You see, most people believe that the Incarnation, the decision of God to assume human flesh, is strictly tied to the original fall and this belief has led many to ask a very logical question. If God is love and is omnipotent and omniscient, then why did He not stop the fall from happening? Why did He need to establish a salvation plan if He could have stopped the fall altogether? Some of the explanations I am about to give you you already received before when you were shown how and why Creation took place. But that does not respond to your question. So now, I will answer that.

"Let me ask you this, Emily, why do you love your kids? How do you know you love your husband?" Abraham asked me out of the blue. I closed my eyes and thought about his question.

"Well, I have never really thought about that. From the moment I conceived my children I had this deep connection within me to them, it was really strong, and it made me feel that I would do anything for them. I guess I would have to go back to feeling because I do not know how else to explain it. And about my husband, again, feeling would be the response. From the moment I saw him I felt that my heart belonged to him and I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. I wanted to share everything with him, be everything for him and I wanted that back."

"So again, you are referring to feeling. However, did your love for them, for your kids and husband, diminish and disappear when difficulties appeared? With your kids, there is a very deep connection given by the fact that you conceived and carried them within you. But with your husband, when you guys hit difficult moments, how did you know you still loved him?"

I pondered His questions carefully and realized that I had never asked myself any of this. As Abraham said, with my son and daughter the answers were faster and clearer but not so with my husband. How did I know what love was?

"Don´t worry my child," Abraham said, cutting my thoughts short. "Most human beings, if not all, cannot truly define love because what you have of it are descriptors. You know what revolves around love. So let´s stick with that. You know you love your husband and your kids because you wish to be with them always, because you want to give yourself to them, because you think of them before even yourself, and because they are more important to you than yourself. You are willing to sacrifice yourself for them and even during hardships you still feel the same. These are only elements around what love is but they bring clarity.

"Now, think of this. You know what makes part of love, its elements, but you still cannot explain why you feel that way towards those you love or how those feelings came to be. What´s more, you cannot explain why, despite difficulties, you still love your loved ones, am I correct?"

I nodded at that.

"The definition of Love is God," Abraham stated and I looked at Him as if He had grown an extra head.

"What?"

"Think about who God is and think why He would be Love and therefore He would be the definition of Love."

"God is a community of Persons that…" but I was not able to say anything else as my brain struggled with the knowledge I had of God.

"God is a community, that is true, and yet it is One. What does it mean for God to be a community? The very reason for Love stands in that answer. Think of what makes up a community and what is important and add this thought: Man was created in the image and likeness of God. Man was made to be a part of that Love. When you think about that you see why Emmanuel, the Second Person, chose to become human and share in all that means to be human, even share the suffering and death brought on by sin."

"A community is a congregation of people who are connected by common denominators, I guess?"

"Yes, that is true. And yet, a community, although having commonalities that tie the members, is not built from carbon copies of one person. Think about the Trinity for a second and tell me what you know."

I thought about the request and allowed my memories to surface. What came forward was the image of the Father, the Holy Spirit, and the rosette at the bottom. I guess that rosette was some form of representation of Emmanuel.

"The Trinity is formed by a Father, a Son, and a Holy Spirit," I began to give my answer slowly. "They are Three Persons each with His own identity and yet they are One, meaning they are not three gods but One God. One essence and nature but three personalities."

"What connects the Three?"

"Love connects the Three?"

"So how can God be Love and be connected by Love?"

"I have no idea, Abraham."

"God is a community, that is correct, that springs from this: A Father who wishes to share Himself and that desire gives rise to a Son, identical in nature to the Father and yet different in personality. And then a connection between the two of them that is also a Person, identical to the other two in nature. These Three are a community. So, the first important point to make is that Love is sharing and connection. The Father wished to share who He is with another and that gives rise to the Son. Mind you, I said gives rise which does not mean the Son was created or generated, all right? The Son is, the same as the Holy Spirit. Neither were created or generated from the desire of the Father. But Love has to be shared and that need materialized and took form in the other two Persons.

"Now, God is love because of that sharing, that community that gives mutually and is connected by Love because of the Third Person, the Holy Spirit, which is the very connection between the two other Persons. That´s who the Holy Spirit is."

"This is a lot to take in Abraham," I said.

"The next step is this. Since Love needs to share itself constantly, because that is the crucial characteristic of Love, it wanted to expand further and that desire brought the Trinity to create beings with whom God could share that Love. All living beings – angels, humans, animals, and plants – were created precisely because of this desire. But if you think about this carefully you will see this. From those groups, only one was chosen to share two natures, a spiritual nature and a physical nature. All the others have only one. What is crucial here? Can you think of why having those two natures for human beings is important? Why did God choose to make Man with two essences? And why did God make Man to exist in communities?"

I remained quiet now. I was overwhelmed with what I was hearing.

"Each man was created as a unique being with a set of characteristics and not two human beings are exactly alike and then they were placed to exist together so that each one would complement the other. Then, because human beings are interdependent, and because they need others like themselves to exist, communities arose. In that sense, Man is in the image and likeness of God. Because of their very nature, they need to share with each other and this creates a connection and therefore a community.

"Now, Man was not made perfect from the very beginning. That was not random and it was not the result of the fall either. From the very beginning, God had special plans for human beings and He chose them to share with Him in a way that the others do not. He wanted to relate Himself with Man and He did this in two ways: first, He placed parts of Himself in Creation so that Man could discover Him bit by bit through that Creation. The second is He made Man capable of choosing to relate to Him as he discovered God and this choice came from Man´s capacity to feel and to know. And then, there was a third way in which God chose to relate Himself with Man and that is through the sharing of the two natures. This is because God knows Love as He is all-knowing and He is Love itself. However, because of His very nature, He cannot feel Love. And you are right, feelings and emotions, that come from physical interaction, are crucial to love. So, God wanted to deepen the connection with His human creatures even further through the choice of taking on human flesh."

My jaw dropped to the floor as the realization hit me. Did God love His human creatures that much?

"Yes, that is how deeply God loves Man. He loved Man so much that He chose, from eternity, to share in Man´s two natures. But the fall also played its part there. Because of the fall, God also chose to partake in the sufferings His human creatures went through to bring the Divine essence back into the human person but also to strengthen the bond between Divinity and humanity through the sharing of hardships and burdens."

The fire continued to crackle near me but I was no longer aware of it. My heart was so overwhelmed that I did not know what to say.

Apparently, I did not need to say anything. Abraham stood from His place and put out the fire. He extended His hand towards me and helped me up.

"Come on my child, we still have some places to be. This journey is not over yet."

Without saying anything more we began our walk through the night.